Sunlight streaming through the window in the bedchamber wakes me up. It's directly on my centre. Moaning I roll over in my sleeping bag and stuff my head under my pillow. A hired hand roughly tremble my shoulder and Tyler swipes the pillow from me.
"Get up, Natalie ! Don't make me tug you to school day again !"Tyler complains in exasperation. He's still shaking my shoulder. I open my oculus and glare at him. He's staring at me and still hasn't stopped shaking my shoulder.
"Let go of me !"I snap, irritated. He shakes his headland and disappears out into the principal room. Tyler's my sometime comrade. He's 20 twelvemonth old and we live in an apartment together. It only has a briny way which is big enough to be a kitchen, dining room, and living room in one, a single bedroom, and one full bath. Ty gets the bed, so I sleep in my bag on the base. It's been this way since I was 10, so I'm used to it. In fact, it's homey to me now. Reluctantly I climb out of my sleeping back and shudder in the chill. I supervene upon my"personal bed"as I call it and smooth my pillow. All of our wearing apparel are combined into one little water closet, so I have to rummage through Ty's clothes to rule mine. I pull out a field black tee and a pair of gloomy denim skinny denim.
The lav door is closed and I bang on it impatiently.
"What are you doing, Ty ? I need to get in there !"I holler through the room access. I need to get a shower quickly before school.
"Relax, the man isn't ending !"he hollers back.
"Unlike SOME the great unwashed, I have a schoolhouse to get to ! You DON'T !"I snap. The door swings open and Ty pushes past me, apparently irritated. I hurry in, lock the door, and rush through a shower. I step out and am surprised to take heed Tyler's voice very raised. I can't learn what he's saying because the door muffles it and water is clogging my ear, but I catch slight bits.
"…not have…why…other guy…you…how could…"was all I was getting. Could he be talking to a girlfriend ? Or an ex more likely. Tyler is such an astound guy and he's so kind, but he somehow comes home with the forged, gaudy girl around. They usually hang around long enough to fuck with him and then it's over. His later was Rosa, a slutty, whiny red-head who didn't even say hi when introduced to me. I personally wished he'd would go out with Miley Rowen, a senior at my school. She's so nice and funny and outgoing. As far as I know, she's even still a virgin so she's not after sex or anything. I think she'd make the perfective tense, solemn girlfriend for my Brother, but my opinion doesn't count.
I dress and leave the bathroom, hanging up my towel. I put my dress in the shackle just inside our chamber and psyche into the…well, I guess it's just the telephone exchange room or something. I don't know. Tyler is just hanging up the telephone set. He's facing away from me so I can't see his grimace, but he's leaning on the counter looking out the window. I can see he's very tense and upset.
"Tyler, who was it ?"I ask genially. He doesn't answer, just flicker his hand in the air as if to shoo me off. wellspring, whatever with him. I have school to get to. I pull on my preferred sweatshirt and hastiness to gain some pledge. schoolhouse starts at 8:30 and it's 8:00 now, so I don't have long to eat and run to the bus stop.
I finish my breakfast and snatch up my backpack onto my shoulder. John Tyler has shifted position, but he's still staring out the window. From my side at the door, I can just see the side of his face. He's frowning and muttering softly to himself. I hope he's not too hurt if it was Rosa. I slip out the room access and pause on the doorstep. We rent an apartment, which is weird since it's a ground level, single-person home not connected to any former flat. We live in southern capital of Georgia, GA in a little developing sort of. But it's a bunch of little flat family owned by some rich guy named Richard Blanc. He came up with the idea of flat household in a piffling growing and it's surprising how many people actually rented here. The whole ontogeny is always filled, whether it's people who live here, or citizenry passing through.
I run down the winding street between theater, then I decide to sleep with that and cut across backyards. I slow to a walk once I reach the bottom of the developing and hit the pavement on Main Street. The first light air is sharp and chilly, which I hate. It's supposed to be warm down here in Georgia, but recently it hasn't been. Probably a result of the recent hurricanes that passed along the coast and stirred up funny weather. I shove my work force in my pockets, feeling a suddenly conversant spell of paper. Pulling it out I recognize the earphone number of Jay Royce. Of grade, trade good thing I didn't lose it…although it really wouldn't have been my red. I still don't get why bad boy senior Jay would be so interested in me. If he thought he liked me, that wouldn't make any sense because he could have any senior in school. I'm only in my Sophomore year.
I see the bus stop ahead and lightly jog to it. A belittled group of freshmen are chattering beside the sign, so I sit down on the work bench and relax. It's the first time in a while that I've been able to reach the bus stop this early and chill out. I'm usually rushing or I'll have to ask Ty to take me to schooltime. I really hope the completely empty-locker empty-head thing has worn off by now. I was so late yesterday and to top it off I had forgotten my backpack. Not a individual scholar, not even my former friend Mia Theodore Samuel Williams, let me forget it all day. I wish I had a cell speech sound or even a watch to see what fourth dimension it was, but sadly I am cut scant of those matter. It's not a necessity, I can hold out without it, but it's convenient. Tyler makes all the money ( which isn't much ) and we limit ourselves to the requisite. Although somehow he grants himself an iPhone and unlimited talk/text.
"demand any company ?"I recognize Jay's part instantly. I look up to see the handsome senior smiling down at me. He steps past me and sits down on the workbench beside me."You're here early,"he adds.
"Yeah, I have fourth dimension to decompress for once,"I reply, shifting on the bench.
"Well, it's courteous to see a pretty cheek hanging out once in a while."I involuntarily smiling and see away up the street, hoping the bus is coming soon. I try not to feel it, but my belly gets fluttery. He's a senior, Natalie, and he does this to every lady friend. But the scolding in my mind does little to help. Suddenly I'm aware of Jay leaning closer to me.
"By the way, somehow I managed to never watch your epithet,"he chuckles to himself. I reluctantly and yet at the same time willingly turn my tending back to Jay.
"Natalie Kosher."I answer. He smiles and sits back.
"I'd introduce myself, but you know me. Or my public figure at least,"he states somewhat arrogantly.
"Who doesn't ?"I comment, seeing if I can get a reaction like he does. He actually looks at me, his verbal expression appearing somewhat surprise."What ?"I ask, wondering why I just said that. He's just looking at me, literally, in my eyes and he's expressionless former than the Sami surprised aspect."What ?"I ask again.
"I don't know."And he sits quietly, looking across the road. Great, Nat, just dandy. Now you've offended the guy or something. Why did you have to say that ? I look up the road, relieved to see the bus finally approaching. Then I feel a hand around my shoulder joint. Startled, I face Jay again and he's looking at me again and leaning slightly in.
"You know, Natalie Kosher, you're different from most girls I've talked to. We should hang out sometime, maybe you're something special,"he smiles, looking right into my eyes. And I melt away. It's like cipher I've ever felt before, I just get totally lost and before I know it he stands up and walks to the bound of the sidewalk. limited ? Really ? A fluttery hope starts in my stomach, but despite my try, I can not suppress it. The bus pulls up and Jay's the first one in. Then the newbie and I hurry over to the door. I hesitate before stepping inside. Can I really face the students ? Surely they'll still call me names and stuff. Maybe I should call Tyler to repel me to school.
"Get in, young woman !"the bus driver yells. Frank is a very heavy man with a mean, husky voice to agree his attitude. I swear he hates kids and yet here he sits. Forcing myself onto the bus, I slowly walk down the gangway. I look at the kids and immediately notice the indifferent, demeaning glance and the rustle. Then the terrible comment breaks the silence.
"Trying to survive down that airhead, blondie ?"somebody calls. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Now comments and gag are coming from all over the bus and there's no dodging. Dammit, I should have called Tyler ! I hurry towards the only empty stern near the back. As I approach, I see Jay watching me, taking in the offenses. His head word is cocked to the side, arms crossed like he's studying. I sit down uncomfortably and slide to the window where I lean my head against the class and stare out. This is my merely leakage. I daydream. On the bus, in family, in the hall, wherever I can to escape. But it's a 50/50 chance that it ever works. And today, nothing is being drowned out. Every threat and abuse is getting right to me, starting my school day day off in a downcast state. I can just see the backbone of Sammy's caput a few rows in front of me. She's looking down, shaking her point. And beside her is Mia Ted Williams, joining in the misuse and laughter. Today is going to be great.

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At lunch, I don't eat. I don't sit either. I stay in the hall on my own, hoping to be left alone. I managed to get my record in my storage locker and I decided that I'd hold them there from now on. Another incision was found dead center in my locker and a note had been slipped inside.

You ever get here earlier, be sure to hail with armour, bitch.
~ Alicia and Candy

Great, strong-arm threats too. I know they don't have anything against me, I'm just a very sluttish target and popular kidskin apparently find delight in beating on the insecure. Then an theme fanfare through my head. I could bet money and win that those older nipper are behind those buildings now, getting mellow and happy. I know what they are doing is bad, ugly in fact. But right now the mind of being carelessly happy is unbelievably appealing. And it's physically drawing me. I've stood up now and I'm looking down the anteroom in the direction of the rear exit. All I would own to do is slue out and see what's what. The outcome can possibly show in class ? Suddenly I realize I'm almost at the end of the hall. I've been involuntarily walking towards the loss and I can't stop.
I slip around the bottom of the student residence and stay at the book binding exit. The two-fold doors are the only if affair between me and an minute of felicity and utter contentment. I slide outdoor and pause in the grass. Fresh air hits me and a wave of nerves. certain enough, the work party of kids are behind the building. They are huddled together, giggling and leaning on each early. They're having so a lot fun and they don't give a red cent about the world. The same elderly that saw me in conclusion time expression and and apparent movement with his head for me to bring together. He knows why I'm here.
Shyly, I approach. I almost feel chagrined that I came to take part in such hysteric. Immediately the senior sports meeting me halfway and welcome me to the group.
"I'm Dylan,"he greets, shaking my shoulder joint gently and smiling into my oculus. I look down, but he lifts my mentum back up and brings me into the grouping."Everybody, we have a new friend."I'm about to object, but everybody in the group is smiling at me. The Jr red-head future to me wraps her arm over my shoulder.
"I'm Lonny ! Why don't you join us ?"she introduces, pointing around the lot."You've met Dylan and me, and then there's Tanya, Alex, Sasha, microphone, and Austin."I smile at each of them nervously."You're ?"
"Natalie,"I reply quietly. Dylan snap up my script and looks me in the eyes.
"Don't be shy, we all have the same story, don't we ?"he looks up around the group and everybody agrees with him. I fit right in. Everybody here knows and understands, why else would they be hanging together for the same intellect ? Then Lonny passes me a little baggy. And suddenly, there's no going back.

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The grouping disbands, going their sort ways, and I hurry back into the mansion to recover my onetime position. I'd gone through with it and boy was I so happy I did. Not long after, the upshot of the drug set in. I became utterly relaxed, the world slowed down, literally, and I felt unbelievably clear. I was completely well-chosen and subject matter to be exactly where I was and not do anything. I didn't caution if confect was threatening me, she'd never carry her threats out on me. I didn't care if Jay was hitting on me, I didn't care for any guy cable right now. I didn't care that I lived with my brother in an apartment, because right then, I was living with Dylan and Lonny and the rest of the ring.
But now, I could find the effect starting to wear upon off. I was feeling tired, weighed down, and unsettled. I even felt a tiny bit motion sick of if I moved too fast. I sat down against my cabinet and leaned my head in my articulatio genus, taking deep intimation. slump was setting in fast. I no longer felt felicitous or content. I didn't feel high and relaxed, I felt edgy, scared, and sad. I was bursting with emotions that gave me a splitting headache and made me feel like I just wanted to slumber and be left alone for my life. I was dimly unaware of students flooding back into the mansion. nonentity noticed the state I was in, they simply noticed that I was in the way so they had no qualms about kicking and stepping on me. But I couldn't get up.
The class bell rang and I had to slowly stand up. The halls were emptying and the overwhelm noise had died down. I fumbled with my locker code, then struggled to recollect which course of study was succeeding. I grabbed my math rule book and slammed my locker shut. Another headache set in and I leaned back to breathe. It left that quickly and I was capable to shed light on up my idea as best I could. I was in control of my body again and my mind was focusing. I hurried to class…English class. And it was too late to fix my new dilemma.
Yeah, my new sobriquet were"Blondie ”,"airhead ”, and the latest,"math flake ”. Showing up to English with a maths Holy Scripture was the biggest mistake of the century and I was given no slack. mathematics class went alright considering Mr. Prince Edward tolerates no horseshit in division. I left hurriedly, returning my Quran to my cabinet and running habitation, skipping the bus. Tyler was nowhere to be found, so I escorted myself to the chamber and fell asleep.

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The succeeding week went this way. Every lunch geological period I would slip one's mind out-of-door and bring together my gang where we would get hold of an hour to be well-chosen and luxuriously. I learned how to deal with the after effects of the drug and was soon able to make do the wearing-off side-effects and exonerate up my head twice as fast. I took my abuse from the students without retaliating or obsessing over it and simply avoided my locker if I arrived early. Needless to say, my cabinet suffered quite a bit of impairment, but the whorl held out. I even started hanging with the work party after schooling for a piffling bit since I was always absent from the bus. The only downfall was Sammy's ceaseless questioning. She could evidence something was different and I had to come up with excuse every day. I even started writing down ideas in the daybreak. I made sure to be at the bus stop early to sing to Jay, who was oddly occupy in everything about me and we hung out in the hall a lot lately. Today, I was especially upbeat, knowing I'd manage to get through it.
But as soon as I reached my locker, that sunshine vanished. There stomach Alicia and confect, waiting for me. I slowed my walk, but it was too late. They'd seen me.
"You stuck up bitch !"Alicia lashes out. I step up to my locker and face her, hoping I can let this abuse go like I do every early day.
"What did I do ?"I ask coolly.
"You walk around like you're floating through the swarm. I know you do drugs, that's how come you disappear so often !"she snaps. I go coldness, fear rushing through me.
"I'm gon na have your bathroom passing play confiscated,"she snarls. Then I almost laugh out loud. I would have had Candy not been there.
"You think I'm sniffing in the bathrooms ?"I blurt, struggling not to laugh.
"She's too a good deal of a blonde to have intercourse how that even works, there's no evidence, Alicia."candy snickers, not caring to accuse me of drug use. But that blonde input for some reason irks me. Usually I brush off those comments, but lately all this blonde shit was getting to me.
"What did you say ?"I demand, speaking out of irritation. Unfortunately, I need to reign in this new found humour of mine. Candy slams me against the cabinet, causing a loud crash to echo through the halls.
"I can say whatever I want, squawk !"she snaps."Where's your boyfriend to save you now ?"Everybody had noticed how I was hanging out with Jay Royce. They'd seen me talking to him at the bus blockage and in the hall sometimes. And to my hazard, nobody ever picked on me when he was around. But until now, nobody had ever said anything. But for some intellect, I'm not able to let this go. I raise my arm and swing around, slamming my fist into candy's face. She stumbles back and yelps in surprise. cipher would have expected something like that from me and cold fearfulness shoots through me because I know what I've just done. I see Bob Dylan watching me over Candy's shoulder. He nods, looking me in the optic with understanding. What did that mean ? But then he was gone, apparently predicting what would happen next. Because Candy looks at me and doesn't hesitate. She flies into me, slamming her fists into my stomach hundreds of multiplication. I can't breathe, pain shocking through me and I double over. Candy lands various gust directly to my head word, knocking me to the terra firma. I gasp, but no air comes. I curl up on the floor, screaming but no sound coming out. Candy kicks me in the back repeatedly and then it's over. The world spins and darkens until I am blind by my pain in the neck. I can't breathe and I feel I will suffocate. Surely I would fall out out and die from lack of oxygen. It's as bad as sticking your head in a plastic bag. What you have in you is all you get. And I go out cold.

………………………………………………………..

I open my eyes to see Dylan searching my face. His brown eyes are darkened with trouble. I'm sitting up against the lockers, Lonny's there too.
"Nat ? Nat, wake up,"Bob Dylan encourages. I'm fully awake and fully cognisant of everything. Including the paralyzing pain sensation still quaking through my dead body. I have a splitting headache and smell like I'll be grisly. I look back into his optic with the question I can't get to come out.
"It was the drugs that lashed out,"he explains to me.
"But I didn't even…"I trail off as another wave of nausea rushes through me.
"You don't have to. It's a side result we've all suffered with. You have to be especially on your toes with that one,"Lonny replies. I sigh and close my middle. Dylan's hands are still on my shoulders, gently rubbing the tensity away. I'm grateful for that.
"Don't to your stratum. At to the lowest degree not until after lunch. We'll stay with you if you want,"Bob Dylan instructs me. I'm still trying to regain some controller of myself. I open my center again and allow my foreland to slowly clear.
"Lonny, I'll stay. You go to your social class. You don't need another quotation,"he parliamentary procedure. Lonny gives me a sympathetic grin and hurries down the mansion house. Bob Dylan sits down succeeding to me, his shoulders against mine, and sighs."You fine then ?"he asks. I nod, regretting the drift immediately as a heavy dizzy spell spins the domain around me. I lean my head on his berm and close my eyes. Then something occurs to me.
"You don't mind me doing this, do you ?"I ask, hoping he doesn't find it weird.
"No, of course not. You're not the offset to need support,"he answers."Lonny and I have both been beat up because of lashing out. It's the only side of meat upshot that stays with you even when you don't take it. judge it's just because it's worked into your organisation. But no joining us today, no matter how bad it feels. You'll make yourself violently sick…"and Bob Dylan's off just talking with advice and the stories of each of the gang members. I think I fell asleep at some point, because the succeeding time I open my eyes he's asleep too and I feel much better. My head is light and the pain has receded to a low throbbing.
Dylan awakes and check mark on me, asking how I feel. By lunch prison term, my promontory is completely pass and I am able to get up and walk around as long as I am slow and careful. Dylan even sits with me at lunch, but I can tell he is feeling the effects of missing the gang. Both of us are drowning in depression, unable to eat barely anything, but we force it because our eubstance need it. Then we depart to year, walking as if in a daydream of depression.

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I hesitate at the bus stop. There is no way I am walking habitation, not in the body politic I am in. But there is no riding the bus with the way my temper is out of control condition. Yet I have no other alternative. Suddenly, I'm aware of Jay beside me. He wraps an arm over my shoulders and smile. Looking into his eyes, I feel a slight safer.
"I know what you're thought process. I can tender you a ride household ?"he says in his deep, aphrodisiacal voice, holding up his car keys. Relief floods through me, all sound judgment gone because I know this is the best pick. I follow Jay to his car, an older Dodge charger. The blue paint is scratched and some is scraped off, but inside, the leather seats are unbelievably mild and welcoming. Jay turns the ignition and pulls out of the shoal parking lot.
"schooling didn't go so well ?"Jay asks. He knows the story, but he wants to make conversation.
"No."I reply simply. I don't want to think about it. I don't want to remember at all. We're silent for a bit.
"Listen, um…maybe…I don't know you're schedule and all…"Jay starts. I glance at him uncertainly. He's focused on the route, both hands gripping the steering cycle. He glances at me then back at the route."I was thinking maybe we could hang out sometime. You know, not at school ?"he suggests. My heart leaps at the thought, but I remind myself he didn't ask me on a engagement. It was just a hang out. Probably with some other friends.
"Well, I usually just stay at home after schoolhouse. I've never really done anything on weekends though except with Sammy."Suddenly Sam jumps into my head and I realize I never did ask her how her mom's birthday went. I feel bad. I haven't really pass any prison term with Sam recently.
"wellspring, we'll have to do something then,"Jay nation, interrupting my thoughts."You still take my number ?"
"Yeah, I do."Involuntarily my hand glide into my sweater pouch for the report. All too soon I see our developing coming up. Jay lilt the Challenger up the route and I direct him to the apartment. He stops the car at the Curb and sits there. We're silent. I'm looking out the window, kind of staring at nothing. Then I feel a script on my thigh. surprise, I look quickly at Jay. He's looking bass into my eyes thoughtfully.
"Natalie, when I say ‘ bent out ’, I guess I really meant I'd like to learn you out sometime,"he says softly. My pulse leaps and I hope he doesn't finger the little shiver that runs through my body. If he did, he gave no sign.
"I don't know, I mean…"I trail off, not knowing what to say.
"expression, I've never met a young lady like you and…it would just be like a moving picture or something. I didn't really plan the whole thing."He's waiting for my answer. This is one of the times I wish I had my own cell speech sound. Then I wouldn't have to use the stupid land line for stuff like this. I'm not in control when I answer.
"Sure, I'd love to,"I say without thinking. I didn't even attain the words come out and immediately I feel a thrill of nerves. I'm not trusted if it's estimable or bad. Jay grinning and gently hug my thigh. Then he climbs out of the car and gets the room access for me. I step out and thank him for driving me house. Then, clutching the composition with his figure, I hurry into the house.

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Part III coming soon ! ! !