antediluvian Rome, about 0 BC

"Oi Nozzer, what you at checkmate ?"Mark Marcus Antonius shouted above the clamour of a busy Rome morning.

"Off down the Colloseum Tone,"Nostradamous replied,"They got some new Gaulish Margaret Mead and a new lot of Angle slaves."

"sound good, I'll tell Julie,"Mark Anthony replied.

"Call me Julie again and your head teacher will join those of the Huns on the spindle above the city logic gate,"Julius Ceasar chipped in.

"All right keep your tip on,"Mark Susan Brownell Anthony replied,"Do you bet they got any virgins Nozzer ?"

"Six weeks in a boat with a bunch of aroused rower, I don't think so,"Nozzer replied,"More like Oars, anyway the came from what the Angle song"Es Sex"what ever that is."

"Right,"Mark Anthony agreed.

"Anyway I thought you had a steady bunk up with Cleo ?"Nozzer continued.

"Oh yeah, great, enceinte compexion, gravid in the sack but she bathes in domestic ass Milk River and foetor like a bloody donkey,"Mark Anthony replied.

"Can't have it all,"Nozzer laughed,"See you later right ?"

Nozzer called in on his Paraguay tea Michael Angelo on his way to the Colloseum,"Mikey how you doing pair ?"he called.

heights above the floor of the Sistine chapel Mikey was lying on a scaffold board having a kip and sleping off a heavy night on the mead and ale.

"Diminu - bloody - endo,"Mikey replied,"donjon the racket down. Me heads splitting mate."

"It's the paint checkmate, you want to use lead-in not cow dung,"Nozzer suggested,"Anyway it was only supposed to take a week, two coats of briliant white they said."

"Mate, they are paying by the day and they like my graffiti,"Mikey explained,"Money for old rope like."

"All right for some,"Nozzer replied,"You hear about Pisa pharos ?"

"Every fucking body heard about Pisa beacon light, started keeling over so they put a twisting in it,"Mikey sighed,"Just fuck off and do some Philosopherising or what ever it is you do."

"Charming,"Nozzer agreed,"Fuck you too."

The Colloseum was busybodied, every slit and his mate was there eyeing up the new slaves.

Some was naked, the slant and Gauls was so pale they needed browning up to be fanciable, but the Arabian had to be kept under natural covering or they blacked up, nigh was shackled together but some was in individual wooden cages.

"What's the detail of that ?"Nozzer asked some random bloke.

"From Greece, fucking Mytilene,"he said.

"From Lesvos or are they Lesbo's ?"Nozzer asked.

"Twat,"the bloke answered,"Anyway what can I do you for ?"

"Oh a nice bird, say XX one, blonde, big melons,"Nozzer replied.

"How much you got ?"the bloke queried.

"fifty, l five at a push,"Nozzer offered.

"Well you can make her,"he pointed to a beautiful Angle angel,"From Wessex, beautiful girl, shag like an angel,"he taunted,"For one time of day for fifty."

"I want's a planetary house striver,"Nozzer explained.

"For fucking fifty, you wan na get veridical mate,"the bloke replied,"You can have got her mum,"he said pointing to a crease old hag.

"Nah, rather fuck a camel,"Nozzer admitted.

"shuffle up yer thinker, bawd or scrubbing brush, cleaner."the bloke sighed exasperated.

"Bit of both,"Nozzer replied.

"That's a eff wife, don't go there mate they're trouble,"the bloke advised before he saw some other mug and fucked off to con him instead.

Nozzer wandered off,"Houseboy sir ?"some woman hollered, pointing at half a twelve nude feller tied up in a pen.

Nozzer looked up,"Hung like domestic ass,"she said.

"aspect like you been taking advantage,"Nozzer quipped.

"Every one-half minute, get and see the display,"she offered.

"For roll in the hay sake !"Nozzer sighed,"I ent fucking Greek !"

"No ?"says the char as she grabs the approximate slave's cock and starts wanking it,"You sure ?"

"Absolutely,"Nozzzer says.

"Then why you getting a hard on ?"she asked,"You want me to wank your piddling cock instead ?"she asked.

Nozzer looked down at his Toga, it was like a Tent pole was pushing it out,"shag !"he said out loud.

The woman suddenly left her slave and stuck her hired man up Nozzer's Toga. He wished he had put on clean knickers but they was in the wash so he had come out without any.

"Ooooh you are a big boy,"she cooed,"Five Sirstes to make you cum or I'll rip it out by the roots for free."

Nozzer liked it rough,"Rip it out by the roots,"he requested,"Please."

She dropped him like a blastoff,"Fuck off degenerate !"she said abruptly.

"Me a fucking perv ?"he snapped,"Its you what fucks slaves in populace ten times a day !"

"Twenty on a good day,"she smiled.

Nozzer shook his nous and went daily round to see the creature. Andreas the Lion Tamer was looking worried.

"Wazzup Andy,"Nozzer queried.

"ass Gallia bit Leo,"he said pointing to one of his Leo foundation,"Gone infected, look."

Nozzer was stupid but not stuid enough to get in a Lions cage to look at an infected fundament at Lion's dejeuner time, which was basically any fourth dimension a Lion wasn't actually a kip.

"Looks bad,"Nozzer agreed.

"Poor bugger's off his provender look."Andy qipped pointing at an old Phoenician couple liberally coated with love apple sauce cowering naked at the back of the cage.

"You'll have to get a new one I reckon,"Nozzer said unhelpfully.

"Oh great assistance,"Andy replied.

"What odds on him winning Fri ?"Nozzer asked.

Andy had a think and then said"If its Christians again it's a dead cert but Gauls, I reckon old Leo will run a bloody leage."

Nozzer nodded and went to mark out the Chariots for Saturday race. His mate Benner was working on his two horse chariot carefully adjusting the tracking by walloping the wooden axle as hard as he could with a huge mallet.

"Fucks sake Benner you'll bust it mate,"Nozzer cautioned

"I don't fucking aid if I do,"Benner cursed,"Fucking understeers on the ledger entry to Lesmo 1 then oversteers on way out."

"Too much fucking information,"Nozzer suggested,"See yah."

Nozzer was bored, he worked Night working out the future from the mavin, it wasn't a bad job, lie on the roof for a few moment a duad of multiplication a month and dream up some load of bolloks to tell the twats down the Senate. Writing it up was the spoiled, three gyre all the same for different departments. Anyroad it wash up Lion Taming and being a Gladiator.

He wandered up the temple of Vesta to have a bit of raillery with the"Vestal Virgins."

There was a bit of a kerfuffle. Some skirt was getting chucked out of a a position door. Nozzer recognised her, she used to survive near his gaff, her dad was summat in the Senate.

Nozzer wandered up to stick his schnoz in,"Analise ?"he queried.

"piece of tail off pervert,"she replied sharply, before she recognised him."Oh sorry, you're Michel de Notredame ain't you ?"

"Yes, call me Nozzer,"he replied helpfully.

"Bloody bitches have chucked me out, me dad will deliver a fit,"she stormed.

"But why ?"Nozzer asked.

"Do I have to draw a picture ?"she snapped,"They want Virgins."

"Oh,"Nozzer said awkwardly.

"I was having a crafty wank and got carried away,"she said.

"You are Analise ?"he enquired.

"Yes, sorry, they call me Swan Vesta in the temple, I thought you were after anal,"she replied.

"I shouldn't mind as it happens,"Nozzer replied.

"fountainhead block it,"she snapped,"Oh fuck now what do I do, Dad'll go mad."

"Lie low for a bit ?"Nozzer suggested,"You can kip round my gaff if you like."

"In your bed ?"she asked.

"If you like,"he smiled.

"And if I don't ?"she asked

"You can sleep on the floor after I fucked you ?"he ventured.

"Oh well beggars can't be choosers,"she said happily as she gathered up her meagre belongings,"booster cable on."

Nozzer was gob smacked, usually he paid a few Sirstes for a bunk up with a slave and got tod to do it off by gratuitous women but suddenly here was a raspberry what was up for it. He should have sensed a trap but his brain was definitely switched off and his bollocks firmly in control.

"Failed monthly inspection, said me Hymen was bust,"Analise explained,"Anyway what were you doing here ?"

"Bored, I was looking for theater slave to hold back the business firm clean and jerk and that."he explained.

"And that ?"she asked.

"That,"he agreed.

"strait like you need a wife,"she suggested.

"Right, so where do I find a wife ?"he asked.

"Are you blind or just stupid ?"Analise asked.

"Oh, look I didn't mean value,"Nozzer said.

"Yes of course I will !"Analise gasped and kissed Nozzer on the cheek.

Nozzer was shocked,"flavour"he said.

"Oh, lets get round off your berth and consumate it !"Analise taunted.

Nozzer warmed to the mind. Analise offered up a mum prayer, Nozzer wasn't the skilful snap but his bed musical rhythm sleeping on the cobblestones of the Autostrada.

In just a few minutes they were in Nozzer's gaff. Analise gritted her teeth and slipped off her toga.

"Do you wish what you see ?"she simpered.

"Uh ?"Hozzer replied but his turncock spoke for him.

"Oh you are a big boy,"Analise exclaimed as she saw the front of his toga boost propelled by his boss end, she had serious doubts that something that big would actually fit inside her.

She sat on the boundary of the table, spread her ramification, closed her eyes and dreamed some beautiful prizefighter was about to spear her.

"Oh Annie you're so beautiful,"he husked and kissed her forehead.

Her snatch began to feel moist. She kept her centre tightly closed so she didn't have to take care at Nozzer's ugly mug,"Do it !"she husked.

A searing pain wracked her mind as Nozzer brutally shoved his meat into her soft yielding kitty-cat,"Awww, that fucking trauma !"she railed.

"Tis done now my love,"Nozzer explained,"No more pain just pleasure."

"In your have sex aspiration mate you're tearing me in half !"she replied but the bother was subsiding.

Actually it was starting to experience quite prissy, Annie warmed to the idea, she opened her eyes, to be honest Nozzer didn't look quite as ugly, she could get used to this she decided.

"Oh that feels so squeamish,"she cooed.

"Not bad is it ?"Nozzer agreed and he promptly shot his load.

Annalise wasn't expecting it, what with never having it before and that. All that love juice shot up inside her,"What the fuck's going on."she asked.

"Just shot me load darling,"Nozzer explained,"Oh fuck I'm kn ackered."

"Is that it ?"Analise enquired.

"trough I'e had a kip and a provender,"Nozzer agreed,"Then plot on round two."

"In your dreaming,"she replied,"Anyway we have to secernate Daddy we're engaged."

Too late Nozzer sensed the trap,"Engaged ? I'm just letting you kip here ?"

"Oh you heartless fucking beast,"she wailed putting on a decent display of Nile Crocodile binge,"Professing that you bed me only to cast me aside as soon as you've slimed me."

"Nice one,"I suppose next off you'll be telling Daddy I fucking forced you ?"

"Err,"Analise stalled realising she'd been rumbled.

"Well rustle up a half decent Dowry and I'll fucking marry you,"Nozzer offered.

"putz head, that's why I was a VV, Dad's too skint to pay a seemly dowry,"Annie replied.

"Oh well let's see what he's offering,"Nozzer offered,"On the other hand Lashkar-e-Taiba not, I got another stiffy. On your backbone wench, it's your favourable day ! ”