When I used to travel on business I would occasionally post an ad in the Craigs list Men-for-Women section. It was mostly a way to shoot down time while was alone in a hotel room. I 'd write something fun, like `` child Oil, vino & Hot Tub - What Could Be Better ? '' The consistence of the post would be well written, in gross sentences, with right punctuation. If you ever looked at CL listings, these basic tone made the ad stand out from the formula `` HMU 2 F $ # @ '' type fare.

As an older lily-white guy ( just over 50 when I posted this exceptional ad ), it 's not like my in-box got flooded. The answer were mostly from Russian defrauder, prostitutes, and drug addict. Depending on how bored I was, I 'd turn the tables on the gouger, be overnice to the street girl, and point the addicts toward local anaesthetic treatment centers.

Occasionally, I 'd get a hit from a real, actual human being. Most e-mail were guy wire offering blow line of work. Once in a blue lunation, a cleaning woman would respond.

One day, I received a confidently written reply that did n't have the English-as-second-language clues that revealed a alien scammer. The note simply answered my query about `` what could be better. '' The adult female whom I would amount to know as Madison wrote, `` umber would be better. '' Opinionated I thought. I like inviolable women. In gain to the open line declarative, she wrote only these intelligence, `` Are you single ? ''

Opinionated, laconic and moral.

My reply did n't lie, but I agreed with her assessment, then offered dark hot chocolate along with a organic structure rub. She responded, `` Well, I am adamant, so I do n't opine you can change my mind, although you may be capable to make my mind. Strong, masculine hands on my cushy, middling body is so enticing and intoxicating. I could use a body rub ... I have been working really hard on my thesis and am quite fatigued. I wish I could come. : ( I am just very serious about respecting other women and their human relationship, even if I do n't know them. ``

The extra particular in her Federal Reserve note revealed a deepening curiosity. Expecting nothing more than electronic mail - which I knew would end if I offended her or she simply lost interest - I pressed on just for fun. Plus, because I live my work life at a keyboard creating stories for a living, it was a welcomed misdirection from my regular life, and offered hope for the perpetual hole I felt in my marrow about longing to be with a woman who wanted to be with me ( the understanding I did n't just hire a birdcall girl ).

Soon we exchanged pic. I knew she was in college ( the thesis tipped me off ), so when she saw the real 50-something me, I figured it 'd be over. It wasn't.

She wrote, `` I really palpate obliged to say that if you are really trying to get me to meet then you will not succeed. I just do n't desire you to waste your time. I really do consider it is haywire to be with individual who is married or in a relationship, and I am very conscientious about that.

'' But I do really like your photos though. You look smart and handsome in the upright way possible. You are definitely a secure bit sometime than me but very much my type physically speaking with your pilus and skin. You 're lovely. I love it. : ) Very sexy. And seeing your stiff manus makes me want you to dedicate me a thigh massage.

'' As for me, I am 22. I am writing my undergraduate, senior thesis on The Plague by Prince Albert Camus. I am individual. I love language, especially Latin and Ancient Hellenic. I spent a month in Italy lowest summertime ; I love to travel. I enjoy baking moolah. I love the symphony and the opera house. And I love to eat. : )

'' What do you reckon of my photograph ? ``

Oh my. What did I think ? I was looking at a college girl who was flirting with me ! My feelings raced from disbelief to being flattered, excited, enchanted and seriously aroused.

Madison exuded the girl-next-door looking with mass medium brown hair that hung past her shoulders. Even though the photo was not at all revealing, she had beautiful womanly curves. think a classic Rubenesque example minus 20 lb and you 're picturing Madison. Her sparkling eyes and welcoming smile were simply, well, just pretty. Melt-me cute. And pure.

Of class, she was not completely pure. Like me, like everyone who pursues what they need but ca n't find through normal channel, Madison was n't totally sinless. Like me, she had started down a vague path of her own. Fortunately, somehow we 'd met.

My business plans put me in the Southern city near her college in the dead of winter. Our e-mails took on an urgency because the opportunity to meet was ours to lack. I suggested coffee. Her reaction revealed a longing. `` Of track, I am curious about what it would be like to be with you. I ca n't say that I was n't fantasizing a little in my morning social class about your workforce on my second joint. Honestly, I wish I could go with you to dinner tonight, but I do n't have a way to get there. It has been about a year since I have been with a man who knew something about build up and prolonged Passion. It is something I love and something that takes me to ecstasy, and something about which many men know practically null. I would make out a buildup of volume tonight.

'' If I went even to dinner with you, I think that I would want you to make at to the lowest degree a little love to me, but since I wo n't let that happen since you are attached, it would just be anguish for me. I ca n't stop wishing you were single ! But I just ca n't go against my moral sense. I want kisses on my neck opening and ear. I dislike this inner struggle. : ( ``

Driven by the deepest need to gratify my marrow, I rationalized the situation in a line back to her, `` To put things into view, you 'll likely do sorry things in your life than see me. At least if you see me, there 's a terrific upside. Some things are worth it. The reality of how I could make you feel : Worth it. The store of what we 've shared. Worth it. The risky venture. Worth it. ``

I did not tell her that for me, the assignation would regenerate my intensity level to last out in my outwardly hone married couple that was otherwise killing me ... slowly sucking the cacoethes and vigour from my soul due to my wife 's aroused and physical disinterest. Being with Madison took on duplicate urgency as I realized she could be so deeply important to me at a stage she could n't possibly understand.

James Madison resisted and resisted until she did n't. Dozens of email tracked the lesson battle. Either of us could give birth walked away. Neither did.

We 'd hold to meet at a wine-colored bar for dinner. I got there a bit too soon and ordered a Riesling. Then a second. I 'd positioned myself in the very back of the restaurant, faced so I could see the door. capital of Wisconsin arrived. She was prettier than her photos, and I had n't realized how magniloquent she was, at least 5'8 ''. She did n't see me, so I stood up and walked to greet her. We paused for a moment, eye to eye, my hands in front end of me to gently welcome her by taking her 's and leading her to our mesa. It was going to be a Nice evening.

Still to this here and now I ca n't recall the attire she was wearing, except that had a modestly mysterious neckline with a lace up feature. I did my best to celebrate my eyes on hers, but her sizable boob made for the most beautiful cleavage.

We talked for a patch, noshed on some great intellectual nourishment, drank a little ( more ) vino, and then Madison announced she needed to go. It was n't late, but I knew she was working on her thesis, and I did n't want to impinge on her studies.

being that it was truly freezing out ( below 32° ), I asked if she 'd mind driving me back to my hotel. She agreed. As we walked to her car, she sheepishly admitted she 'd forgotten where she parked. Then she realized she did n't deliver cash to pay the parking fee. I found this so enchant and innocent.

Perhaps as a life metaphor regarding needs, as we were walking, she shivered. I put my arm around her and turned up the collar on her wool coating. She 'd never known you could do that ! I guess when Georgia is your home, what comes naturally to those who grew up in the frosty Mid-West would n't be bit nature. Then she slipped on some ice. I instinctively caught her. That moment it was Madison who melted a piffling. I kept her warm and condom that walk.

The dinner party and walk surprisingly revealed, that despite our age divergence, we clicked. Our personalities and deep-seated needs meshed in a way I still do n't empathise. This girlfriend with whom I was walking was so young, pretty, chic and vivacious that I did n't need her to go. I told her I 'd care some desert. She coyly asked, `` What are you hungry for ? '' deep brown was the just appropriate verbal reply, although my eye said otherwise. I casually noted, as if by coincidence, that I had dark chocolate in my room. As we pulled into my hotel, she was the one to paint a picture that she 'd care to come up.

You could have knocked me over with a feather. Never in a million years.

As for what happened next, capital of Wisconsin 's diary entry puts it in her Son. She sent the words below in an electronic mail. This is what she wrote in her journal. The natural process picks up after she gets into her friend 's borrowed car and drives away from the university :

'' dearest diary, I decided to go and cope with him. The tension within myself was too neat for me to suffer, so I had to go. I think our e-mail exchanges made meeting that much more exciting. I did not put much care into my underthings when getting fix as I had no mind of what was to amount. But I put on my royal bluish silk attire. It is one of my favorite frock. It is a piano, alright 100 % silk dress and it makes men want to put their blazonry around me. It is delightfully and teasingly low cut although it shows but a glimpse of segmentation. It is a very classy apparel. It ties above the breasts ; I like to fancy that when men see it they just want to unlace it and pop out kissing me. I curled my hair and put on light makeup as well as my rose oil scent. In my very baseborn but very accurate opinion, I looked lovely.

'' I drove to the city, and I felt a little queasy as I walked to establishment. It turned out to be the perfect place for our tryst. I like to conceive of how we looked that eve, all dressed up and full of desire. I walked in, and I did not see anyone. I thought he would be sitting future to the door observation for me. I felt a minuscule pang of dismay as I looked about and did not see him. But after a few indorsement, he stood up and I caught great deal of him. He was sitting in the spine ; I walked to him, and the moment I saw him I knew it was going to be a endearing, quixotic evening. People most often look more attractive in scene than in material biography. But it was the paired with him. He was so handsome. He was definitely quite a bit old than I was, but the age deviation did not feel too pronounced. I felt that we were on the Saami wavelength. I wonder what were his thought when he first saw me. He wears meth. I love glasses on a man. He was wearing a sweater that looked to be very soft and a silk tie. He has very just taste and seemed young at heart. When I approached him, he welcomed me with an embracing and kissed me on the cheek. My bosom began to waver and to mellow a lilliputian. It was so romanticistic and made me feel so womanly. I wish I could hold played that scene again and again. I loved him kissing me on the face upon meeting me. He is such a wild-eyed, gentlemanly man. He helped me out of my coat and pulled out my chair for me to sit down. He is absolutely my character physically and intellectually. I loved his part and his style of dress. I loved his taste in food.

'' He sat down, and we conversed a little before the waitress came over. I ordered a Pinor Noir ; he already had his wine-colored. I was surprise that he preferred white wine. With his romantic, sensual personality, I would have thought that he would prefer a iniquity, sultry red. One thing that I found irresistibly attractive about him was his vocabulary. Most men ( indeed well-nigh modern the great unwashed ) have a very specify vocabulary, because masses do n't read practically and lieu watch tacky tv. I have a fairly talkative vocabulary because I study Romance and Greek and because I read a lot. But I love that he used words like `` egregious '' and `` bucolic. '' I thought it was very sexy.

'' We had a most pleasant conversation. We talked about traveling. I talked about my shoal and work, and he told me about his study. The tension between us was palpable. I loved it. I caught him looking at my breasts twice, and it made my centre beat a niggling faster. But he did not look at them in a crass way but rather in an look up to way. I wondered what he was thinking when he looked. Was he wondering how easygoing but business firm they would feel under his touch ? Was he wanting to kiss them softly ? Was he wondering what my mamilla looked like ?

'' The atmosphere of the restaurant was perfect. I have only been able to drink legally for a picayune over a class, so I still feel the novelty of meeting someone for a glass of wine. It was pleasantly dim inside and the music was utter. Norah Mother Jones and weenie Sinatra were playing as well as other such artist. I just love the tensity between man and woman. I knew that both of us were full of desire but I love the tension before the desire is played out. I knew that he was pursuing me, and I loved it. I loved how quixotic he was. He had a fantastic smile too ; it was very contractable. Oh and his deal. His hands were incredibly sexy. I do n't make out why, but I could not stop looking at them. They were so aphrodisiac. They looked so warm. I kept trying to keep myself from imagining them massaging my breasts and kneading my thighs. Them sliding up my privileged thighs and spreading my branch apart. Imagining his finger's breadth sliding into the shadow wetness of my flower ... His handwriting were intoxicating. It did n't facilitate when he got up to use the restroom and as he walked behind me he put his right deal on my upper powerful arm. My heart fluttered, and I reveled in the sweetness intuitive feeling of desire and arousal that was blossoming inside me. I knew he was trying me to see what would materialise, and I soaked up every s of it. I kept thinking about that simple touch. When he came back, he pulled his chair closer to mine, and I felt the result of that between my ramification. Our faces got quite close at times. I ca n't say that I did n't suppose his lips on the lips of my efflorescence and his mouth enclosing my mamilla inside it.

'' He said, `` How does it experience to stimulate person sitting so close to you who wants to make love to you ? '' I said something to the result that it happens not infrequently. He said he was not surprised. He stopped a little a one breaker point and said something quietly. I asked him to ingeminate himself, and he said, `` You 're just so pretty. '' I felt a minuscule bashful at such exposed admiration, but I also felt so attractive under his gaze. Another fourth dimension, after I caught him casting a furtive glance at my breasts, he said it again. `` You 're just so pretty. '' I loved that solid dinner. It felt so sensual and romantic. He kept looking at me with such deepness in his eyes. He would gaze at me for quite a long time, and I would feel a little shy.

'' But my thoughts were not just sexual to be trusted. I loved the romance of it. I loved how intelligent and well-traveled he was. And he paid for the meal which is very attractive. I had the impulse to put my hand on the table and let him hold it and stroke it, but I resisted the impulse. He definitely was very attractive to me intellectually. He seemed to have knowledge in a all-encompassing variety of areas. I just felt drawn to him like a attractor. I tried not to show it of course. I wanted him to engage, not me. He looked at me in a very draw in and admiring manner. I am sure that I blushed a little at least. Oh his custody. I kept thinking about him slipping his arm around my waistline. And about his hired man going dangerously low.

'' When we stood up, he helped me into my coat and after it was on, he put his hands on my waist and again I felt a warm, familiar curling genius between my legs. We walked out ; I even love even the way he walks with so a great deal confidence. We got out and it was so cold. But I love it being dusty because it is so romantic. it makes one need to snuggle up. And it gave me a thoroughgoing apology for me to put my arm in his. I was delighted to be so closing curtain to him. He was certainly laughing at me a little because I could n't remember where I parked, and I had never heard of putting your collar up to keep your neck opening warm. But I did n't mind it because I knew that he knew I was intelligent. I loved it when he stopped to put my arrest up because his sexy hands were on me a little.

'' I very much enjoyed the frigid base on balls back. We walked to the little fountain falls. I took his bridge player and stepped over to the stone's throw nearer the jet. His hands are very strong. I imagine them pinning my arms over my head and kissing me. Holding me down pat and making me yield to pleasure. I wanted a kiss near the spring but it was much too soon. I loved snuggling up to him on the walk. His arm around me or holding my hand.

'' And then he said he had chocolate in the way, and I made the fatal hint of going to eat chocolate in the way. I drove to the hotel, and he was very gentlemanly, opening all the doors. It made me feel very womanly. We got in the elbow room and I flopped onto the bed. Later I discovered that such a careless movement made him desire to make dear to me. ``

An aside here : The quondam one gets, if they bother to observe how Loretta Young hoi polloi move, they 're much more bouncy than adults. imagine a group of school girls talking excitedly in a shoal hall, and you 'll get the estimation. So Maddison walks into the room and on her way toward the window, she bounces on the bed. It was so cute and inadvertently sexy that I muttered to myself, `` I 'm a numb man. I ca n't believe this is happening. ''

capital of Wisconsin 's journal entry continued, `` Under the guise of going to look at the charlotte horizon, I walked over to the window, and he came up behind me. Just his tightfistedness made my heart beat very fast. He stood behind me and ran his fingertips on my upper arms. My speed blazonry are a very erogenous part of my body, perhaps because they are so close to my breasts. I loved it. I was becoming so call down. He started massaging my backbone. His strong paw massaging my backrest made my knees washy, and so I went over to the bed.

'' What happened next is a delicious fuzz in my headway, but many matter stand out distinctly in my mind. He leaned a little on the dominant English which I loved. He was certainly romancing me, making love to me. His work force were intoxicating. I loved him kissing my neck and my arms. I ca n't recall what order matter happened in, but I will recall all that I can. My will was wavering very much. When I first sat down, he started rubbing my thighs. I loved it. Watching his handwriting rub my thighs was rash indeed. He was arousing me so much. He took off his jumper at one detail and started unbuttoning his shirt, but I took over and finished unbuttoning it. I liked his bureau. I liked running my helping hand over it and sliding my handwriting on his lower abdomen and a little under his pants. Finally, he took off his pants. And there was his rooster in all its inclemency. So intimate. I took it in my hand. I touched it and played with his balls. I really liked his clump ; it was very pleasurable to me to collapse him such pleasure.

'' One of my best-loved parts was when he started kissing my titty. My dress and bra were still on. But I loved it when he untied the tie on my dress. And opened me up. Exposing my cleaving to his pot and touch. I am passably sure that I cried out loudly when his lips and hired hand came in contact with my breasts. I pushed him away, but he kept on kissing and touching. Finally, I took off my bra and unzipped my clothes. He pulled my frock over and exposed my tit. I felt myself going godforsaken knowing that he was gazing upon it. He kissed it, and he made me wino. The feel of his tongue on my breast, his fingertips. I loved watching it all ; I can never give enough of it. I am a very optical somebody. I love watching everything he does to me. The mickle is inebriating. I took off my frock, and I love what he did. He stopped what he was doing for a second, and he looked me in the eye and said, `` You are beautiful. '' And then he returned to my white meat. It felt like he could n't keep his hands off my teat. He was driving me to ecstasy. He would wet his finger's breadth on his spit and play with my boob in a manner that would repel me wilderness. He would pull my nipples. And I loved that he was rough out with them. I love it that he was not restraining himself. I remember very vividly once when he was licking my right hand breast. I could see his tongue running around my pap and licking my nipple. It was so sexy. I wanted that tongue on my flower.

'' I wanted him to pin me down so I wove his fingers in mine and made him pin my limb above my head. My flower was soaking. He sat on me and played with my mammilla. I loved it. And I loved seeing his peter so close to my grimace. I think I sucked on his finger a little, then he slide his tool in my waiting mouth, and I loved it. This is all a blur because it was so pleasurable. I wanted him to f @ # $ my backtalk. It was amazing. I loved him being above me and putting his cock in my mouth.

'' I loved touching him to constitute him cum. It was so sexual ! I loved seeing his face while I was pleasuring him. The stature of pleasance was when he first touched me. I made him hold off quite awhile and work up up to it. He kept touching my second joint, my inner second joint, and my ass and getting so close to my flush. I kept moving his mitt and pushing him away. I love resisting a man 's advance and making him try for it and overcome me. It is so arousing to me. I think I was getting very vocal. ``

Another aside here : Madison moaned so loudly that I was afraid a guest in an adjacent room would name security. I whispered in her ear to lull down, and was surprised at the beautiful agony she expended keeping her moans suppressed. Her passion was so obvious and earnest. Pure ecstasy in action. goose egg faked or put on.

The journal then chronicled, `` He kept getting so close to touching me and I kept moving his hand. Finally he pulled me on top of him. My leg were broadcast apart on either side of him. He put his hands on my ass and pulled my ass wide apart. I was squirming I 'm certainly. He got really shut down and then finally plunged a finger into my efflorescence. I felt like screaming. So a great deal pleasance ! And I ca n't even get to say how much I loved him touching my ass. Some men do n't enjoy that, and I am so glad that he does. He ran his finger around my ass almost like he was rimming me but with his digit instead of his tongue. Then he laid me down with my back on the bed and started playing more with my peak. He groaned and said how estimable I felt. I felt his digit wandering around my lips. I wish he could throw looked at my efflorescence in the lamp Inner Light. It is so sexy. I wonder if he liked my lip, although I am not sure if he got much of a good smell at them. My plump, juicy bloom lips are my pet erotic feature on myself. I wish I had not been on my time period. I wanted him to suck on my lip so badly. Finally he sat up and touched me to perfection. He put a finger ( or maybe two ? I 'm not certainly. ) in my bloom and he put a finger's breadth in my ass, deep in my ass. He pushed me to the bound of go. My dearie affair of all is being fingered in the ass and prime at the same time. I love it. I did n't want it to end, although he was being a short too rough since I had n't been touched for several months. One of the most enjoyable moments was when I slowly pulled his finger out of my ass. That felt unbelievable. Feeling it slowly slide out of my ass. I wish I had been on my hands and knees for him to finger my ass. But it felt amazing as it was. I think I came, although the climax was n't very vivid. I wish I had not started my period, so I could experience relaxed and enjoyed it completely.

'' I just loved the way he was sexually. A little dominant. The gross amount of money. Admiring and romantic and not crass at all. Sexy and so sexual. Oh and I wished I could feature brought him to orgasm orally. I deep throated him a little and loved it. I wonder if he liked it much. He was n't very vocal, so I could n't enjoin which matter he especially liked. I wanted to clobber his balls, but I did n't. Perhaps I should have.

'' We held and cuddled afterwards. I loved it. And I loved that he kissed so many part of my dead body : my stomach, munition, neck. I wanted him to buss, lick, and snow on my right ear more. The whole night was scrumptious. The way he looked at me made me feel so feminine. If I had known this was going to happen I would have worn pretty underwear and shaved my legs and trimmed my hair. I hope he liked my flower. I felt sot from pleasure.

'' But I want so much more. I want to deep pharynx him more. I want him to try me. I want the soma up to make even longer. I want him to hold me to a greater extent. If I see him again, it is not going to be any easier for him. I want to resist just as much and pee him try for me. He has to overpower me to get to my white meat and bloom. I just sleep with the interplay of the masculine and the feminine, and he is so good at evoking the opinion of contrast between man and woman. That is what romance is. I want his strong workforce to lie me down on the bed and slowly circulate my legs apart and then razz me. Run his fingertips around the outline of my underwear. Breathe warm hint on my efflorescence through my underwear. rip my underwear to the side and gaze upon my blossom. tracing around my prime with his fingertip but take so long to touch it to labour me wild from desire. I want prolonged teasing.

'' The starting time time he saw my breasts, I felt so womanly. I want to experience what he was thinking at each part. I want to know what he thought when his dick was in my pharynx. He told me what he thought of my titty : that Grecians must have used a model like me in sculpting their statues. He is so romantic and so masculine. I love it. I want to know if he really saw my ass. It is so sexy and entire and round. I want to know how much he wanted to kiss me at dinner. I want to know what he thought when he first laid oculus on me. I want to make out what he thought when he caught a coup d'oeil of my cleavage. I want to lie with what he thought of my sonant skin. I want to jazz all his thoughts about everything in the eve. I want to know every dimension of his desire for me. I want him to see the fullness of my ass and pelvis, to look up to me more in all my alluring femininity.

'' There is so much more. I feel like I am just scratching the control surface. I ca n't help but marvel if he has many experiences like this in his business sector travels. Maybe I am but one of many buff he encounters often in his travels. Ah well. One can never get laid. He is well-favoured, classy, and romanticistic, so I would not be surprised if many cleaning lady fell for him and want him.

'' Oh well. I want him, and had him, tonight. ``

And Madison did have me that dark ... and in my memory, many Thomas More night after that.

While it might seem strange, we never had sexual congress. She was saving herself for her husband, whomever that golden man would turn out to be. And honestly, I did n't miss it for a import. It was the most sincere and titillating encounter I 've ever had. It just proves that it 's not what you do, but whom you do it with, that matters most.

James Madison and I would see each other two more times before she graduated and began traveling abroad. The following fourth dimension were more vivid and physical, involving draw of oral sex, deep throating, 69ing, and anal retentive experimentation. After one particularly exhausting round of climaxes, she snuggled against me and fell asleep with her psyche on my chest. While I was n't catching her from a slip on the ice, I was providing a soft and safe landing for this singular and sexy Pres Young woman.

During the last two encounters, she liked me being the polite aggressor, and there would be no motion as to whether she orgasmed. I always knew when I 'd succeeded because she 'd literally know quakes through her toned quad that would quiver and spasm for minutes afterwards. I 'd apply the one-in-ass-two-in-the-pussy proficiency multiple times, and often while sucking her sizable labia. And that ass ; oh my gosh. A perfect tuck ping penny-sized asshole that begged to be rimmed, licked and penetrated. Every part of capital of Wisconsin was just so blame fetching.

A voice of me fell in love with this young charwoman, but my inscription to my family prevented me from acting on any of the fancy I created, including paying for Madison 's post-graduate work in my home city so I could see her Thomas More often.

As it became clear that we would not likely see each other again, our e-mails became more infrequent. Every so often I 'd get a missive like, `` I want your clapper so badly. Your natural language is incredible. Magical. I want you to make my thigh shiver. I want to be really f # @ % ed in the ass too. earn me scream ! '' My all-time favorite was, `` You have no estimate how barbarian I am feeling ! I want you to dishonor my body right now ! I would lick your ass for an hour right now if we were together. I think the more dominant you are, the more inclined I would be to want to bat ass ... hold me down, put your pecker down my throat, maybe even tie me up a bit. I want you dreadfully ! ``

James Madison ended up settling permanently in Eastern Europe. She teaches there now. As often as I fantasized about seeing her again and trying to imagine a future with her, there was none that I could constitute a reality. We both needed to travel on. We had no future that I could take a crap real. I let go.

It 's been a few geezerhood since I received an e-mail from Madison. Perhaps thinking about her own need for redemption, that finale email was sent on Easter.

The tone included one of the kindest things anyone has ever written to me. She knew that I struggled with why she was attracted to me. I kept asking myself, `` Why me ? '' My thoughts were that perhaps I was some kind of loving paternal figure ? Rather forcefully, she corrected me, `` I was not attracted to because you were older. I was attracted to you, and you happened to be older. That 's all. ``

As I read that, the jam in my heart shrank a little, and my penury to run to the tail lessened for a time.

Sometime my mind curiosity if we 'll ever bilk course again. Will the desires that first drove us into the tincture ever bring us back together, even years from now ? To this day, whenever I make a connector through the Atlanta airport - Madison 's home townspeople - I catch myself thought of her.

writer 's note : I welcome notes from women about this story, either publicly or via the line option. Chicago440 on the three-lettered chat system of rules that begins and ends with the `` k '' sound and has an eye in the middle .