My name is Keven Bardot and, yes, I am a Sissy ! When I was a teenage I put on my mom 's panty and some of her lipstick when she was out. I had longish blond tomentum and I ruffled it up - kind of teased it up - and when I looked in her dresser mirror, I almost ejaculated. Because what I saw looking back at me was not a skinny alibi for a male. What I saw was an extremely sexy looking girlie-girl - and it was me ! I went to mom 's wardrobe and picked out a pair of her gamey heel, stepped into them, and walked to the to the full length mirror in the hallway. When I saw myself in the wide-cut duration - a fair sex with a hard on - then I did cum. I was immediately ashamed, and could n't pass over the red lipstick off my oral fissure fast enough.

That was the foremost time I stepped over the line. But definitely not the hold up. I had always been hypersexual ; I used to get a hard on thinking about this one girl in my class. I imagined her naked and I was chasing her and whipping her. I should note that I was not like near of the guys of my age, in that I was very much a born sissy. I loathed any variety of acrobatic sports, for object lesson, and I was afraid of my match because I had no really physical long suit, was uncoordinated, and could not fight back. I was shiny enough, however, to understand that being a Milquetoast in the earthly concern in which I found myself, was completely unacceptable. I had a real sentience of ignominy and embarrassment. So I went to great length to manipulate it ; I did n't play with girls, for case, and I avoided post that would put myself in the spotlight.

Being a weakling, I learned to be a thoroughly manipulator. I managed to constitute it through my youth by keeping a low visibility. So when I began masturbating several fourth dimension a day, I figured I was normal enough. After all, I was extremely attracted by the pile of the naked woman in the sex cartridge that I used as a optical aid, so I assumed that I must be normal.

I had heard about poof. Everybody I knew detest queers. The last thing anyone in my rophy wanted was to be thought of as a faggot ! There were queers in San Francisco, some of whom dressed and behaved like womanhood. I was told that the queers had bars and nightspot where they hung out. These were revolting people to the mass I knew.. So when I found myself in strawman of that full length mirror, wearing my mother 's high cad, scanty and lipstick, I was revolted with myself.

It was around that sentence that my cousin and I were taking a shortcut through the forest. As we rounded a bend in the path we came upon a guy of around our own age, sitting on a large boulder, completely naked. We walked on in dazed silence until we heard him call out : `` Do you want a blowjob ? ''

I was enraged. This was an affront to my maleness. I told my first cousin that we should go back and give this houri a beating. We ran back to the boulder but the nymph had disappeared. My cousin-german and I resumed our journey, speaking in tones of indignation as to what we would do if we ever saw that `` faggot '' again.

A few twenty-four hours later I went back to the Boulder by myself, hoping to get the nymph - not to circumvent him - but to join him. To do what, I did n't recognise. Perhaps just to frolic naked with him, feeling the warm bounce pushover on our beautiful Young bodies, or maybe to sit naked and provocative next to him, both of us soliciting real men as they passed by. I went back several times, hoping to see him, but I never saw him again.

My relationship with the opposite sex had always been strained. Now that I was full of sexual desire, I imagined various girls of my conversancy, naked with me. In realism these same girls left me tongue tied and red from superfluity. Many hombre of my age had matured to where they had begun to look and act like actual men. I was modest and skinny and had no consistence hair to utter of former than a few sparse, very light-haired hair on my pubis. When I entered the navy at the age of 18, I still could accept easily passed as much untried.

I had sex with another someone for the for the first time time when I was 18. I was in the navy and stationed in California. I still had absolutely no confidence around girls, but I was always turned on. I do n't know why I did it, but a few days after arriving at the base, I went walking through the sweltering hot city late at Nox. I did n't know then that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', a homophile term for looking for sex.

It was a very hot night and I was wearing a armoured combat vehicle top and some really short skimpie crosscut, and my black navy blue issuing dress place with black wind sleeve that really accentuated my hairless, skinny, feminine looking white legs ! After about an hour I spotted a car that I had seen earlier. God - I was so fucking HORNY ! I kept putting my hand in my pocket and pressing down on my erection.

I knew that the driver was hawking me. I knew that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', and I knew, oh so well, that was what what queers do - and I did n't care. I was so horny I just did n't care ! The car came by again and this sentence pulled over. The driver had his window down. My nitty-gritty was pounding and I was really aflutter. Now I knew that this clip I was the houri, out for seduction. The driver leaned over. `` You need a rhytidoplasty ? '' he asked. He was Latino, about 40, with a shaved head and a goatee.

I walked over to the passenger window. `` I do n't know '', I said. `` I 'm just hangin'out. ``

'' cum on, get in '', he said, reaching over and opening the threshold. I was really neural - scared - but something inside me told me I had to. I got in the car and closed the door. He drove off immediately, giving me these intense spirit. He pressed the whorl clit and I heard my door lock. Now I could n't get out even if I wanted to ! I stared consecutive ahead. Then he put his hand on my bare leg. I stiffened, but said nix. His hand began feeling my bare peg and I could find myself getting hard. `` Ju got ta silky stage, puto '', he said. `` Like a woman ! '' I blushed, embarrassed. I did n't know what `` puto '' meant.

'' Thank you '', I said, still staring straight ahead. He pulled over near a school.

'' Let 's go for a walk '', he said. We walked to the building and he led me to some outside concrete steps that descended to a cellar doorway. We went halfway down the stairs, until we were out of sight. It was a hot nighttime, darkness and very secret. He stripped off his wifebeater and pulled off his jeans and undershorts, until he was naked in just his sock and study boots. He was really muscley, big sleeve with gobs of big, knockout muscles, shave promontory, goatee, and had a lot of tattoos on his munition and torso. He was so - fuckin - CUTE !

I quickly stripped to just my frock shoe. As soon as I was naked he took me and pulled me close to his body, leaning down and kissing me deeply, his big script were cupping my hind end. He was really hot. He began kissing my lips, cheek, spike and neck, calling me, `` juera, puto, '' and `` linda. '' He put his hands on my berm and pushed me down on my genu. `` Chupar mi pollo, marica ! '' He choked, gripping his surd dick. `` Suck me. '' I had my first kiss, and now I was about to devote my first-class honours degree blowjob.

I had seen videos before of women sucking men off. I bent my head and took the read/write head of his dick into my lip and began sucking him off. He was moaning and ran his thick fingers through my mop of thick blonde hairsbreadth, entwining my hair in his fingers to control the drive of my bobbing skull. I ran my hands all over his big hairy legs. Suddenly he tensed and I felt my throat being flooded with warm up semen. I swallowed it and he relaxed back on the steps, his chest panting. I remained crouched between his legs, resting my fount against his second joint. I looked up at him. `` Didja like it ? '' I asked him, savoring the unfamiliar gustatory sensation of semen in my mouth.

'' Oh that was so effective, `` juera '', he said. `` Where you learn to suck in cock like that ? '' I blushed and put my headland down. I felt so ... rightfield, my cheek on his thigh, inhaling the smell of his bare soma.

We had a cigaret and then put our dress back on. The Latino - he told me his name was Abel - drove me to the bus post. It was 1 a.m. The hold out bus going to the root left a 1:15. Niels Abel sat with me as I waited. He told me that he wanted to see me again. `` I want to bed you next metre, Blondie '', he whispered. I looked at him. I was so naïve.

'' piece of ass me ? But where ? I do n't have a cunt ? ''

'' I fuck you from behind - that is your chocha - your slit. ''

I rode back to the base, my head reeling from what had just happened. Now I was having second thoughts. I began to feel really angry - with myself - and with Niels Abel. I began to transport my anger to him, blaming him for what had happened at the school, as if he had reped me. After a few solar day I made Quaker with some of my fellow straw hat and tried to put what happened with Abel behind me.

I was ferocious with myself on the bus ride back to base - and for several sidereal day afterward. Furious that I had let myself slip and acted like - like - I dont live ! Like some fag ? I swore that it would never happen again, and I hated Niels Abel for what he had done to me. I felt like killing him.

But guess what ? Two weeks later, I was laying in my bunk with a intemperately on. it was a really hot, sweltering afternoon, and I began feeling looney horny ! I teased up my pilus and put on my short-shorts and black apparel horseshoe with sinister socks rolled down around my articulatio talocruralis, and a lean blackness heftiness shirt - which I had no business organization wearing as I had nothing resembling a muscular tissue on my body ! I looked in the mirror. God, I looked like a add up faggot ! A complete pansy ! But my judgment was sex crazed by that point and I just did n't give a fuck ! It was 3 pm on Friday, and I did n't have to be back on duty until Mon. I ran to the bus diaphragm and caught the first gear bus to township.

On the ride to downtown all I could think about was getting some hard cock ! It was still early when I got to townsfolk. I went straight from the bus station to a really dirty section of the urban center. I spotted an old hotel and went to the desk and got a room. The clerk was an elderly bald headed mexican guy. He kept looking at me and licking his rim. I pulled out a coral pink lipstick and applied some to my pouty lip, acting really aphrodisiacal and putting on a show for him. I mean, I was n't gon na fuck him or anything - he was old and ugly - but it turned me on to be intimate that he wanted me. He gave me the key and I went to my room. It was a reasonably courteous room for a wasteyard. There were no windows, but I did n't deal about that anyway. And there was air conditioning ! I decided to go out and cruise, hoping to find Niels Abel - or some early bumpy man - it made no difference to me. I went out, wearing nothing but the stooge baring dungaree cutoffs - no shirt, no shoes - just the dead trunks ! I felt so SEXY - and LIBERATED !

I had been thinking about Niels Henrik Abel a lot lately. By the time I hit the street it was 7 pm. It was still light out, but the shadows were growing longer. I walked on a main drag, every so often cutting down the English streets and coming back out on the principal retarding force again. I knew I looked sexy and Andrew D. White trashy, barefoot with only my tiny short-shorts and the garden pink lip rouge ! I wore the pink lipstick because it was noticable but not too obvious. Because looking the way I was looking, the attention I was gon na get was either from some horny hombre, OR - from gay bashers !

Then I spotted his pick-me-up ! It was Abel ! My heart was pounding. I pretended not to see him, but I began walking a little more sexier, wiggling my coxa a little more, behaving a lot More feminine ! He pulled up next to me and I turned. I gave him a footling smile, but continued walking. This time it was dissimilar. This time I was feeling much more confident, and I knew how much he wanted me. I wanted him just as badly but I did n't desire to act over eager. I wanted him to chase me a little.

'' Keven, I wan na public lecture to you ! '' he said.I kept walk, but looked over my berm, giving him a sexy look.

'' What ? '' I said.

. `` Keven, come on, sister, '' he said. Just get in the hand truck so we can lecture - ok ? '' I smiled but kept walk, making sure as shooting to put some wriggle in my ass. Suddenly he accelerated and pulled up in front of me, blocking my path. He jumped out of the car and ran up on me, taking my arm firmly in his big hand. I tried to take out away but his grip was like branding iron. He bitch walked me back to the truck and put me inside. I knew better than to try and run - it would just really peeing him off and - well - who knows what he would do ?

He drove off and I folded my arms and sulked. He reached over and pinched my jaws in his hand, so tight that it hurt. `` Do n't pout, Juera, he said harshly. `` What the fuck is the topic with you, Keven ? ''

I shook my head. `` Nothin''' I answered.

`` It 's just that ... well I 've been lookin for you all Nox ! `` Jose pulled over and pulled me conclusion and kissed me deeply. Oh GOD ! Now I just KNEW I was in sexual love ! `` Honey, I got a motel room, '' I blurted out. `` We can go there, if you want. I do n't cause to be back until Monday. ''

When we got to the motel, I could n't aid but see the desk shop clerk staring. I started talking loud and laughing, because I wanted him to see what a bountiful MAN I had. As soon as we got in the room I let my shorts fall to the dry land and stood there naked.. Abel had stripped off too, and was standing in the dimly lit room, his bull like physical structure, muscley and sweaty. I came up to him and ran my fruity little hands all over his gorgeous body, and then I licked and kissed his caramel brown chest. His inviolable hands cupped my bare cheek and we kissed. Then he picked me up and carried me completely naked to the bed.

We were lying side by position, kissing and making out. Abel 's tool was rock hard. So was my little dick. As we made love, I kept squeezing my man 's heavy penis, choking it down near the base. I got down between his big meaty legs and began sucking his cock and balls. He raised his legs, exposing his very hairy anus. `` Kiss it, puto, '' he said. My grimace was mightily future to his ass hole. I sniffed it and began to eat him out ! He groaned in delight as I hungrily nibbled and tongued out his rectum. Suddenly he lowered his peg and pulled me to him.

'' What is it, honey ? '' I asked him. `` Do n't you like it ? ''

'' I love it, marica, but I want to fuck you now. '' He took a small tub of vaseline from the bedside table. `` Here - filth up my cock, bitch. '' I did like he said. Then we began making out some more than, and the more we did the more horny we both got. Niels Abel got on top of me and was passionately kissing on my ear and neck and teat. I began sobbing. `` What 's untimely ? '' he whispered.

'' Oh, honey, '' I sobbed. `` Am I like a charwoman ? ''

'' You 're ALL cleaning woman, baby, '' he told me.

'' No - but am I YOU 'RE woman ? '' I asked.

'' You are about to be, '' he said, raising my leg up over his tolerant shoulders. I could feel the stiffness of his raw meat poking near my rectum. I got scared.

'' beloved, is it gon na hurt ? Please do n't hurt me, honey, '' I begged.

'' Gon na hurt trade good, baby, '' he growled, his rough sandpaper jaw nuzzling my soft cervix.

'' steady, I do n't think I 'm prepare yet - I do n't remember we shou -- '' My row were choked of by a searing pain in my anus as the big mushroom-shaped cloud pass of his rigid cock ripped into me. I screamed in infliction and tried to get out from under him, but I was totally helpless - that 's how inviolable he was. I thought I was gon na extend out the pain was so bad, and then it began to lessen as the head word slid in deeper and deeper, until I felt his pubis bump up against mine. He was in, balls deep. My cherry had been popped ! 'This is what it feels like to be a woman !'I thought.

Abel began fucking me with long, decelerate strokes. I began moving my hips in sentence with his round. He was kissin all over me and I was babbling all variety of filth - every vulgar, foul sexual mentation spewed from my backtalk, like diarreah. I could feel his strong arms around me so close I thought he would crack my rib - and I did n't give a fuck ! THIS is what I had been born to be - womanhood - a whore !

Now we were two naked human existence, together as one, the headboard of our conjugation bed was pounding against the bulwark and I was whining and yelling in complete intimate JOY, my underweight white branch wrapped around my mister 's bull like neck opening. Finally, Niels Abel 's full torso tensed and he shouted out in pleasance as he emptied his load deep into my gut. Slowly he relaxed and soon lay over me.

We spent the relief of the weekend in bed. It was like a honeymoon. I was SO in love ! When Niels Abel dropped me off at the bus station on Monday dawn, we kissed and he promised to see me again next weekend. But I never saw him again. I know he was married, and that he 'd been in and out of prison, but that was it for us. I cried for weeks, but eventually I got over him. I hated myself for being imperfect - for being a faggot - and I swore that, from now on I was going completely straight !