I 'm Gon na putting to death Her

by gonetopot

'' baton. Hey, he-goat, you home ? ``

'' Do n't come in here Jack-tar. Just stick outside, please. ``

Please ? he-goat never says please. That was Tom, whispering. Three of us stood on he-goat 's porch, not sure what to do. We could hear Billy muttering something but it made no sense.

-CRASH-

Man, you ca n't ignore a smash. Billy is our Quaker. So in the three of us went.

Oh hoot. Do n't laugh, do n't express joy, oh god .... and all three of us were on the flooring, gasping for breath, unable to block off shrieking with laughter.

Billy lay there, not making a sound. We finally pulled ourselves together.

'' Sorry billy club, really meritless man, it just caught us off precaution. You know we love you man. Oh god '' and off we went again.

We finally calmed down enough to loosen Billy from the chair. That must consume been the smash, the chair tipping over. But Billy, our bud, oh man. billy goat just lay there, glaring at us, not making a sound.

'' Billy, who did this to you ? It 's really bad man. We 'll aid you sound off their ass, we swear man. Whoever did this is wickedness. ``

And we all really meant it, even if billystick did n't consider us because it might be hard to take in us grievous when we could n't lay off snickering while we said it.

nightstick had no hair. I mean none, not a bit. We could see hair all over the floor but none of it was on Billy any more. And we had to break looking at him because every time one of us did it ruined any attack to take it seriously, because Billy 's Ball were purple, I mean brilliant purple but that was n't what we could n't sustain our eye off of. baton 's pecker looked like a barber pole, red and white-hot stripes from the groundwork to the tip and the tip was bright red and his peter was all firm because of some closed chain at the base of it and ... ..off we went again.

Finally, we could n't laugh any more than and nightstick just lay there, not saying anything but it sounded like he was whispering and so we stopped making dissonance and listened substantial close.

'' I 'm gon na obliterate those bitch. I 'm gon na get hold her and her sister and cut them up in minuscule part and bolt down them. ``

Oh crap, Nadine and her sister Cheryl. They were at it again. I almost wish Billy had taken our advice and left town after the divorce. For almost a twelvemonth now billy and Nadine had been at war. She keyed his truck, he put rotted fish in her car and business firm. She broke his windows, he poured XXX gallons of sewage in her bedchamber, and on it went. But until now they had never touched each other. Oh man, this was really bad. Billy could be seriously mean if he wanted to. We all remembered when Nadine 's drunk dad went after Billy when they were in the eighth grade. He was a big man, and a mean drunkard. He must have outweighed billystick by L pounds. Billy took a hunk of 2x4 and broke his knee. He told him if he ever beat Nadine again he 'd rip out his tongue. Nadine 's dada left Town when he got out of the hospital. Nobody ever messed with billy again and Nadine was in love.

billy club is a right shop mechanic, like his dad and uncle, and after they graduated from high gear school baton married Nadine and went to wreak. Billy worked toilsome to pay Nadine anything she wanted and after their niggling fille was born he worked even harder. That 's when the problems started. billy was working so hard Nadine was feeling left out and when she complained to Billy he told her he had to influence for her and the baby. Nadine was too Thomas Young to understand that baton was building their future. She wanted fun now. So she went out and got it. She started going to the dancing mansion house with her sister. difficulty was, Cheryl was a year older and single and a bit untamed. She convinced Nadine it was ok to imbibe and dance and flirt as long as she did n't fuck some early man.

truncheon had worked some overtime to buy Nadine the new big screen tv she wanted for her birthday. When he brought it in the house his wife was n't home. The baby-sitter told truncheon that Nadine and Cheryl left after dinner and went dancing. billy club drove to the terpsichore mansion house. The timing was just plain wrong. billy saw some guy dancing with his wife, his helping hand all over her ass and just as he started after them the guy kissed Nadine and sadly, she kissed him back. Billy walked right up to them, slammed a fist into the guy tabernacle and he went down like a broke axle. He did n't say a single Christian Bible to anyone, just turned and walked out. Nadine ran after him, begging him to stop but he got in his truck and push off. He did n't come dwelling house for three years and after that he still would n't talk to her. He got up early, showered, dressed, and left for work. He did n't do home until almost ten every Night and went straight to bed. After a duet of months of that Nadine was going crazy.

speculation it was Cheryl that screwed everything up. truncheon came home one Nox and Nadine and the baby were gone. Billy never said a thing, just got up and went to work, seven days a week.

A few months later Nadine filed for divorce, claiming truncheon give adultery. She had a composition signed by some woman saying she and truncheon had been screwing for four month. Billy said zip and did nothing so when it went to the judge. He read all the papers, looked at nightstick and asked `` Any of this shit admittedly billy goat ? ''. billy goat took care of the Book of Judges cars and the judge liked him. Billy just stared at the jurist and he sighed, `` Did n't consider so but since you have no proof and I have a signed newspaper publisher ai n't nothin'I can do ''.

Billy ended up with zilch, except work. I guess Nadine was just plain pissed that Billy ruined their animation together. She started it. Every time she did something to piss billy club angry he just waited a while and struck back. The local sheriff was trying his respectable to detain out of their trivial war but Cheryl kept filing complaints and Billy just said nothing.

But now Billy was talking, well, whispering mostly and we listened and we got a niggling scared. We think Billy snapped inside his head. We got Billy cleaned up as best we could and cleaned up his house. I told Tom to hustle on over to Cheryl 's and narrate the girlfriend they better run and hide out for a while because they went too far and billy goat was talking and the talk was very bad, for them.

But nothing happened. Billy went back to work. billy club 's uncle told Cheryl that if she or Nadine said or did anything to offend Billy he was going to fire their theatre down with them in it. Since Billy 's uncle was meanspirited than billystick they realized they screwed up bad and stayed away from all of them. Billy only worked six days a week now. On Sunday he would get in his truck and go away. We had no idea where. The three of us tried following him a couple of times but you ca n't catch Billy 's truck on the open road.

Cheryl disappeared first. One day she just was n't there. Nadine said she saw her sister Saturday dark at the dance manse and on Sunday she was just gone. Heck, every once in a spell Cheryl would find a new man and disappear for days at a time. The sheriff did spill the beans to Billy and his uncle and his dad but nix came of it. Two days later Nadine disappeared. effective matter the baby miss was at grandma 's theatre. We all wondered if billystick had done it - you know, what he whispered. We were all a bit afraid now. I talked to billy club 's dad and he just said to stop worrying because billy was a good boy.

Sunday sunrise came. nightstick 's dad called me and said everyone should get a piffling religion and be in church. Our church is n't that big, might maintain a hundred or so and it was just plain packed and all abuzz because Nadine and Cheryl were in the nominal head pew, just sitting there all hush. They looked fine but when I tried to talk to Nadine she shushed me and told me to just sit down.

The sermonizer had the biggest grin. He thanked everyone for showing up and said he had n't seen this big a crowd since the city manager wife had twins in church. The preacher said we had a visitor who had something to say. Never seen the charwoman before. She said she was the one who signed the report about Billy and her and she was sorry because it was all a lie. She did n't even get laid nightstick. She said Cheryl paid her a hundred bucks to sign it. After she had her say she left but she did tell truncheon she was really sorry.

It was quiet after she finished talking. All of a sudden Cheryl form of groan and said 'oh god oh god ooohhhhhhhhh ggggoooooooodd'and she kind of wiggled around but she did n't get up. Right after that Nadine whimpered and said 'nooo, please, not in church, nnooooooooo'and she wiggled some but she did n't get up either.

The sermoniser just stood there. Then both Cheryl and Nadine started shaking and moaning and then they both screamed real loud and sort of slumped over. Doc went right up to check up on them. First thing he said was 'well I 'll be damned. No wonder they ca n't travel'. The sheriff went up to take a facial expression. Seems Cheryl and Nadine had a wide-eyed leather strap across their lap, under their blouse but on top of their skirt, and it was bolted to the pew. The could n't propel if they wanted to. The sheriff looked at the strap and said it was a honorable job and it would have some instrument to get them loose. While he was talking both girls started moaning again and then screaming and shaking a lot. They stopped material sudden and just sat there, sweat pouring off their faces but they did n't say a word. The sermoniser told everyone to sit where they could and jubilate that the two lost sheep had been found. He talked a bit about Lunaria annua and trust and caring about each other. He said sometimes when folks ca n't figure out how to peach to each other they should ascertain soul who can help. Then he told everyone to go on nursing home and the sheriff could find some tools and cut the girlfriend loose.

Billy had been standing at the back of the church all this time, as usual saying cipher. As folks were filing out of the Christian church Cheryl and Nadine started moaning and screaming again. I was watching billy 's face. snug matter I 've seen to a smiling on billy. Then he turned and walked off, got in his truck and drove away.

The three of us went over to Cheryl 's house later. She was laying on the sofa and said she was sorry for the way she treated billystick and she just wanted to be left alone. She said Nadine was over at Billy 's grandmas house with the baby and she was n't going to be living with her any more. So we wandered over to grandma 's mansion. I know, we 're nosey but darn it, we wanted to know what was going on. Nadine turned six shadowiness of red when we showed up at grannie. She tried to shoo us off but we all grew up together and she knew she could n't keep us away forever. Nadine said billy club had been using his Sunday to track down the fair sex who lied about him. When he found her he made her severalize the evaluator the Truth. He took Nadine and got the truth from her and then he got her and took both of them to the judge. The judge told Billy he could receive all three of the women in jail if that 's what he wanted. he-goat said no to that and told the judge what he was going to do and the evaluator told Cheryl and Nadine to do exactly what billy goat said or they would go to jail.

That was all very well and I told Nadine we got that but what about all the scream and wiggling in church. Nadine turned six more shades of red and said Billy bought some form of electronic buzzers and he put them in stead in her and Cheryl they had never put matter like that in and he kept turning them on and off and she found out those doorbell really made you jump and holler. grannie finally told us to quit laughing or get out, so we got out.

We all figured Billy and Nadine would get back together after that but it did n't take place. Billy did severalize me once that he felt bad for not talking to Nadine more but he was n't going to be married to a woman who did n't trust him to restrain his pecker in his pants.

Oh, doc told Billy the india ink the daughter used on him would wear off in a twelvemonth or two. Once the word got out about Billy 's barber pole cock and bright purpleness balls a lot of girlfriend in the county kept truncheon too busy to figure out more than five days a week.

Cheryl got married and I guess she is n't so wilderness any more but Tom is real heedful not to make her too mad. Nadine still lives with grandma and her little lady friend is a very cutie. Billy comes over a lot to visit his grandma and play with his daughter. Nadine told me she crys once in a while because she misses Billy.

I 'm courtin'the preachers daughter. She 's a good cleaning lady and slow going. Last night she did say she found out where Billy got those bell .... oh my .