1.

jokester : `` Ok pronounce.. M.A.C. D.O.U.G.L.E.S.S ''

mug : `` Its pronounced MacDougless ''

joker : `` Ok now pronouce M.A.C. D.O.U.B.L.E. ``

sap : `` Ok MacDouble ''

joker : `` finish one now pronouce M.A.C. H.I.N.E ``

fool : `` Ok MacHine '' ( sounds like mac hind )

joker : level at old house phone and says `` Now what is that ? ``

sucker : `` An answering machine ''

joker : `` Ok now spell motorcar ''

patsy : `` Ok ? M.A.C.H.I.N.E. ``

jokester : `` Yup you just spelled MAC HINE. ``


Ok this joke i heard from Howard Stern.


2.

Q. Do you sleep with the true grounds for all of these blonde prank ?
A. Brunettes and Aythya americana think they look voguish making them all up !

Q. What do you squall a brunette between two blondes ? ? ?
A. LUCKY ! ( She finally gets some attending ! )

Q. What 's black and blueing and lying in a ditch ?
A. A Redhead who has told one too many dumb blonde jokes.

Q. What does a Aythya americana miss the most at a party ?
A. The Invitation !

Q. Why are there so many blonde jokes ?
A. Because the blonde are out with all the men, the brunette and carrottop have nothing better to do on Friday and Sabbatum nights.


3.

A blonde paseo into a coin bank in New House of York city and asks for the Loan officer. She says she 's going to Europe on business for two hebdomad andNeeds to borrow $ 5,000.

The camber officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loanword, so the blonde hands over the paint to a new Mercedes Benz SL 500.

The car is parked on the street in front of the depository financial institution, she has the title and everything check-out procedure out. The bank agrees to accept the car collateral for the loan.

The bank 's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $ 110,000 Benz as collateral against a $ 5,000 loan.

An employee of the banking company then proceeds to push back the Benz into the depository financial institution 's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blond paying back, repays the $ 5,000 and the involvement, which comes to $ 15.41.

The loanword ship's officer says, `` young woman, we are very happy to possess had your occupation, and this dealings has worked out very nicely, but we are a trivial puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

What puzzles us is, why would you bother to take over $ 5,000 ? ``

The blonde response, `` Where else in New York city can I park my Car for two weeks for only $ 15.41 and expect it to be there when I return ? ``


4.

There were two blonde, and they had just came from a store.

The blonde that owned the mustang had locked her Francis Scott Key in the car. She was trying to pick the lock when she stoped to roost for a second.

When she sat down, her champion said, `` rush up, it 's starting to rain and the top 's down ! ``


5.

This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the turn indicator worked.

She stuck her nous out and said, 'Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes ...'


6.

things to do in the privy booth ...

1. Stick your medallion unfastened under the cubicle wall and ask your neighbour, `` May I borrow a highlighter ? ``

2. Say `` Uh oh, I knew I should n't put my lips on that. ``

3. sunniness and gonorrhea loudly every metre somebody breaks the silence with a bodily procedure noise.

4. Say, `` Hmmm, I 've never seen that people of colour before. ``

5. Drop a marble and say, `` oh shoot ! ! My glass eye ! ! ``

6. Say `` patch, this piss is cold. ``

7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 indorsement and then drop a cantaloupe into the john bowl from a high place six to eight substructure. sigh relaxingly.

8. Say, `` Now how did that get there ? ``

9. Say, `` humus. Reminds me of humus. ``

10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the cubicle rampart of your neighbours while yelling, `` Whoa ! Easy boy ! ! ``

11. Say, `` Interesting ... .more doughnut than floaters.

12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread Arachis hypogaea butter on a wad of toilet paper and fall it under the stall wall of your neighbour. Then say, `` Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please ? ``

13. Say. `` C'mon Mr. glad ! Do n't accrue asleep on me ! ! ``

14. Say, `` Boy, that sure looks like a maggot ''

15. Say, `` patch, I Knew that drain yap was a little too small. Now what am I gon na do ? ``

16. bet a well known drum metre over and over again on your butt cheeks.

17. Before you unroll pot composition, conspicuously lay down your `` Cross-Dressers Anonymous '' newssheet on the base visible to the side by side stall.

18. crushed a lowly mirror underneath the carrell wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, `` Peek-a-boo ! ``

19. throw away a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing `` Born Free ''

20. When you 're in a bathroom stall lead a Snickers candy bar with you and when someone is next to you, squish it in your hand and reach under the stall paries and say `` You got any More toilet paper over there, This English 's completely out. ``


7.

Q : What do a Soviet emigre and a fifteen-watt light bulb have in green ?
A : Neither one is very bright.

Q : How many bailiffs does it adopt to vary a lightbulb ?
A : Ten. One to shift it, one to hit you in the kidneys, and 8 to suffer around such that none of this gets caught on camera.

Q : How many Spinks handler does it take to sleep with in a light medulla oblongata ?
A : Five. 1 to actually chouse in the lightness light bulb, 1 to carry him out of the ring, 1 to tell him who put the lights out, 2 to count the money, and it all only takes 91 minute !

Q : How many lawyer does it lease to modify a light incandescent lamp ?
A : How many can you afford ?


ok i hope you like all of these jape .