For as foresighted as I can remember, I have always wanted to be a better variant of myself. A champion to someone, but every time I see danger or trouble, I end up ... freezing. I guess the hero lifetime is just not for me ... I never introduced myself though did I journal ? You 're new, I 'm new to you and here I am already throwing material at you like this, I 'm regretful. My gens is Leon, Leon Howard Carter. I 'm 14 and I 'm a highschool entrant. I love plot, comics, dancing, chocolate and I 'm a BIG, BIG Superhero fan, namely ... Superman.

I know, I know ... one would say that a guy my age is should be more into Batman, or really should n't be into animated cartoon heroes at all ... but I just love it. The floor, the Super family, and the new Superboy Jonathan ? So lovely ! Not many people like it, and I get it, but I guess ... to each one their own I guess ...

But this entranceway tonight is not for me to talk about Superman, but about ... well ... who I am.

Sorry about how I unevenly write, I 'm just not used to it, but here we go !

I ... am adopted, I do n't remember when or how I got here but the dud just dropped one day for me. My parents called me down and tell apart me one day. I 'd say I took it kinda well, I did n't cry or anything, do n't even call up I felt anything actually ... I got dead and just ... kept on living. Maybe it 's due to the fact that my parents have it away me so much and that I do n't screw anything other than them as my parents, but I did n't find anything negative towards them ... anyway, I go to school, I have a best friend and lots of friends that take care of me because they say I 'm adorable. I guess that 's cool down actually, that everyone likes me this much. I just do n't get what I have that 's so impressive.

One thing about me that I find ... well, weird is ... well ... I do n't even bonk why I 'm writing it as if I 'm talking but whatever ...

I do n't experience confortable in relationships.

I love how my friends like me and worry about me, I love my parents, but the mere thought of having someone actually get it on me to the percentage point of wanting to be WITH me gets me ... uneasy. I 've had two girlfriends before, sooo let 's talk about that.

My first girlfriend 's name was Eva. She was Henry Sweet, she was beautiful ... had these amber eyes and dark hair ... She would always puzzle around me, said she 's protect me and my smile, and I said I 'd do the same for her ... turns out ... other people feeling the Sami as you can cause lots of hassle. The fact that my Quaker all like me just as much made her look ... unsung ... and I ca n't blame her. We broke up in 3 months.

My second lady friend was called Lola, and she was awesome. goon girlfriend, foresighted black hairsbreadth and blue optic I 'd easily get lost in. She was really, really tough ... closest to a real biography heroine I could fulfill. One day, we were coming out of the movies when we were jumped by this guy with a knife ready to rob us. As I said, I froze, I could n't do anything ( And regret it to this day ) but her ? She flipped the guy over herself as if he was made of report, dunno if it was impact or fear but he simply got up and ran away from us. I 'm grateful to her ever since this day. We really hit it off as a couple. Similar gustation, music and games ... but ... well ... she 's an ex for a reason right ?

She told me something, something that scared me a lot ... she said `` I love you ''. And I could n't ... say it back to her. And after 3 years ... we talked it out and broke up ... I just ... could n't ...

Ok, I just gave myself some face slap and I 'm prepare to talk about the adjacent someone ... the one I let loose all the clip. Ian Anderson.

I 've known Ian ever since we were small. We always had fun together ... he is so genteel and happy and there 's something about the way he winks that just says `` Do n't worry, I got it ''. He is my age and we are in the same social class, we like the same stuff and he 's really brave ... bravest guy I 've ever known. He is my one true up Hero of Alexandria, and I ca n't assist but notice that ... everytime he winks at me, reassuring me that everything is going to be ok ... my heart skips a musical rhythm. I get nervous, I get happy and kinda disappointed that I get to find this way and have no melodic theme what to do with this intuitive feeling ...

Ian is my outflank friend, always was. I feel ... Weird when I 'm around him. I 'm always felicitous with him. I 'm laughing writing this because ... there was this meter he got here, my parents were out and we played games all day, danced around like a lot of kids, sang together and even had pizza for dinner. It was one of the well-chosen days of my life. So chill, so near ... he always reassured me that he was having a lot of fun with me, and I could say the same to him. He was the reason I even changed my style !

I used to have a messy black fuzz, one day, he just went `` Hey, ever thought of like ... dyeing your hair ? Blond or something ''. I remember it vividly ... he ... ran his fingers on my whisker on the area that should be blond and said `` Maybe let down it on the sides a bit ? ''. I laughed at that, it was so ... sweet. I would never look as cool as Ian though. His hair is spiky John Brown, his eyes are the most beautiful shades of green ... dissimilar dark glasses. Yeah, you heard me.. uhh .... read it. He has heterochromia and it 's the nerveless matter ever !

Which brings me to the ... rationality I 'm writing this down ... I 've been feeling unlike about him ... not the skipping a jiffy ... more like ... I want to be so often penny-pinching to him, not seeing him injury ... and my supporter seem to notice that I 'm anxious when he is not around. They poke fun, good natured of class, but I was thinking ... maybe ... I 'm not the only one feeling like that ... what if I really am not ? What if he feels the same way ? Oh God what if he does n't ? Why am I so ... looney about it ? Am I going crazy ?

Is it ... just me ?

Maybe I 'll invite him over tomorrow ... try to talk about it ... I 'll be home alone, great opportunity. What could go wrong ?