Chapter One

The day started as it usually did. Groggily, Jess leaned over to hit the doze button on my alarm clock clock. He was so tired because he had been doing 30 time of day a week at work lately and he was n't sleeping well because of his home sprightliness. Add in school and the homework that came along with it and it was midnight or later by the time he got to bed."Who invented these affair anyway ? ”, he thought as he climbed out of bed.

Showered and dressed, he went downstairs to get some breakfast."Hi Jess ”, his sidekick and sister said to him, almost in unison."Hi ”, he replied back. After eating breakfast, he went back upstairs to brush his tooth. Then he came downstairs again and went to see his mother. Jess always went to his female parent 's room and said"good morning"to her before leaving for schoolhouse. Why he still did, he was n't sure enough. He had become so aloof, there was no real link left."Probably just out of habit ”, he told himself. He kissed his mother goodbye and then left with his chum for school.

In the car, he and his brother did n't talk much. It was n't that they did n't like each other, but Jess and Luke had very little in common these days. They had different ally, Luke being more than of a mixer butterfly ; different tastes in music, Jess listened to more wakeless metal and rock, while Gospel of Luke was more into the pop euphony scene ; etc ... Once they got to schoolhouse, that was it. The car drive there was the most clock time they spent with each other in a day and whichever one was n't driving that day just stared at their speech sound the stallion ride.

Everyday he dreaded going to school. High School had never been"as publicise"to Jess. He was a loner, an outcast. He had not even a smattering of friends, everyone knew everyone, but that was about it. Recently he had been feeling to a greater extent and more depressed, his thoughts sometimes turning to suicide. Home life was ... well it was n't a household anymore ...

"Good break of the day Mr. horse ”, said his homeroom teacher, Mr. Toer."Morning ”, Jess replied back. He took his seat and started on the homework he did n't finish last night. mathematics was a particularly operose theme for Jess. He was just one bad grade away from failing the content for the semester, but at this point that was the end affair on his mind. Staring at the blank canvas of composition in front of him, his mind started to wander."What am I even doing here ? I have no purpose, no desire, no happiness. If I decided to just run away today, will anyone tending ? will my parents notice if I 'm not there ?"The buzzer for the end of home room rang, jolting him back into cognizance."shit it ”, he thought, realizing he had n't done a single problem.

When the bell rang at 3:05, he was already driving away from school ( his chum was in Reserve Officers Training Corps and stayed for after-school bodily process ), his foot to the floor and the radio clamor. euphony had become Jess'only reprieve from his life and he was retreating into it Sir Thomas More and more, barely paying attention to anything else. medicine made him find muscular, made him experience like he had a cause to live. It seemed that the language of the Song dynasty on the wireless spoke directly to him, lifting him up, making him sense happy that someone, somewhere understood what he felt.

When he got home, Jess went straight to his room. As he was changing into his oeuvre uniform, he took a smell at himself in the mirror. He was 16, had long, dark brown hair's-breadth, galvanizing blue eyes, was about six feet magniloquent, and had slim trunk. The person staring back at him looked so far away, it looked like him, but it was n't him. The eyes of the person in the mirror looked so desolate and empty-bellied it was shocking. Sighing to himself, he turned off the light and headed to work.

At work that nighttime, he just floated aimlessly through the evening, barely engaging the customers, just wanting the nighttime to end so that he could go home and sleep. nap, the one affair and one prison term of the day when he did n't feel hollow out, lifeless. When did n't feel anything but serenity. The next day was Saturday and he did n't have to go to work or school so he could catch some Z's all through the Night and well into the morning.

Opening the door to his house after work, Jess got a half-hearted"Hi"from his parents. The kind of"hi"that you say out of politeness, not because you actually meant it. He replied back, asked if anyone had made dinner that night, and then went to his room. Turning on his computer, he checked his e-mail. As usual, it was just a bunch of spam, but then Jess saw the e-mail. Wesley had responded to him ! Jess read the electronic mail, then shut off his computer and got into bed. Falling asleep, he smiled to himself, feeling some modest sense of hope.


criticism welcome. Like I said, let me sleep with if I should retain .