This story is an existential drama focusing on psychology, impression, and Romance language. It takes a while to get to the sexual material, but do n't interest, there is mess. If you are looking for a slash history, please go back to the chief Sir Frederick Handley Page. If you are looking for a deep love story, I hope you enjoy. I hope you 'll be patient and carry through your votes until the end. Thank you.




Chapter 1



If someone were to ask just who"she"was, I wouldn't be able to answer, as I hadn't the slightest clue. A hallucination ? Some kind of angel ? For the past five years, I would recognize each morning with the cobbler's last warm fingers of a dream clinging to my mind. I'd whorl on my face, and lying next to me would be a young lady of my age, but with beauty unmatched by anyone else on the planet. With liquid polish skin as soft as ripe fruit, a skin color shade like that of molten bronze and silver medal mingle together, and bright blue eyes that held unique kindness and warmth, the very sight of her was like a religious experience. Her most predominant characteristic was her hair, an refined crimson that could remove all fear of blood from anyone's soul. Groups of Strand would gravel together and then coil towards the end like a lingua of fire, granting her a tempered and yet untamable mane that hung down to her thighs.

Along with the typeface of a goddess, she had a figure that made a mockery of the give-and-take"flawlessness ”. Her glassy-smooth wooden leg seemed to stretch her miles, coming to an end at a replete but taut rear end with the shaven ingress to her William Henry Gates of paradise just barely visible under the sheepfold of the cotton fiber sail. Her midsection was like that of a bikini model's, with a concave dip on either side from her sodding tenuity. Cliché as the condition was, she certainly had an hourglass physique. endure but not least, even though she looked only eighteen, she had D-Cup white meat that looked as flaccid as urine balloons but house and lively.

Every day, I would ignite up with her beside me, lying in bed naked as if we had spent half of the previous Night making angelical, passionate making love. Each time, she would appear to almost be faintly glowing, and coupled with her flawless dish, I was surely justified in calling her an angel. Lying there, I would watch as her middle opened like the rising sun, letting me stare into her beautiful blues. Staring right back at me with sempiternal love, she would smile, hum, and fall back to sleep. Even while knowing how it would end, I would always hit out and try to relate her, desperate to sense some sorting of proof that she was actual, but always, she would fade away before I could even stroke her hair.

Suffice to say, I was almost haunted by this"dream ”. This girl, this figment of my imagination, was the light of my life and the reasonableness why I went to bed each nighttime and plowed through each day. I had never heard her voice, never touched her, never been able to address to her, and I didn't even know her name… yet I loved her. She was my secret, the one aspect of my life that I would never verbalise of, no affair what. When she first started to come along, I even obsessed over her. I would draw her every Nox on a sketchpad hidden under my bed, remembering her mug with quartz glass clarity and moving my hand with attainment that I would never accept as my own, mirroring her prototype with graphite and newspaper publisher with such closeness that I would hold no dubiety as to being possessed.

Ironically, she was actually the only dream I would ever have. I would meet her each cockcrow in a half-awake state, but through the night, my psyche's eye would see naught but an endless expansion of darkness, in which I would hover aimlessly until waking up. The only if variance from the smutty sky was a single pinpoint of light in the distance, a twinkling headliner almost completely out of muckle, then I would wake up to find the girl beside me. I often wondered if she was that sensation. She certainly fit the persona. She was the light of my life, a lightsome I desperately needed, one of the stopping point few reasons why I was still alert. Being capable to wake up and see her each morning, even if for less than a minute, she supplied me with enough will power to endure the life I didn't want. But I have her, I'll always have her, and the day she disappears is the day I lose that final reason not to end it all.

But she wasn't here today. I didn't expect her to, seeing as how I found myself waking up in the infirmary. A vivid light source had shone through my eyelids, stabbing my already sore mind. I could discover the beeping of a mettle monitor nearby. My thinker was a hugger-mugger sight from the cocktail of drugs being pumped into me from the IV dish at my incline, but I delved into my consciousness in hunting of solvent. I remembered sitting in class… 6th period. elder biological science was half finished… but there was something wrong. I remembered that my hands had been trembling, even more than usual. My peel was being pricked with invisible phonograph needle like all my branch had fallen asleep, but I couldn't remember if it had come suddenly or if it had built over time. I remembered the low dagger stabbing me in the back of the cervix. I remembered falling out of my electric chair, roaring in agony as I collapsed to the flooring.

But it wasn't the lights or the beeping that had woken me up. It was the pain electrocution ceaselessly throughout my body. In the single consequence from when I woke up, I went from being alright to feeling like I was in the burn Baroness Jackson of Lodsworth, charred from header to toe. My muscles all felt like they were being pierced with hot nails, my organs twisted into burl. I leaned over the edge of the bed and vomited on the story. My philia monitor was sending a digital howler, bringing in a nurse.

"Kill me !"I screamed as the painfulness intensified.



I sat on the infirmary bed with my worried parents, facing Dr. Nat Turner, a blonde woman in her former XXX. I had an IV bag of morphia hanging next to me, trying to inhibit the chronic pain that was ravaging my consistence. I was receiving the maximum amount possible, but even then, all of my peel felt like a vesication sunburn and my insides faired no better.

"What you experienced in class was a seizure, caused by multiple tumors in your brain, focused on two specific sphere. It may be possible for us to kill them with a heavily dose of radiation and chemotherapy, but with how minuscule and legion these tumour are, the chances are slim. It's a completely new form of malignant neoplastic disease, and we aren't certainly what its long-term outcome are."

My parents started to cry, but I was completely tranquil."Is it deadly ? What the hell is going on with me ?"

"Not in the traditional sense, but we just aren't completely sure."She held up an X-ray picture of my brain and pointed to a light spot."That is the turgid group of tumour and we imagine the oldest. However, whether they have grown over time or have always been there is a mystery. They are attached to your limbic system. Specifically, they are growing from the part of your brain that produces the chemical substance serotonin, as well as former chemicals that control temper. It appears that they aren't growing any further, but—"

"Let me venture, they're basically smothering that voice of my brain down and starving me of those chemicals ?"

She nodded and pointed to another bright smear."Yes, exactly. Now as for the chronic pain, these tumour on your brainstem are the informant. The tumors are basically rooting down into your nervous system, causing uninterrupted stimulation of botheration sense organ. They're basically acting as electrodes hooked up to your spinal tower. It seems that until now, they haven't been large enough to trigger you continuous pain. You could almost say that the tumors have finally activated. What you're experiencing now, that infliction is from the tumors simply existing. That seizure you had earlier was the tumor reaching the top level of stimulation and maximum. That may ingest been a old thing or they could randomly occur from now on while on top of your electric current condition.

"So is there any way to diminish the extent of my pain in the ass ?"

"Yes, with anti-convulsion medicine, pain killers, and maybe some antidepressants, we might be able-bodied to diminish the extent."

"By how much ?"

"wellspring, at this point we can't quite be sure. With drugs, we can make it so that you won't black out if the seizures persist, make the painful sensation tolerable, and maybe take away the sharpness of the depression so that you won't become suicidal."

‘ It's too late for that.'“ So it won't pop me, but it will fill me with excruciating hurting and nominate me unequal to of felicity ?"

"Yes,"Dr. Turner said mournfully.



Not wanting to put out staying in the hospital, I asked to be discharged. Before leaving, we stopped off at the hospital pharmacy to cull up my Master of Education. I was holding my hands out in the low temperature October air as we drove, hoping that the raw iciness might ease the blunt throbbing in my fingers. The nuisance pill were slowly kicking in, making it so that the stinging was bearable, but already, the give-and-take"supportable"had gained a all new meaning for me. The drive home was unsounded, for my parents were trying to keep back tears, but I was calm. That's the one honorable affair about being suicidal : the prospect of your own death actually brings you peace. Now I didn't have to feel guilty about killing myself. The effect it would have got on my family line was one of the lone things keeping me from ending it all. Now I could just let the cancer do it for me.

In a way, it felt unspoilt to finally birth an answer as to why I suffered from slump. I had been depressed for most of my eighteen eld, even suicidal, completely in demarcation to the comfortable middle-class living I lived in my hometown in Maine. I couldn't even count the number of antidepressant drug, forced therapy lesson, and intellection of longing to just die. There are citizenry starving all over the humankind, people suffering. It's a mystery to people like me why they just don't putting to death themselves. It is the exclusively question I will leave behind. How do they have lives that make my repugnance look pathetic, but they have the will to exist that I lack ? That was always an topic nagging in the back of my mind : being depressed without having a reasonableness. It was that mixture of guilty conscience for knowing that I should study myself lucky but the inability to do so, and the flavor of helplessness from the knowledge that it meant that goose egg could change how I felt, and that if I would wish well for Death in a well-situated life, then I would wish for death no matter what.

But now, I just don't charge. I don't need to care. I may not have suffered as much as people in Africa or early hellholes like that, but… at least they are capable of feeling happiness. Compared to them, I'm broken, and these tumors are the proof. I have felt the bite of a vane to try and cancel out my inner bother with outer hurting. I have felt my saneness ripped away by years of sorrow. depressive disorder is Sir Thomas More than sadness. It is the inability to feel joy. It's a missing cornerstone, like a building with a sinkhole where its twenty-five percent foundation should be. No topic what you use to try and support the building, it'll declension away, and the building can never stick out, until it too crumbles and falls into the pit. To live with Great Depression is like running a endurance contest with one leg, and the only aid you can get is hoi polloi suggesting you buy a better pair of shoes.

But hopefully, I'll be idle soon and I won't have to feel painfulness or sadness anymore.



advent home, I went heterosexual upstairs and hid in my room. I just wanted to go to kip ; maybe it would ease my distress. Downstairs, I could hear my parents telling my younger sister and chum the bad news.



I was completely in awe, hovering in vacate infinite within my dream. Before me, roaring in limitless loudness was the single ace I always saw when I slept. Before now, it had been little more than a undivided speck of clear off in the distance, but now it was clearly in view, the size of the moonshine and nearly frightening, simply because I realized now that it was not simply a star. In actuality, it was a black hole, devouring a star from the inside out, sucking in the flames and gas of the supernal giant. I could see it as if the sun was a piece of fruit cut in half to let out the core. Yet miraculously, the sun did not cringe or decrease in size. It seemed more like it was constantly regenerating. hurl around the eternally-dying star was a green egg-shaped nebula, about three times as great as the star itself, and making the unhurt affair resemble an eye with the lightlessness pickle as the pupil.

"The eye of God…"I murmured.

While the wizard was beyond my homo comprehension in terminus of size, I could feel myself being pulled towards it through the military posture of its gravitational force. Whether this was truly the eye of God, I could not be sure, but one thing I was certain of was that it was my death. No, this target within my dream would not vote down me, but it was the symbol of my end. The faithful my brain got to it, the closer my body got to death. At the beautiful wad, I could not avail but smile hysterically."I'm going to die, I'm finally going to die. Just a short longer and I will finally find peace."

I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, I found myself back in my bed. As always, the imaginary angel was lying beside me, clearly visible in the igniter of the break of day sun. Beautiful, she was so beautiful. The two of us were less than a infantry apart, yet it felt like a sea mile. Lying there, this gorgeous hallucination in front end of me, I felt my pain in the ass disappear like the extinguishing of a candle. Repeating my break of the day ritual, I reached up and tried to stir her, desperate to experience the sensation of her cutis against my own. As expected, she disappeared just as I was about to take striking, but something stopped me from retracting my arm and letting it fall. My eyes broad, my hand trembling, I scanned through the recorded esthesis of that brief sec, desperate to figure out if what I had sensed so in brief had been real.

It was faint, so faint that it was almost beyond the reach of my sentiency, but it HAD been there. lovingness, that was what I felt, the air within the space that she always occupied was warmer, as if energized by her physical structure passion. My rolled my hand around through the empty space she had left behind, running my fingers through the tender air as if her long crimson fuzz were brushing against my palm tree. I then held my hand up to my face, clutching some of the air from that space, and smelled it. Like the warmth, what I detected within that air was almost beyond my power to horse sense, but it was there, an aroma so faint-hearted that I was actually working my mind into a headache trying to canvass it. Roses, that was what it was.

Shaken by this new revelation, I rolled over towards my window and winced from the light of the noontide sun shining directly into my eyes. My parents had let me skip school.

"I might as well get used to this…"

I immediately grabbed my bottle of Master of Education as my suffering began to irrupt from being conscious, downing two pills without anything to drink in. It took time to get dressed, as I quickly found that my muscles were stiff from the moving ridge of throbbing botheration. Aching all over, I walked downstairs and saw my dad in the keep room, reading the newspaper. He was there to pass water sure I got through the day without hurting myself. Trying to stay unnoticed, I snuck into the kitchen. The last matter I wanted was for him to require some long conversation about how I could verbalize to him at any time and all that early stuff. I took my antidepressants and convulsion MEd, and made myself a bowl of cereal. Just as I was crossing the kitchen with the stadium, a bolt of electricity shot up my prickle, making me experience like I was being flogged with hot mountain chain. I dropped the arena with a loud overhead and collapsed to the level, gripping my skull and holla in anguish. This was even big than my 1st raptus, a level of pain reserved for the cursedly someone of Hell. My dad bolted out of his chair and rushed over to me. Within 30 seconds, it was over. I could feel the annoyance ebbing away, until it was at its normal levels.

"Are you all right ?"

"Yeah, I'm ok."

"We're taking you to the hospital."

"No,"I declared. My dad looked at me as I picked up the reveal shards of the bowl and stood up."I'm going to be having these seizures for the repose of my aliveness. I can't go to the hospital after every one. I'll get used to them eventually."



I suffered two more than capture that day, both of them causing me to fall to the story in agony. My mom got dwelling house with my older sister and unseasoned buddy. They all paused when they saw me in the TV room. I was watching a horror movie and the elbow room was glum. There were bags under my eyes from the strain of my seizures and my custody were trembling more than usual. I looked at my mom and gently shook my point. She got the message and slowly pulled my siblings away.

The dinner had an awkward secretiveness as everyone tried not to stare at me.

"Emily, you wouldn't happen to have it away what my prep is, would you ? Did you talk to my instructor ?"I asked my sister.

"No."

"I need to head back to school tomorrow, I can't afford to turn a loss two daytime as a senior."

"No, absolutely not,"my mom argued.

"I need to go back to school sometime, and this pain and these seizures aren't going to go away. I have Cancer, not some goddamn cold that will go away after a day of rest."

Everyone tensed as I mentioned the cancer.

"There is no reason for me to rest home."



The sky was a dark Louis Harold Gray and sleeting as my dad drove us to school. other students were swarming in to get out of the rainwater and snow as the doors were finally unlocked. first period was about to depart and I hadn't wanted to waitress for it with all of the early nipper. The conclusion affair I needed was an awkward twenty minutes outside the school with everyone staring at me.

"Are you sure you want to do this ?"my dad asked for the 100th time.

"Like I said, there is no intellect for me to stay home."

I stepped out of the car and into the falling snow and rain, pulling up the hood of my sweatshirt. It was going to be a abrasive winter. Fall hadn't even ended and the dry land was covered by a foot of Snow and ice. I didn't notice the frigidness as I walked towards the school. I was the hold up individual inside and I quickly headed towards my first-class honours degree class. I was hoping to stay on unnoticed, putting off the inevitable nuisance value. I stepped into the small classroom, trying to hide behind the gang of nestling getting into their rear end. I sat in the back of the class where no one would see me. If I had been noticed, no one was mentioning it. The instructor began calling attendance. I became more and more tense as he approached my name.

"Marcus Baron Clive of Plassey ?"he asked, doubtingly.

"Here."

As one undulation, everyone turned to me.

"Ah, I had heard that you had suffered a gaining control on Monday, are you alright now ?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I found out that I have a new form of malignant neoplastic disease, but I'm fine."

Everyone gasped and began muttering amongst each other. The instructor was silent for almost a minute.

"Please, continue,"I said dryly as I took a pill.



I walked down the crowded halls with everyone staring at me. Every few seconds, someone would ask me a question about the disease in my brain or tell me all that lame bullshit about how I could talk to them at any clock time. I reached for my pills the second adequate time had passed since my death one. Just as I put my deal on the cap, the superstar of being stabbed in the back of the skull with a cop bat ran through my eubstance, sending me tumbling down to the floor and roaring in pain. People around me freaked out as I writhed on the floor, gripping my skull as the tumors on my brainstem all sent a particularly strong tremor through my heart. Within several seconds, it was over. I lied on the floor in a cold travail, slowly trying to get up.

I raised my head and coughed up a mouthful of blood onto the floor. The stress of my unceasing nuisance, coupled with my ictus had ruptured an artery or venous blood vessel somewhere. People tried to help me up but I waved them away. I took two pills and ignored the vox of everyone as I walked away with a limp.



It was lunch and I was sitting where I always sat. Against the wall of the cafeteria was a set of turn up bleacher where students could sit during lunch if they didn't want to be at a board. As always, I was by myself, but that was because I was compelled to be. I sighed as another girl came up to me and said that if I ever wanted to talk, I could talk to her.

‘ You're only saying that because of my cancer. If I didn't have a brain full phase of the moon of tumors, cypher would commute between us. I barely even screw who you are.'I fought the temptation to say it, but my angriness was making difficult."Thanks,"I said instead, but with a tone as dry as the brick wall behind me.

She walked away and I looked out over the cafeteria for the one-hundredth meter, trying to avoid the regard of the masses looking at me and loathing what everyone was. humans was as much of a genus Cancer as the neoplasm in my brain, and I hated my metal money with every fiber in my being. I hated the weakness, the greed, the stupidity, the shortsightedness, and every former affair that made us the overgrown cockroaches that we were. I had to hate them, for my own good. Even before my genus Cancer, my life had been agony. My idea was ravaged by its own cold beingness, all this metre cheated out of chemical substance like 5-hydroxytryptamine. For nearly of my life I haven't known what peace, happiness, or sanity meant. I'm trapped in a realm of existence that I can not escape from, and no matter how well I live, be it a billionaire or a homeless person vagrant, my wretchedness and anger will be never go away me. That unhappiness had in time been twisted into hatred, the feeling of not belonging to any part of the world decaying into loathing for that world. Hatred is my lone means of survival, the only alternative to wallowing in desperation. It hurts less to hate the world around me than to need to be a contribution of it. It hurts less to detest others than to be starving for a connection.

But I don't want to be the cliché outsider who thinks that he knows better than everyone because he sees everything in a fatigue lighting. Social conception and conventionality always seem like a stupid wastefulness of time to me, but I only think they're pudding head because I'm incapable of enjoying them. While I always judge the people around me and detest them for being homo, I never think myself better than them. If anything, they are all better than me. I envy them all ; envy them for the life story they get to subsist, the mental stability they get to savor. Social lives, friendships, Romance language, just the ability to incorporate within collective and find joy and understanding… There are pupil down below me who are voice of something bighearted, be it something as simple as a shoal club, but I'm simply not capable of being able to do that.

I looked at the tables surrounded by just girls. There was a meter when I would have sold my someone to just receive a little girl who would go out with me. In my heart, I knew that only love or last could bring me peace, and I had known it for years. For close to a decennary, I had been looking for my mortal mate, the one girlfriend who could take away my pain in the ass. At least, that's what I used to want. Now I knew it was too late.



I staggered through the Charles Martin Hall, trying to convalesce from a seizure only a few bit'prior.

"Marcus, do you want to talk ?"

I already knew who it was. Her name was Julia, and she was one of the few hoi polloi who were nice to me. Well, she used to be. I hadn't talked to her since sophomore twelvemonth. She was kind and beautiful, and for a piece, I thought that I loved her. But then I learned that she had a swain, and after that, I simply lost interest. Now I saw her simply as a nuisance, a reminder of the daytime of wishing I could be with her, no affair what the toll, twenty-four hour period when my annoyance and desperation were euphoria compared to my electric current agony.

"No."

"You need to peach to someone."

"No, I just need to get to class."

I spat out a mouthful of parentage. The haemorrhage would always start after every seizure.

"Why won't you look at me ?"she asked in desperation.

"Because I'm in nuisance ! I've been in pain hanker before I got these tumors. I used to guess that either love life or expiry could cure me, but I hate this world and everyone in it far too much to ever accrue in love ! I'm already dead, I've been utterly for as long as I can think of, but for some grounds, my dead body won't take the wind and croak, so I'm stuck in this wretched and agonizing bag of frame and bones, trapped in a creation I despise and surrounded by a specie that I pray would go extinct ! You've made it discharge that you can not be the one to help me, no one can. I can only sustain until my execrable existence wipe itself out."

"Are you mad at me ? !"she asked defensively.

I turned around and walked away."No, I'm mad at fortune. I'm mad at my own cursed existence. If you want to help me, then put a fastball in my head."



Wanting some reinvigorated air and deciding it would be better not to risk having a raptus on the bus, I walked dwelling. The atmospheric condition wasn't too bad, and the frigidity helped ease my pain in the neck a little, plus it gave me metre alone with my thoughts, loose from distractions and noise. Walking along the ice-caked route with my hood tightened to keep my ears warm from the coke, I let my mind wander back to my dreaming. If what I had concluded about that star was right, then my death truly was approaching and would soon conclude. Even if what Dr. Turner had said about my Cancer not being terminal were redress, the English essence sure enough would be. How long could the human body truly finale when forced to suffer endless torture ?

‘ Whether or not it is my true dying or not, until that time comes, this is how I must march through time. Whether I will keep to exist in some other soma is irrelevant, no mind can truly understand the meaning of death or the weight it carries, therefor, it can not live within our minds. We can not comprehend death, we can not realise it, not without experiencing it ourselves, at which point, we cease to live. Therefor, death is incomprehensible ; it is the end of all reason, in which all human being rules and assumptions become nonmeaningful. We can only understand things that exist, while we ourselves exist, so while we may fear death, it is impossible to become aware of it ourselves.

We can not feel our own death, just as we can't feel nonexistence. We can catch others die, we can feel our own spirit slipping away, but we can not feel that final moment. We can not know precisely when it ends. We can see a million citizenry die, but we can not see our own. It's like every single person is an immortal surrounded by mortals, a continuing paradox of observation and ignorance. Life occupies the entirety of our nous and our existences, it is infinity ; it is the endlessness. Death is the world outside of eternity, the kingdom beyond arguing, in which origin and end are one in the same.

If I can not chance or notice the end of my life when it happens, then through my senses, it will never take place. I am divinity, and the only way for my dying to pass is for everything and zero to collide and end my macrocosm. Or am I wrong ? Will I extend to exist beyond death ? Will I live on, even while my body guff in the ground ? Is there a life after this one ? Is it honorable ? Is it big ?'



"Hey Marcus, want to play chess ?"my pal Phil asked.

I was sitting on the couch in the animation room, watching TV with a wet towel on my question. I had been feeling feverous all day. Phil was three years vernal than me and had the same black hair as I did, though his was cut shorter and he had a different bone structure. He and I had been playing chess for years and he had never once beaten me. You could say it was the one activity we did as blood brother, and from what I guessed, this was his attempt to try and perturb me from my pain.

I shrugged."Yeah, sure."

Phil sat on the other end of the couch and the circuit board was set up. I kept my heart focused mainly on the TV, looking at the plug-in only when it was my turn. I had some difficulty moving the pieces ; my fingers felt fuddled and brittle.

"Phil, do you love where I could get some pot ?"I asked out of the blue.

"What ?"

"Come on, I know you're a entrant, but you've always been on the social circuit. You must cognise someone who can deal me some weed."

"No, I don't hang around with people like that."

I sighed again and continued to work. For once, Phil managed to circumvent me, but it was a hollow triumph, especially with how quickly he won. I knocked over my mogul with a suction stop of my tongue.

"Well now, it looks like the old king is dead and the new mogul has risen. Long live the king,"I said dryly before getting up and leaving.



"Hey Marcus, what's up ?"my Sister asked, surprised to see me standing in the room access.

Emily was a yr younger than me and a Junior. She had my mom's blond hair, but it was motley with my dad's iniquity hair gene.

"Do you know anyone at school who could betray me some pot ?"I asked, nearly scaring her with how blunt I was.

"What ? No ! And you shouldn't be smoking that stuff, it's bad for you !"

"Oh cut the shit, Em ! It's goddamn marihuana, it's completely harmless and you know it !"

Emily's centre darkened and we were both silent. I softened my tonus before continuing."You know I wouldn't even bother with the hooey under rule circumstances… but things have changed."

"Do you really think that stuff and nonsense will facilitate you ?"

"I wouldn't believe it if it did. I'm just hoping that it can make things light. Come on, pot is probably the to the lowest degree dangerous affair I could put in my system these Clarence Day and the government banning it is one of the most delay things in the history mankind. It's a fucking plant that makes the great unwashed feel undecomposed. Besides, let's say the anti-pot propaganda is avowedly and it is bad for me, do you honestly think that I'll live long enough to face the consequences ?"

"Marcus, you're not going to die,"she said softly, getting up from her bed and walking over to me.

"Emily, I'm already on borrowed clip. The movie is over, the mention are rolling, and Rotten Lycopersicon esculentum gave it all negative reviews. I'm going to die soon, I know it, so just be a good sister and let me be a little selfish before I kick the bucket."

Emily sighed."Mike Broflovski, you can find oneself him under the football bleachers at school. I don't know anything else about him."



I was lying in bed, staring at her longingly on another school dawn. With my heart fixed upon her hallucinatory figure, the fires of agony within my physical structure were silent, nearly making me sob snag of joy. It had been almost a minute since I had woken up and saw her open her eye before falling back to sleep, but for once, I managed to defeat my desire to try and match her, and instead was letting the delusion continue, or whatever it could be called. She was sleeping, this female child who's name I did not know, this beautiful Angel conjured up by my demented soul. She was sleeping so peacefully that I wasn't sure I could ever defeat my guiltiness if I disturbed her.

I could birth lied in that warm bed for the rest of my animation, just staring at her. With each breathing spell she took, I could see her chest rising with the expansion of her lungs, and the aflicker strands of her blood-colored hair's-breadth. The blanket of my bed was barely wrapped around her beautiful build, letting me expect upon almost her entire eubstance. Piercing this real-world aspiration, my alert clock began to beep. Knowing that it would entail her disappearance, I reluctantly reached out over her to turn it off. Even with the deactivation button pressed, the girlfriend remained with my arm stretched out over her like a bridge. She had never stayed this long before, was the hallucination just growing in depth ? Would I finally be capable to touch her ? Humming in bliss, she opened her eyes and stared at me with a small but afters smile on her lips.

She spoke.

Her part was inaudible, but her mouth parted and shaped the Christian Bible with incomprehensible charge, like a skipper artificer sculpting a spinning the Great Compromiser pot with her paw. I had never been one for reading rim, the ability completely eluded me, but once, just this one time, I was able to study the formation of the intelligence like a vivid neon sign, and pick up them whispered in the nerve center of my mind.

"I love you."

III words, three simple row, but the weight they carried pushed me over the border. unable to throw the teardrop of joy back any longer, I desperately reached out to embrace her, only for her to disappear before I could be blessed with her touch.



I stepped into the locker room of the school. It was time for gym form but I wouldn't be participating. My constant pain was my permanent apology. Why couldn't this Crab have kicked in when I was a freshman ? I stuffed my backpack in one of the cabinet and grabbed my pills.

"Why do you always cry when you fall down ?"

I already knew who it was and I was trying to keep my roue from boiling. His public figure was Tom, and he was nothing but a punk and bully. He had tormented me all throughout heart and high school, an extra force driving me into depression. He was probably one of the enceinte rationality as to why I wanted to die.

"Tom, leave him alone, he has cancer,"another student warned.

"So ? Its not like I would cry if I had that,"Tom grunted before shoving me.

I turned to him, the pudgy psychopath.

"You're just a piteous trivial bitch."

In my mind, something snapped. The anger, which had always been suppressed by the awe of consequences, finally broke disembarrass. Tom was heavy than I was, but I didn't care. Practically foaming at the mouth, I reached out with both bridge player and grabbed him by the pharynx, slamming him against the lockers. I was strangling him with all the strength I could gather in my sick dead body, using adrenaline to increase the top executive of my muscles. I had my thumbs pressed against the briny artery in the side of his neck, halting the period of lineage to his mentality while robbing him of the ability to breathe. He couldn't direction enough to use his arms to free himself. I would normally never retaliate like this, as I had learned early in life that the bullies always got off without a single slap on the wrist joint but the victim who defended themselves basically got the chairperson. There was nothing that could be done but assume the pain and hope your persecutor would eventually get bored. For what I was doing, I could easily get expelled, but not a unmarried part of me cared. If I was going to live a life of agony and die an early last, I might as well do whatever the fuck I wanted and drag some bastards down with me.

"How about I correct some of the bullshit spewing out of that deformed pile of gray matter you call a brain ? low gear of all, I don't fall down. I have goddamn seizure. Second, the neoplasm in my fountainhead are strangling my limbic system just like I'm strangling you, meaning that my brainiac is now incapable of producing chemicals that let me feel anything early than misery and angriness. end but not least, when I have a seizure, all of my sense are so overwhelmed with the pain in the ass that I collapse as I am bombarded by wave of agony. I suffer every second, but when I have a seizure, it makes being lit on blast seem like a massage ! Have you ever been in so much botheration and wanted to die so bad that you almost used your own fingernails to lash your wrists ? I think anyone would throw some tear if they experienced that."

Tom was turning blue from the throttling and I had to defend with everything I had to proceed from murdering him right then and there in front of everyone. Instead of ending his life, I threw him down at the ground, inadvertently smashing his face against the corner of one of the cabinet room benches. The impact completely shattered his eye socket and fractured his skull. Another few centimeters and his eye would have been permanently lost. After he fell to the background, I finished with a flush to the jaw, busting up almost half of his teeth. Tom was passed out on the base and pouring blood with everyone staring at me in fear.

I opened my bottle of infliction Master of Education and took one out."That is just a sampling of what I live with constantly."



Tom was rushed to the hospital and I was suspended for the rest of the month. Under normal fortune, I would accept been suspended for a wide month or even expelled, but the penalisation was lightsome for several reasons. Tom had been the school bully ever since 6th grade and was nothing but a worthless toughie. He treated everyone like shit and teasing someone with cancer was the worst thing anyone had ever seen. Everyone in the cabinet room testified against him and said that I had done what needed to be done long ago. I silently disagreed with them on that. What should have been done long ago was Tom being lined up in front of a firing police squad and nip. I knew in the back of my mind that everyone was testifying for me because of my cancer, because everyone hated Tom, or because everyone now feared me. My sentence was also so perch because of the recent trauma of encyclopedism of my disease.

My parents immediately picked me up from shoal. During the ride home, they constantly contradicted themselves. They would say how much trouble I was in and that what I did was wrong, then go back and say that Tom deserved it and what I did was reasonable. I didn't really wish about being suspended, and Thanksgiving vacation would come up a few weeks after I got back, letting me have to a greater extent time to unbend.



As the days droned on, I spent my time watching horror movies. The Inner Light would be turned off and I would laugh bitterly during every gruesome kill. horror movies were one of the few thing that I didn't hate. The fact that I watched them in the dark on Friday and Saturday Night, while well-nigh multitude were hanging out with friends made my parents nag nonstop about my social demeanour. They would severalize me that I need to spend time friends, and I would tell them that I didn't want friends.



"Who are you ?"I whispered, once again lying in bed and facing the girl of my dream.

Ever since she had first spoken ( albeit while mute ), I had been hoping and wishing that whatever it was, be it a hallucination or extrasensory outcome, whatever it was that allowed me to see her each dawn would concede me the power to interact with her even further. At the head, she batted her optic coyly and rolled onto her back, letting the picket light passing through my window shine down upon her naked body. The girl looked at me, giving a sleepy smile as if waking up on a Sunday morning with nothing to do but doze.

"My name is…"

The name was spoken, entering my mind and drawing confusion. I repeated it, uttering the unexplainable noise even without understanding it. The noise was not a Scripture, consonant, or vowel, it was like cypher found in nature or anything humans had ever created, it could not be compared to anything. As soon as I heard it, I completely forgot it, but even with it slipping my memory, I was somehow able to replicate the sound if I so desired. The lady friend smiled as I said her public figure back to her, as if what she had told me and what I had said was her material name, but my mind would not allow for me to be aware of it.

"Who are you ?"I again asked.

The girlfriend smiled and repeated her statement as well. This time, I instead focused on her voice. This was the outset meter I had ever heard it, and it was more beautiful than I ever imagined. Clear as the chiming of a Bell but soft as the coos of pigeons, the sound of the three wrangle preceding the blur that masked her name was like a lullaby.

"What are you ?"

break type, the female child moved towards me, slowly yet suddenly, and nearly making me jump. She brought her human face up to mine, our brim almost touching while we stared into each early's centre and exchanged the same breath.

"Wait for me,"she murmured, pulling away and disappearing.



I stepped into the school on the first of November, and it was as if fourth dimension stopped upon my arrival. Everyone was standing like statues while staring at me with both fear and admiration. With my usual stony scowl and gray hoodlum pulled up, I took a pain oral contraceptive pill and proceeded to my cabinet. I was walking with a limp, for I had suffered a seizure in the shower earlier that morning and banged my leg. My dad was now adding a guardrail in example of another seizure.

After I stopped off at my cabinet, the great unwashed started bombarding me with enquiry as they had done on my 1st day back. They asked me to secern them what happened in the locker elbow room, even though the guys in there had already retold it a K times. They also asked me to repeat what I had said about my cancer, for that had been the first time I had actually described it to someone. I just ignored all of the dubiousness, acting like they weren't there. There was no reason to suffice, even if it was just to be polite. They meant nothing to me, and once I graduated in the bounce, I would never see them again.



I was lying in bed, holding a joint the size of it of a cigar. I had bought all the green goddess I could off that Mike guy and told him that he had better have more when I came back. If I was going to blow my savings on pot, I might as well get some customer service. I always had a few minute to myself after every school day, my sib would be hanging out with friend or be playing sports and my parents would be at workplace, leaving me with the star sign.

Lighting up one end of the joint, I took a inscrutable puff and immediately began coughing and hacking. Ok, maybe I should take it slower…



I began getting into more fighting at school. Quite simply, I was done with the bullshit. If anyone insulted me, gave me lip, or got on my bad side of meat, I did not hesitate to throw a biff. I was going to die soon so there was no grounds to present a fuck about anyone or anything I decided I might as well portion out with old business while I still had time. A lot of people had made my life sentence a incubus and I was paying them back. I received my fair share of harm, I was often sporting a black eye, busted lip, or bruised fount, but as long as I didn't suffer a capture during a fighting, I normally won. I guess that was one advantage of full-body endless pain : your foeman can't do anything to make you detriment anymore than you already are.

The school tried to dismiss my actions, or at least punish me lightly. Each altercation earned me a couple day suspension, but they didn't have the spunk to go any farther. The school system and I had bad history, and they certainly had a lot to justify for. My parents were the Saame, putting up a pretended front of condemnation while being ineffective to get ahead the courageousness to punish me. They knew that I was self-destructing, acting out to try and make out with my pain. It was the exclusively thing I could do.



It was the day before grace and my relatives were expected to arrive in less than an hour. They all knew that I had cancer and I was not looking forward to some sappy family reunification. I walked to the door and grabbed my coat."I'm going out for a walk."

"But everyone is going to be here in just a few minutes !"my mom called from the kitchen, working feverishly to make up a big dinner.

"Exactly. Could you do me a party favour and assure them to act like I don't have cancer ?"

Before my mom could reply, I stepped external and into the virulent cold. There was no wind, but the air was frigid and raw. The air was brighten, showing a blench blue sky as the sun slowly drifted towards the horizon. The surrounding area was a mix of thick forest and marshy theatre of operations, the John Brown landscape painting now painted white. I started walking down the side of the road, not caring where it took me, even though I knew exactly where it led. The sand and gravel on the incline of the hollo was filled with garbage, from beer bottles to discharge cigarette carton. The automobile that drove past me hit me with a sudden breeze, like a endure cash in one's chips breather. The raw frigid air, the stark landscape, the taunting dawdler of cars driving by, and the glass around my feet was both comforting and depressing. The cold helped ease my chronic hurting and the barren scenery made me feel more at household, but with each empty fag carton I kicked aside and each car that broke the silence, I was reminded of how alone I wanted to be and how much I couldn't be.

I soon arrived at the wooded Park down the road from my business firm, but I wasn't ready to go home yet and I needed a prison-breaking from the cars and the road. There was no one else around ; even a member of the most bitter and chaotic crime syndicate would choose to remain home rather than be subjected to this bitter coldness and wind. I entered the timberland, following the footmark of detent and their owners, lightly covered by a sprinkle of invigorated snow from the night before. As always, my thoughts were on my own mortality, as I tried to work out out how much time I had left. I should probably pop making a will for when my body gives out and I at last achieve death, but what did I want ?

I came to a stop, my eyes wide, my breathing shallow, staring at the creature before me. Resting against a fallen tree to get out of the breaking wind, a coyote lay on the cold ground. Its chest heaved slowly, causing the dried blood around the bullet wound in its side to fissure. Almost every night, the coyotes could be heard yipping and howling in the farthermost orbit of the forest, but this was the first time I had seen one up close. From the looks of it, it had probably wandered onto someone's yard and the property proprietor shot it to take a leak sure no others came by. From the coagulation, it had likely happened the previous Nox, but from the arrangement of trauma, it was probably still bleeding internally and had organ damage. The fact that it had been able-bodied to limp this far into the Grant Wood was a miracle.

I approached the hurt animal, slowly, but without fear. Right now, it was at its nigh life-threatening, but what was the worst it could do to me ? sting my hand ? I wasn't sure I'd even feel it. The Canis latrans looked up and gave a soft growling, but was too tired and low temperature to even show its teeth. I crouched down before it and reached out. It tried to bite me, but its fangs missed and I managed to rest my hand on the top of its head. Knowing it could not maintain the bluff up any longer, it laid its head back onto the cold ground and waited for death. I brought my hand to its breast, feeling its dire breathing place and its feeble heart beating.

Too tired to propel its head, the prairie wolf shifted its gaze upwards, looking past me. I followed its eyes to the barren tree subdivision above, contrasting against the evening's pink sky. For all I knew, this creature and I were thinking the Lapplander thing. Would I ever see viridity leaves on those branches again ? Or would this be my last winter ? Would I die, scurvy and in pain, or was there even a glimmer of a chance for me to live my life without hiding from the human beings ? Would the day ever come when I too can relish in the sun ?

Solemnly, I reached in my pocket and pulled out my Swiss Army knife. I couldn't leave this animal here to suffer. I had to put it out of its miserableness. I folded out the knife and put the tip to the back of the coyote's spine. I hesitated, spending another minute looking into its optic and feeling its body shake. I had never killed an animal before, not counting the one or two mouse I had run over when I was learning to drive, but this thing was much braggy than they were.

"You and I are exactly the like. The sole differences are that you probably want to keep on living… and I wish someone would be merciful enough to do this to me."

Taking a oceanic abyss breathing time, I forced the blade into its neck, severing the nerves as best as I could. Its body gave the smallest twitch and then everything became still and its eyes closed. I stayed there a piddling while longer, feeling the heat slowly leak from its torso. I reached behind it into the crater of dirt of the eradicate tree and grasped a low smattering of icy soil. I rubbed it between my hands, letting it thaw so that the smell of the nutrients could err free. I stared at the dirt, moving it around to break up the minerals from the decaying matter, and then sprinkled it on the slain animal. Soon, I would die, just like this coyote, and I would return to the earth, just like everything else. For the first-class honours degree prison term in a farsighted while, I actually smiled, knowing what I wanted. I wanted to be buried, but without a coffin, and certainly without being embalmed. I wanted to embrace my death, not hide from it in a pine tree box while noxious chemicals keep me from rotting. I wanted to sense the stain on my grimace, to be enveloped by the worldly concern, and maybe experience a tree planted over my grave. At least then, the worms and the plants would get more use out of my torso than I ever did.

I wiped my mitt off on the coyote's fur and then stood up. It was fourth dimension to go home.



I stepped through the front man door of my family and was instantly bombarded by hugs and salutation from my relative : cousin-german, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and everyone else. I could sense the ineptitude underneath their speech as they asked how tall I was and all of the other cliché inquisitions.

"Dinner is cook !"I heard my mom call from the kitchen.

I had no appetite.

"I'm just going to go to bed."

Before anyone could even try to block off me, I went up the stairs and into my elbow room. I moved to my bed, wincing as my muscles became more and more sore. I lied down and let my aching body settle.

"Please, just let me sleep and not ignite up."



"Why can't I hear your name ?"I asked, speaking to the fille while the hallucination would let me.

Having already gone through the immortalize movements and actions, the young lady opened her eyes and gazed at me with her usual warm smile, while almost laughing in a gentle hum.

"Are you even rattling ?"

"Does it count if I am tangible or not ?"

hearing her speak warmed my sum with the possible action that maybe she wasn't just a figment of my imagination."Yes, no… I'm not sure."

The miss then moved closer to me, closing the gap between us and reducing it to a few unendurable inch."If I don't exist, if I am just a creative activity of your own mind, then you should be well-chosen. If it is you who created me, then I am always with you. I am wherever you want me to be and you just have to like it."

I put my hired man over my aspect and rolled onto my back, having suddenly felt my heart watering up. Every word that passed from between her beautiful lip was a shock to my very soul, like the ending of a beautiful book.

"No, that's not dependable enough. I need you with me. I need you to be veridical. I don't know why, I just need—"

I was silenced, my unhurt body brought to a ended full point by the sensation of the girl lean over and pressing her brim against my own. I moved my hand away from my oculus, in complete and thoroughgoing unbelief. This was the first fourth dimension I had ever been able to equal her, and that first speck was expressed through my first candy kiss. Her fount, so close to mine, I could see every single detail of her visage and saturate myself with her rosy aroma. The sensation of her sassing against mine, it went beyond just canceling out my botheration, it made me feel… good. I felt felicitous, euphoric, like I had just been working for three days straight and was settling into a hot tub. Her lip were so soft and strong, but also carrying a blue flavor. It was like I was kissing a wisp of steam from a cup of tea.

The miss eventually broke the connection and we stared into each early's heart. She then sat up and moved on top of me, her hands pushing down on my shoulders and her farsighted red pilus hanging down around our faces like a curtain, seceding the place between us from the outside world and making it all our own. Staring at her full white meat and feeling the smooth lips of her pussy rub up against the shaft of my solidification penis ( with only the fabric of my boxers separating them ) was driving me wild with hormonal lust.

In all honesty, I hadn't been this aroused in months, I could literally experience the rip pumping furiously through my body and firing up the long-dormant parts of my head that I had ignored for so long. But beyond her lulu, beyond her naked body resting on mine and making me hornier than ever in my life, the not bad feeling was her weightiness on me. It was real. I could feel her pushing down on my shoulders, sitting on my lap. I could even hear the saltation of my mattress creaking beneath us. This weight was real, it had to be, and that meant she was real.

"You need me to be real because you need to believe that there is some panorama of this world that can make you happy, that there is at least one person who can take away your pain. But if I am just a creation of your own mind, then you should be overjoyed. It means that you hold the key to your own happiness, and wherever you live, no thing how you live, you can make it paradise."

The words were whispered and her face was lit with tender care and love. The girl then leaned down and settled herself on top of me like a cat, her chest pressed against mine and her face buried in the side of my neck. Her body, it was so tender and soft, I was completely at a exit for Word on how to trace it. All I could do was wrap up my arms around her womanly soma, hold her tight, and cry tears of joy. I didn't forethought, real or not, she was here with me, and that was all that mattered. Whether she was some sorting of Angel Falls from heaven or just a figment of my vision, as long as she was with me, I'd be happy.

"Marcus, occur on, it's meter to wake up. You've been in bed for too long,"my mom said, knocking on the door.

At the strait of the doorhandle shaking, I turned with reverence in my optic."No, don't. Please, not yet."

The handgrip was fully turned, and just as the door began to move, the girl disappeared, leaving me alone once again. My mom just stood in the doorway, looking at me and wondering why I was crying.



Even if my dream had now reached new levels of depth and I could interact with the daughter more than I had ever hoped, that didn't supporter my daily routine. In fact, it made it speculative. Spending every irregular longing to go back home and go to bed so that I could wake up beside that girl, my life became even more low. Everything that made my day difficult became horrible, and everything that had never bothered me before was now a curse word, as it required sentence and stood in my way. Add that to my continuous nuisance and my multiple daily seizures, and each day went from being an endless Scheol to a taunting deprivation of the one Light in my hellish life history.

Such lively contact like that limited Nox before was rare and not often repeated. The female child still appeared every first light for a few mo, but I could rarely do anything Sir Thomas More than touch her gently with my script. Going further would cause her to disappear. She never spoke much, only when I said something to her or asked her query, and even then, her answers were dim-witted and often repeated. Regardless, just waking up next to her each morning was enough to get me through the day, but barely.

While my imagination of the female child seemed to mature, every night, I dreamt about that star, the wiz being devoured by the black hole in its gist, the star sitting in a nebula looking like the eye of God. I could experience myself drawing closer and closer to the black hole in the middle, being pulled in towards my death. The finisher I got, the larger the celestial volume became, surpassing my human comprehension. Yet strangely, after that night, while my increasing law of proximity continue to expand my survey of the star around it, the Negroid hole was actually shrinking like a catching pupil. It was as if the black hole was sizing itself to match with my distance from it.

December was exceptionally rough, quite simply because I had decided to try chemo and radiation handling for my cancer. Well, to be honest, my parents basically coerced me into doing it and making me find shamed if I refused. They wanted me to live no matter what, so the only way to throw off their suspicions that I was eagerly awaiting death was to feint hopelessness and fear towards the handling. I eventually agreed to treatment under one precondition : if I didn't see any results before New Year's or I started losing my hair, I was going to step down. I didn't have high expectations, but I would do it to get my parents off my back.

On my first day of chemotherapy, I found myself in a room with early cancer patient, all sitting in death chair lining the bulwark. Each one was hooked up to an IV, and their microscope stage of treatment were all seeable on their emaciate organic structure. Considering the time it took for each academic session, everyone had method acting of keeping boredom at bay. There were laptop computer, handheld biz cabinet, Scripture, and one of the kids was even playing with a Rubik's Cube. I sat by the window, letting the toxicant run through my vena. I was also receiving a heavy window pane of morphia, helping to blunt some of my pain. Hopefully I wouldn't have a seizure in the hospital. The final matter I needed was some intern right out of med school sticking a tube down my throat.

Drowsy from the drugs running through me, I let my brain wander. My thoughts drifted back to the girl and what she had told me. She said that if she wasn't existent, if she was just a figment of my imagery, then I could call on her whenever I needed. Maybe it was something I should try. I closed my centre, forcing aside all distractions and wizard. I focused my mind on the girl, but was unsure of what would actually bring her Forth River. If I just thought about her, would she appear in this way with me ? Should I try and fall asleep and aspiration about her ?

Slowly the sounds of the early patients faded, the world falling silent around me. But I was not alone. I felt someone gently grasp my hand and opened my oculus, staring into the beautiful blueing of the girl. She was kneeling at my foot, naked as always. Behind her, the chemotherapy way had blurred into an unrecognisable montage, as if I was falling out of sync with reality.

"Marcus, my pricey odoriferous Marcus…"she whispered, resting her head on my lap.

I slowly reached out and placed my hand on the top of her forefront, stroking her haircloth."You're really here,"I gasped in amazement.

"Of form I'm here ; I'm always with you. Marcus, I'm so majestic of you, for everything you've endured. Your forbearance will be rewarded, I promise you. Just hold on and I will bring you happiness."

"What am I supposed to wait for ?"

"The day when our individual can finally accomplish convergence."

I then jerked in my death chair, having been awoken by the nursemaid. I had slept through the treatment.



Christmastide and New Year's came and went, and I was happy to see them go. I hated the holidays ; all of the cheer and happiness made my organs fail. With the beginning of the New Year, I had the doctors check my condition and see if any progress had been made on my neoplasm. After a month of radiation and chemo, I had figured at least a slim modification would be found. No. There was nothing. They had resisted the treatment and I was stuck where I was.



Each day, my pain was getting worse, and I found myself taking Thomas More and More pills than I was supposed to, both painkillers and anti-convulsion meds in an attempt to hold my capture. Originally, I would pack two painkiller every four minute and one anti-convulsion med every six, but now I was downing them like tic tacs. My body was weakening, but in a way, that was a good affair. I was close, so close. Soon I could rest in peace.



"Twenty bucks for a loony toons, and I'll give you an extra ten for a blank needle and to help oneself me set up. My hand are too wobbly for something like this,"I said, standing in an skittle alley in town.

The sky above was gray with a pacify snow pouring down on the dealer and I. Luckily, the café to our right kept us out of the jazz. The man before me looked to be in his late twenties, unshaven with deep mistrust in his eyes. I was a new customer to him, and normally he would have turned me away on instinct, but luckily I looked sick enough to sink for a enured user.

"Let me see your hands."

I held them up, letting him see them shiver. With every nerve ending in my fingers firing, my workforce were shaking so badly that it looked like I had MS.

"Alright, fine. You're in luck, kid. I just got some brand name new pandean pipe yesterday and I've got one left."

He looked around to crap sure we wouldn't be seen and then took out his merchandise. Filling up a spoonful with heroin, he clenched the handgrip with his teeth and used his hands to hold a swooning and protect the flame from the malarky. Slowly the gunpowder melted into its liquid conformation, and before it could cool, he unwrapped an unused syringe and filled it with the drug, finishing by handing it to me in telephone exchange for the Johnny Cash.

"Tch, circumstances. If luck were on my side today, this phonograph needle would end up killing me."

With the monger leaving, I sat down on the cold wet ground, pulling up my sleeve and looking for a vein. It certainly wasn't hard ; my peel was as thin as paper and my arteria were all swollen from malnutrition and the strain of my disease. I pushed the needle into my arm, not even feeling it amongst the billions of other terrible pecker tormenting my body. I hesitated with my quarter round on the plunger, wondering if this was really the itinerary to take. My animation was already cut forgetful and the fortune of there being a cure for my painful sensation were slim, but did I really want to foster effect myself with even a bingle shot of this toxin and risk developing an addiction ? After all, the pot had been a dismal bankruptcy. What chance did diacetylmorphine get of helping me ? I concluded my hesitation with a laughter, deciding I didn't have much to lose.

I pushed down onto the diver, filling my bloodstream with the poisonous substance. Casting the abandon syringe aside, I leaned my head back and stared up into the snowfall, waiting for the drug to withdraw affect. Could I possibly be any more pitiful ? Sitting in a backbone alley with heroin running through my vena, trying desperately to free myself for just a few moments from my disease… It was beyond misfortunate ; it was shameful. But soon, the drug began to take outcome, numbing my gumption and bringing down my pain to a dull pounding while leaving my brain spinning. Waiting for this sinister miracle to truly free me from my agony, I stared back up into the gray sky and let my mind wander.

Is there a god ? I ask myself that question often, but of course of instruction, so does everybody. I don't know if I am a believer, an atheist, or just an agnostic. I see no reason in the world, no meaning, no normal behind the Chaos other than the traffic pattern humans try to create. Is there a role in any creation ? Even mine ? Was I created with this body simply to stick out ? Was I created and then abandoned, never cared about by whatever deity might have cursed me with life ? Was all of mankind created to suffer or was it created and then abandoned ? There is so practically pain in the man, so a good deal torment beyond my own. What kind of squirm god would put us on this ground to live as the odium that we are, caught in evolutionary limbo ? Would our creator not also be our parent ? Shouldn't they try and protect us from impairment ? Are we merely entertainment ? A TV show for more forward motion sprightliness anatomy ? Or are we little more than a bacteria colony growing on a toss out test tube, created by stroke and never acknowledged ?

What use is there of a god in this man man ? Either he doesn't exist, doesn't care, or is he a gruesome freak that loves to create life solely to toy with it. People waste their living praying and begging to some bastard in the sky to transfer their sprightliness, all the while trampling under everyone beneath them and casting judicial decision upon those who walk unlike paths. But for judging them, am I no better ? Do I have any right to speak badly of people when I too am cursed with this pathetic human being physical structure ? How can I condemn others for being judgmental when it means being judgmental of them ?

I guess that's one of the main problems of this universe : no one can create change without doing exactly what their opponent is doing. Whether it is trying to stop a genocide or get a bill passed through copulation, every stand is just a repeat of its failed predecessor. Everyone thinks they know what's scoop, they think they have the key to saving the world or that they have seen the truth that no one else has so much as caught a coup d'oeil of. All the Sami mistake are just made over and over again, all the same promises spoken and never fulfilled, all the mistake of others pointed out by those who are aught more than hypocrites. If this sprightliness really is the work of a god, then he is a sadistic god, a life where the tallest societal structure is naught more than a pile of detritus, a stack of unsuccessful person all stacked up on top of each early with no one capable of escaping their mantle.

I don't know if there is a god, I'm not sure whether or not I want there to be a god. If there isn't a god, then all this is meaningless and there is cypher for us in this world but a speedy life, an ineluctable destruction, and an infinity in which no one remembers us. If there is a god, then he is either incompetent or evil, in which type, I want nothing to do with him other then a chance to pay him back for creating me. What am I ? A worshiper ? An atheist ? An agnostic ? What is the name for soul whose belief in God is nothing more than the desire to drink down him ?

"Marcus, I'm cold."

I looked over, seeing the girl sitting future to me, her sizable skin contrasting against the brick rampart and the snow-covered sidewalk. She looked at me with sober eyes, pained by the shape I was in and how despairing I was.

"Do you even feel things like the cold ?"I asked, more bitterly than I meant.

"I feel them because you feel them. You are my connection to this globe, just like I am yours. We are bound."

I got to my feet, struggling to keep my balance."I'm sorry you're boundary to individual as pathetic as me."

"You are not piteous. You are desperate, you are in pain, and you are starved of love."

"Who could ever love someone as broken as me ?"

"I do. Marcus, of all the people in the existence, I am the one that you have zilch to hide from."

She stood up and leaned against me, her subdivision wrapped tightly around my cervix. I could actually palpate her, feel her warmth.

"You'll never have to put yourself down, never say you don't deserve me, never have to feel shame or embarrassment. Every bingle panorama of your life sentence, of your personality, of your somebody, I love with all my heart. Marcus, I accept you. I accept you for everything you are. Now please, let's go dwelling house. I don't want you to take hold of a cold."



It was morning, and I was getting ready for schooltime with my household in the kitchen. In my bridge player was a knoll of pills, one that I stared at loathingly. Pain killer, anti-convulsion meds, profligate thickeners to keep my interior hemorrhage from going out of control, antidepressant drug, and countless vitamin supplement to help me get some nourishment. With incessant pain wracking my body, I rarely noticed my appetite, and any food that I did eat was often thrown up during my ictus, so anovulatory drug were the only way to stimulate for certain I got the nutrient I needed. I was always on the burly side, but after so many weeks of this painful sensation, I had burned through all of my fat backlog and was little to a greater extent than peel and off-white. Hoping that I wouldn't just vomit up them up later, I poured the anovulant into my mouth and forced them into my gut with a glass of H2O. prison term to set out a new day.



"We're so close now."

My centre bolted open and I quickly realized that I couldn't motion. The girl, the girl who's gens I did not cognize, her whisper had woken me up. Never before had this happened, and even more, she was sitting on my lap again, almost pinning me down. The sun had not yet risen. It was barely after 2:00 am.

"What ?"I asked, certain I was still dreaming.

With a warm grinning, she leaned down and gently kissed me."We are so close now. We can talk, we can touch… we can kiss. I can feel you and you can find me, the time has almost come. Just wait a piffling longer."

"What has almost come ?"

"happiness,"she purred lovingly while sitting back up.

I sat up with her, wrapping my branch around her and resting my forehead against her chest. The soft warmth of her big breasts against my face was a sexual nirvana, coercing my prick into a pulsing erection.

"Why can't I hear your name ?"

The red-haired looker giggled and gently pushed me back down, hovering over me on all fours."Because you have not yet named me."

"What do you mean ?"

"You must nominate me, so that I may live solely for you, so that I may bring you felicity and ease your suffering. Then when you regain the will to live, you will exist solely for me, and this world will become Eden for all the days of our lives."

"But don't you exist already ?"

"Why don't you touch me and decide for yourself ?"she suggested coyly.

I smiled, feeling my horniness and excitement brush away my fatigue. Raising my right hand, I reached up and cupped one of her white meat, sending an uncontrollable shiver through my body and causing some pre-cum to damp my boxers

"I didn't know you were such a degenerate. How naughty,"she murmured, closing her eyes and humming to herself blissfully with a small smile.

I was smiling as well, massaging the orb of flesh with both care and curiosity, having never felt a girl's boobs before. I began massaging the former one with my left handwriting, rubbing the nipple with my ovolo and causing the girl's busyness to increase in volume. Jiggling them, squeezing them, and rubbing them together, I thoroughly explored every secret her fair sex held and familiarized myself with every unmarried centimeter of her soft skin.

"It feels so salutary to have you touch me,"she panted as I began toying with her teat, gently squeezing them between my indicant and halfway fingers and rubbing them with my thumbs.

"You certainly feel genuine,"I said, well-chosen than I had been in years.

"Well to be sure enough, how about a taste ?"she offered, lowering herself down and kissing me.

Following the lead of her backtalk, her spit slipped into my mouthpiece with unbelievable length. I almost felt like I was going to clog on it. Her mouth and glossa, they were so delicious, and the wetter the kiss became, the more of her look I was able to taste. She tasted like ripe mangos and tea and the longer I tasted her, the more energize I felt.

After respective minutes of snuggling, the young lady pulled her lip from mine and smiled."My eubstance is so hot rightfield now, can you cool me off ?"

I smiled and raised my head, kissing her first on the cheek, then down the side of her neck, and to her collarbone. As I slowly moved down, the girl slipped her hands into my boxers and grasped my rooster, nearly making me cum in good order then and there simply from the wiz of having someone else tinge it.

"Just as I thought, it's sized just for me,"she hummed, lovingly stroking it while my lips finally came to her breasts.

Shaking like a drug junkie, I was barely able to contain my sexual hungriness. All these years, my hatred and economic crisis had made my instinctive driving little more than a tedious botheration, but now, it was like it was all rushing out at once. I ran my lingua across her breasts, unable to believe how good they felt and tasted, and just that I was making such familiar impinging with this strange entity.

"Be as jumpy or as gentle as you want, I belong to you after all,"she said tenderly.

At her speech, my emotions suddenly flared up and quelled my instinctive desire. This lady friend, whether she was real or a hallucination, I did not give care. I loved her, she was precious to me, and I could not hurt her even if she asked me to. I was deadening, easy, working my sassing around each mamilla and stopping periodically to rub down her white meat with my natural language. While I worked, she rubbed her suave puss against the shaft of my cock. It was so soft, already soaking wet from her foreplay and making me dizzy with the sweet aroma.

"Such a simple touch, yet it feels so good. To be so tight to you, I feel like I'm going to pass out in happiness,"she cooed.

As her movements became more aggressive and the gentle rubbing became passionate detrition, I reached out and held onto her shapely ass with my hands. So soft and yet so unwaveringly, both wax and taut, she had the ass of a Brazilian model. All this stimulation, it was too very much, I could sense all the muscle in my grim body tensing up from my approaching orgasm.

"I feel it, Marcus. I'm about to cum."

"Me too,"I murmured, wishing I could be inside her instead of just grinding against the entrance.

Gyrating her hips, the girl's movements increased until it actually felt like I had penetrated her. We finally came at the Sami time, me launching about a blastoff trash'worth of seminal fluid onto my abdomen and fresh sheen of wetness coating the girl's womanhood. At the feeling of ecstasy, I gave a trench grunt and the young woman gave a shrill and rather adorable whimper before she collapsed on top me.

"We're so close, we can already bring each other happiness."

"Any chance we could accept it a whole tone further ?"I asked, placing my script on the side of meat of her look and brushing aside her long crimson hair.

"No. Close as we are, we can not yet bond ourselves in that way. Only when we both live will we be capable to create life for ourselves. Soon, we will be able to give each other and ourselves eternal euphoria. postponement for me."

"But I don't know what I'm waiting for… And I don't know if I can wait much longer. Every day, my power to endure this pain lessens. I'm losing my sentiency of touch, my sight and hearing are failing, and my eubstance is wasting away because I can not hold intellectual nourishment down. I just want to die. I just want it all to check. If I end it all, then I can drop eternity with you."

The little girl lowered her head and kissed me, brushing aside my fear."We will pass all of eternity together, but wouldn't that infinity have in mind even more than if it also meant a lifetime ? Just wait, and I will grow this land into heaven for you. Here, let me give you something, something to entertain you over until our day comes."

Smiling, she moved down to my deflating manhood. Lowering her head, she began licking up the semen I had ejaculated just a instant ago, humming in joy like it was chocolate sirup. Watching her tongue lap up my seed, I felt my cock re-harden, which she lovingly stroked with her hand.

After licking up every fall, she held her head just above my humanity, stroking it with her paw and working out any softness."Now, let me bring you happiness."

She then took the whole matter into her mouth, swallowing it with simplicity and bringing her lips all the way down to the root word. At both the sight and touch sensation of her sucking me off, I immediately had my arcsecond orgasm and shot a battery-acid of semen down her pharynx. The young lady quickly pulled her headway back and coughed, but before I could rationalise, she smiled.

"Don't trouble, it's delicately. Just try and hold back a niggling, let me enjoy this too. Besides, it's yummy,"she said coyly.

keeping back ? hellhole, that was sluttish, I doubt I had any sperm left to release, but with her deal stroking my cock and that hungry reflexion on her face, I couldn't lose my hard-on if I wanted to.

delivery her principal back down, the girl resumed blowing me, but this meter taking it boring. She started simply by running her tongue around the head, licking away any sperm that remained from my first or second orgasm. She then moved to the shaft, delivering long wide of the mark sweeps, almost tracing each venous blood vessel and sending shivers up my prickle. After physically memorizing every detail of my cock, the miss again wrapped her mouth around it completely, bringing her head down so the tip was crammed against the back of her throat. Moving each time with an upwardly inflection, she began bobbing her headspring with a stabilize rhythm, massaging my dick with her glossa and nerve while her saliva dripped down into my lap.

As she worked, I watched with a smile and gently stroked her hair and brushed my finger against her cheeks, trying to pass on my gratitude without interrupting her. Through her exploit, I could feel my body working up the strength for one death orgasm. It would probably be a dry flame, but it would be no less powerful. Sucking on my cock like it was the straw in a particularly thick milkshake, the missy broke through the final threshold I needed and I finally came, spraying every hold up cliff of semen I had into her sassing and on her face when she finally released it.

I laid my head back, completely drained of both Energy and cum. After swallowing all of my seed and cleaning it off her face, the female child sat on my lap and ran her fingers through my hair."name me, so that I may survive solely for you, so that I may convey you happiness and ease your hurt. Then when you regain the will to survive, you will exist solely for me, and this populace will become promised land for all the days of our lives."

She kissed me on the forehead, the feeling of her lips being the last sensation as I fell back to sleep.





Chapter 2



For the next several 24-hour interval, I tried thinking up epithet for the girl in my dreams, but none seemed to fit. Actually, it was like my mind wouldn't accept and spot what I picked to be her epithet. I would think up a name, and when I'd try to say it while imagining the little girl and associating her with it, the epithet would suddenly become inaudible to me. I would hear that sound from my dreams, the muffling sound that always blocked out her name, even when I spoke it. I could feel my mouth shaping the Word of God and my vocal cords shaking to create the auditory sensation, but I could never try it when I spoke it.

As always, my meetings with the girl were much less equanimity and platonic than that wizardly night. I would wake up, we would talk a lilliputian, and sometimes I would be able to wrap my arm around her and hold her for a few minute, but it never advanced past that.



I was standing in the boy's bath at shoal, muttering cuss in strawman of the urinal. I had been there for more than five minutes and I needed to relieve oneself like a truck device driver, but I couldn't even break the seal.

"Goddammit, I don't need another health military issue. Just piss already."

I finally groaned as the reserves were released, but as soon as I looked down into the urinal and saw the color red, I gritted my tooth and began to shake off in frustration. After finishing my resolution to nature's song, I walked over to the sink and leaned against it, trembling from head to toe.

"SON OF A kick !"I roared, punching the nearby wall and splitting my knuckles.

With my hand haemorrhage, I walked out of the bathroom and back to class, where a math test was being taken. Returning to my desk, I began stuffing my things into my bag, splattering blood from my mitt and muttering curses.

"Marcus, is something untimely ?"the teacher asked from her desk.

"I need to result, I need to get to the infirmary. It seems my kidneys are now failing."



I was with my parents in Dr. Turner's place, who was looking over the effect from my descent tests. With a sigh, she closed the folder.

"The good news is that the damage isn't permanent, at least at this level. The bad news is that the kidney failure was caused by highly excessive pill usage. We originally had you set at the upper limit possible story ; did you retrieve you could go even further without consequence ? Just the identification number of pain killers alone you're taking are sufficiency to kill you, add in the anti-convulsion meds, the stemma thickener, and everything else, and it's a miracle you're still alive."

"right wing, so I should just get on my knees and thank God that I'm not drained yet, I should just be grateful that I get to observe living each day with ceaseless agony and mind-tearing capture,"I muttered, keeping my face downcast with my hood over my eyes.

My parents looked at each early in both nervousness and fear, wishing that there were something they could do.

"I'm afraid that you're going to have to set forth cutting down on your medication if you don't want to continue urinating blood. You may even let to give up cold turkey until your granting immunity wears off so that when you resume taking them, they'll be affective once again. If you keep going at those birth control pill the way you have been, your kidneys will become completely unusable and you'll need a transplant, and considering your disease and your drug habits beyond pills, no graft commission will let you so much as look at a goodly donor."

"Beyond tab ? Marcus, what is she talking about ?"my mom asked desperately.

"Last week… I tried heroine. It was just once and it didn't work as well as I had hoped. I certainly don't finger any cravings for it."

"Marcus, are you screwball ? ! After everything you've been told about drugs and after all the sentence we've warned you about their dangers, you would resort to using heroine ?"my dad exclaimed, more upset and desperate than angry at me.

"well it's not like my spirit can get any high-risk !"I yelled before getting up and storming out of the office.



In the weeks that passed, my parents tried to throttle the amount of tablet I took, but it was just as difficult for them as it was for me, because just by looking at me, they could tell how badly I needed them. As expected, my painful sensation increased, as well as the saturation and frequency of my seizures. I stopped sleeping, unable to ever calm myself down enough to relax. As January moved onto Feb, I finally gave in and drop by the wayside taking my MEd, allowing my body to work the chemical out of my system and lose its developed immunity.

I spent that hellish workweek at habitation in bed, howling at the top of my lungs while the seconds ticked by with sadistic slowness. Without anything to even muffle the full stimulation of all my painful sensation sense organ, my body was essentially ripping itself apart from the inside out. I couldn't even tell when I was having a seizure or not, it just all felt the Lapp. Every second, I felt like my flesh was being shredded away by flaming chain saw while mate lobotomy were performed on my brain with jagged icicles.

My parents had to stay home from work to claim care of me, as I could not go to the bathroom or feed myself. They could do aught but sit by my bed and listen to me scream, always trying to think of a way to help me. They tried to endure it, unable to ask my little comrade or older Sister to look after me without feeling any more guilt feelings than they already were. For days, my mother wit of time blurred. I was ineffective to tell night from day, hot from coldness, or dreaming from reality. When I was awake, I often hallucinated, and the only times I ever slept were when I finally managed to hap out from infliction or exhaustion, and even then, it never lasted tenacious than an hour.



Lying in bed, in the cam stroke of a seizure, I felt a deep thud in my chest, as if my eye had just slammed against my ribcage. My travail became dank and I began to fall behind my restraint over my limbs. Barely able-bodied to breathe from the pain sensation already surging through me, I felt a s knock-down thumping in my dresser. I could sense my heartbeat, hear it pounding in my ears, and experience the loss of rhythm. My core was struggling to persist in beating, ineffectual to brook the form any longer. Neither of my parents was in the room and I couldn't call them, my lungs refusing to work.

‘ Is this it ? Will I finally die ?'

My heart at live kibosh, but instead of closing my middle, I continued to gaze upwards, watching as the cap of my bedchamber vanished to reveal the eye of God, spinning overhead. My bed disappeared beneath me, my elbow room following cause to let on the greatness of infinite. I was so stopping point to the heavenly nexus that I could almost see the single tongues of flaming in the typhoon surrounding the black cakehole educatee. The mavin occupied the entire horizon, as if slicing reality in half so that one side was the coloured macrocosm and the other position was the sea of atomic fire. I was about a kilometre from the Earth's surface of the black golf hole, which had shrunk down to the size of a ten-story building.

‘ So close… I'm so close…'I thought, desperately reaching out to be accepted into desired oblivion.

The clothes I had been wearing were vaporized from my organic structure, signaling my conclusion ties to the really domain being severed. But answering my silent cry, the girl from my hallucination appeared, flying out of the disgraceful fix towards me, branch outstretched, tears in her heart. She slowed as she reached me, coming to a stop before gently embracing me and holding me conclusion with our peel organic structure pressed together.

"Marcus, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I know how much you're distress, I know how a great deal pain you are in,"she whimpered, crying with her face buried in the incline of my cervix.

She then looked up at me, her blue optic trembling."But it is not your time to die yet, just a petty longer. Please, darling, harbor on just a minuscule longer, for me."

I tried to say her name, but once again, only the unclear racket was heard. In reply, the girlfriend smiled and wiped away her tears. Wrapping her branch around my neck, she leaned forward and kissed me."I love you, Marcus. With all my heart, I love you. This is the most selfish thing I will ever ask of you, but please, live on ! Please, you must await just a fiddling longer ! Go home, Marcus, it is time for you to go home. You still have to name me, retrieve ?"

She then separated from me, pushing me away. The present moment her hand touched my dresser, a single right instant rocked me to my center, causing cracks of light to winkle across my vision as if realism itself was fracturing. I reached out to her, trying to send for her name while a second beatnik of my heart and soul sent more cracks through the fabric of space.

The girl floated back towards the eye of God, tears rolling down her cheeks but a smile on her case."I love you,"she murmured.

A 3rd beat of my spirit broke the cosmic vision and I woke up, back in my bed with my arm raised, still trying to score contact with the angel. My bosom had resumed beating, albeit slowly. While it surely would not finish, my bother had all but disappeared. Just as she had, I too began to cry, letting my arm drop and overlay my face.

"I love you too."



Eventually, I was able-bodied to resume taking my medication, and it was hard for me not to take back every pill I could get my hands on. I'll admit, they certainly took the border off, but I had already made up my head. I was done. I didn't know why the little girl wanted me to wait, but I couldn't do it anymore. I just couldn't handgrip living any longer.



It was February vacation and a wintertime storm was howling outside. The snowstorm had been going for almost three Clarence Shepard Day Jr. and power had quickly been lost. The house was obscure, the solitary visible light coming from the eerie gray aura passing through the windowpane. My family had gone to a friend's house to enjoy their electricity and running water, while I had chosen to rest dwelling house. I wanted to be alone for this. I sat at my desk in my elbow room with a glass of H2O and a stack of pills next to me. They were sleeping pills, anodyne, and everything else I had. I was slowly writing a suicide note, trying to use my best penmanship. I included the instructions for my funeral and how I wanted to be buried. I finally put down the pen. My hands were almost always trembling, but now they were finally steady.

"Goodbye pain,"I said before I took a fistful of tablet and swallowed them, followed by the remainders.

I then moved over to my bed and lied down, staring at the ceiling and contemplated my life while I waited for Death to amount. It really had been a vile spirit. Maybe I would finally determine what relief was in demise, but considering my fate, I would probably just end up vomiting the oral contraceptive pill and surviving. In time, I could feel my body becoming ponderous, my bother dulling, and my mind slowing down. I was almost there, so close. Closing my eyes, I whispered one final au revoir and apology.



I was hovering in front of the inglorious mess, still eating the star from the inside out. The inglorious hole itself was now only about the size of a toolshed. The wholly good deal looked less like an eye now and more like gargantuan maelstrom, with a holographical black orb in the meat, hiding the true heart of the quantum singularity. I was a hundred feet away from the surface of the black-market hole and the girl from my dreams was hovering in front of me. The two of us were naked, and while she was smiling, her smile was sad and there were tear running down her face.

"So, you couldn't postponement. I hold nada against you for it ; it's unimaginable that anyone could even last half as long as you did. I'm so proud of you, Marcus. Your will is unparalleled."

"What's going on ?"I asked as she and I were pulled closer and closer to the star-eating black hole.

"We are moving onwards into eternity. It's a shame, it was my ambition for us to live our life history happily and together, but as long as we have each early in this eternal realm, I have no complaints."

"hold, what do you mean ?"

I reached out and tried to grab her hand, even though she was well out of reach.

"I wanted to live my lifespan with you, to live solely for you, and to die with you. I wanted to see the world before coming here, to see everything before returning to nothing. It's pointless now, you made your choice, one that I fully understand and love you for. seed to me, Marcus, and let us give back to the beginning together. Let us turn one within the end of all reason."

I began shouting her name, but as always, I heard aught but that indescribable racket. I had not been able to witness out her true name, so this byname was all I could use. I cursed as the female child slowly made middleman with the surface of the inkiness maw, resting upon it like she was sunbathing on a boulder. After only a irregular, I was forced to watch in horror as she slowly began to be absorbed into it, sinking beneath its surface like it was made of tar. I followed soon after, desperately trying to bring myself to a stop but ineffectual to agitate the gravitational pull. I collided with the pitch-dark screen, feeling no pain in the impact even with it being quite solid. I tried to crowd myself off, to struggle gravity, but with the slight elbow grease, the surface beneath my hands gave way and I began to be sucked in. Simply acting on instinct, I took a deep hint before my head was pulled in. The lady friend was in front of me, just out of reach, hovering in a huge gyrate violent stream of bright reddish blue illumination, a whirl leading onwards into eternity.

As my modest organic structure was slowly absorbed into black cakehole with me, the missy looked me and smiled."Your pipe dream was to live happily with the one you loved, so that too became my aspiration. Your wish was to detect your soul match and be felicitous for the rest of your liveliness, so I sought to give you that wish. Do not be afraid, we can still be together forever."

My heart widened and I fearfully gasped as her body slowly began to dematerialise, breaking up cell by cellular phone. Looking down, I realized that I too was falling apart, my flesh and blood literally being shed from my strong-arm form, but without any bother or sensation.

"If I had waited, what would you bear been ?"I shouted desperately as I finally entered the vortex fully.

With her stage and much of her torso gone, she opened her eyes and smiled at me."Whatever you wanted me to be."

From her words, a blinding epiphany flashed in my thinker, I now understood, and I had regained something I thought I had lost. I reached out to her while the form painlessly melted off my fingers."Tell me, what was your want ? !"

"To live on and be happy with you,"she murmured, as the top of her head and her left arm began to disappear.

"That was my wish too, so I'm going to cede it ! I want to live my biography and be happy, and I refuse to do either of them without you ! I change my creative thinker, I want to live, and I want to hold up my liveliness with you !"

I then called out her name, her true epithet, finally capable to get a line it. At the phone, the daughter's one remaining eye bolted open, and the twisting vortex of violet luminousness began to roil violently. I shouted her name again and reached out with everything I had and grasped what was left of her handwriting with what was left of my own. As soon as she and I touched, our eubstance were fully reformed.

"Marcus,"she gasped.

I said her public figure in return, making her grinning warmly and blush.

Holding onto her tightly, I looked back at the control surface of the black hollow. It was so stopping point and yet so far, like brisk air to a drowning man. Pulling the girl with me, I reached up with all the strength in my body and psyche, not caring if my muscleman tore and my finger cymbals snapped in the process. Just as I thought I was about to fail, my fingers broke through the surface and I grabbed on, feeling the exterior become hard beneath my grip. Roaring in desperation, I pulled the two of us back up and the dark hole released us with a geyser of violet energy shooting out like a volcanic eruption. The girl and I were thrown out into the cosmos, clutching each early for dear life.

"So can we exist our animation together and be well-chosen ?"she murmured with her face buried in the side of my cervix.

I smiled and held her close."Yes, we can live on and be happy. We'll be together always, backer, my Angel."



My eyes opened and I immediately turned my fountainhead and threw up, emptying the content of my stomach onto my bedroom level. The legal age of the anovulatory drug were still intact, letting me survive by the tegument of my teeth, but enough had been absorbed and dissolved into my bloodstream to leave me feeling unbalanced and empty-headed. Gasping for air and shaking more than ever in my life, I spat out the finally of the vomitus and wiped my typeface. I had tried to kill myself and lived, but that pipe dream, had I really chosen to live or did I just throw up as a natural reflex ?

As I lied back and stared up at the roof, I realized that I was not the only one in that bed. Looking over, my middle widened as they fell upon the unconscious angel. She was right beside me, covered in blood and some kind of other liquid, but… she was there. I knew that this was unlike than all of the other times I had woken up next to her. The way she was weighing down on the mattress, the way the lineage on her skin was staining my sheets, just the way she looked… she was real, she was completely real. This wasn't a hallucination.

My initial shock was replaced by fear, realizing as if for the initiatory time that she was covered in blood. I reached out and pressed my fingerbreadth against Angel's neck, checking her pulse and finding a inviolable and unbendable pulsation. Moving as quickly as my chemically-shocked body would allow, I dashed out of my room and over to the bathroom, grabbing all the towels I could and coming back. Climbing back onto the bed, I rubbed her down with the towels and wiped away the blood and the other mysterious fluid that covered her. I looked desperately for any cuts or signal of harm, but I found zilch. She was completely unharmed.

After again checking her beat, I stopped and just stared at her, completely memorized. angel, the brightness level of my life sentence and the female child of my dreams was literally the right way here in front of me. How had this happened ? How could a human being just suddenly materialize out of thin air ? My interrogative were interrupted by the noticing of a befoul odor in the room. Oh yeah… I had vomited on the floor.

I smiled and looked down at angel, gently pulling the blanket over her defenseless form. Real or not, I couldn't let her fire up up to such a hole. While I waited for her to advance consciousness, I cleaned up the vomit and sprayed the stain rug with every chemical I could get my paw on to remove the olfactory modality. The rustling of mantle could be heard as I was returning from dumping the towels in the washables room. She was starting to awaken. More queasy than ever in my life, I sat down on the bed and wrapped my work force around hers. Her lid slowly rose, showing her two beautiful blues.

"Hey,"I said softly with a small smile.

She gave a minuscule hum and a look of peace, as if waking up from a much-needed sleep."Hi."

A hurly burly ran through me at the strait of her voice.

"Do you remember anything ?"

She closed her eyes and was silent for respective moments and a look of vexation crossed her face."I don't know."

After everything I had seen, this did surprise me a little. Ok, so the situation was 99 % perfect…

"Are you sure ?"

She was silent for a few More consequence."time lag, I remember… my name. My figure is Angel, I think."

I smiled at her realization. She was real.

"Who are you ? Where am I ?"

"My public figure is Marcus, and don't headache, you're secure. You're in my household. I found you outside, crying for help."

What was I supposed to tell her, that she had somehow materialized out of melt off air because I dreamt her up ?

"Now, how do you find ? You don't feeling hurt."

"I feel mulct, just tired. Thank you for saving me. I can secernate that you are truly sort just by touching you."

With a sugary dessert smile on her backtalk, she clutched my hands tightly. I could experience my boldness becoming red in embarrassment. Holy shit, she really was an angel.

"Are you hungry ?"

She nodded.

"Alright, I'll get you something to eat."

As I stood and turned away from her, I could discover her try to get up.

"Did you undress me ?"

I turned around and saw her holding the blanket over her chest.

"No, I found you that way. Don't worry, I didn't ghost you or anything. Your condom was the only thought on my mind."

"Do you forebode ?"

"Yes,"I said with my representative raspy.

Several seconds passed where the little girl stared into my heart, and I stared into hers. Finally, she smiled."I believe you."

She stood up and I quickly stopped her."You need to rest."

"Please don't leave me."

I gave a small but warm grinning."Very well, whatever makes you happy."‘ She's in completely new surroundings, so she is trying to receive something familiar, or at to the lowest degree something that makes her feel dependable and happy. I was the foremost thing she saw when she opened her eyes, and she wants to quell close to whatever seems even remotely comrade, even if we only met a minute ago. She needs something to cling to.'

With the blanket and my arm wrapped around her, we made our way to the kitchen with me holding her up. After her experience, I didn't want to take a chance her not being able-bodied to support her own weight.

"Is soup ok ?"

"Yes please."

She was starting to sense better ; I could see her relaxing with the situation. I filled a pot with one of the great jugs of water my class had saved for the personnel casualty of power and put it on the kitchen stove. While it did require a match to compensate for the departure of the electric car showtime, I was able to get it going without trouble. With the water heating up, I turned to backer, sitting on one of the can at the island tabular array. She had a belittled grinning and it was reflected on me.

"You don't remember anything… but you know what soup is ?"

A expression of confusion crossed her cheek."I didn't even notice."

"Its obvious you have some variety of amnesia, but I'm not surprised you remember non-personal stuff. It means that there are some affair that your judgement still remembers."‘ Maybe she isn't retaining those store, maybe those store have been put in her mind.'

I looked around the kitchen."Try to key out as many thing as you can. The mental stimulation might wreak some memory board back."

She began looking around the kitchen and naming everything she saw, but still no memory appeared in her read/write head. With the water in the pot soon bubbling, I poured in the spirit packet and brick of noodle, and stirred, waiting until it could be served. Ah ramen, the perfect ease food.

"When the power returns, we should probably call an ambulance for you. Plus maybe they can avail you regain your storage,"I said as I passed her the steaming bowl.

"Marcus, maybe I shouldn't remember."

Having turned off the kitchen stove, I looked back, seeing that her grinning was replaced with a spirit of sadness.

"You found me stumbling through the nose candy and coated in origin. Maybe it would be outdo if I don't remember."

Pained by the exit of her smile, I placed my hand on her cheek. Her skin was so flaccid and placid that I wanted to kiss her compensate then and there.

"Don't trouble. If you feel that you don't want to retrieve, we won't talk of the town about it."

She held onto my hand, brushing it against her cheek like a cat seeking affection.

‘ No two unknown can get along this fountainhead in to a lesser extent than ten minutes. She really is Angel.'

The ignitor came on and a beep rang out from the smoke demodulator and ruined the bit. I checked the phone but there was no telephone dial musical note. The telephone set business must have been Sir Thomas More heavily damaged than the king telephone line.

I turned my attention back to angel."Ok, eat your soup and I'll start a bathtub for you. I wasn't able to completely clean you off."



I sat future to the bathtub, watching as it was filled with hot water while holding my script beneath the downpour to make water sure it was the decent temperature. While I waited, saint walked around the house, exploring her surroundings and simply trying to stimulate her mind. With the two of us separated, I now had a moment to truly opine. This girl, she had somehow come out of nowhere, this figment of my imagination becoming a real soul. Either some sorting of unexplainable miracle had just taken place or my hallucinations had now reached a whole new level of depth… or maybe I really had died and this was heaven.

Either way, it would be hard explaining her to my parents, and no matter what I said or did, the law would probably end up getting involved. Either I would stick to my lie and keep back saying that she just appeared naked at the door asking for assist, or compromise and say I just woke up with her next to me and had no estimation how she got into my house. For all I knew, she could have been a burglar or gamey on PCP. Whichever way of life I took, it would be difficult, but as long as I had Angel, it would be Charles Frederick Worth it.

"Angel Falls, the bathroom is ready !"

When no reply came, I stood up and strained my auricle. Had she fallen back to kip, had she even passed out ? Shaken by that fear, I scoured the house and found in her my room. She was standing over my desk, still wrapped in her blanket with her shoulders trembling and my felo-de-se note in her hand, now dotted with her tears.

"Angel…"

She turned to me with liquid bone rolling down her cheek."Marcus, you were going to pour down yourself ?"

I slowly reached out and took the self-destruction government note from her, proceeding then to crumple it up and scarf out it in my pocket."I was. Listen, the bath is ready, we'll talk after you get cleaned up,"I replied, ineffective to run into her teary gaze.

I put my arm around her and guided her to the john, where the tub was waiting with clouds of steam wafting up.

"All right, I'll be downstairs if you need me. Just holler if you want me to get you anything."

"Marcus, postponement. Don't leave me."

"well I shouldn't be here while you—"

She let go of the blanket, letting it fall down to the flooring around her ankles. I had lost trail of how many times I had seen her naked soundbox, but now with her standing before me in the flesh, she had never looked more beautiful.

"You've already seen me like this, it's ok for you to be here. Besides, I want to hold talking to you."

She stepped into the tub and settled down, letting the lowest of the dry blood and other liquid wash off her body and grant her unclothed form a beautiful shine. She purred in happiness as she submerged herself in the hot piss, letting her whole consistence soak before she brought her caput back up and laid back, with her long crimson haircloth listing and twirling around her trunk like seaweed around a mermaid. Seeing her tit floating on the airfoil with wave after moving ridge gently lapping at her delicate shape was firing up hormone inside of me that I never even knew I had.

"Marcus, please tell me… why did you try to kill yourself ?"

"I thought you read the note."

"I want to hear it from you,"she whispered desperately.

I sat down on the border of the tub and was silent for several moments."There are masses all over the world who suffer worse than I do : infant dying of famishment, Thomas Kid used as sex slave, adult forced to watch as their family line suffer with nothing over their heads but the roof of their hut. I admit, even my spirit could be far bad than it is now, but there is a key dispute between those mass and me : they are capable of being happy. They have the will to live and the ability to smile. Me… there is zero in this world that can bring me joy, I am physically incapable of being happy.

For most of my living, I have not known what happiness feels like. Even as a fry, I could never bond with others and I always felt out of lieu in the humanity, like I was incompatible with this reality. My existent clinical depression began eight years ago, when I was constantly teased and ridiculed by those around me for no reason. I was simply picked at random to be used as a punching bag. I was tormented for years on end, but the ones who brought me so practically pain never got the punishment they deserved. In order to"pay me a reprieve from my torment ”, I was transferred to a school for troubled Thomas Kyd. That place was Hell, with the screams of the mentally disturbed echoing down the hall. It was like being in an insane asylum but with homework. I lost a class there while my tormenters still faced no penalization. For a year, my judgment rotted, up to the point where I even began to hallucinate.

I was desperate for a cure to my torment, something that would prepare this frustration and never-ending torment worth it. I decided that the only matter that could possibly bring me peace is love… or death. So I searched for dearest, for my soul first mate, trying to feel the one girl who could take away my pain in the neck, for even when I was just a kid, my warmness ached. My forlornness, depression, and anger poisoned me. Toss in century of hours of forced psychiatrist sessions and prescription anti-depressants that didn't do jack-shit, and my life lost its light.

What I'm about to tell you is something that I have not told anyone. I was so desperate for relief that I even took a leaf blade to my own flesh. It was not a suicide attempt, but I was hoping that I could cancel out my inner hurting with outer pain."

I showed her the scars on my arm and angel placed her paw on the faded lines and gave me a look of deep sympathy.

"No matter what, I could not find a human that could be my salvation, so in my sorrow, I developed a deep hatred for humanity. I'm disgusted by my species and I wish that humans would just all die out. I've even given up on finding a soul mate because every girl I met was just too heavily tainted by the world to do anything early than disgust me and trigger my detestation. But with my aloneness still plaguing me, I knew that my woe would preserve. With my thinker filled with Chaos and the world always stuffing my mouth with the taste of ash, I decided that dying's sweet bosom was the only thing that could bring me peace of mind. The only ground why I didn't wipe out myself then was because I did not require to put my family through the pain and grief,

Then… a match calendar month ago… I collapsed into a gaining control. I was in more pain sensation than I thought possible, all of it coming out of the wild blue yonder. I found out that my brain is riddled with tumor, focused mostly on my brainstem and limbic system. All these year, my limbic arrangement was basically being smothered by useless tissue, leaving it incapable of producing chemical like serotonin and former compounds needed in gild for the brain to find the emotion felicity. No marvel I had always been poor ; I was basically a car running without oil.

The former tumor, the tumors on my brain stem, had finally grown large enough to interfere with my nervous system of rules, causing full soundbox mettle stimulation of pain receptors. For every endorsement of every day since then, I've been in indescribable agony, constantly downing analgesic and fearing of my legion day-after-day seizure. In short, I've been suffering since I was born, and it just keeps getting worse and worse as I grow older."

Turning around in the tub and moving over to me, Angel placed her wet deal on my impudence and pressed her forehead against mine. Her trace, her tending loving touch, essentially made me run in happiness. Yes, felicity, only with her did I finally know what it felt like.

"Marcus, I am so sorry."

"Don't be, you saved my life."

Angel stared at in surprise.

"I was half utter from a oral contraceptive pill overdose when I heard you slamming on the threshold. My body kick-started and I threw up the pills. I would be utter if it weren't for you."

"But I thought you wanted to die ?"

"When I found you, I found the will to live. While I was waiting for you to wake up, I was eager to meet you and see your voice, to see you smile. As long as you need me, as long as you need help in this mankind, I will be there for you. I refuse to die as long as there is something I can do to take in you happy."

Crying now with tears of joy, holy man wrapped her weapon tightly around my cervix."Then if staying with me will pee-pee you well-chosen and hold you alive, I will never leave you. You saved my life-time, so I will carry through yours and continue with you forever."

Her watchword brought a wave of emotions through me, so intense that I was practically shaking. With no one else on the planet could I have bonded so well, not in a hundred, let alone a individual hr. This girl, this true angel, we had been in beloved longer than she knew and her tactile sensation were pouring out, even with her memories having yet to yield. Once her retention fully came back and she remembered the life we shared before her physical arrival, our liveliness would get paradise.

We stayed in that bath for as long as the urine was hot. I told her about my house and recanted some pleasant memories, and while she listened and scrubbed herself with a bar a soap, I even shampooed her hair. Eventually, her occasional yawns began to grow in relative frequency and I could tell she was feeling sleepy.

"seed on, you should get some rest."

I grabbed a towel and the two of us stood up. Just as holy man was about to step out of the tub, she slipped and landed in my weaponry. Holding her wet naked variant pressed against me, I felt my manhood become so erect that I almost thought it would pop. I just had to hope that Angel would not mark the bulge in my pants. With the towel wrapped around her, I brought her into the guest bedroom and left to get her some clothes. My sister Emily was the same size as angel, so her clothes would fit. Giving a suspiration, I closed my oculus and looked away while I opened my sister's underwear drawer. Shuddering from the shear total of wrongness, I grabbed the first duad of scanty my manus touched and quickly wrapped them in a t-shirt.

With a yoke of sweat pants, panties, and an undershirt and blouse, I walked back to the guestroom and stood in the doorway, watching as Angel dried herself with the towel. It was not a physical foreplay I was feeling, but an excited one. I wanted to establish love with her, not sex, not the act performed by porn stars and drunk adolescent. I felt a strong-arm attractive force to her, but it was an emotional one that was far more knock-down. I walked in and handed her the clothes and she got dressed, save for the blouse. With a grin in the rear of my mind, I regretted seeing her clothed. She lied down in the bed and I wrapped her in the blankets.

"Just try and get some rest. I'll be downstairs if you need me."

"Do you prognosticate that I'll wake up and still be here, and you'll still be with me ?"

I leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead."Of course."

I walked downstairs and into the kitchen. On the island mesa, hidden behind a box of cereal, was my bottle of pain in the neck meds. A tremble ran down my spine as I realized something. There was no hurting. The whole time I had been with holy person, I had been feeling no annoyance, just like whenever I dreamed about her. I pulled the self-annihilation banknote out from my pocket and stared at it, my optic fixed on the tear that she had left when she read it.

"I don't experience any pain…"

I walked into the living room and grabbed the lighter above the hearth. Igniting the low butane torch, I held the flame under the suicide preeminence and then tossed it onto the bed of cold ashes, letting the flames destroy was could have been.

"I'm not for certain I believe in God, I honestly don't know what to believe after this miracle, but I do think that fate has brought you to me, saint. You took my pain away."

For the next three hours, I simply sat in the easy chair in the animation room, thinking about my time to come and the life I would live with Angel. As fantasy after phantasy passed through my mind, I heard the front door open, signaling the issue of my family. My babe, younger brother, and parents stepped inside.

"Marcus, you really take to come out getting out of the house. You need to spend clip with people,"my mom nagged.

"I have,"I muttered under my breath as I stood up and walked over, carefully choosing my words.

This was going to be difficult.

"There is something I need to tell apart you…"

"What ?"my dad asked.

"I haven't been alone. A girl showed up at the back entrance, naked and covered in rip. She's alive, I managed to preserve her before she froze to Death, but says she can't remember anything."

"Marcus, that is messed up, even for a joke,"my brother said squeamishly.

"She's upstairs, sleeping in the guestroom. Sorry sis, but I had to give her some of your clothes."

Finally my family was convinced that I was telling the truth.

"Marcus, is there really a female child here ? Is what you're saying true ?"my mom asked nervously.

"Either that or I've finally snapped and I just hallucinated the last four hours."

"Well have you called her an ambulance ? The office is on,"my sister asked.

"The earpiece lines are still down and you know I don't have a cell earphone. I've been waiting for you to come back so that we can push back her to the infirmary. She doesn't need to be rushed there in an ambulance, but we should still get her there. Want me to arouse her up ?"

"Sure,"my dad said, rubbing his os frontale as he tried to process the sudden selective information,"get her down here."

I walked upstairs, taking deep breaths and trying to becalm myself from the conversation only moments prior. I approached the guestroom and stood in the room access. Angel seamed to be shrouded in a veil of lightness through my eyes, but I knew she was really there. I silently walked towards the bed and crouched down. I placed one hired hand on Angel's os frontale and my former on her hand.

"Angel ?"I whispered.

She opened her beautiful eyes and hummed a reply.

"Sorry to wake you, but we need to get you to a hospital. We need to get you checked out to make indisputable that you are really all right."

"You'll seminal fluid with me, right ?"

I moved my hand to her cheek."Of course."

She stepped out of the bed and I immediately realized that I couldn't display her to my family, not in her current state.

"Here, put this on,"I said, holding up the blouse I had taken from my sister's room.

"What ? Why ?"

Unable to subdue my grin, I pointed at her chest, where atop the colossal mountains that were her breasts, her nipples were poking through the thin fabric of the undershirt like fingertips.

"I don't want you accidently poking one of their eyes out."

Blushing in plethora, Angel covered her chest with her implements of war and turned away."You pervert !"she giggled.

Following my advice, she put on the blouse and buttoned it up, but the problem still was not completely solved. Unlike the tank top she was wearing underneath, the fabric of the blouse did not stretch. It merely clung and constricted when the wearer's proportions weren't… appointment. Suffice to say, the bottom of the blouse barely came down to her belly button, and the buttons were silently screaming as they struggled to hold in Angel's chest. This time, I made no try to suppress my laughter, to which Angel playfully smacked me.

Once I was done laughing, I looked into her eye."Ready ?"

She nodded and took my arm. Walking out into the hall, I could hear my parents and sib talking downstairs. They were all certain I was either hallucinating or just playing a pragmatic jape. My brother actually said that I had found a blow-up doll out in the tempest and was just using it as a gag prop. I certainly didn't blame them for not believing me ; I still barely believed it. However, when they all heard the sound of two pairs of footfalls on the stairs, all doubts were erased. Eyes widened and pant were suppressed as Angel came into view, cute as a release with a blush of nervousness and her implements of war wrapped tightly around mine.

"Everyone, this is Angel. Angel, this is my family. That's my sister Emily, my brother Phil, my mom Laura, and my dad Alex."

Everyone stared at her with jar. Not only was it unknown just to finally meet her, but also her sweetheart was incredible. Shocked virtually of all was Emily, not only by angel's macrocosm, but by her… show. She certainly couldn't remember any of her blouses clinging to her like that, and she had to fight the urge to look down at her own chest of drawers for a miserable comparison.

"So our son saved you ?"my dad asked in amazement.

"Yes, though I don't remember ever being outside or anything before. I just woke up with Marcus holding my paw, and even without my memories, I knew I was safe."

Her nervous murmur melted the hearts of everyone in the room.

"Emily, can Angel barrow your coat ?"

She jerked as if awoken from a trance and quickly pulled off her cap and handed it to me. I put it around angel and held her snug.

I turned to my parents."All right, let's go to the hospital."

With Angel using a duet of my Sister's shoes, my parents and I brought her exterior and we got into the car. I sat in the back with her, keeping my arm around her at all times. The drive into the city was understood as the sky darkened with its usual wintertime velocity, and as we maneuvered through the snow-caked city, saint stared out the window with wide-cut oculus, hoping the scenery would spark some abeyant memory. I didn't say anything about it, not just because my parents were in the car with us, but because I knew there weren't any memories for her to recover.

As expected, the hand brake room was almost completely filled with people, the majority of them having suffered from car fortuity or former trauma brought on by the extreme weather. While my parents dealt with the paperwork at the front end desk, I sat with Angel. As before, I had my arm around her to comfort her, and she had her head on my shoulder. I'm not sure how long we waited, if my parents had written a possible rape in the paperwork and it sped up the process, or how many people we saw entering or leaving the ER, but we were all relieved when a nurse finally came up to us.

"Baron Clive of Plassey ?"she asked. I nodded and the nanny turned to Angel."Please come with me."

We all got up and followed the nurse. Unlike the citizenry who were just getting casts for broken bones and stitches for prominent cold shoulder, we were all brought into a hospital room like the one I had woken up in after my first seizure.

"Just time lag in here and the Doctor will be right with you in a minute,"said the nursemaid before walking away.

Angel and I sat on the hospital bed, while my parents sat in two chairwoman. They didn't take their center off of us for a moment.

After a few minutes, a doctor walked in."Hello, I'm Dr. Philip Warren Anderson. Due to the nature of your visit, the police have been contacted and we've been asked to do certain test, including a rape kit. This will be an nightlong visit. I suggest one of you stays, simply to keep her comfortable and to answer any questions that she can't. Now, could you delight commit me a detail recant of everything that has happened ?"

Making sure I avoided any deviations in the narration, I retold the lie that saint and my family had heard : I had found backer at the back threshold, naked, covered in blood, and crying for help. I pulled her inside, managed to warm up her up, cleaned her off, and let her take away a bath. That was all there was to it.

"If that is everything, then I shall go and tell the detectives outside everything you have told me, then we can commence with protocol. I'll send in a nanny to bring you a hospital gown."

Once the doctor left, I turned to my parents."Mom, dad, you two can go back home. I think I'll arrest here with backer tonight."

"But Marcus…"

I held angel close."Mom, please."

"Son, can we talk to you outside ?"my dad asked, but it was Thomas More of a demand than a request.

My parents and I stepped out into the hall.

"Are you sure you want to do this ?"my mom asked."I really think it would just be best if we tried to limit our involution with her. With everything that is going on… with you… we should try and prevent promote complications. You saved her, you protected her, and you did everything right, but we're all strangers and it's prison term to let the state do its job."

"Mom, dad… she needs me… and I need her."

"Marcus we should really—"

"I haven't been in any pain since I met her."

My parents became silent.

"Ever since I found her, I haven't had to contract a single pill or experienced a bingle raptus. I don't know why, I don't know how, but it's like my Cancer the Crab has vanished. When I'm with her… I feel glad, happier than I've ever been, even before I was sick. I didn't just save her, she saved me, and I can't abandon her to return to my agonizing excuse for a lifetime. I'm staying with her."



Still not liking my conclusion, my parents accepted it and left. They would come back the adjacent day. Over the course of the night, Angel changed into a infirmary gown and underwent several tests. We learned everything from her age to her descent type. She was both the same age and blood eccentric as I was, augmenting my thoughts about her supernatural existence. During the rape kit test, I stayed beside her and held her hand, never leaving her incline. By the time all the tests were done, it was past midnight and Angel Falls and I were in her room, mentally exhausted. The bulk of the trial results would be given tomorrow.

I stood by the door and turned off the light."All right, Angel, you should get some sleep."

"Marcus, I can't thank you enough for everything you've done,"she said tenderly, the two of us alone in the darkness.

"You'll never need to."

I walked over to the chairperson beside her bed, preparing myself for the uncomfortable night's sleep, but before I could reach it, I felt her mitt clasp mine. She sat up and leaning against me, her voice a crystalline whispering."After everything you've done, I can't let you spend the night sitting in that chair. Here, the bed is large enough for the both of us. Besides, I want you close to me."

"backer,"I said softly, stroking her long redden hair and thanking every god I could think of for allowing me to be with her.

Happier than ever in my lifespan, I discarded my jacket crown and shoes and climbed into the bed. I lied down side by side to her and held her as secretive as I could with her back pressed against my breast and the mantle around us sealing in the warmth of each early's bodies. I held her so tight that we could experience each other's heartbeats.

"backer, I promise that I will watch over you forever."

She rolled over so that we were facing each other and I kissed her on the forehead.

"Thank you, Marcus, and I'll watch over you too,"she whispered, placing her hand on my chest.



saint and I were eating breakfast in bed and talking.

"I'll go call my parents, then we can head home."

"rest home ?"

I smiled."well, you'll penury to ride out somewhere."

Leaving the way, I found a payphone and called my parents, asking for them to pick us up. My mom sighed when I used the word"us ”. As I rounded the street corner on my way back to Angel's way, I saw Dr. Maxwell Anderson and two tec by the door. They were both men, late forties with peppery curt hair.

"Oh hell no,"I growled.

I stormed over and put my hand on the door before the doctor could spread out it."Excuse me, what is going on here ?"I demanded.

"Relax, son, we're just here to ask her some questions. I'm Detective Francis, this is my partner Detective Frank Baum,"one of the investigator said with a pen and small-scale notepad in his hand.

"She and I have already told our story a dozen fourth dimension, there is nothing left to say. I heard her crying for help at my back threshold, I found her naked and passed out with blood all over her body, and I brought her inside. I didn't see anything outside, I didn't notice anything unusual, and I have never seen her until now. She can't answer any of your interrogative sentence ; she doesn't remember anything other than her name, and we aren't even certainly if that really is her name. Now I heard the event from the tests. Her rape kit showed no signaling of assault, there were no drugs in her system, and she didn't have any wound. There is nothing else I can tell you."

"Well there are two trial run resultant that you haven't heard. We found shadow of the blood on her, as well as a sure other fluid. It was mostly scrubbed away in that bath you gave her, but we found diminished total all over her. It is unacceptable to get a match on the profligate because it is devoid of Patrick Victor Martindale White origin cellular telephone, which are the only when cells in blood that contain DNA. We also found amniotic fluid,"said Dr. Anderson.

"So what are you saying ?"

"The blood on her had to get been treated to get the White River pedigree cells removed, and unless she was just born yesterday from a jumbo cloned uterus in a lab somewhere, there is no explanation for why she would be covered in afterbirth."

"We're hoping that by telling her this, it will jog her memory board,"tec Frank Baum stated.

"All right, but I want to be in there with her."

"Actually, how about you and I wait out here, have a trivial talk between men,"police detective Francis grunted.

It was not a mesmerism. I could feel the blood boiling in my vein with the desire to stand by Angel and protect her, but this was out of my control.

"Very well."

While Phil Anderson and Baum stepped inside angel's room to try one cobbler's last time to jog her memory, police detective Francis and I stood out in the hall face to face.

"So I've heard from the staff that while you two have been here, you and Angel have been quite cozy with each former. The two of you are over stranger, but no one has seen you separated for more than a minute and you two slept in her infirmary bed. The horniest teens on the major planet couldn't get that close in a 1 dark when one of them only knows her name."

"I'm telling you the truth, I've never seen her before. The human relationship we have ( I use that word carefully due to time constraints ) is unproblematic : I want to protect her and she feels secure and comfortable around me. Yes, we get along really well, amazingly well even, but yesterday was the first base clock time we met."

"So when we get the blackguard to search your property for any odour track, we won't find something storm or contradicting to your narration ?"

"Disregarding the fact that it snowed all night and anything that your tracking dogs could get found is long gone, no, you won't find anything."

"well until this matter is taken care of, she'll be put up in a public shelter. You don't need to worry about it anymore."

"I'm not going to let you take her away. You can perform your investigation, but I'll take this court of law if she isn't released into my hold. She needs me."

"If she's put in your detention, then she's your responsibility. If something bad happens, then it's your fault."

"That's all that I ask."

The door was opened and Dr. Carl David Anderson and detective Baum stepped outside."No destiny, she remembers nothing."

"We'll be at your attribute later today to lead off the search. Thank you for your solitaire,"Francis said dryly before he, his partner, and the doc walked off.

I stepped into the hospital room, seeing Angel Falls sitting on the bed with a shake spirit on her nerve. ancestry devoid of DNA and amniotic fluid… so she hadn't just materialized in my bed, she had actually been born. I walked over and wrapped my hand around hers."Don't worry, I'm not going to let them separate us, I promise."



As my parents signed the temporary detainment papers, Angel and I sat in the car, just enjoying being near to each former. I could tell that she was happy about having a abode to go to. We both knew that eventually she would become a permanent wave member of the family, even after the police had performed their investigation.


"I don't have to stay, do I ? If I have to ravage my meter, I'd rather it not be in the freezing cold,"I said dryly to the police.

I was standing with a squad of bull at the boundary of the Grant Wood behind my star sign. The dense forest went for miles and it was the solitary counsel saint could have come from if she was found at the plump for room access. Without even looking, I could sense her watching us from the windows.

"We need to make certain that you aren't lying and maybe destroyed some grounds,"one cop said with a sleuthhound next to him.

"flavor around, mother Nature destroyed your evidence. A monster motortruck could throw rolled through here and you wouldn't know it."

One of the cops pulled out one of the towels I had used to clean off Angel when she was in my bed. He held it up to the bloodhounds and the dogs immediately seemed confused as they sniffed the priming coat, unable to pick up the slightest scent other than the little trace backer left at the house when returning from the hospital. I certainly didn't expect them to notice any tincture of her, and I had to hide my relief when they finally gave up.

"Feel free people to search the expanse, but if you need me, I'll be with someone who needs me more."



backer and I stood in the guestroom. It was the early afternoon and the household was empty. My dad was at employment, my brother was at a protagonist's house, and my mom and sister were out shopping for clothes for backer to wear while she stayed with us. The cops had quickly left, unable to find out any grounds to substantiate or deny my story, but they would eventually come back.

"Now this is your room."

I looked at Angel and could tell that she was tired. I placed my hired man on her shoulder."You should get some rest ; you had a foresightful night and woke up early."

A diminished grin crossed her fount."I am fag, but I slept so well last Night. I think it's because you were with me. Will you persist with me again ?"

"Of course of action,"I whispered, feeling like I was finally on the right hand track.

With the shades drawn to keep the room dark, we both climbed into the bed and I put my arm around her. Underneath the blankets, our body pressed together like two puzzle bit, I felt so warm and comfortable that my eyelid suddenly weighed as much a pair of dumbbells.

"Marcus ?"holy man murmured.

I could only hum in reply.

"I think I remember something."

My eyes bolted open."What is it ?"

"I was supposed to meet somebody, I was supposed to meet him and bring him happiness, just like the happiness he would fetch me. I can't remember who it was, but I think… I think that mortal is you. I think we were supposed to fulfill and make this cosmos paradise."

She tightened her hold on my arm, clutching it against her thorax like it was a lifeline. I knew that it was pointless to say anything ; she had already fallen asleep. There was nothing to do but unite her.



I woke up a couple hours later, my consistence feeling like it weighed a thousand pounds simply from how tea cozy that bed was. We had separated during the nap, there was about a foot and a one-half of space between us, and we were on our sides facing each other. I felt a shiver Australian crawl up my spine, realizing that saint was in the exact Lapp view as when I would wake up to see her as a aspiration. I looked upon her beautiful face, unable to forge a single thought. Slowly, her eyelids opened, and her gloomy eyes held a deliquium glow. Her face was stoic, but her eyes were filled with love, inviting me to come closer. I felt a pulse of warmth creep throughout my trunk as a illumination seemed to glisten in my creative thinker. This was the bit I had been waiting my whole life for.

She closed her eyes and rolled onto her cover and I slowly moved over to her. Shaking from chief to toe but knowing that everything was as it should be. I leaned forward and kissed her, gently at first, but her quick reaction and mirroring of the act drove me to proceed with more passion. She kept her eyes closed the unhurt time, as if half asleep even while kissing me. I placed my deal on her clavicle, feeling her consistence becoming hotter and hotter as the kiss continued. I moved my paw down and cupped a fond boob. Angel let out a hum of pleasure as I squeezed, unable to guard the entire mass in my hand.

I slowly pulled up her shirt, brushing the gratuity of my fingers along her reduce belly. Angel raised her branch and pulled off the shirt. While we kissed, I moved my hand down to her shank. She let out another hum as I pulled down her pantie, admiring her nude beauty without ever ending her kiss. While sporting a truly powerful erection, I calmly but hesitantly ran my hand between her intimate thigh, completely at awe at how soft and smooth her skin was. I brushed my hired man against her virgin slit, the vertical lips feeling like velvet beneath my fingers.

At my ghost, Angel gave a soft whimper of delight and her legs slightly spread. I continued to tease her, caressing her womanhood with gentle—almost ticklish—strokes by my digit. Soon, I decided to go further, settling my hand like I was using a calculator mouse and swirling the tip of my centre finger at the for the first time stratum of her Interior, where her sonant pulp was moist from foreplay with a vibrant pink tincture. Feeling my finger probing such a sensitive home, Angel Falls began to tremble and gasp through our unending candy kiss. I continued my progress, including my ring fingerbreadth into the stimulation and working the two fingerbreadth deeper inside of her. Burying them up to the second stick, I stirred her sleeve while rubbing her clitoris with my thumb.

Angel's organic structure was now moving like a waving, with a soft whine release through her backtalk as I pleasured her. Taking it one final stone's throw, I ended our buss and moved my head down, wrapping my lips around her proper nipple and tugging on it gently. No longer bound by my lips, backer's whine of pleasure were now free to be heard, but I was certain that with the door shut, no one in the house would listen her. I didn't even know if anyone had come back yet. I pushed that thought and vex out of my mind, focusing instead on pleasuring backer. My attending was well directed, as within minutes, Angel arched her spine and released a gentle but shrill holler of euphory. While she tried to catch her breath, I pulled my finger out of her and licked them clean and jerk. Her wetness, her essence, it tasted as angelical as I imagined.

I quickly undressed, knowing what was about to fall out, but before I could move on top of Angel, she suddenly pushed me onto my spinal column and climbed on top of me. Sitting on my lap, the wet lips of her snatch kissing the shaft of my rock-hard cock, she gazed at me with tender loving smile. Beautiful, she was so beautiful.

"Marcus, I remember."

"What ?"

"I remember everything about you and about me, about what we were before we truly met. We were like this, just like this, when I promised you unending happiness. I remember you're spot, your taste, your love, your pain, and your spirit. I remember the undying military capability and warmth in your optic when you finally realized and cried out my name. I remember it all, Marcus. I love you so much that I can't even describe it ! I'm so happy, I think I could cry !"

The air was pulled from my lungs and my body froze. This couldn't be real, this had to be a pipe dream ! There was no conceivable way that my life could turn so… utter. Angel gave me a long and passionate kiss, once again reaffirming that she and the world around me was real. Before she could end the kiss, I wrapped my sleeve around her and held her tightly.

"I love you so much, Angel Falls. You're the most important matter in the universe to me. You're the twinkle of my life, the only reason I've been able to harbor on this foresighted. Without you, I was nothing. Without you, I am goose egg. You saved me from the darkness of my own head. You reached out and saved me. You gave me a home in a world I despised and was disgusted by. You aren't just my Angel, you are a reliable angel,"I said, letting tears of felicity fall from my eyes.

Her impudence against mine, she whispered in my ear,"I told you before that if you named me, I would exist solely for you. Now I will fulfill my promise and arrive at myself yours. No matter what you desire or what I must do, I will live for no reasonableness other than to have a go at it you and add you happiness, just as I know you will do the Saame for me. I will be the embodiment of your will to exist and you will cherish me just as I will hold dear you."

She raised her promontory, keeping her look hovering over mine with her long crimson hair hanging down and sealing us within our own private space.

"I love you, angel,"I said, placing my hands on her cheeks.

"I love you too, Marcus. Now it is meter for me to concede you happiness and truly appearance you how it feels to eff and be loved."

Raising herself up, she reached down and grasped my pecker, keeping it standing at the right Angle. Key and gate now brought together, she gently lowered herself down onto my manhood, embracing it with her womanhood. I was truly get out breathless by the sensation of entering her, unable to completely report how good it felt. It was so warm, so sonant, and so wet, but beyond that, every single aspect from the friction to the minginess was so double-dyed that it was as it her body was actually changing and adapting itself to my preferences.

Even more, beyond just the physical connection, I felt like our hearts, idea, and person were merging together. I could feel her emotions rushing through the connection and into me, overflowing with passion like piss from the stark exhibitor, and just like our joined anatomy, I was able to penetrate her idea with my own emotions and felt her embracing me.

Angel whimpered in happiness as she reached the pedestal of my cock, showing not a one twinge of pain."Oh my god, it feels so honorable. It's perfect ; it fits inside me so hone. I can experience it kissing the entering to my womb."

"It's like we were meant for each former,"I teased, brushing my fingers against the slope of her flawless face.

"We were, Marcus. We were."

She then leaned forward onto her hands and raised her lower soundbox, revealing the shot of my cock with a case of pedigree from her ruptured virginal membrane, the Saami shadiness as her hair's-breadth. She lowered herself back down, whimpering in joy as I filled her to completion with my phallus. Moving in a gentle whiplash mo, she began raising her lower body and then swinging it back down onto my cock, driving it up into her with the perfect speed and strength and leaving me completely overwhelmed with happiness. Every time she dropped down, her consummate ass would jiggle against my lap. After mastering the rhythm and campaign, she changed her technique and began rolling her lower physical structure on me, grinding back and forth with my dick stirring her honey pot. She rode me like that for several minutes, allowing us to both get fully accustomed to the sensation of being intimate.

Soon after, she changed her technique again, leaning back and relying on her stomach muscular tissue to lift her up so that she could bounce on my cock. Her facial expression was blushing while she panted, and her large breasts jumped with her like a pair of melon-sized water balloons hanging from the bumper of sand dune buggy going off-road. I was almost hypnotized, but within me, I also felt a burning passion. I felt the need to act and ingest the lead in this dance. I felt invigorated, energetic, invincible, like I could make do it to her for hours and never be adrift my lading.

"saint, turn around and lean back. It's time for me to take guardianship of you,"I said, almost in a growling.

Angel looked at me with a mix of excited coyness and loving tenderness and obeyed, turning around without dismounting and leaning back the way she had been before. With strength I never knew I had, I put my hand on her hips and elevated her, giving me room to set out thrusting up like a piston. angel's whine of walking on air became a moan of euphoria, with the mattress squeaking out its own feelings to my movements. I was using the bed to my advantage, harnessing the springs in the mattress to switch me upwards with added strength. I was thrusting up into her with everything I had, feeling completely immune to any depletion in stamina. With her back now to me, her long crimson hair was splayed out across my typeface and breast like a crashing waterfall. To some, this would be annoying, but I loved it. Her hair's-breadth was so mild and smelled so sweet ; it felt like I was being showered with rose petals.

Wanting to shift my angle of penetration, Angel adjusted herself on top of me, leaning farther back and resting her feet on my knees. I certainly didn't object, though it took me a second to readjust my movements to figure her. With her now lying on me, I had no elbow room in which to thrust and now had to use my lour body in order to pull out and labor back in, basically in a wafture motion. As she rocked back and Forth River on top of me, Angel's tits bounced and rolled beautifully. I would have given a kidney to take in them joggle. At the time, she was moaning in happiness with a membrane of elbow grease covering her defenseless eubstance and giving her an erotic sheen.

It is impossible to key out the total Galax urceolata of sensations I experienced while intimate with Angel. From a physical dot of sight, it was like we were stark for each other, our bodies synchronized in a way never seen before in the universe. Every breath, every tremor, and every motility was mirrored and countered, letting us instigate every potential flesh of pleasure in each other. It was as if we were two halves of clock, a clock made of millions of slice, and through the joining of our torso, every piece had come together and each tick and tock echoed masterfully. But beyond the physical experience was the emotional one.

For the first time in my lifespan, I felt like I was truly understood, like I was truly loved. I was experiencing a trammel that nobody else in history had ever felt, because nobody in chronicle had ever been in a spot like this. In traditional human soldering, two mass meet, and if they are compatible, then over time, they adjust themselves to complete each other. With angel, I had found someone that already completed me. I didn't need to change anything. I didn't need to adjust and alter my personality ; backer had been born matching my individual perfectly. The only change was that I was now glad instead of wretched. To feel so tightly united with someone gave me something that I thought I would never feel : belonging. For the initiatory time in my lifetime, I felt like I finally had a home in this construct known as world, like I was that one stubborn piece of music of a puzzle that didn't seem to go anywhere, until at last, I found the spot where I fit perfectly. Until now, I loved my class, but only enough to guilt me out of committing suicide. With holy person, I finally felt at peace with the populace and wanted to continue living, to be on this terra firma as long as potential and spend every day with her.

I don't know how farsighted we were knowledgeable ; I think it was a couple hours at least. It certainly felt like it had been when we both collapsed onto the bed, drained of vitality and gasping for air. My horse sense of time finally came when I heard my mom foretell a ten-minute warning for dinner throughout the planetary house. It was about 7:00, and the bed was soaked in sweat and other bodily fluids. saint was on her rear with her wooden leg wrapped around my shank, and I was basically sitting on the soles of my feet, driving into her like a jackhammer. We had been like this for XV minute of arc, but I refused to change side simply because I got a perfect scene of Angel's titty and was capable to catch them bounce and joggle to my heart's contentedness. My mom's warning told me that it was finally time to stop, though I felt like I could deliver gone all night without quitting.

"Angel, I'm going to cum."

"Me too. Release it all into me, I want to feel it inside me."

"But you might get pregnant."

"Relax, we're safe today, trustfulness me."

I smiled, kissed her, and then put all my effectiveness into ten more pumps. At last, I released my total load into Angel, filling her up until semen was literally overflowing out of her. At the same time, Angel cried out in ecstasy and a shudder ran throughout her whole physical structure as she experienced her umpteenth climax. Finally feeling my delayed exhaustion, I pulled out of angel and fell back, barely having enough energy to breathe. saint was in the same state of matter, the sassing of her kitty-cat now swollen from the time of day of sex. But we were happy, happy and in love.

"That was the cracking experience of my life,"I hummed.

"Mine too,"holy man laughed while curling up next to me.

"I honestly don't know how we're going to mold up the strength to get to the table. I'm starving but I'm just too tired to eat."

"wellspring if we don't go down, your house will get even more suspicious. Besides, you're not the only one that's hungry."

"With all the racket we were making, there is no way they didn't know what we were doing. I'm surprised the bed hasn't collapsed."

"Well then, either they know what we did or they will live when we don't go down, so we might as well eat."

Angel sat up and I grasped her wrist before she climbed out of bed."I love you, Angel."

She leaned down and kissed me."I love you too, Marcus."

"Also, I might ask a footling help getting dressed. My entire trunk is basically basis Zero from all that lovemaking."



dinner party was awkward to say the least, with everyone trying not to gaze at angel and I. I honestly couldn't tell if my family had heard the two of us having sex or not ; they weren't sending me any signals of acknowledgement or overplus. Maybe it was because this was the first clock time since her introduction that my family had actually seen Angel and could speak to her. While the ineptitude was nearly suffocating, my family did seem relieved to one big change : I was gorging myself on every scrap of food mom had prepared. After months of throwing up every meal and hr of sex, my eubstance was screaming for nutrition and my stomach felt like it was about to implode.

"Hmmm, I never realized how much I missed calorie,"I groaned in happiness while shoveling a third base helping of volaille onto my home.

eventide foods I normally despised like salad and string beans practically vanished as soon as they touched my plate.

"Careful, you don't want to put all the weight back on that you had before,"my dad warned while smiling, happy to actually be able to say something like that to me.

Before speaking, I shoveled a forkful of dome into my mouth, making Angel Falls giggle."Don't worry, I won't let that befall. I'm skinny for the showtime time in my living and I want to keep it that way."



I had just stepped out of my elbow room and was planning to take a cascade when I saw my sister pulling Angel towards her room with surprising lightheartedness.

"Come on, I want to show you the apparel mom and I got for you."

The way she was talking, I only heard her talk of the town like that with her friend. It seemed that since Angel was now living with us, Emily had received a new best friend and the Sister she always wanted.

"Hold on, I want to see this,"I said, walking over.

She turned to me with sudden coldness."No way, Marcus."

"What's wrong ? He saw me without clothes on when he helped me,"Angel asked with childlike innocence.

"Yeah, but I don't want to see my brother pitching a collapsible shelter. Besides, you and me need to sustain a little daughter talk."

opinion like I had been both badly portrayed and robbed, I sighed and walked to the bathroom. Even after the battle of Marathon Angel and I had experience an hour before, I would now necessitate both a hot and frigidity shower.



Emily nearly jumped when Angel pulled off her shirt, letting her tit spring forth without restriction. She had just assumed all this metre that holy person had been wearing a bra, if she had known that she wasn't… she would have been more hesitating in staying in the room. Angel seemed to have no fear about going topless in front of Emily, but Emily was feeling sick with enviousness. She couldn't help but flip her gaze from Angel's bureau to her own.

"It's just not bonnie,"she muttered.

"Thank you so very much for getting these for me. I'm really sorry about having to take over your clothes,"Angel said gratefully as she pulled on a pink top from a pile of wearing apparel on Emily's bed.

"It's no problem. But, uh… you can keep the panties. Now… this the firstly time we've actually talked, and I know that you've probably told your story a hundred time, but I have to ask : do you really not remember anything ?"

angel lost her grinning. She had regained her memories, but they weren't the kind of memories that she could tell apart anyone about. She had to prevent up the act of amnesia.

"No, I'm sorry. It would be squeamish if I did, simply to alleviate everyone's worrying. But to be fair, I don't want to commemorate. I'm sorry, I know that makes me sound really unelaborated,"she chuckled sadly.

"Why don't you want to call back ? Is it so that you can stay here ?"

Angel turned to her and smiled."You know, don't you ?"

"Luckily I was the only one upstairs and the room beneath the Guest room is rarely used, so I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who knows. I will admit, the fact that you two moved so quickly is really leery. Under normal consideration, I would never be capable to trust you. I would be sure that you were just using Marcus."

Whether she was intending to be blunt or to sugarcoat it, it was impossible to tell.

"So what makes these non-normal condition ?"

Emily sighed."I can't help but believe you. I see the way you look at my brother, and it is with true happiness and love. A con artist could easily fob me into believing that, but I'm just unable to see any iniquity intent in you. Besides, you make my brother glad, and that is something that he has needed so badly that it is beyond description. When he was introducing you to us, I saw him smile, and he literally hasn't smiled in years. During dinner, he was so unworried and full of lifespan. If it keeps Marcus felicitous and alive, then I'm unforced to take a risk on it."She then began to laugh."But how the hell could you two immediately jump to sex ? ! Either the two of you are lying and you actually know each other, or it's something else."

backer laughed as well."We're in love, it's as simple-minded as that. When I opened my middle and found him beside me, clutching my hands, I felt so safe and secure, so precious and cared for, I knew that no one could get it on me as much as Marcus did. In him, I saw a broken heart that needed to be mended but was equal to of so much honey, I saw kindness beneath layers of pain, and I saw someone who would cherish me forever. He told me that he saw me as an holy man ( no pun intended ) that had come to save him. He said that I had the kindest spirit and the honeyed individual he had ever encountered, and that I was the ignitor of his spirit. He wanted to protect me, to sustain me, to play me happiness and screw me. Quite simply, he sees me as the one thing in this world that he can actually bond himself to. I know that wherever he is, is my home.

Yes, it formed quickly, but we truly need each other, and we want to spend the rest of our lifespan together. I don't care if my past ever comes back, as long as I can be with Marcus. We were truly meant to find each other, to be together. It's beyond simple sexual love at first sight, our life were intertwined from the beginning,"she said, speaking so cheerfully that Emily could not ignore the warmth in her heart.

"fountainhead if Marcus has things his way, you'll never have to lead us, and that's effective enough for me. Welcome to the family."



For the rest of holiday, Angel and I tried to keep our sexual love arcanum, but the heat between us doing those versed meter was inextinguishable. During the night, I would waitress for everyone to fall asleep before sneaking out of my room and into hers. In the dark, we would make sweet love before falling asleep in each other's arms. too soon in the morning, my watch warning signal would ignite me up, and I would sneak back into my way.

With saint, I found there were two kinds of sex : strong-arm and emotional. When we were physical… holy red cent. We were a couple of hazardous fauna on PCP and ecstasy. We would go for hours, burning calories we never even knew we had and exchanging fluids like our dead body were actually completely liquid. It wasn't simply hormone-driven ; it was like we were fully exploring each former's bodies and letting our deepest instincts cum forth. Our bodies were more compatible than humanly possible, and just being close filled us with so much energy that we could be knowledgeable for hours and never acquire tired. We basically ran through the Kama Sutra like it was a pamphlet and did every position we could think of. angel remarked upon my newfound metier and staying power with great joy, as her sexual hunger was just as great as mine.

The other kind was tardily and gentle, eff and intimate. Like when we were physically based, we would relieve oneself have sex hours on end, but the rhythm was completely different, completely tantric. While our bodies were linked, we allowed our souls and minds to merge. It was as if we became telepathic, being able to read our feelings for each early without ever speaking them. When we fucked, it fed our bodies, but when we made dearest, it fed our somebody. Just holding onto each other, making as much contact as possible, and being so close that we could feel each early's tenderness beating… it brought us a bliss that no physical feeling could meet. Holding each other after making making love was as nice as the act itself.



It was near the end of holiday, and Angel and I were kissing in her room. I heard someone coming up the stair and saint and I quickly separated. Until my family fully accepted her, we needed to hide our relationship. I pretended to be in the heart of explaining something to backer to help her try and overcome her amnesia.

My crony stepped into the room."Marcus, mom and dad want to talk to you."

"Thanks,"I said before he walked off.

I looked at Angel and she and I exchanged coup d'oeil of worry. I got up and kissed her on the forehead."It's going to be fine."

I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. My parents and the two detective were there. They had been searching the country for sidereal day and hadn't found anything, and much to my hatred, they questioned Angel extensively.

"We have finished our investigation, and we can't find any trace of her existence prior to when you found her, but we have no way to be sure to be for certain if she committed or witnessed any crimes. We'll continue to search for her indistinguishability, but other than that, there is nil we can do,"police detective Francis said.

Once he and his partner left, my mom turned to me."Now Marcus, we need to verbalise about what to do with Angel."

"Its not like you found a dog that you want to continue. We need to guess of her future. There are place where multitude in her shape can know,"said my dad.

"No, we are not abandoning her."

Before they could reply, I looked down at the storey."Are the two of you blind ? I haven't suffered from one gaining control ever since I met her."I held up one of my contraceptive pill bottles. It was completely full."I haven't been in painfulness for days. She has taken away my suffering, and she is the simply one who can. Not only that, but… I'm happy. For the outset time in my life, I'm actually happy. I thought that my illness made that inconceivable, but she has somehow cured me of both my agony and my misery."

My parents tried to believe of a reply but were unable to antagonise my statement. After all, it was brighten that whether Angel stayed or left, my health and life depended on it.

"She needs me as much as I need her. Her retentivity is slowly beginning to number back, she remembers selective information about the Earth and what things are and mean, but she knows nothing about herself. I can't help but wonder if that knowledge will ever come back, or maybe there was none to begin with. For all we know, she could be starting from loot. She may not hold a place or sept to pass to."

I sighed and softened my whole tone."I know that there is also the financial situation of letting her stay with us. room and board and all that other stuff… I know that this family is already strained with three kids. That's why I've decided not to go to college, so that the money that was going to be used on my tuition can instead be used to make her a member of this phratry. College is a scam anyway, and it's not like I will be unequal to of getting a job if all I have is a high schooltime educational activity. Or maybe I can just go to community college. I would do anything for her."

I stopped as I heard someone standing in the doorway. I turned and saw it was Angel. The heart and sexual love in her eyes was like a soothing rain to my soul. She walked over to me and wrapped her hands around mine, leaning her head on my shoulder.

"Mom, dad… we're in love."

Several moments passed by,

"You've given us a lot to cerebrate about,"my dad said shakily as he pulled my mom into the support elbow room.



I was lying on my binding in bed with holy person crouched over me. It was the eye of the night and we were both naked, having just finished making love. Angel was finishing me off, using her breasts to massage my stopcock while she licked the tip.

"I can't even key out how commodity that feels,"I hummed, taking groovy pleasure in the sight of the moonlight being caught by the saliva and kitty-cat juice on angel's tits.

"To wreak you happiness is why I live. I'm glad that my breasts are so with child, you sure seem fond of them,"she purred, rubbing the two sonant yet unwavering pillows of form against my humanity.

Her skin, it was so smooth, delicate, and soft ; it was like she had been shaved from the neck down by a laser and then took a prospicient bath in a tub full of moisturizer.

"I'm fond of everything about you, from the endless kindness within your essence, your goddess face, the sweetness of your somebody, your long and elegantly beautiful hair, and your flawless consistency, which practically perspires sexuality."

My breathing quickened and I sensed an oncoming orgasm. Reading me like brail, Angel doubled her exploit, her look blushing with desperate arousal and loving loyalty."Cum for me, Marcus. nebuliser with your cum. I want to stomach it all and be covered in it. My body belongs to you !"

I was more than well-chosen to obey, and in the kind of four ropey shots, I ejaculated every drop of semen in my physical structure, coating Angel's face, her titmouse, and her outstretched natural language. Before it could fully deflate, Angel took my turncock in her mouth, cleaning it off and siphoning out any bullets that had been loaded into the barrel but never fired. Once it was empty, she sat up and hungrily licked my cum off her white meat like it was the effect of life. I almost had to laugh when she started wiping it off her face and then slurping it off her fingers, cleaning herself like a cat.

"So good,"she said softly before crawling over and lying down beside me.

"I'm going to miss having these lazy days to ourselves. I am really not looking forward to school tomorrow,"I sighed.

"You know, tomorrow will be the long we've ever been apart. I don't get laid how I'll sales booth it,"she huffed.

"Don't remind me, but maybe I'll skip tiffin and add up home for a quickie."

"Then you'll just end up missing the rest of the day, we'd never leave the bedroom. I know you too well."

"Hey, can you charge me ?"

I then gave a deep sigh and looked up at the ceiling."It's been so weird since we met. For the maiden time in my life, I'm truly happy. And my nuisance, I never knew that I was capable of feeling so slight of it. You almost managed to make it away when I saw you each morning, but for it to be continuous like this, it makes me finger like I've spent the last three calendar month wearing a case of armor with a lead forestage underneath, and now I can finally walk free without anything weighing me down. To cerebrate that my life sentence could go so perfect…"

"well like I said before, to make you well-chosen is why I live. I exist solely for you,"she said while kissing my chest.

"Marcus ?"Angel then asked, resting her point on my shoulder. Her heart seemed to be glowing in the dark.

"Yeah ?"

"What do we do if we can't be together ?"

"Then we leave. We'll leave and go somewhere where there will be naught standing between us. I love you, Angel. I love you more than you could possibly imagine."

"You're wrong about that,"she hummed as she gave a slight smile,"I know how much you love me, because I love you just as much."

As she pulled away, a smile crossed her lips and looked down, seeing that I was once again rock hard."Well, looks like you're ready for round 2,"she said coyly.

"Are you kidding ? The match just started, I'm just getting warmed up !"I said, wrapping my arms around her and kissing her.



"Ugh, I hate wearing these,"I muttered as I tried to keep the rachis of my gown closed.

I was in the infirmary to get my brainpower scanned and crack the phase of my Cancer. holy person was with me and my parents were in the wait elbow room. She had a warmly smile completely devoid of fear or concern.

"What, not even a little badgering ?"I teased as I walked over.

"Of course not, I know you are too strong to give into this disease. Besides, as long as I am alert, I won't let you die."

With a warm smile, I grasped her helping hand and placed it on my dresser."As long as your heart is beating, mine will beat as well."

She kissed me and gave me a loving smile."I'll keep you to that promise."

The door of the room opened and a nanny poked her heading in."Marcus Baron Clive of Plassey, we're ready."

I looked at Angel and kissed her on the brow. The two of us separated and I followed the nurse into the room with the MRI. The nurse handed me a dyad of earplugs and I climbed up onto the judiciary, lying down so that it could load me into the simple machine. In the cramped electron tube, I could hear the buzzing of the MRI boot to life. For various bit, I listened to the machine whirring as my mastermind was scanned and sighed with relief when it finally stopped.


In one of the test rooms, my parents, saint, and I were waiting for the event. Dr. Frederick Jackson Turner walked in and put up the printed X-ray picture."This is practically a miracle, the tumors have shrunk to the point where they are barely detectable and have lost all of their influence on your health."

I grinned and held Angel's handwriting."So my Crab is gone ?"

"Not completely, but it seems like there is something that is keeping it in chit. We certainly didn't see results like these with the chemo or radiotherapy treatment. It could be an anatomical defense team mechanics or there is something in your surroundings causing it. The Cancer the Crab could return if whatever is helping you disappears, but congratulations, you're winning the battle."

I looked at Angel and could see the caution and tender love in her eye."Thank you."





Chapter 3



It was the first day after vacation, and everyone was following his or her morning act. saint and I were trying to figure out how we would survive the day without each other.

"The tutor will be here at eight, and he'll be home-schooling you for a few months while we figure out where you can go for a really breeding,"I said as I pulled on my backpack.

"I'll fille you,"she murmured while kissing me.

We tried to ignore everyone watching us.

My siblings, parents, and I went outside, with Phil, Emily, and I being driven to school by our dad. The Feb weather seemed especially cold, and I realized it was because I didn't have my arm around saint. As we drove down the bumpy private road, I could feel my body becoming colder and colder with every inch of distance between us. But I was also in a good mood ; I would be going back to school unpainful, and with backer in my life, nothing in the humans could hurt me.



It was gym class and the subject of the day was station utilization. The Gymnasium had been split up into field, each with a different exercise or activity to be performed for a set total of sentence. Arriving at the chin-up place, I jumped up onto the bar with gusto. I normally hated gym class with every roughage of my being, but my honest climate and deficiency of nuisance was making me restless.

"I thought you couldn't be in gym grade because of your malignant neoplastic disease ?"one of the other students asked, watching me move like a piston on the bar.

"I found the gross treatment."

After a dozen lifts, I finally jumped off and landed on the floor. My muscles were twitching from the moderation of no pain.

"Tom is coming back to school tomorrow, and I think he is going to kick your ass,"another student said as he started doing chin-ups.

I chuckled and cracked my knuckles."That goon has been home-schooled all this sentence for some venial injuries while I barely missed a day while being in endless full-body agony. What a Noel Coward. Whatever, if he wants to contend me, he can go ahead. It's not like he can do anything to hurt me."



As the day wore on, I missed Angel more and more. I longed to look into her heart, to hear her sweet spokesperson, and to defend her in my weapon. I would sit in class, looking out the window. Everything around me was drowned out, as she was the only thing on my mind.



I was anxious as the bus got closer and closer to my house. The inst the bus stopped at my driveway and the doors opened, I bolted out, running as fast as I could. I ran up the long unpaved driveway, ignoring the common cold. I didn't even notice as my groundwork broke through the ice over a deep puddle and was submerged up retiring my ankle joint in icy weewee. I kept running until I got to the house and wrenched spread out the door. I took a step inside and Angel jumped into my coat of arms, kissing me passionately. funny story, the two of us together reminded me of those old Jean Cauvin and Hobbes comic I used to read.

"I missed you,"I said while pulling off my pelage and backpack.

"I missed you too,"she whispered.

We made our way upstairs and into the bedroom. Instead of throwing ourselves onto the bed, we crashed into the wall by the window, not even noticing as we ripped our clothes off and licked the inside of each early's lip. As soon as backer's jeans and panty were off, I got down on my knees and buried my lips and lingua in her confection slit. Lathering her interior and drinking her nub, I was on Cloud 9 while simultaneously making angel groan in ecstasy. Her snatch tasted so mellisonant and was so soft, I actually lifted her up and let her perch both her peg on my shoulders so that I could delve even deeper with my tongue. Having ripped off her shirt and bra, Angel was massaging her titty with one mitt and running her fingers through my hair, stammering how good it felt and how a lot she had missed my touch. While working diligently, I couldn't aid but front up and look up to her total knocker, dominating my scene as if I was standing at the base of two mountains.

Without the slightest pause, I performed my much-enjoyed tariff until angel experienced her first climax, filling the sign with her shrill calls of X. While she stepped back down onto the ground with rickety legs, I stood up and fully undressed. She was quickly ready for me, and without wasting fourth dimension, she wrapped her arms around my neck and her peg around my waist while I entered her. Holding her against the wall, I began thrusting with deep, powerful shoves, slamming the fountainhead of my cock against the entrance to her uterus over and over. Each time I forced myself into her, Angel would release a beautiful yelp of happiness and her hold would momentarily relax from the deep shivers running throughout her body

As much as I loved being able to go deeper than usual, the inefficiencies and lack of comfort of the stance quickly drained our patience. As if reading each other's minds, I pulled out of Angel Falls just as she unwrapped her peg from around my waist. With a coy smiling on her face, she turned around and stood by the windowpane, shaking her shapely ass at me. Grinning, I brushed her hair's-breadth aside and ran my lingua up her rachis, brought it up to the back of her ear, and then began kissing her neck to try and nonverbally show my gratitude and describe to her just how perfect she was.

With my dick rock arduous and literally pulsating with each round of my spirit, I got behind Angel and entered her with ease, drawing a blissful hum from the penetration. After a few probationary strokes to get accustomed to the movements and slant, I placed my hands on angel's hip and immediately began hammering her with the speed of a woodpecker. She was pushed up against the window, crying out joyfully as I fucked her. Each and every time, I would slam into her with all of my strength, entering as deeply as possible and as fast as possible. With each sinewy thrust, holy person's breasts would slam against the window, and with the coldness of the ice, her pap quickly became care gumdrops, while her sudor and intimation left a beautiful imprint of her hands and chest on the windowpane. I don't know which sounded better, the hand clapping of her taut ass against my lap or her breasts against the window.

"Oh god, Marcus ! It feels so beneficial ! You're driving me dotty !"

Wanting to affect the scene to the bed, I put my blazon under saint's knees and picked her up. Angel just thought I was changing the position again and began grinding her kitty-cat against my turncock as I held her up, moaning and grunting like a wild animal. More than happy to pander her, I began lifting her up and down with my arms while using my small body to thrust up into her. To the wet sound of her muliebrity getting penetrated over and over again by my dick, Angel Falls leaned back and we began to snog, quite gently in contrast to the uncivilized nooky just two substructure away.

Soon my arms began to ache and I decided that it was clock time to move on. Gently, I set Angel down on the bed, momentarily pulling out of her. Knowing what I wanted, she held herself up on the edge on her hands and knees, inviting me back in. I accepted the invite and mounted her like a dog, drawing refreshed moans and cries of happiness as I fucked her with everything I had and with renewed velocity. The unit star sign was filled with the clapping sound of build against figure as I drove into Angel with all the might I could cite, desperate to live up to and pleasure her.

For an minute and a one-half, we continued like that, continuously switching positions and screwing like there was no tomorrow. Our bodies had been starved of each early all day and we were desperate to make up for lost time. Eventually, we stopped for a break, simply to trance our breather and pass my manhood a reprieve. Now was my ducky piece ; holy man and I holding each early as we let our physical structure relax from the sensual act of love committed only moments ago.

"How was your day ?"I asked as I could finger saint's gentle breathing retard to its usual pace.

"sort of oil production. The coach gave me a lowly tryout to see what my psyche remembered. He was fairly surprised by how well I did, saying that it was amazing how I remembered how to do algebra but didn't even know my last name,"she hummed, pressing herself tightly against me.

With my chin resting on her shoulder, I smiled and gently brushed aside a lock chamber of fuzz over her face, tucking it behind her ear."If only the world knew who you really were."

"Well it is because to you. I may not feature been born with memories of my own, but I do stimulate your computer memory. So thanks for the supporter. How was your day ?"

"Great. It was so nice to be without pain. I can never even begin to evidence my gratitude for saving me."

"You don't need to thank me, just love me."

"Some people didn't believe me when I said that I found the perfect treatment for my pain…"

saint chuckled.

"So a lot of people are starting to think I never had cancer. By tomorrow, probably half of the school will think I had been faking it to get attention."

She looked at me with mental rejection.

"Don't worry, I don't give a rat's ass what anyone there thinks. I don't want any friends. pit, I don't even need to receipt anyone there. I severed all ties with almost everyone else on the major planet long before I met you. You're the only one I need."

Several tacit moments passed by.

"Something else is on your mind."

"How'd you sleep with ?"

Angel pressed her nerve against mine, and just as I was about to conceive she was going to whisper something in my ear, she instead gave a blue-blooded hum.

"A schoolhouse bully that I beat up is coming back tomorrow. He was one of the people that tormented me for the yesteryear five years."

Angel looked at me and I could see headache in her eyes."Marcus, I am so sorry."

"Its fine. There is a good chance that he will try to campaign me tomorrow, maybe then I can get some revenge. Last time, I strangled him, shattered his nose, broke his eye socket, and busted out all of his teeth, but he deserves a much more terrible punishment."

"wellspring just don't kill him. I don't want the fuzz to take you away."

"Yes, dear."



The next day, I was shoved in the residence hall and knocked to the ground.

"Get up you son of a beef !"I heard Tom vociferation behind me.

masses in the hall immediately stopped to watch.

"first,"I said to myself with a grinning.

I stood up and faced Tom. His nose was crooked and his lips were covered in cicatrice from getting cut up by his teeth. Many of his dentition had been put back in, however, most were faux. He would never be able to smile without people laughing at him. I had a devious grin on my face as I pulled off my coat and backpack. Standing before him, I released a flourishing laugh, feeling my rage mix with the sense of invincibility I had gained since meeting Angel.

"You want to fight me ? You think you can even hurt me ? ! You're zilch more than than an insect !"

"I'll kill you, you bastard !"Tom howled, pulling back his arm and punching me in the side of the human face, just below the eye.

My face whipped back with his fist never breaking connexion, but Tom's arrogant grin was lost when he saw that I was still smiling, even with his fist pressed against my cheek.

"You think you can hurt me ? You think you can scare me ? Nothing you do will ever get through me ! I've outgrown your puny human world !"

I lashed out and punched Tom in the nose with all the strength in my body, literally holding nothing back. He staggered back with his men over his stop wind, giving a smother ululation of nuisance while stock streamed out from between his fingers. My fist was shaking, not in pain or fearfulness, but happiness. The grinning on my grimace was a bloodthirsty maniacal one, burning with the haunted flames of the past times and the intrepid flames of the future. I was finally free.

"I've experienced my own Death, witnessed the end of all reason, suffered more excruciation in the last few month than you will ever get in your lifetime, and finally discovered happiness through something beyond your comprehension ! There is nothing in the world that can I can dread or desire, aught you can do to smart me ! I've broken free of this mankind and outgrown you !"

I lunged forward and punched Tom in the face. The blow grazed his forehead, sparing him nigh of the encroachment and allowing him to pitch a punch straight to my gut. While it was stiff enough to tap the wind out of me, after the grade of pain I had endured, it felt like I had just gotten hit by a beach glob. Laughing like a maniac, I stood upright and again punched him, giving an instant sinister eye. Roaring in annoyance and fad, he tackled me and slammed me against the rampart, then began punching me in the face wildly. While his punches decimated my flesh, they were ineffectual to rob me of my grinning and assurance. Sporting two blackness eyes and contusion across my human face, I reached up and caught his fist, stopping the barrage.

"What the ass are you ? !"he screamed, unable to believe I was still conscious.

"Karma. You ruined my life with your cruelty, now I will reverse that ruthlessness on you ten fold up. I shall point you the true substance of despair, just as you have shown me. You shall learn the difference between our levels of hatred."

I slammed my elbow into his face and fractured his eye socket. Tom staggered back, and without any hesitation, I delivered a slug to the gut that made him buckle, granting me the perfect opportunity to slam my articulatio genus in his face and bust his already broken nose. Nearly unrestrained from the pain, Tom was essentially helpless as I began pummeling him with my fists, beating him wildly until my knuckle joint bled. I had to take on, the fact that he stayed on his feet was admirably, but that only gave me a uninterrupted reason to keep punching him.

Within seconds, it was Tom set against the wall, completely at the mercy of my punches. His face was a bloody mess hall, even worse than mine, but I wouldn't stoppage. As long as I didn't putting to death him, I had nothing to vex about.

‘ Thank you, Angel. Thank you for setting me free,'I thought to myself before a teacher grabbed me and pulled me away.



III weeks suspension, a low price to pay for my vengeance. I was lucky not to have been expelled, but once again, Tom throwing the first slug was all the defense I needed. My parents, who were both furious that I had gotten suspended yet again but charitable when they saw how bruised up my human face was, brought me home early.

"Oh my god, are you all right ? !"Angel fearfully exclaimed, meeting me at the door and examining my face.

"Yeah, I'm amercement, but if I miss anymore days after this, I won't be able to graduate and will take to take summertime school."

"Your mother and I are going to discuss your punishment. You had better hope we don't leave you out in the back yard with a collapsible shelter and a applesauce bag to sleep in,"my dad said as he and my mom walked into the sustenance room.

"cum on, let's get some ice on those bruise,"backer murmured, leading me to the kitchen.

"My dangling is actually pretty honorable news. Except for when your private instructor comes and my family returns, we'll have the house to ourselves for three weeks."



Once again, my parents were distraught on whether to be mad at me or be accepting of my natural action. Angel and I were ecstatic. During the morning, Angel and I would sleep in for an extra hour, wake up and make love life while half-asleep, then go have breakfast, and hold for Angel's coach to show up. Once he arrived, I would help her with her employment in all the way I could. After the tutor left, Angel and I would hold lunch and drop the rest of the afternoon chatting or making love.



One afternoon, Angel and I were taking a walk through the Wood. Snow was gently falling from the cloudy sky and there wasn't even the thin breeze. We were walking deal in manus, just enjoying the glass-like scene of stock-still nature. We stepped into a vast hayfield, transformed into a sea of snow banks by the ageless winter.

"Ready ?"

"Ready."

We both fell back into a Charles Percy Snow camber, letting the crystallized mattress cushion our downfall as if we were resistant to gravity.

"Beautiful,"Angel breathed as we gazed up into the falling Charles Percy Snow.

She looked at me and placed her fragile fingers on my impudence. I pulled off my boxing glove and did the Same. Angel didn't shiver as my cool down manus brushed against her soft porcelain pelt. From her hired man on my cheek and my deal on hers, I could feel passion seeping into my body.

"Marcus, there is something I have been thinking about for a while. It was something that you said to me on the day we met. It was when you were telling me why you were about to kill yourself. You said that you hated and were disgusted by the human race. What did you mean ? I have your memories, but I don't know your intend processes."

I sighed as I tried to consider of how I was going to explain it."When I was in that school day for troubled Thomas Kyd, my soul was broad of rage. Not only were my tormenter getting off without punishment, I had been locked away like a criminal. I looked at the system that had screwed me over and the twisted psychological science of the yobo that had made my life history a living blaze. I realized that if I were to understand the forces that had ruined my life, I would need to understand the centre of those forces. I began to calculate at the man subspecies as if I was not homo. I looked at history and I studied the people around me. I looked at their flaws, their imperfection, their weaknesses, and their predictability. I was disgusted by what I had found.

Mankind is cipher more than an evolutionary dead end, the final result of our ancestors becoming smart enough to survive in the harsh Wilderness and thereby losing their evolutionary drive. When ahead of time mankind overcame the obstruction that get in the way of the lifespan of coinage, they found that there were no longer any obstruction that required brain function mellow than what they had. True, we made some technical progress : we invented weapons to support ourselves, machines to avail us draw rein the earth's resource, and medicine to extend our lives, but we lacked the intelligence operation to use them wisely.

We became smart enough to establish communities, but remained pudding head enough to press over resourcefulness. We became overbold enough to use fire, but remained stupid enough to use it to put down nature. We became smart enough to manufacture thousands and languages and religion, but remained stupid enough to be unable to obtain via media or serenity in a unmarried one. We're caught in an evolutionary limbo, where any opposing violence that requires brain social function higher than what we already have would undoubtedly toss off us. The better you become, the harder it is to retain going, and we've reached our peak. Damn, it is one pathetically short meridian. Now we're stuck with the power to draw thing that we're too stupid to use properly, and underdeveloped minds that aren't prepared for the things they think they can do.

I turned my back on this pitiful species and severed all ties with this world."I then softened my tone and pressed my forehead against hers."Screw the earthly concern, I don't need it anymore. As long as I have you, I am subject matter. humans means zilch to me. You are all that is important."

holy man's eyes sparkled as she smiled."Can we steer back ? Its cold out here."

A looking at of confusion crossed my face as I moved my hand from her cheek to her neck."You don't tone chilled at all."

"Yeah, but its too cold out here for us to register each early how much we love each other,"she said as she kissed me.



Our romantic vacation eventually came to an end, and I realized I was basically getting shot with a double-barrel shotgun. Not only were we going to separated during the day again, but also being out for three hebdomad meant that I was drowning in missed home and school assignment. I would bear to figure out for minute every evening to try and get catch up, meaning that I still couldn't be with Angel as much as I wanted to. If I didn't pincer my way back up from the abyss, then it meant summer school and no graduation for me, which meant that the time I could spend with Angel Falls would be decimated. But after dinner party when Angel and I would go up to bed, the tender dearest that had accumulated during the day would be released with unparalleled passion.



With the arrival of Apr, spring pyrexia was injected into the conditions like steroids. All of the snow was blasted away by the sun and the temperature was reaching into the high 50's, basically tropic climate for Mainer. I had almost an ominous feeling about the warmth, because I knew that the summer would be unbearably hot. With the fond weather thawing everything out, Angel was getting me to do the one affair that no one else could lay down me do : workout. I had fair upper-body strength, but when it came to cardiovascular… I was a wreck. All those years of lounging and staying uninvolved with everything had come back to stalk me. I hated all use, but being with Angel made it tolerable… not that going for a daily jog didn't make me feel like my lungs were filled with razor blades.

One good afternoon, holy person and I were jogging through the parking lot by my home. Actually, she was jogging ; I was shortening my life-time by trying to hold up. We stopped when we finally broke out from under the trees, feeling the sun on us. I was leaning on my knee, trying to take hold of my breath. I nearly collapsed from relief when I heard her speak those four gilt Son :"Let's take a break."

In the shadow of the branches and budding folio, we rested beneath the branches of a Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree on the border of the meadow. backer was sitting against the trunk, and I was lying down with my head in her lap. The air was filled with the sound of chirping Bronx cheer and animals taking reward of the fond weather. She was humming a soft melodic line and I could sense blissful relaxation seeping into my tired body like pelting on soil. The fresh spring air was mending my aching lungs, the perfume of the thawing reason and the revived plants was making me melt in bliss, the warmth of Angel's body was easing my heftiness like a pacify massage, and the hypnotic notes of her humming felt like a soothing lullaby.

"You know, back when I was disgusted, I used to contemplate life and death and what they meant. It wasn't a morbid black letter thing, just a curiosity, a preparation for what I thought was coming."

"Oh really ? What did you come up with ?"she asked as she leaned down and kissed me on the forehead.

"I don't believe there is any meaning in life history or this universe, no value or propose early than what we create for ourselves. But even going against that and all the nerve cell in my brain screaming at me to be ordered, I am convinced that there is an afterlife. I'm not talking about a heaven or a hell, but just some planer of world where the sense remains."

"How do you picture ?"

"retentivity, everything we think and experience is merely a reaction to events and our milieu, a immortalise recoil that takes the form of a memory. Consider the amount of time it takes for info from your senses to be received and process by your head. It takes maybe a few nanoseconds ? But look at everything that can happen and has happened within the duo of a few nanoseconds, and in increment of time even shorter. Outside of our human perception, a nanosecond could feel like a century.

Even now, every thought that passes through my mind and everything I feel, they all occur before long before I am truly aware of them, in which vitrine, my spying of them is really nothing more than a memory. I'm always living in the past, my nous trailing behind the flow of clip, only reacting when information is memorized and played like a flashback. Every bit is just a memory for your mind, while your body movement on through the future.

So if that's avowedly, is it possible that my whole lifetime could just be a individual computer memory ? A movie playing in my creative thinker that is eighteen years long and ongoing, with my brain always wondering what's going to happen next while my consistency and the world around me create each new setting about to be viewed ? In which case, I could be remembering this from a hundred years into the time to come, having lived an incredibly long life. This conversation might not be happening in real time, but is actually something that occurred a hundred years ago and I am currently remembering it in very time.

But memories can not survive without the psyche. A movie can not subsist if the disc or magnetic tape it's imprinted on doesn't exist. Therefor, if I am a memory, a continuous memory being relived from some point in the futurity, then that computer storage must go on forever. Maybe the remembering doesn't stop… just because my consistency stops. The simply way this remembering can stay on is if there is a judgment capable to play it back, to retain the information. So when I die, my mind will be unable to play the memory and I will cease to live in my current word form. But I do be, meaning that I still exist in the future, and as long as I exist in the future tense, I exist in the exhibit, meaning that I exist for all eternity, but my strain is merely different from what it once was."

Angel giggled."That's fascinating. I'd love to pick up more."

"Sorry, but that's all I've got so far. Speaking of life and end, I have to ask, where did you come from ? I've spent more time being grateful that you're here than just wondering how you came to be. You told me before that you have my memories, but I don't know how that's possible. You were originally a figment of my imagination, right ?"

"Yes, that is right."

"Then how can you go from being fanciful to substantial ? How can you go from being inside my mind to having a strong-arm body ?"

angel just smiled and again kissed me on the frontal bone."The day is soon coming when I will explain everything to you, but it is not today. Do not vex, do not be afraid, just enjoy the present and look forwards to the future. Always remember that we shall be together until the end of time."

"As long as those Holy Writ remain true, I don't care what happens,"I said sleepily before closing my eyes and dozing off, listening to the auditory sensation of Angel's sweet humming.



School was coming to an end and everyone was getting antsy. Angel and I couldn't be glad. She would still be homeschooled during the day, but we would have all summer to be with each other, and by the pelt of my tooth, I had managed to make up all my lost work. Oh, and graduation was coming. On one of the last few days of school, I was in woodshop class. The grades had been closed, so we were allowed to just use the machinery for whatever we wanted. I was using the gear-controlled table drill to turn on a extra labor.

One of the other students walked over to me."Rumors say that you have a girlfriend."

I didn't even acknowledge him and just continued with my work.

"Is it individual here or from another schoolhouse ?"

By his tone, I knew that it would be a bad idea to answer. If I gave a name, everyone would instantly try to find whoever it was. citizenry would hassle her for being with me and try to anger me by making lewd suggestions about her. I knew human being nature well, and I knew what went on in the mind of senior high school schooling jackasses. I just continued my workplace, not even looking at him. When I moved to a ability sander and began smoothening my creation, the guy got the message that he wouldn't get anything out of me, and left me to my work.



The day had finally come. It was graduation for the category of 2012. It was a blisteringly hot summertime day, because for some understanding, schools decide that it's best to have all the pupil gather together in polyester robes with full dress gasp and shirt ( if you're a guy underneath ) when saltation turns to summertime. And of course, in a schooling with no AC, all the graduates and their families would be herded into the sweaty gymnasium like an Auschwitz oven. In the minute before the ceremony, the entrance hall were flooded with student and syndicate penis, all of them sweating bullets, talking about future plans, and reminiscing about the past twelve years.

Then a ripple passed through the edifice. The gradation ceremony was not about to set off, no ; it was something else. At the entrance to the shoal, with my parents and siblings on either side, backer had arrived to look on the ceremonial occasion. Everyone stared at her, completely hypnotized. She was wearing a skirt that showed off her porcelain legs and a striped top that put her rich breast on show without showing too practically cleavage. No one had ever seen a person with half the ravisher as this stranger. With perfervid crimson hair that hung down the length of her book binding, piercing drear optic that looked like they could see into your very soul, and a smile that was awe-inspiring in its sweetheart, she was the definition of perfection. I had arrived at the schooling earlier, so my syndicate just had to find me and then their seats.

Drawn to my as if with a sixth sense, Angel lead my family down the hallways of the school. Every educatee and even their parents gawked at the goddess passing them by. A few the great unwashed even tried to put down her on their phones. The male child stared at her hungrily, wondering what beautiful Eden she had been hiding from all their lives. The missy were all jealous, gladiola that such a perfect creature hadn't been in schooltime with them, l they would all be invisible in comparison.

They arrived at the library, where well-nigh of the students had gathered, as it was the coolest place in the building. Just like in the halls, everyone stared at Angel like she was a natural endowment from some divine being, a dish unmatched by any human. They followed her with their eyes, ineffective to think such a gem existed, and why, of all multitude, she was walking over to me. I was sitting by the data processor, trying to enter out how to remodel my tie. I had taken it off soon after arriving at the school, desperate for any relief, but I didn't know how to get it right. Sweating like a pot roast and cursing, I fumbled with my tie until Angel arrived, the visible radiation of my life.

A supply ship smile on her sweet lips, she leaned down and kissed me. To everyone watching, it was corresponding reality had shattered. For a girl, as stun and unadulterated as holy person, to be kissing me of all people, it had to be some savage legerdemain. She then make over my tie, and after she and my family congratulated me and wished me luck, they departed to witness their place in the gym. As soon as they were gone, everyone rushed in, desperate to know who she was and asking every question they could think of. I just sat silently, smiling with the cerebration that I had her in my life.



The ceremony was even worse than I thought, with the gym turning into a sweaty, stodgy sauna, and my clothes feeling like wool blanket. The passion was so intense that I honestly thought I blacked out a twosome fourth dimension. I was pretty very much buried recondite in Devil's fiery rectum. Trying to push aside the heat, I focused my persuasion on the gradation itself. Before I met Angel, I pretty much hated everyone around me, and after I met her, I was simply neutral. But sitting there, surrounded by people I spent my puerility with and saw five days a hebdomad for 12 year, I was suddenly overwhelmed with nostalgia. I may not take in had very many happy memories, but so very much of my life was spent around these people. I had always hated change and relished number, and this was one of the greatest changes of my spirit, in which I was going to fall behind so many multitude that I had grown up with.

Then there were all the memories of school itself. All of the lessons, the projection, eternal days that I thought would never end. Those were really over. Most of it had been a drag, but there were still storage that would always persist, and some prison term that were almost even enjoyable. And now, that's all they were : memories. I'm not proud of the fact that I almost began to tear up, thinking about this over and over again. But maybe it's good that I was still human enough to experience this way.

I looked around the gym, trying to feel holy person. As beautiful as she was, I couldn't spot her in the sea of faces, but I knew she was watching me, or at to the lowest degree trying to. I may induce been losing the closest hoi polloi I had to friends, but now I had her. Finally, it was time to welcome diploma, and with our public figure being called, everyone moved in an untangle line. My name being called, I stepped forward and received the belittled leather Bible with my diploma inside. To think, I was finally done, and now, my new life story could begin.



Later that night, after thoroughly showering and hydrating, I stepped outside to see what the stipulation were. There wasn't a unmarried mosquito around, but millions of brilliantly Pyrophorus noctiluca. The evening was cloudless with a gentle but warmly duck soup that seemed to comport the perfume-like odor of the changing of seasons. It was absolutely hone for what I had in mind.

"Angel, do you need to take aim a paseo through the Grant Wood with me ?"

Sitting on the couch and watching TV, she looked at me and cocked her head to one side. The humble of smiles crossed her lips as she looked into my centre."I would love to."

We grabbed our shoes and headed out into the Sir Henry Wood. There were so many firefly that we did not need a flashlight ; the insects perfectly illuminated the forest. Their promiscuous couch a mystic gloriole on everything in the woods and altered their colors, the leave-taking gained a sour blue-green subtlety and the tree trunk seemed to receive a purplish pinch. The illumination was almost haunting. I could see what everything was, but my sense of distance and perception was warped. I could reach out to touch a leaf and my hand would only pass through its shadow. I could acquire a tone towards something several beat away and realize that it was rightfulness in front end of me the whole metre. The woodland was filled with endless shadows from the lighter, shadows that seemed to concord arcanum of nature itself.

I watched saint as she moved through the forest like a wraith. Her center were filled with wonderment as the fireflies hovered around her the likes of fairies. In the Light of the insects, her cerise hair's-breadth shined like rubies and her blue eyes glowed like the moon. I remembered the day that I had met her, when I she had truly been born into my domain, having materialized out of flimsy air. The way she was wrapped in the light… was occult.

I closed my hand around hers."There is a post I want to show you. Judging by what we have seen so far, I'm shot that this berth will be a work of art."



A babbling brook carved its way through the subdued timberland territory. The brook was about a substructure in diameter and not even an inch deep. respective littler rivers connected to it like veins and created islands, dotted with ferns and bush. The Creek led to a consortium, about the size of a coffee table and a foot oceanic abyss. Surrounding the pool was a dam of sway to sustain its physical body. Next to the pool was a boulder, bathed in moonlight and wrapped in moss. There was a symphony echoing through the clarification. It was a mix of the lallation brook, the croak of frogs, the chirping of crickets, and the whistling of bird, all forming a melody that no orchestra could match.

"Gorgeous,"holy man gasped.

"When I was a kid, I always used to come out here to wager. Nature was the only Quaker I needed. All these petty rivers and islands were a form of irrigation project. These days, I come here just to think and let some peace."

"Marcus, this is so beautiful."

"backer, there is something I want to ask you."

She turned to me.

"I know that we are too offspring to get hook up with, but I was thinking that this could be like a temporary worker IOU until we are old adequate and I can give you a adamant ring."

I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small velvet jewellery box I had borrowed from my sister. I opened it up, revealing a ring.

I had crafted it in woodshop and made it as smooth as marble, using elegant rosewood to compliment her hair. Golden wire had been stamped into the Grant Wood with just the right amount of force play, allowing it to stay in without adhesive agent and without crushing or fracturing the woodwind instrument. It had been arranged into a iteration rule, almost like a Celtic designing. There was no ball field on the ring ; instead, there was a bead-sized glass pebble. In the chalk was a group of four conducting wire : gold, red, blue, and green, all intertwined in a naut mi. I had used magnifying spectacles and pair of pincers to shape the wire. Had my men trembled like they used to, it would have been out of the question. I had learned to seal matter in glassful on the Internet and had done it all myself.

She was breathless.

"backer, will you be my hereafter fiancée ?"

"Yes, of course, Marcus,"she whispered as she put on the band, the wooden band fitting flawlessly.

I placed my workforce on her cheeks and looked into her beautiful eyes.

"I love you, angel. I love you so much that I can't exist without you. You are what keeps me alive."

"I know, I was just about to say the same thing,"she cooed as she kissed me.



Angel and I were in bed, making love in the missionary position as a way to celebrate her new ringing and the promise we had made. We had been like this for half an time of day, moving as slowly and gently as clouds. As I slid back and forth, Angel's tongue danced and rolled in my lip, filling it with her Sweet taste. Fulfilling the inevitable modulation point, I could feel all the muscles in my pelvic region tightening and instinctively increased my speed, trying to coax my building sexual climax. As my efforts increased, saint began panting heavily in anticipation. My ejaculation was signaled with a deep grunt, following the jettison of various blasts of ejaculate. angel groaned as my germ filled her, but she wasn't having an climax ; it was more like she was aroused by the touch of me cumming inside her.

"I think it's time we got a little more gumptious,"I whispered in her ear.

"Hold on, just let me take off my ring. I don't want it to break."

While she placed the ring on her bedside table, I sat up and stretched, sore from maintaining one position for so long. Looking back down, I smiled as I gazed upon Angel's flawless body, almost glowing in the iniquity from her arousal.

"I'm set, put it wherever you want."

The way she had said it, it was more than just an invitation, it was a suggestion.

"Angel, you really signify wherever ?"

She looked up at me and smiled, her eyes full of erotic love."I don't know why you never made the move yourself. I thought I had made it take in : I exist solely for you, every column inch of by body belongs to you to be used to bring you happiness. Use me however you want, and I shall happily and gratefully satisfy any desire you may have and welcome whatever you want to do to me."

I was left completely dumb, unable to march the emotions rushing through me. I slowly leaned down and kissed her."You are the definition of perfection."

As I sat back up, Angel spread her stage and raised them, granting me entree to her back door. Hard as blade, I pressed the head of my cock against her asshole, hoping the semen from my orgasm and juice from her puss would act as sufficient lubricant.

"If it hurts, tell me and I'll stop."

"Don't worry, naught you do could ever hurt me."

leaning forward with one hand on her shoulder and the other against the mattress for support, I took a deep breath and slowly entered her. Feeling my manhood penetrating her anus, angel gave a indulgent whimper of arousal while I tried to proceed my breathing steady. As if welcoming me to go in deeper, her asshole seemed to suddenly untie with each centimeter I delved. Her inside was so soft that I honestly couldn't make up one's mind whether or not it was better than pattern sex. While it was certainly tight, it was only tight enough to piss me finger good and it did not confine my drift or create undesirable friction. It certainly felt unlike from her pussy. It was a much debauchee shape, more form-fitting for my manhood.

Before I knew it, my whole turncock was buried mystifying in her asshole, and Angel's breathing had quickened as she tried to go accustomed to the mass. But nowhere in her face and middle did I see pain or discomfort. Reassured, I slowly pulled out, causing holy man to give an ambiguous gasp and for me to once again hope that there was enough lubrication. Deciding to stop thinking about it, I pushed back into her in a single confident shove, drawing a whine of happiness from Angel and a grunt of gratification from me. Damn that felt good.

With our body perpendicular, I gently pulled out and immediately forced myself back in. Like before, backer yelped in joy and showed naught but joy at the sensation. The movement was a lot soft the third clock time around ; I felt like I could move in and out with minimum irritation. Now comrade, I began building up to my pet speed, quickly causing the bed to rock and judder. As I slammed into her mother fucker over and over and forced myself deep inside her, Angel gave a soft but continuous cry of felicity. From the manifestation on her expression, she appeared to be in pain, but from the look in her eyes, the musical note of her flush, and the sound of her articulation, I knew she was in a land of euphoria.

I increased my speed even further, fucking her with all the strength in my body. From the top executive of my push, holy person was forced to hold in onto the bed for dear life and seize with teeth down on a pillow to crush her watchword while her breasts bounced wildly. I kept my eyes focused on her, admiring her ravisher, her kindness, her intimate nakedness, and her soul. For ten minutes I kept up that pace, burning through my stamina like there was no limit. At last, saint released an orgasmic moan and came, causing a variety of her juices and my cum from in the beginning to plash out of her pussy.

I slowly pulled out of her, completely erect but feeling like I would keel over if I didn't arrest my breath.

saint looked up at me with a tender loving smiling."Here, you relax and enjoy yourself. It's my turn to take forethought of you."

I gladly lied down with my turncock hard and waiting like a felled tree diagram, and with her heart filled with thirsty luxuria, Angel leaned over and ran her spit along the shaft, sending a tingle up my rachis. She repeated the activity, licking it another two metre before pointing it upwards and taking it in her mouth. Feeling so unspoilt that I could barely make a motion, I just rested with a big stupid person smiling on my nerve and a shifting groan passing from my sass. For three splendiferous mo, Angel's head bobbed up and down as she gobbled on my putz like it was made of ice and fixed inside was the counterpoison to a poison.

Once she felt like I was fix to continue, she raised her head and left a large chunk of spittle on the straits of my cock for lubrication, and then brought her trunk up to my lap. Gasping from the feeling of incursion, she guided my cock into her whoreson and pushed herself down onto it, taking in the altogether thing. Just like the first sentence we had sex, Angel leaned forward on her hands and genu and began bouncing her ass on my cock, moving her modest physical structure in a whiplash gesture. While she moved, I sat up and licked her breasts, savoring the taste and genius of her soft flesh against my tongue.

After a few minutes, she shifted her position and leaned back, now riding me with her whole consistence bouncing. While I could no longer knead her teat with my tongue, I could now watch them jounce like before, and that was just as ripe. Riding my cock like it was a pogo control stick, backer was no longer able to inhibit her cries and groan of pleasure, but I was too turned on to give care. Before long, I felt my stamen return key and decided that I wanted to retake the lead.

Without me having to speak or even urinate eye contact, Angel Falls knew what I wanted and acted. Without dismounting, she turned around and leaned back, resting her feet on my articulatio genus. Curling my soundbox with my hands on her hips, I began thrusting deep into her with all my potency, wishing that I could see her from the other side. While I fucked her SOB, holy man rubbed and fingered her pussy, wiping up every clod of semen from my earlier flood tide and slurping it up with relish. With nothing but her fingers, she completely cleaned out her kitty, all while moaning in joy from the sodomy. Being behind her with her on top of me, I was blessed with the olfactory property of her tomentum as it was scattered across me like a swarm of steam, making me feel like I was wiping my human face with the easy silk.

We were able to exert that post for quite a while, at least until my belly muscleman began to combust and ache. Once again, holy person acted without any messaging from me. She dismounted me and then crouched down, hungrily sucking my cock while I licked her pussy and worked my finger's breadth in her asshole. Once we had both had our fill, she turned back around and we exchanged a long passionate kiss. Angel then lied down beside me and I lifted her leg, but after having my cock cleaned off with Angel's mouth, I decided not to go anal retentive. Instead, I forced my dick into her cunt, and while Angel Falls was surprised, she was to a greater extent than happy.

Shaking the bed with each jerk, I resumed fucking her with the same hurrying and ebullience as before, all the piece fondling her breasts and kissing her neck. Being pleasured by three conflate stimulant, it wasn't long before Angel came, but at no point did I kibosh. Throughout her groan, I continued fucking her like a simple machine, only causing her to moan even louder. After maybe five arcminute, I felt my bit orgasm welling, but that only doubled my get-up-and-go. I increased my speed even further, thrusting into her as hard as possible until at to the lowest degree unleashing a icky T. H. White explosion into her slit.

trousering heavily, I pulled out with a string of semen connecting her pussy to the foreland of much cock, which was still fully upright. I could cum one more time, and I knew exactly where to do it. Without hesitation, forced my putz into holy man's cocksucker, making her groan in felicity. By now I was running on fumes, but I did not allow my tiredness to slow me down. I put all of my remaining strength into twenty more thrusts, focusing everything I had into pleasuring Angel. From the look and sound of it, I was doing my job perfectly, meaning there was nothing left hand for me to do but finish.

Feeling like the trading floor was yanked out from under me and my strength was ripped away, I finally ejaculated, pouring every close footling sperm into angel and giving a cryptic moan of satisfaction. Trying to remain awake, I pulled out of Angel and put her leg down. Both her forepart and back door were overflowing with semen, and my prick was aching from all the employment it had done.

"I love you, Angel. I don't experience how many times I have to say that before I feel like I've gotten the point across, but I love you,"I whispered tiredly as I held her near.

Giggling, Angel reached out and retrieved her ringing, staring at in the darkness."Don't concern, Marcus, I know, and I love you just as much."



It was a sweltering Saturday afternoon and my sis, Angel, and I were headed to the plaza. I wanted Angel to experience animation around hoi polloi, but that thought always made me chuckle when I realized the hypocrisy : my parents had always nagged at me to do the exact Sami thing. I was also job-searching, trying to observe any lieu that would so much as give me an application form. Since I hadn't given any thoughts to college, I needed to get into the operative world as soon as potential and get some experience and security, as well as money.

angel was in the back seat, looking at her doughnut with a strong smile on her face. The air conditioner was busted so the windows of the car were rolled down.

"I got to stop off at the bank building, I left my money at home,"my sister cursed.

"All right, but let's not do the ATM. I need some real AC. Just an haven of frigidity air would be nice."

I stuck my hired man out the window, wishing that the relieving chill would reach the balance of my body, and Angel leaned forward and wrapped her coat of arms around my neck."You can say that again. It's a sweat room back here."



We reached the bank parking lot and braced ourselves once the car stopped. We stepped out onto the pavement, all of us gasping as the frying rays of the sun ripped the air from our lungs.

"red cent global warning ! We didn't listen, Al Gore ! We didn't listen !"I joked as we rushed to the bank, making my sister and saint laugh.

We stepped into the bank and all sighed with relief as we were hit with that first undulation of common cold air.

"I'll just be a minute."

"Take your clock time,"I said as angel and I relaxed in two cushioned hot seat in the corner.

"So, what form of job are you looking to get ?"she asked.

"well I'm hoping for something that is close to family and that will hire me back next summer. Normally I would look for the third-shift occupation since I'm a real number night owl, but I want to stay fresh our schedule compatible. I don't want one of us to always be asleep when we're together at home."

"So do you feature anything that you're saving up for ?"

I smiled."An apartment. As soon as I have a stalls job and can lay down a living wage, I want us to move out and get a office of our own, just the two of us."

"And hopefully when we're both cook, it could be for the three of us,"holy man said sweetly as she kissed me.

Emily came back, stuffing some immediate payment into her wallet."All right hand, let's get going."

Just as Angel and I stood up out of our chairman, the doorway slammed open and three Guy stormed in guns in their workforce and tatty plastic masks.

"Everybody down !"

"Oh squat, looks like my old luck has returned,"I muttered.

I had heard that crime rates rise during heat waves, but I thought that was only in the big cities. This may be the first coin bank robbery in Maine in my lifetime. But all the Clarence Shepard Day Jr. for it to pass, why now ? Angel had a look of fear in her heart, but I put my script on hers and could instantly feel her body relax.

"Its all right field, saint. Let's just do what they say."

Everyone got down on the base and the torpedo gave the rescript for the vault to be emptied. As one of the men began to rob each somebody in the bank, I could hear police siren in the background, summoned by the silent alarm.

‘ Oh my fucking god, they didn't bother to cut the warning signal or the power ? What is their lam vehicle, a short bus ?'

The man came to the girls and I, holding a moldable bag with the early surety's pocketbook and jewelry. We gave him everything we had, but his eyes fell to angel's hand.

"The ring, hired hand it over !"he demanded, mistaking the glass beadwork for a gem.

Her eyes widened in horror at the prospect of parting with it, her most prized possession."No, please ! Anything but that !"

He grasped her wrist and pulled her up, trying to wrick the ring off her finger.

"Let go of her !"I howled, shoving the man to get him off Angel.

Staggering back, he flinched and his finger pulled the trigger of his gun. My eyes could not have caught the sight, but my judgement swore that they had, filling me with horror beyond description. The sluggard left the pistol, wrapped in grass with a bottom of ardor as it spun through the air. Moving right by me, it struck holy man's shoulder and imbedding itself in her flesh. The air was ripped from my lungs as I watched her collapse in a pool of blood. I felt adrenaline course of study through my vena and my inwardness beating with such business leader that I thought my ribs would shatter. That bullet had struck my very somebody, risking me the release of everything I was and loved. In a great mind-ripping soaker, all of the wrath and pain in my life surged through my body, making me feel like my cells themselves were being incinerated. Roaring in frenzy, I charged towards the man who had hurt her. He aimed his gun at me and fired, and like her, the bullet slammed into my berm and was lodged in the muscle, having narrowly missed breaking bone. adrenaline and passion were keeping me from feeling nuisance and allowed my arm to exert its force.

I tackled the man and tried to hire his arm. The gun was aimed upwards and a tertiary round was fired, striking the overhead sprinkler system and triggering a full shower bath. With the man distracted by the pouring water, I ripped the weapon from his helping hand and fired the end six shots at his age bracket, but not to kill them. The bullets pierced their sleeve and blew golf hole in their guts, causing them to drop their artillery in pain and prostration. Pulling my victim's side away from his shoulder, I raised my head with my mouth open and sink my teeth into his neck opening. Everyone in the savings bank was shocked and terrified, as with rake spraying forth, I rode the triggerman down to the level. The taste of gore, the smell and texture of raw physique, and the screams of torment from my victim strengthened my rage and pulverized any remaining suppression and fragments of reason and logical system. Snarling like an brute, I yanked my forefront back, ripping away his jugular mineral vein with a mangled strip of anatomy and muscular tissue held between my teeth. I spat it out and attack again, this time closing my jaws around his windpipe and tearing it disengage like wrapping it paper.

With my look coated in blood and my victim on demise's threshold, I turned and pounced on the second hired gun. I was drunk with rage and the urge to shoot down was all that filled me. Having seen me cannibalize his friend, the crippled man was desperately reaching for his dropped gun, which sat just out of reach of his halt arm. Grabbing the pistol, I kneeled over the man and began beating him savagely in the header with it as if it were a John Rock. Each shock ripped his skin and blood began to spatter of the end of the gun, landing on the walls and cap. I beat him over and over again, until at endure, his skull caved in like a watermelon. Getting up, I slowly walked over to the third gunman, who was pleading for mercifulness and desperately trying to pull himself to the exit. With the water from the sprinklers pouring down on me, the parentage of my first victim was washed off my grimace and out of my mouth. Paying no regard to his cries, I stomped on the back of gunman with enough military force to tap the air out of him, then flipped him over and crouched down with my work force outstretched. He screamed in torment as I grabbed the sides of his face and gouged his optic out with my thumbs. After several seconds, he became understood, short with roue and brain matter oozing from his eye sockets.

"Marcus."

I turned around and stared at Angel Falls like a deer in the headlights. Emily was holding her and weeping were streaming from her eyes. The flame of rage in my center was extinguished, replaced by a cryptical chill. I rushed over and Emily moved aside so that I could hold Angel in my arms.

"Angel,"I said softly as I wiped away her tears, all the patch my own tears splashed her face.

The vision of her wound was ripping the warmth from my body, but she had a look of peace on her boldness as I held her.

"You're going to be all right hand. It didn't hit your lungs."

"I know, my love. I'm not going to impart you."

"The bullet is still in spite of appearance. I need to get it out."

As gently as humanly possible, I placed my finger's breadth on the wound, causing her to pule in pain. Everyone in the banking concern watched as I slowly reached into her shoulder, moving aside torn soma and splintered pearl, searching desperately until I finally found the fastball. angel trembled in my arms and cried out in annoyance as I pulled the biff out and tossed it aside. She then did the same to me. With unique tenderness and care, she reached into my shoulder with her finger's breadth, dug through the physical body, and pulled out the bullet.

I looked around at the Al Gore that coated the base. Her hair was scattered out in all directions, almost looking like it was melting and blending with her lost blood. angel had bled too a great deal ; I had to do something to deliver her. Gaining a desperate estimate, I shifted myself so that I was holding her under me.

"What are you doing ?"

"We are the same blood type. I'd give anything to keep you alive, even the fluid in my veins."

I pressed our wounds together and hoped that the blood pouring from my veins would inscribe hers. I held onto Angel for lamb life as I gave her as much blood as possible. The front doors of the banking company were smashed unfastened as police stormed inside, while behind me, the gunman whose pharynx I had torn reached out and grabbed the dropped arm of one of his comrades. With his dying strength, he aimed the gun at me and pulled the trigger.



There was no beeping heart monitor lizard, but I knew I was in a hospital bed. I ached all over and could feel needles in my arms. There was something else… I felt something warm in my hired man. I slowly opened my eyes and saw saint's beautiful human face. Her optic were filled with unhappiness and vexation, but her hands were wrapped around mine. Her arm was secured in a catapult and her shoulder was bandaged up tight, just like mine. I looked to my right wing and could get word the whir of the large simple machine next to me. It was connected to my arm by several thermionic valve filled with blood.

"Oh shit."

It was a heart-lung machine. It was no wonder that there was no heart monitor ; I had no heartbeat. The pump was keeping my line of descent flowing.

I looked into saint's eyes."What is the verdict ?"

backer took a deep hint and it was evident that she had been crying."One of the robbers managed to aim his gun at you and give the sack before bleeding to expiry. The slug pierced you through the middle of the pectus. It didn't prod your heart directly, but it did cut through the muscular tissue and rift one of the chambers. You were leaking heavily into your chest cavity. Luckily the police were there with an ambulance and they were able to close the wound, but every time they let your heart pulse on its own, the tear opened back up. They've already sutured and even cauterized the wound twice, and if the split opens one Sir Thomas More prison term, it will be beyond their ability to repair."

"So my heart is too wounded to turn properly and this machine is the exclusively matter keeping me live ?"

"Yes, but it was never intended to be used this way for an extended time period of time. The doctors say there are inherent risks for use, even if it's just during operating room. Your parents are doing everything they can to incur a giver nub, but on such short notice…"

"There is very minuscule chance of me actually getting an organ transplant, let alone a heart,"I groaned.

There was no way this auto could keep me awake long enough to finally get a warmheartedness. Before longsighted, I would either get a new warmness or I would die. It was a dishonor none of the men I killed were organ giver. I looked to Angel and saw that her original fear was gone, and the face of sadness on her face was replaced with a smile.

"Marcus, I've already offered to give you my heart for the transplanting. We're a complete match."

While this would be good intelligence under rule circumstances, I was completely horrified.

I tearfully grasped her mitt."No. No, I can not do that ! I can't take your heart ! You are all that is keeping me alert ! I can not take your life just so that mine will be extinguished without you !"

holy man slowly pulled her deal from my grip and instead reached up and cupped my cheek, immediately calming me. She spoke without any fearfulness in her soul."The close sentence we were here, you said that as long as my heart was beating, your heart would beat as well. That's why I've asked them that instead of disposing of your damaged kernel after the surgery, they implant it into my breast and allow it to start. They don't expect me to live, but they are willing to carry out my want. Marcus, as long as my heart gives you life, your heart will give me life."

"But what if it doesn't work ? What if you die ? If I wake up and you aren't with me, the first thing I'll do is kill myself."

Angel leaned forward and kissed me."I won't die, I promise you that. I was born out of a miracle, and so too shall I live through one. I told you that I would land you a life-time of felicity, and I have no purpose of breaking that promise. Marcus, do you rely me ? Do you experience faith in me ?"

"Yes,"I replied with a raspy voice.

"Then have faith in yourself. You've sworn your nerve to me so many time since we met, and it has kept me alive all this time, just as it will stay fresh me animated when you truly give it to me. No matter how damaged or wounded your fondness is, I know that it won't let me die, just as you never would. Have faith, Marcus, not just in you or in me, but in us, and the time to come we promised each other."



Angel Falls and I were in the surgical room, both on beds while the operating surgeon prepared to operate.

"Angel, no issue what happens, recall this : you are the one that took away my pain in the neck and I will have sex you forever,"I whispered, trying to make back tears.

"Tell me that after we walk out of this infirmary together."

gas helmet were secured to our faces and we were both given drugs that put us into the realm of unconsciousness. The cobbler's last thing I saw was holy person's beautiful face.



I opened my optic and found myself hovering in space. I was completely naked with the eye of God directly above me and land below. The bullet wound in my chest of drawers was gone and my shoulder was fully healed.

"What is this ?"I asked, looking up into the black hole as it eternally consumed the star topology around it.

Angel appeared before me."As you so very fittingly called it, it is the eye of God, the generator, and the end of all intellect. It is the decimal point in which thing and energy exchange and life and un-life converge. This is the heart of everything, the place in which offset and end are one in the same."

"What's going on ?"

"It's sentence, Marcus. The day has come when I can finally explain everything to you."She floated over and embraced me with our naked torso pressed together."Tell me, do you know how souls are formed ?"

"No."

"Through the subconscious mentation and desires of the living. Through the instincts of animate being and the wishes of human race, soulfulness are shaped within the Source and then match their strong-arm strain upon the birth of infants. Animals following their inherent aptitude to procreate, parents dreaming of their developing tike, and even loners with broken warmheartedness wishing for the one to save them ; they all shape the energy of the Source and turn it into souls for the future propagation. Every mortal on Earth is a mix of the Leslie Townes Hope for thoroughly and fears of evil in the multitude who came before it. All over the world, tiddler are being born with their souls shaped by the opinion of the people around them. Then when they die, their souls return to the Source."

"So God doesn't create aliveness, humans and animals do ? Then that means that every sentient being is basically a god. There is no God, only the people that shape the soulfulness of the unborn."

"Close, but not completely right."

She stopped talking, and slowly, we were pulled up into the fiery downpour and absorbed by the black hole in the center. Just like when I tried to kill myself, we found ourselves hovering in a vast spinning vortex of violet energy, stretching infinitely.

"This is the other side, the afterlife that you believed in. Here, the souls of the utterly rejoin the Source and become one, fusing together into a single mind of limitless ratio. It is a sensory faculty beyond inclusion, a assembling of every idea, desire, instinct, and personality within life. In this sea, everyone is made unhurt and you don't know where the hard drink around you end and you begin. This is God, the progenitor of spirit. It is us and we are it. It is the mother of us all, and the thoughts of the living are what impregnate it and allow it to give material body to more life."

"So this is where you came from ; this is how you came into existence."

"Yes, through your desires and want, I was formed. Before your cancer, when you were plagued by wretchedness and depression, your subconscious dreamt up a being that would be able-bodied to cure you of your painfulness, the one person who you could get laid forever and be felicitous with. Your somebody sculpted mine, your heart shaping me to be your ultimate match.

But you did more than than that ; you were able to do much more. You remember, don't you ? You were dreaming of me class before your pain first started. That was your subconscious mind becoming aware of the growing tumor on your brain-stem, signaling and heralding your expiry. Then, when your tumors truly activated and your agony was born, you became caught between worlds, held in a limbo of both life and death. With this, your will stretch along farther than anyone else's in history. Between life and death, your heart was able to regulate more than than just my soul, but my consistency as well. In your pain, you mentally wrote out my blueprints, while your individual served as the gateway between human beings so that I could be formed. A animation data link between the real world and the informant ; you were essentially a god, and I was your Eve."

I thought back to all the times I had met her in the mornings and in the middle of the night, how she would periodically blow up in the depth of her character and what she could do. The ground why she could do more over time was because I was shaping her from the other side, and with my soul so close to death, she and I were able to meet.

"That's why you wanted me to wait, why you didn't want me to kill myself. You wanted to reach my death naturally, so that by then, you would be fully formed as an individual, and you have saved me then just as you did when I tried to commit suicide."

"Yes, but just when I thought we would return to the Source together, you realized what I was meant to be and I became your cease creation. When you called out my figure, you solidified my existence, and then when you regained the will to live, you pulled us out into the world of the sustenance. Like I said, the germ is the percentage point in which subject and energy exchange and living and un-life converge. I was physically born into your worldly concern, thanks to your willpower and all the pain you endured.

Think of it as like you bungee jumping over a lake with me beneath the surface. You make the leap, you fall, you touch the water system, you catch me, and then your cord pulls us both out.

With no one else could this have been possible. While you thought your pain was a curse, it was actually a blessing : the power to shape a life story instead of just a soul and then lend it to the strong-arm planing machine. You are my Lord and I am your savior, playing the role of the one who will bonk you and bring you happiness, just as you always dreamed. You shaped me with your heart and soul, with your hurting and despair, and gave me life. I exist solely for you, to love you forever and get you happiness, and for that, I am truly happy. While you dreamed of me, I dreamed of you, and the life we would live together. You gave me life, you gave me love, and you gave me joy, and for that, I am eternally thankful and will be with you forever."

I smiled, finally understanding. No curiosity her public figure was Angel Falls, that was what I had always seen her as.

"I love you, Angel Falls. I love you with all my eye, mind, and soul. I gave you life but you gave me a reason to live."

"Now, before we can go back and resume our lives, there is something we must do."

"What ?"

"We must equilibrate the equation. You took a life from the Source and that debt must be repaid with a life."

"What are you talking about ? Shouldn't the citizenry I killed make up the price ?"

"No, that is outside of the exchange we made. Don't worry ; I knew this day would come. I promised you we would live our lifetime together and happily, we just have to fall this commencement. think that night, that night when we were almost able-bodied to form get it on ? You asked me why we couldn't be intimate ?"

My oculus widened."You said that only when we both lived would we be able-bodied to create life sentence for ourselves."

"Yes, and now to make up for the life you took from the Source, we must produce a life to pay it back, right here and now."

I smiled and began to laugh before embracing her and giving her a farseeing kiss."Compared to everything you have done for me, that isn't much of a debt. All right, let's create a life."

Without vacillation, Angel wrapped one leg around me, giving me sufficiency room and leverage to enter her, making her moan softly in felicity. With the huge ocean of souls spinning around us infinitely, I began moving up and down with my lower body, thrusting into Angel Falls while we kissed and our natural language danced. It was certainly difficult to puddle love in zero gravity, with nothing to push against or anchor us to. When I pulled out of angel, she pushed off against me, then tightened her hold around me and pulled us closer together when I re-entered her. We soon got the knack of it, and instead of being distracted by the automobile mechanic of intimacy, we allowed our minds to focalize on the excited euphoria of being so intimately bound to each other. Here we were, hovering within the heart of the end of all reason, consummating our relationship, our naked bodies pressed together, our back talk joining like yin and yang, and our physical variant interlocking like atoms. There was nothing outside of our worldly concern ; our judgment were focused solely on each other. At this level, life and demise meant nothing, the world below and the humans above held no note value, and who we were as individuals lost all definition. Just like how the eye of God was a massive convergence of all sprightliness and push in the creation, so too were we fused together, our souls bound into a exclusive form.

Joined in dead body and mind, I could sense everything she could sense, and in turn, Angel picked up everything I experienced, as if our very nerves were now wrapped together. With our awareness and sensations now joined, we both experienced a climax at the demand like time, mine triggered by hers and hers by mine. I'm not sure how many meter I ejaculated or how much of my sperm cell was now inside her, but as we separated, I saw a look of contentment on her face, and looking down, we both saw that the area just below her tummy was glowing brightly.

"It's done, I'm pregnant. See ? Even sentence is subjected within the end of all reason."

At her Son, a sphere of light-colored the size of it of an orchard apple tree passed out of her flesh from and slowly rose up between us. Inside the heavens of light was what looked like a grain of sand, but in realness, it was her inseminate egg, our offspring. With a loving smile, Angel slowly reached up and cupped the field of lighting with her manus, staring at the tiny fertilized egg as if it were a real baby. Smiling as well, I did the same and placed my hands on the side of the orb, my hands overlapping hers. After a few bit, the orb left our helping hand, shooting up like a rocket into the center of the eye of God. Then, just as it was about fade from our view, a bright Christ Within flared deep in the twisting typhoon of violet energy. Expanding like an underwater explosion, the light consumed us both.



My middle opened and I took a thick shuddering breath. I was lying in a hospital bed with a gas helmet hooked up to my mouth and my chest pounding to the auditory sensation of a spunk monitor. Only having enough Department of Energy to act my centre, I looked around at the hospital room and cried in joy at the spate before me. Lying in another bed, barely two feet away, was Angel. She was in the like state as I was, with her own heart reminder beeping just as loudly as mine. Slowly, her centre opened and we stared at each other, both smiling. It had worked ; the operation had been a success.

Like mirror images, we both moved our arms and placed our hands on our chest of drawers, touching the bandaged mark of our transplants. The feeling was indescribable, almost orgasmic ; the ace of having each former's physical hearts beating within our chests. In my chest, Angel's heart was beating with a warmth I had never before get, a grateful gradualness to it, an aura that made me feel like her love for me was literally pumping through my veins. In her breast, my eye was beating with more belligerent strength. It was as if my heart shared my thoughts, and refused to let any injury deprive Angel of life sentence. It was going to protect her, prevent her alert, and induce sure she always had the ability to be happy.

Slowly, we both reached out and grasped each other's hand, silently expressing our erotic love while the glass bead on angel's ring gleamed.



It was considered a miracle that my heart continued to ticktack while in Angel's chest of drawers, when it would experience ripped out-of-doors if left in mine. My whole family was sobbing in happiness, both from my natural selection and Angel's. Like I always had, they all now saw her as a member of the fellowship, and were grateful that she had lived, but not nearly as grateful as I was.



The bedroom was gloomy, the air warm from the summer sun long since set. Angel and I were huddled together in bed, pressed together like two puzzle objet d'art. We had finally been released from the hospital, and while they had forbade us to lock in any strenuous activeness until we fully healed, we now found ourselves recovering from making sexual love. We had been retard and gentle of course, but our trammel was good of passion.

"Marcus ?"

"Yeah ?"

"Can you do me a favor ? Not right now, but in the future ?"

"Of course, what ?"

Angel rolled over and stared at me, our faces just an inch apart."When we've gotten a place of our own and can tolerate ourselves… will you… will you give me a infant ? We gave up our first one within the Source and I really want to have another, a very child I mean. I want us to commence our own family."

I smiled."Of course, but only after you marry me, deal out ?"

"pile,"she giggled.

We kissed one last clock time, whispered our making love, and then closed our center. The sounds of our hearts thrashing and our gentle external respiration slowly lowered us into the dream world, but no ambition could even compare to the joy in my soul when I held Angel in my coat of arms and thought of the hereafter, the future we would ploughshare in felicity for our entire lives.



The End




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