antediluvian Rome, about 0 BC

"Oi Nozzer, what you at mate ?"grade Susan Brownell Anthony shouted above the clamour of a meddlesome Rome morning.

"Off down the Colloseum Tone,"Nostradamous replied,"They got some new Gaulish mead and a new passel of slant slaves."

"Sounds good, I'll tell Julie,"cross Susan Brownell Anthony replied.

"phone call me Julie again and your mind will conjoin those of the Hun on the spikes above the city gates,"Julius Ceasar chipped in.

"All right keep your crown on,"Mark Anthony replied,"Do you reckon they got any virgins Nozzer ?"

"Six hebdomad in a boat with a bunch of randy rower, I don't think so,"Nozzer replied,"More like Oars, anyway the came from what the slant birdcall"Es Sex"what ever that is."

"Right,"brand Susan B. Anthony agreed.

"Anyway I thought you had a fixture bunk up with Cleo ?"Nozzer continued.

"Oh yeah, majuscule, dandy compexion, great in the sack but she bathes in donkey milk and foetor like a blinking domestic ass,"stain Antonius replied.

"Can't have it all,"Nozzer laughed,"See you later right ?"

Nozzer called in on his partner Michael Angelo on his way to the Colloseum,"Mikey how you doing couple ?"he called.

High above the floor of the Sistine chapel Mikey was lying on a scaffold gameboard having a kip and sleping off a punishing night on the Mead and ale.

"Diminu - bloody - endo,"Mikey replied,"Keep the racket down. Me heads splitting mate."

"It's the key mate, you want to use lead not cow muck,"Nozzer suggested,"Anyway it was only supposed to take up a workweek, two coats of briliant gabardine they said."

"Mate, they are paying by the day and they like my graffiti,"Mikey explained,"Money for old Mexican valium like."

"All right for some,"Nozzer replied,"You hear about Pisa beacon light ?"

"Every roll in the hay physical structure heard about Pisa beacon, started keeling over so they put a twist in it,"Mikey sighed,"Just fuck off and do some Philosopherising or what ever it is you do."

"Charming,"Nozzer agreed,"Fuck you too."

The Colloseum was busy, every cunt and his mate was there eyeing up the new slaves.

Some was naked, the slant and Gallia was so picket they needed browning up to be fanciable, but the Arabians had to be kept under back or they blacked up, near was shackled together but some was in individual wooden cages.

"What's the compass point of that ?"Nozzer asked some random bloke.

"From Greece, fucking Lesbos,"he said.

"From Lesbos or are they Lesbo's ?"Nozzer asked.

"puss,"the cuss answered,"Anyway what can I do you for ?"

"Oh a dainty razzing, say twenty one, blonde, big melon vine,"Nozzer replied.

"How much you got ?"the blighter queried.

"fifty dollar bill, fifty five at a push,"Nozzer offered.

"Well you can have her,"he pointed to a beautiful Angle angel,"From Wessex, beautiful girl, fucks like an saint,"he taunted,"For one hour for fifty."

"I want's a family slave,"Nozzer explained.

"For fucking fifty, you wan na get real number mate,"the fellow replied,"You can have her mum,"he said pointing to a wrinkly old hag.

"Nah, rather fuck a camel,"Nozzer admitted.

"shuffling up yer head, sporting lady or scrubber, cleaner."the bloke sighed exasperated.

"Bit of both,"Nozzer replied.

"That's a bonk wife, don't go there mate they're difficulty,"the feller advised before he saw some early mug and fucked off to con him instead.

Nozzer wandered off,"Houseboy sir ?"some woman hollered, pointing at half a dozen defenseless fella tied up in a pen.

Nozzer looked up,"Hung like Equus asinus,"she said.

"Looks like you been taking advantage,"Nozzer quipped.

"Every half hour, do and see the appearance,"she offered.

"For fucks sake !"Nozzer sighed,"I ent fucking Hellene !"

"No ?"says the woman as she grabs the penny-pinching slave's shaft and starts wanking it,"You sure ?"

"Absolutely,"Nozzzer says.

"Then why you getting a surd on ?"she asked,"You want me to fuck off your piddling cock instead ?"she asked.

Nozzer looked down at his Toga, it was like a collapsible shelter terminal was pushing it out,"Fuck !"he said out loud.

The woman suddenly left her hard worker and stuck her hired hand up Nozzer's Toga. He wished he had put on clean bloomers but they was in the wash so he had come out without any.

"Ooooh you are a big boy,"she cooed,"quintet Sirstes to make you cum or I'll rip it out by the ascendent for free."

Nozzer liked it rough,"Rip it out by the etymon,"he requested,"Please."

She dropped him like a dig,"shag off pervert !"she said abruptly.

"Me a roll in the hay perv ?"he snapped,"Its you what fucks slave in public ten multiplication a day !"

"Twenty on a good day,"she smiled.

Nozzer shook his head and went cycle to see the animals. Andreas the social lion Tamer was looking worried.

"Wazzup Andy,"Nozzer queried.

"piece of tail Gaul bit Leo,"he said pointing to one of his lions feet,"Gone septic, look."

Nozzer was stunned but not stuid enough to get in a lion John Cage to look at an septic foot at Lion's lunch time, which was basically any time a Leo wasn't actually a kip.

"Looks bad,"Nozzer agreed.

"Poor bugger's off his feed look."Andy qipped pointing at an old Phoenician pair liberally coated with tomato plant sauce cowering naked at the back of the cage.

"You'll have to get a new one I reckon,"Nozzer said unhelpfully.

"Oh nifty help,"Andy replied.

"What odds on him winning Fri ?"Nozzer asked.

Andy had a think and then said"If its Christians again it's a numb cert but Gaul, I reckon old Leo will run a fucking leage."

Nozzer nodded and went to hold back out the Chariots for Saturdays race. His partner Benner was working on his two sawhorse chariot carefully adjusting the trailing by walloping the wooden axle as hard as he could with a immense mallet.

"Fucks sake Benner you'll bust it mate,"Nozzer cautioned

"I don't fucking care if I do,"Benner cursed,"Fucking understeers on the entry to Lesmo 1 then oversteers on way out."

"Too much shtup information,"Nozzer suggested,"See yah."

Nozzer was bored, he worked nights working out the future from the headliner, it wasn't a bad job, lie on the ceiling for a few second a couple of times a month and aspiration up some load of bolloks to tell the cuckoo down the Senate. Writing it up was the high-risk, three ringlet all the same for different department. Anyroad it nonplus Lion Taming and being a Gladiator.

He wandered up the Temple of Vesta to give a bit of raillery with the"Vestal Virgins."

There was a bit of a disturbance. Some bird was getting chucked out of a a side door. Nozzer recognised her, she used to live near his gaff, her dad was summat in the Senate.

Nozzer wandered up to stick his beak in,"Analise ?"he queried.

"Fuck off pervert,"she replied sharply, before she recognised him."Oh sorry, you're Nostradamus ain't you ?"

"Yes, shout me Nozzer,"he replied helpfully.

"Bloody bitch have chucked me out, me dad will make a fit,"she stormed.

"But why ?"Nozzer asked.

"Do I have to suck up a picture ?"she snapped,"They want Virgins."

"Oh,"Nozzer said awkwardly.

"I was having a foxy wank and got carried away,"she said.

"You are Analise ?"he enquired.

"Yes, sorry, they call me Swan Vesta in the Temple, I thought you were after anal,"she replied.

"I shouldn't nous as it happens,"Nozzer replied.

"Well leave it,"she snapped,"Oh fuck now what do I do, Dad'll go mad."

"Lie low for a bit ?"Nozzer suggested,"You can kip round my gaff if you like."

"In your bed ?"she asked.

"If you like,"he smiled.

"And if I don't ?"she asked

"You can kip on the flooring after I fucked you ?"he ventured.

"Oh well beggars can't be selector,"she said happily as she gathered up her meagre belongings,"Lead on."

Nozzer was gob smacked, usually he paid a few Sirstes for a bunk up with a striver and got tod to get it on off by free women but suddenly here was a bird what was up for it. He should have sensed a trap but his mental capacity was definitely switched off and his bollocks firmly in control.

"Failed monthly inspection, said me Hymen was bust,"Analise explained,"Anyway what were you doing here ?"

"Bored, I was looking for menage slave to celebrate the house clean and jerk and that."he explained.

"And that ?"she asked.

"That,"he agreed.

"sound like you need a wife,"she suggested.

"Right, so where do I find a wife ?"he asked.

"Are you blind or just dazed ?"Analise asked.

"Oh, look I didn't mean,"Nozzer said.

"Yes of course I will !"Analise gasped and kissed Nozzer on the cheek.

Nozzer was shocked,"Look"he said.

"Oh, lets get assail your place and consumate it !"Analise taunted.

Nozzer warmed to the approximation. Analise offered up a understood prayer, Nozzer wasn't the best catch but his bed meter sleeping on the cobblestones of the Autostrada.

In just a few moment they were in Nozzer's gaff. Analise gritted her teeth and slipped off her toga.

"Do you like what you see ?"she simpered.

"Uh ?"Hozzer replied but his cock spoke for him.

"Oh you are a big boy,"Analise exclaimed as she saw the front of his toga ascent propelled by his pommel end, she had serious uncertainty that something that big would actually fit inside her.

She sat on the bound of the board, spread her legs, closed her eyes and dreamed some beautiful gladiator was about to spear her.

"Oh Annie you're so beautiful,"he husked and kissed her forehead.

Her pussy began to feel moist. She kept her heart tightly closed so she didn't have to attend at Nozzer's ugly mug,"Do it !"she husked.

A searing pain wracked her judgement as Nozzer brutally shoved his meat into her soft yielding kitty-cat,"Awww, that fucking hurt !"she railed.

"Tis done now my dearest,"Nozzer explained,"No more pain just pleasure."

"In your fucking dreams mate you're tearing me in half !"she replied but the pain was subsiding.

Actually it was starting to finger quite Nice, Annie warmed to the approximation, she opened her center, to be honest Nozzer didn't spirit quite as ugly, she could get used to this she decided.

"Oh that feels so dainty,"she cooed.

"Not bad is it ?"Nozzer agreed and he promptly shot his load.

Annalise wasn't expecting it, what with never having it before and that. All that love succus shot up inside her,"What the shag's going on."she asked.

"Just shot me onus Darling,"Nozzer explained,"Oh fuck I'm kn ackered."

"Is that it ?"Analise enquired.

"boulder clay I'e had a kip and a feed,"Nozzer agreed,"Then plot on cycle two."

"In your dreams,"she replied,"Anyway we have to tell Daddy we're engaged."

Too late Nozzer sensed the cakehole,"Engaged ? I'm just letting you kip here ?"

"Oh you heartless fucking wildcat,"she wailed putting on a adequate display of Nile Crocodile rent,"Professing that you jazz me only to cast me aside as soon as you've slimed me."

"Nice one,"I suppose next off you'll be telling Daddy I fucking forced you ?"

"Err,"Analise stalled realising she'd been rumbled.

"Well rustle up a one-half decent dower and I'll fucking marry you,"Nozzer offered.

"Dick head, that's why I was a VV, Dad's too stony-broke to pay a decent dowry,"Annie replied.

"Oh well let's see what he's offer,"Nozzer offered,"On the other manus lets not, I got another stiffy. On your back chick, it's your favourable day ! ”