As I visited with my first cousin, a man as perverted as myself, he asked me,"What's the weirdest thing you ever had your dick stuck in ?"
Immediately, I remembered the incest with my babe ; jacking off with a variety of things wrapped around my lance ; a dyad of Capricorn, which fit my rooster about the Saami as my rigorous pussy sister-in-law ; and…. The cantaloupe.

Leo already knew about the incest with Mae and Jody ... he was the one who started it all. We took turns with Mae many times, but I don't she ever let Leo get into her pantie. I got there… but that 's not what this story is about.

As we grew up, Leo and I often compared the sizing of our growing shaft, and would make a wash to see who could cum first when we 'd beat our sum. We'd try out jacking our retinal rod with rolls of throne paper ; with the cardboard snapper pulled out. credit card suitcase with lotion in them, then wrapped by a flannel worked neat. There's no telling how many of our pop'condoms we slipped on to jack up off ; and we always compared the results… but that 's not what this tale is about.

I did n't love the goats until after I was married, and tried it just for the hell of it. I'd pinch an opportunity when the bride would be gone shopping or to one of the kid's theatre and mind for the laughingstock shed. It did n't postulate foresightful to train Pearl and Polly to stomach and eat from the provender bucket while I used their pocket-sized pussies for my pleasure. I don't keep my sexual experiences a hidden from Leo, so he knows about the nannies, too… but that 's not what this story is about.

Leo knows I 'm still pounding my sister-in-law 's catch every chance I get. She 's had all three of her shaver by C-section ; so her pelvis has never been forced by delivering a baby. Plus, she can work her wonderful slit muscle like nigh men have never experienced. She 14years younger than me and her hubby is a rotted son-of-a-bitch. I really think she's in making love with me and would go away his sorry ass in a 2d, if I was unfreeze and available… but that 's not what this story is about, so ... ....

I began by telling Leo about my buddy, Paul….
We started the foremost degree together and graduated side by slope. We both had older sidekick, so we weren't too surprise when we discovered how swell it felt to jack up off, and we did that ( slope by side ) for years. Who really knows ; if Alice Paul was still alive, we may still be doing it together.
Alice Paul's dick was svelte than mine and had a slight, upward curve. Mine was fatter, but about the same length.

Somewhere along the line, after Leo had explained the birds and bees to Mae and me, Paul and I made her short pussy the target of our pleasure. Eventually, big sis joined in, too.

During high school, both of us snagged girlfriends that didn't hesitate to make out ; quite often we would fill up both behind in Paul's old Ford with naked bodies, but they wouldn't work a trade with their good. My Sharon was dandy, but I always wanted to plow Agatha Christie's pussy, too.

My car was too small for the four of us, but Sharon learned how to close down up her skinny, piddling fundament and give me a howling blow job, when it was just the two of us.

Saint Paul's mom moved to another Town when we were in our aged year. His older pal, Jerry, had already spent meter in the U. S. Army and had his own apartment, so Saint Paul moved in with him to end up his fourth-year year. He remained there after commencement, until he and Agatha Christie got married.
Anyway, moving in with Hun had another definite advantage…It didn't take long to convince the missy that a bed worked adept than a car seat.

So it happened that our gal got summer Book of Job as counselors at a church building camp about forty stat mi away from dwelling house. They were able-bodied to come household on weekends, but Jerry and his girlfriend had the apartment, so Paul and I were banished on Saturday and Sunday. Those seats in the old President Ford got a commodity workout on Saturday nighttime and Sunday afternoons.

Now, I'm not gon na say that we were entirely celibate while the female child were gone, but sometimes, good pussy with a trusty back talk was hard to detect.
One evening during the hebdomad, Paul made a comment,"I'm so Goddamn horny I could have it off a watermelon."
I laughed, but got to thinking… all we had done for the close respective months was fuck some substantial pussies,"You're one looney mother fucker, Alice Paul. But let's go for a ride."

I knew of a magnanimous, commercial-grade garden just outside of town. I stopped my VW mallet just long enough for us to skip over out and take hold of three cantaloupes, each. Paul wanted to know why we were stealing the melons and I told him,"We got ta shag something tonight."

We only took the two ripest unity ino the flat. It would still be three or four hr before Jerry would get off employment, so I took a knife and barely cut through the outer rind. When the 3inch R-2 came off, I plunged the knife into the nitty-gritty and twisted it around, making a hole about a one-half inch across. It was easily reamed out with my thumb, to the size pickle my strong stopcock would fit through.

Paul laughed as he watched, but when I pushed ol'Fat Boy through, and down into the warm ejaculate cavity, he started working on the other cantaloupe. Before recollective, both of us were acting like those two elementary school boys who used to hide behind the dumpster ; and see who could germinate our wad the highest.

It was sloppy and made a slew, but I finally emptied my shipment inside. Paul got so titillate that he couldn't dump his spermatozoon in his melon vine, so he pulled his slimy rod out and finished by hand.
We were cleaning up the kitchen story and about to wash our cocks and testicle, when Paul burst with laughter,"I'm gon na peel this piece of ass cantaloupe, cut it up in chunks, and put it in the fridge. Hun's been a son-of-a-bitch lately and he's gon na love eating what I just fucked."

fountainhead, we cleaned both of the yield, put them in to cool, and left.
Sure enough, after we had our transonic Warren E. Burger and fries, we went back to the flat to find Jerry & his asshole brother, Prince Charles, watching TV and eating chilled cantaloupe.
We quickly said,"Hi,"and excused ourselves back outside… God it was funny.

To this day, anytime Paul and I get together, we have a big chortle about fucking Cucumis melo cantalupensis and feeding them to his brother.
He'll kill us if he ever finds out .