The Upper Floof



I was minding my own business in my club, on the speed floor you understand, the one reserved for gentlemen. I was relaxing after dinner, reading the eventide paper. Whiling away the sentence until supper, It was the year the Titanic sank, 1912.

Leather chairs and oak venire, the smell of tobacco heavy on the air, talk of the town of the Kaiser and of impending war were rife around the tabular array as our hostesses catered to our every need.

Milly, molly, Moira, genus Melissa, The Virgin, their names all started with an M. They looked quite coy despite uniforms cut to assure their good luck charm were always displayed. Neatly corseted waists with their breasts upthrust yet bared and unrestrained. Tight black jackets with silver push cut to slew under their pouting mammaries. The area below their waistline entirely bare but for the tapeline holding their stockings. Their easygoing downy Pubes neatly trimmed or shaved.

Au Nipple and clit ring twinkled in the firelight. Pisces the Fishes net stocking with wrinkle arrow straight set off pale elegant thighs and calves while their painted toe nails peeped from elegant high up heeled brake shoe. Neat little rabbits tails attached to little ballyhoo pressed firmly up their miserly bottoms and all set off by jaunty piffling hat with necklaces ring and earrings dripping with gem. And all ready to perform each and any service we may require.

The flotsam and jetsom of the sewer attired like princesses.

Their services were provided all inclusive to the membership of the upper floor of the club. Mouth, back passage and womb alike available to any fellow member's member and all bar oral cavity uncommitted to a members finger or tongue though of course display of tenderness such as kissing upon the sassing were not allowed

They worked in electrical relay, obviously Milly molly et al were not their real names, but we no more cared who they were than they cared who we were. A crooked finger, a motion and they would saunter across and if indicated would straddle us and simply sink down upon our phallus. Or suck a limp snake to rigidity, or fetch an ice inhuman beer or liqueuras our impulse dictated..

Sometimes they got it wrong, one elderly gentleman admitting,"Ye divinity I only wanted a whiskey,"as Malia extracted his member from his fly and began to suck.

But enough ground detail, back to this most particular evening.


"Oldbury, where are you ?"one of my Oncorhynchus keta asked.

"Here ? Why ?"I replied.

"Need another damned tomfool to play cards,"he said drunkenly.

"At your service,"I agreed and taking my whisky I dutifully went across and sat at the table.

The game was poker, night club rules, sensation High.

Millie the croupier smiled, as she waited to dish out the wag. Her left over pollex rested within the folds of her quim pleasuring herself as all the young woman were instructed to do while idling. Her bared breasts with halcyon halo swung alluringly to and fro as she rocked gently to her own speech rhythm as she quietly drifted into a world of her own as she frigged herself towards orgasm.

"shift's in a place of bother,"Simmonds gloated.

"Bet his damned household and lost !"Carter laughed.

"And ?"I enquired.

"I don't need a blame house,"Clearwater sighed,"Bit of a sod really."

"So lets us get this straightaway, you won Teddy's star sign and don't want it ?"I queried.

"Absolutely, rotting pile,"he agreed.

"So give it back,"I suggested.

"Not that comfortable old sidekick, Club rules."Simmonds pointed out,"Needs outside player to win it then Teddy can win it back do you see ?"

"You're a bloody fool Teddy,"I said, as looked at the broken eggshell of a man that fifty yr of idleness drink and gaming had created."stack me in."

Teddy, 4th Earl of Latchmere, master GlenAvon and respective early titles was several social classes above my lowly post yet many chiliad of Guinea poorer.

I may experience been brought up as the local parson's son but t'was well known I was the Lord of the manor's bastard and had his cunning and line acumen. As well as a talent for cards.

I looked at my cards.

"I'll bet two shillings,"Clearwater said throwing Teddy's billet for the theater on the table.

"I'll acclivity all in,"I said and Clearwater folded.

I took the note.

"Thank God !"Teddy sighed.

"Not so fast,"I insisted,"I fear you need to con a lesson, what collateral shall you offer ?"

Teddy looked aghast,"I have none."

"Three unmarried girl,"Simmonds laughed.

"Very well offer one as your stake,"I insisted.

"Good god man, don't be an oaf,"Teddy snapped.

"well sir I am a bastard by nascency, though hardly an oaf,"I suggested,"Which child shall you proffer ?"

"Oh very well Hilary my youngest."he agreed reluctantly and somewhat drunkenly.

"The one maudlin who never smiles,"Clearwater enquired.

"Maybe old Oldbury here will bed a smile into her !"Simmonds laughed.

"Hardly, I shall betray to Madame to defray my expenses,"I explained.

"bit my daughter into a lady of pleasure. Never !"teddy bear protested.

"Well I shall earmark ten 24-hour interval to renounce the house."I offered.

"Now don't be precipitous, Oldbury,"Clearwater interjected,"Don't be an oaf just fold."

"No slip needs a lesson,"I insisted,"I'll central my sign for the girl whom I shall sell to madame as a whore."

"Done !"grinned shift,"Never has a man made such a poor bargain !"

I went back to my chair a job well done and a example learned.

Clearwater sought me out,"teddy rigged you,"he confided,"That girl, Hilary, have you met her ? She came out, what, two year ago, not so lots as a dance let alone a dallience, tis said she sips at the spring of Lesvos, and I truly believe far from paying for her charms you would have to pay any self respecting fellow to fuck her,"

"I just wanted to teach the old fool a lesson, '' I explained,"If this so called girlfriend is indeed nineteen summers gone then I'll just let the matter quietly drop curtain, have a few whiskey and bury it. ``

But I had not reckoned with the redoubtable fille Hilary.

She came to my house at noon, I was still in my pajama working at my desk.

Madonna my maid came to essay me,"There's some woman downstairs who reckons she's your whore."

"What ?"I demanded.

"Hilary something or other."Blessed Virgin suggested and the said Hilary fit upon us.

"Father says he sold me to you as your plaything,"she insisted as she stormed into the room.

I stared, she was as far from a whore as one could reasonably get in a female person. I would avow she was sassy from forking the dung from the gymnastic horse stand. Her hair was a mess where it spewed out from her riding hat, her clothes a filthy brownness coat and sputter tight riding britches. Her face screwed with anger and hatred.

"No,"I corrected her."As a whore, a chattel to be used and abused by any as desires it for a low fee,"

"What !"she snapped.

"A prostitute to be available to any gentleman who desires her,"I insisted."That was our agreement. Though desirous gentlemen may be just as your countenance would scare a unanimous tribe of Zulus let alone a shy cultured gentleman."

"Ha, so no to a greater extent of this gimcrackery,"she snorted,"I submit to no man."

"Submit to none indeed,"I surmised,"I would propose that on the contrary you are in urgent, nay contiguous need of a sound pronging."

"Well sir it shall not be from you."she snapped.

"Madam a yard guineas would not induce me to prong you,"I said flippantly.

"Good, we are agreed,"she agreed.

"So I shall have to pay some street urchin or urchin to do the deed in my stead, more expense,"I said shaking my head in resignation.

She went to strike me. I caught her wrist an inch no more from her raking my face with her recollective filthy finger's breadth nails.

She stank of horse cavalry, a strangely earthy smell which raised queries in my loins.

"You madam require taming,"I insisted.

"Well it shall not be by you !"she snapped indignantly.

I thought a moment before I replied."Disrobe this blink of an eye or state your founder to resign my household forthwith."

"No you can not !"she replied in horror.

"Submit or the agreement is void !"I challenged.

She stared at me. She shuddered as she realised my resolve.

"Very well,"she said icily and she slipped off her arduous coat.

I hung it on the binding of a chairman for her as she tentatively undid one of the buttons on her bodice, than a second.

Her fingerbreadth trembled, with fearfulness or anger I knew or cared not. The buttons parted and the bodice swelled. Clearly her mounds were much constricted. It caught my care. My member stirred again.

"Quite delightful allow me,"I said softly as I helped to free her hillock and cupped them in my hands,"It must be such a relief for them to scarper their bonds."

"No !"she said all-inclusive eyed but I knew in that flash that she was ripe for the taking. Her teats stiffened and extended.

"cocotte's mounds are ever freed, shall you like that ?"I asked.

"No !"she snapped though her resolve was uncertain.

"swing as spare as the razzing. And their cunt, open at all times or plugged with thumb or dildo,"I said in a hoarse menacing rustle."uncommitted to all."

"Do not piddle with me !"she said.

Madonna my maiden looked on disapprovingly, she was no dish, well past child bearing age but she had a pleasant enough ass to fuck when naught else was offered.

"shears Mary, let us skin the rabbit."Mary obediently fetched the large scissors or small shears from the drawer in the side of meat table.

I made an surgical incision into the leggings half way up Hilary's thigh and started to cut away the coverings. She near froze in fear. A 1 cut up one leg round the crotch and down the former. Then a one curving cut upwards towards the waist and back down revealing her underwear as the fluttering of fabric fell away.
Three Sir Thomas More snips from the razor sharp blades and the underthings came away and revealed a quite a little of hirsute moist Robert F. Curl and beneath a hairy moistened twat. My extremity showed a distinct pursuit and he uncurled uncomfortably within the constriction of me breeches.

"Do you know I think I will fuck you after all."I declared."Mary loosen my bang and humbled my knee pants if you please."

Mary reluctantly lowered my knickerbockers and underthings allowing my fellow member to stiffen and straighten as I pushed Hilary against the table.

"Guide my member in The Virgin if you please."I requested.

"It ent fair, she don't want none and gets fucked and I wants it and don't get none,"Mary muttered as she obediently guided my stiffening fellow member towards Hilary's pouting quim.

"Later,"I suggested as my member gently parted Hilary's pouting cunt lips.

"No !"she said but he torso said"Yes yes yes,"such was her indigence for cock and turncock juice.

I felt no resistance from her virginal membrane, but there were stripe of red afterward so I presume she had been virgo intacta and I enjoyed a distinctly mediocre gallop though at an unexpected prison term of day, finishing with a flourish or at least nine right squirt of fair low Born cock juice in her blue vagina.

"Mary for Supreme Being sake bathe this urchin before we take her to Madame."I ordered as I withdrew.

"What about my part ?"she protested.

"I am afraid you will make to use the rolling pin,"I suggested,"But this time wash it before rolling out the pastry."

She blushed ruby,"Very well sir."she agreed.

"Or perhaps you could ingest this whore learn how to use her fist ?"I suggested with a wink.

Hilary jerked back to reality, her body may have swum with excitement but now she faced reality, instead of erotic love she had been fucked as a qualifying time. I had no more desire for her to drop my offspring than I had to dance the Viennese waltz stark naked at the gates to Buckingham Palace while they changed the precaution. I had used her no more. And she had used me.

"Go, get washed,"I said,"I have work to do."

I found Hilary and Mary an hour or so later. The tin bath was upended on the kitchen floor.
Bathwater bed covering across the floor towards the drain. Hilary lay naked on the flagstones as she suckled Mary's massive teats and rhythmically pressed her clenched fist into Marys twisty slit. Mary only ever wore a uncomplicated smock and she too was near naked as her smock was largely around her neck.

"I shall burn these rags,"I said as I scooped up Hilary's clothes, but she and Madonna were too absorbed with each other to notice.

Brabbinger my Ostler coughed. He had been watching from the phantasma."The young lady's horse sir ?"he queried.

"She's no Lady, she's a base whore,"I replied as I watched Hilary pleasuring Mary,"Shall you take a jab ?"

"No thank you kindly sir,"he said diffidently."I got my pride sir."

"Well I just poked her,"I said,"overlord knows why."

"Wiles they has sir, reels you in like,"he says,"Me I likes horses."

Images raced through my mind,"Quite so."I agreed,"feed and body of water the horse would you, no send countersign to my club, have a consistent sent and a sympathizer, take the whore's horse."I laughed at my own relapse into poetry,"whore's sawhorse"indeed.

There is only a finite clock time one can watch women pleasuring each other especially unattractive 1, so after no more than seven proceedings, dozen at the away, I went about my business.

Brabbinger returned within the half hour with Miss Middleton, one of Madame's dressing table, a weasel faced flavorless chested crone of around thirty five summer and XXX thousand men, a street whore with agile digit an eye for beauty and a gift for fitting stays, stockings shoes and keister ballyhoo as well as the artists touch which with rouge and pulverization turns the tiresome scullery maid or fat cook into an objective of desire.

"Oh my lord, you want a miracle actor and thats a fact,"Middleton said as she saw Hilary embraced in Mary's well muscled arms.

"lupus erythematosus of your impertinence, bend over I wish to fuck you,"I averred.

"Not if you been fucking that you ent, I got my superbia,"Middleton said icily.

She set down her bag and took out a tub of butter. Greasing her fingerbreadth and hitchhike she advanced upon Hilary even as she continued to pleasure Virgin Mary and grasped her firmly, one thumb pressed firmly up Hilary's back passage and the finger into her quim.

"Ooh,"Hilary gasped.

"I reckon a two inch up her ass and a three up her quim,"Thomas Middleton opined as she withdrew her finger's breadth and wiped them on a cloth,"Twenty three column inch waist, its like making a silk wedding wearing apparel out of a bull ass,"she said sadly.

"Have some decorum cleaning woman !"I snapped.

"wellspring you ain't no gentleman are you ?"she challenged.

I gave up and walked off.

An time of day later and Thomas Middleton sought me out,"I done me topper,"she said.

Hilary appeared,"My god she looks almost homo,"I agreed,"What say you Brabbinger ?"

My Ostler was lurking in the tincture as always. Feasting his eyes on Hilary's now ringed clit and shaved pubis now framed by stocking magnetic tape and her resound teats now upthrust by a pie-eyed black corset.

"Don't mind if I do sir,"he said as he swept from the shadows.

He strode up to the fille and raised his smock revealing brusk fat hairy leg and a long fat hairy prong, I'll wager there was more pilus on his egg than on a Rabbi's chin.

I only wanted his agreement that she looked desirable butbhe obviously decided to misunderstand me and to try her charms instead.

He grasped her firmly and in a blink of an eye was Hilary pushed against the subject table and he sank his prong within her easygoing moist quim. His haired ass bobbled up and down and in and out as he thrust his monster forcibly into her womb.

She barely protested. Her constituent were aroused by the rings and the potions applied to her innards by Middleton's quick fingers.

"Oh my Godhead !"she wailed,"I am in paradise !"

Now to be quite honest there is little as dis spiriting as finding one's handmaiden has a prong unquestionably superordinate to one's own both in distance and girth and vim, and I turned on my bounder and strode away after no more than ten mo at the outside.

The way he kneaded her breasts and crushed her mouth with his lips was quite lewd, while the way she raked his back with her nails was quite uncalled for and the oink and protest of passion was such to reach me nauseous.

Finally as I departed he grunted like a pig and clearly shot his bolt.

"Well done !"Middleton shouted,"assassinator, who knows we may take Madame proud of you yet !"

I sat a while and returned to find Hilary attired in a cloak. which hid her voice. I saw she walked awkwardly.

"Finished already ?"I asked Middleton.

"Yes sir, Got her holes plugged and everything."she replied.

"show me."I insisted.

"No !"Hilary snapped,"You don't own me."

"appearance the valet,"Middleton insisted.

Hilary reluctantly raised the cloak showing a stout leather strap secured around her crotch which clearly held quim and anal fire hydrant in place.

"Open her up I wish to sample her,"I ordered.

"Not now after I perfumed and plugged her and everything,"Middleton argued."You had every opportunity sir and if you desire you can make love her to your pump depicted object this eve but for now I must extradite her to Madame before my special gentleman arrives."

"Special gentleman ?"I queried.

"Has me piss on him,"she said proudly, and seeing my discomfiture she added"well you did ask."

"Oh be gone,"I sighed.

I followed along to the Club later, after fending off Cooks'suggestions that her ass was as tight as anyone's cunt, something demonstrably untrue, and by dinner fourth dimension I was gorging myself on salt pork and Allium cepa washed down by some of the fine wine from the Antipodes.

Hilary was nowhere to be seen when I arrived. It seemed she had become something of a celebrity and every valet seemingly had plan on poking her quim.

I decided they could get on with it and settled down to eat my fill.

However seeing Lord Glenavon, Hilary's father arrive rather the worse for potable gave me an evil whimsey which I proceeded to put in train.

"teddy bear won't you join me ?"I asked as he staggered by,"Need a third for a threesome, new cyprian penury breaking in don't cha know."


"What ho, yes rather, three way eh, top hole."he stammered out his usual cosmic string of cliches and sat down at my mesa. Milly molly or some such brought Teddy a platter of pork and he began to guzzle on it greedily.

Hilary had seemingly metamorphosed into Melissa, a bright red ball gag now flilled her mouth, a brighten sign of what we called a screamer. A prostitute who could not prevent herself vocalising her enjoyment.

I sought out Madame. I swiftly arranged to use Hilary/Melissa as soon as she became available.

teddy was about to set about on his apple pie when Madame brought Hilary over.

He barely showed any interest but ordered."Capital, just range me wench and let me ease your quim while I eat my pud there's a dear."He unbuttoned his breeches and extracted his rather woebegone tired and uninterested pecker from therein.

It sprawled almost lifeless along his belly but it reared soon enough as Hilary straddled him and sank down until her cushy pink quim rested gently upon his length.

It reared like an Indian snake smoothie's snake, a veritable python. Spearing upward towards her entrails. It seemed quite outlandish. Teddy about to be intimate his own girl unknowingly.

He reached down and aimed his turncock between the back talk of her quim. She raised herself then sank down with a contented sigh and a slight drip from her ball gag. Then she began to hump greedily.

shift laughed,"Bally gamekeeper, spitting look-alike of the sod, cuckolded d'ya see ?"He explained,"Never was me daughter, should receive fucked her long time ago."

I shook my head, I had been bamboozled again."Going to climb on ?"Teddy asked,"payoff the tradesman's, three way and all that ?"

"Ah no, I just remembered I have to see old Graithwaite about some business,"I said as Hilary bounced up and down far too energetically on her supposed father's dick and I left them to their joyous union.

I cursed, far from teaching Teddy a object lesson I had learned one myself. I rued my disconcertion and made my way homeward.

Cook hounded me once more seeking a pronging which I was not in any mood to provide so I retired to my bed somewhat disappointed and slept only fitfully.

The morning brought further tribulations.

Hilary's oldest sister. A weasel faced, wasp waisted spinner completely devoid of female appendages or so it seemed she arrived at some ungodly hour when no gentleman's gentleman or gentlewoman should be abroad and demanded to see me.

Cook relayed the information that she was downstairs. I looked at my watch."Ye gods its only ten of the clock !"I protested.

"Shall I send her up sir ?"Cook asked,"Or shall you sleep together my ass first ?"

"No, I think I can grapple without,"I answered,"I shall come down straightway."

"better put thee britches on first,"she laughed.

"No, damn it, I shall come as I am,"I insisted and down I went in my nightshirt to greet the woman.

"missy Latchmere ?"I queried.

"Rip van periwinkle I presume ?"she replied as she saw I wore only my nightshirt and night hat.

"And what brings you here ?"I asked.

"My buck,"she replied sarcastically,"But to be honest I wanted to see exactly what sorting of a fool my sire has been conniving with."

"And have you seen ?"I asked.

"Oh yes,"she replied,"You surpass my worst outlook by some considerable margin."

"rich person you merely come to insult me or had you some other role in mind ?"I asked.

"Actually,"she said,"I have, you humiliate my Church Father, prostitute my sister and ruin my probability of making a good marriage."

"You certainly have a bluntness of speech about you,"I admitted.

"And now having tricked me into your lair you ravish me,"she suggested.

"Madam I should sooner fornicate with a farmyard sow,"I insisted.

"So I understand,"she said,"But I do believe the constable will consider my tale when I scream and say how you tore my wearing apparel and sought to ravish me."

"Really ?"I queried as she tried in vain to tear her clothes."Allow me."

I grasped the shoulders of her dress and it ripped right down the front, I ripped aside the bindings of her mounds freeing them,"Remind me, did I enthral you or merely effort to ?"

"I care not, bring in me an offer or I go to the magistrate !"she snapped

"Twenty shilling for your accolade !"I offered.

"I meant man and wife,"she said,"love god are you really this stupid ?"

"Stupid yes desperate no,"I confirmed,"Though your pap are most alluring and are roused if I am not mistaken."

"You are mistaken,"she insisted.

"Your component are not moistened then ?"I queried.

"No more than than yours,"she quipped.

I looked down. My member was pressing my nightshirt out like a tent pole.

"I have not had my morning, ah."I said awkwardly.

"He fucks me ass mostly,"cook interjected.

"James Cook, '' I snapped"Go away !"

"Hilary said it was tiny,"young woman Latchmere observed,"But it looks monstrous !"

I sighed,"Shut your rattle and lay for me, then you can show up the magistrate your torn clothes and a good creaming within your parts."

"Very well, where is the bedchamber ?"she asked.

"Here on the level !"I insisted.

"No, bed me, if you want me bed me properly !"she insisted.

"Oh very well,"I sighed in exasperation and I swept her off her metrical unit and carried her upstairs.

How was I to know it was the most romantic gesture she had ever known ? The poor girl's quim was soaking with prediction and in a moment as soon as had bared it my prong had found a new home.

Her tight Virgo the Virgin cunt gripped my member."Make dearest to me !"she pleaded.

"This madam is merely a mere fuck,"I explained as I started to love her,"Though I own a very consonant one."

"Oh that makes me finger so nice,"she said and she smiled.

"Really ?"I queried,"Usually women ask if I have finished yet, or make water some sarcastic remark."

"No, its really nice, oh my god, its really nice."she said as the paries of her virgin cunt instinctively began to milk my cock.

It was all too much and suddenly a great torrent of germ shot from my loin and flooded her entirely.

I lay until I was spent and my fellow member shrank and them rolled onto my back."Do your bad,"I said and drifted into a content sleep.
"pack it in your hand like thus,"I heard James Cook saying as someone gripped my tool in their hired hand,"He ent much of a cocksman, one squirt wonder,"cook opined,"Still a bit of a suck will probably rouse him."

"What's up ?"I said.

"Damned constable thinks I'm my sister and that I'm a cyprian,"miss Latchmere explained.

"So you are trying conquest ?"I queried.

"In a news, yes."she agreed.

"You are an ageing weasel faced mat chested thread maker, why should I subscribe to note of you ?"I asked.

She thought a second"Because my firstborn boy child shall inherit father's deed of conveyance, should you not like your son to be the Earl Latchmere, the 5th Baron Latchmere ?"

"And ?"I queried.

She thought a moment."My baby is a lady of pleasure and she can pass on all manner of whorish john to hold on you satisfied in the bed chamber."

"Good head,"I agreed,"On your back I wish to bed you again."


To be continued.

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