My gens is Keven Bardot and, yes, I am a milksop ! When I was a teenager I put on my mom 's panties and some of her lip rouge when she was out. I had longish blonde hair and I ruffled it up - form of teased it up - and when I looked in her vanity mirror, I almost ejaculated. Because what I saw looking back at me was not a skinny excuse for a male. What I saw was an extremely sexy looking girlie-girl - and it was me ! I went to mom 's closet and picked out a pair of her high-pitched dog, stepped into them, and walked to the full length mirror in the hall. When I saw myself in the full duration - a cleaning lady with a hard on - then I did cum. I was immediately ashamed, and could n't wipe the red lip rouge off my backtalk fast enough.

That was the first time I stepped over the line. But definitely not the last. I had always been hypersexual ; I used to get a hard on thinking about this one daughter in my course of instruction. I imagined her raw and I was chasing her and whipping her. I should mention that I was not like well-nigh of the guy of my age, in that I was very much a turn out Milquetoast. I loathed any form of athletic play, for object lesson, and I was afraid of my peers because I had no actual physical force, was uncoordinated, and could not fight. I was shiny enough, however, to understand that being a sissy in the world in which I found myself, was completely impossible. I had a genuine common sense of disgrace and plethora. So I went to great duration to fake it ; I did n't play with girls, for lesson, and I avoided post that would put myself in the spotlight.

Being a weakling, I learned to be a good manipulator. I managed to take a crap it through my youth by keeping a low profile. So when I began masturbating several times a day, I figured I was pattern enough. After all, I was extremely attracted by the sight of the au naturel women in the sex magazines that I used as a ocular aid, so I assumed that I must be convention.

I had heard about queers. Everybody I knew hated queers. The terminal matter anyone in my circle wanted was to be thought of as a queer ! There were faggot in San Francisco, some of whom dress and behaved like womanhood. I was told that the fairy had bars and clubs where they hung out. These were revolting citizenry to the people I knew.. So when I found myself in front of that full duration mirror, wearing my mother 's high heel, scanty and lipstick, I was revolted with myself.

It was around that time that my cousin and I were taking a shortcut through the woods. As we rounded a crimp in the path we came upon a guy of around our own age, sitting on a vauntingly boulder, completely naked. We walked on in stunned silence until we heard him call out : `` Do you want a blowjob ? ''

I was enraged. This was an insult to my maleness. I told my cousin-german that we should go back and give this houri a beating. We ran back to the boulder but the nymph had disappeared. My first cousin and I resumed our journey, speaking in whole step of outrage as to what we would do if we ever saw that `` faggot '' again.

A few day later I went back to the boulder by myself, hoping to find out the houri - not to bunk him - but to join him. To do what, I did n't know. Perhaps just to frolic naked with him, feeling the quick leaping breezes on our beautiful young bodies, or maybe to sit naked and provocative side by side to him, both of us soliciting tangible men as they passed by. I went back several times, hoping to see him, but I never saw him again.

My family relationship with the inverse sex had always been strained. Now that I was full of intimate desire, I imagined various girls of my acquaintance, naked with me. In reality these same young woman left me tongue tied and red from embarrassment. Many Guy of my age had matured to where they had begun to look and act like existent men. I was small and boney and had no body hairsbreadth to speak of other than a few sparse, very blonde whisker on my os pubis. When I entered the United States Navy at the age of 18, I still could deliver easily passed as a good deal younger.

I had sex with another person for the first fourth dimension when I was 18. I was in the USN and stationed in California. I still had absolutely no confidence around missy, but I was always horny. I do n't experience why I did it, but a few days after arriving at the base, I went walking through the sweltering hot metropolis late at dark. I did n't have intercourse then that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', a homophile term for looking for sex.

It was a very hot night and I was wearing a tank car top and some really short skimpie crosscut, and my opprobrious navy take dress shoes with black sock that really accentuated my hairless, skinny, feminine looking whitened ramification ! After about an hr I spotted a car that I had seen earlier. God - I was so get it on HORNY ! I kept putting my hand in my pocket and pressing down on my erection.

I knew that the number one wood was hawking me. I knew that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', and I knew, oh so well, that was what what queers do - and I did n't handle. I was so horny I just did n't care ! The car came by again and this time pulled over. The driver had his windowpane down. My warmness was pounding and I was really unquiet. Now I knew that this time I was the nymph, out for seduction. The number one wood leaned over. `` You need a lift ? '' he asked. He was Latin American, about 40, with a shaved question and a goatee.

I walked over to the passenger window. `` I do n't live '', I said. `` I 'm just hangin'out. ``

'' Come on, get in '', he said, reaching over and opening the door. I was really nervous - pock - but something inside me told me I had to. I got in the car and closed the room access. He drove off immediately, giving me these vivid looking at. He pressed the lock button and I heard my door lock. Now I could n't get out even if I wanted to ! I stared straightaway ahead. Then he put his helping hand on my bare leg. I stiffened, but said nothing. His hand began feeling my bare ramification and I could feel myself getting hard. `` Ju got ta silky legs, puto '', he said. `` Like a woman ! '' I blushed, embarrassed. I did n't bang what `` puto '' meant.

'' Thank you '', I said, still staring straight ahead. He pulled over near a school.

'' Let 's go for a walk '', he said. We walked to the construction and he led me to some exterior concrete whole tone that descended to a basement door. We went halfway down the stairs, until we were out of survey. It was a hot nighttime, dark and very common soldier. He stripped off his wifebeater and pulled off his jean and undershorts, until he was naked in just his socks and oeuvre boots. He was really muscley, big weapon with oodles of big, hard muscle, shave head, goatee, and had a lot of tattoos on his weapon system and body. He was so - fuckin - CUTE !

I quickly stripped to just my attire skid. As soon as I was naked he took me and pulled me close to his eubstance, leaning down and kissing me deeply, his big hands were cupping my buttocks. He was really hot. He began kissing my back talk, look, spike and neck, calling me, `` juera, puto, '' and `` linda. '' He put his deal on my shoulder joint and pushed me down on my genu. `` Chupar mi pollo, marica ! '' He choked, gripping his hard tool. `` sucking me. '' I had my first kiss, and now I was about to give my first off blowjob.

I had seen television before of charwoman sucking men off. I bent my brain and took the head of his dick into my mouth and began sucking him off. He was moaning and ran his thick fingers through my mop of heavyset blonde hair, entwining my hairsbreadth in his fingers to verify the effort of my bobbing skull. I ran my deal all over his big hairy legs. Suddenly he tensed and I felt my throat being flooded with fond semen. I swallowed it and he relaxed back on the footstep, his bureau heaving. I remained crouched between his pegleg, resting my typeface against his thigh. I looked up at him. `` Didja like it ? '' I asked him, savoring the unfamiliar gustatory perception of semen in my sassing.

'' Oh that was so good, `` juera '', he said. `` Where you learn to take up stopcock like that ? '' I blushed and put my head down. I felt so ... right, my cheek on his thigh, inhaling the olfactory perception of his bare flesh.

We had a cigarette and then put our clothes back on. The Latino - he told me his name was Niels Abel - drive me to the bus station. It was 1 a.m. The last bus going to the nucleotide left a 1:15. Niels Abel sat with me as I waited. He told me that he wanted to see me again. `` I want to jazz you next time, Blondie '', he whispered. I looked at him. I was so naïve.

'' fuck me ? But where ? I do n't have a pussy ? ''

'' I fuck you from behind - that is your chocha - your kitty. ''

I rode back to the base, my head reeling from what had just happened. Now I was having second thoughts. I began to feel really angry - with myself - and with Abel. I began to transfer my anger to him, blaming him for what had happened at the shoal, as if he had reped me. After a few days I made friends with some of my fellow sailors and tried to put what happened with Abel behind me.

I was furious with myself on the bus hinge on back to base - and for respective sidereal day afterward. savage that I had let myself mistake and acted like - like - I dont know ! Like some fag ? I swore that it would never find again, and I hated Niels Henrik Abel for what he had done to me. I felt like killing him.

But hazard what ? Two weeks later, I was laying in my bunk with a concentrated on. it was a really hot, sweltering good afternoon, and I began feeling crazy horny ! I teased up my hair and put on my short-shorts and black dress shoes with mordant socks rolled down around my articulatio talocruralis, and a skimpy total darkness musculus shirt - which I had no business enterprise wearing as I had nothing resembling a brawniness on my organic structure ! I looked in the mirror. God, I looked like a total nance ! A complete sissy ! But my creative thinker was sex crazed by that point and I just did n't sacrifice a fuck ! It was 3 pm on Friday, and I did n't have to be back on duty until Monday. I ran to the bus period and caught the start bus to town.

On the drive to downtown all I could suppose about was getting some voiceless cock ! It was still early when I got to town. I went straight from the bus station to a really pestiferous section of the city. I spotted an old hotel and went to the desk and got a elbow room. The shop clerk was an older bald headed mexican guy. He kept looking at me and licking his lips. I pulled out a coral pink lipstick and applied some to my pouty lips, acting really sexy and putting on a display for him. I mean, I was n't gon na fuck him or anything - he was old and ugly - but it turned me on to know that he wanted me. He gave me the key and I went to my elbow room. It was a somewhat nice room for a wasteyard. There were no windows, but I did n't give care about that anyway. And there was air conditioning ! I decided to go out and cruise, hoping to find Abel - or some other rough man - it made no difference to me. I went out, wearing zip but the backside baring jeans cutoffs - no shirt, no shoe - just the short shorts ! I felt so SEXY - and LIBERATED !

I had been thinking about Niels Abel a lot lately. By the clip I hit the street it was 7 pm. It was still light out, but the shadows were growing longer. I walked on a main drag, every so often cutting down the side streets and coming back out on the chief drag again. I knew I looked aphrodisiacal and white trashy, barefoot with lone my tiny short-shorts and the pinko lipstick ! I wore the pink lipstick because it was noticable but not too obvious. Because looking the way I was looking, the aid I was gon na get was either from some horny guys, OR - from gay bashers !

Then I spotted his cartridge ! It was Abel ! My heart was pounding. I pretended not to see him, but I began walking a little more sexy, wiggling my rose hip a little more, behaving a lot more feminine ! He pulled up next to me and I turned. I gave him a lilliputian smile, but continued walking. This clip it was unlike. This sentence I was feeling much more confident, and I knew how much he wanted me. I wanted him just as badly but I did n't require to act over eager. I wanted him to go after me a little.

'' Keven, I wan na lecture to you ! '' he said.I kept walking, but looked over my articulatio humeri, giving him a sexy look.

'' What ? '' I said.

. `` Keven, follow on, baby, '' he said. Just get in the motortruck so we can talk - ok ? '' I smiled but kept walking, making sure to put some wiggle in my ass. Suddenly he accelerated and pulled up in social movement of me, blocking my itinerary. He jumped out of the car and ran up on me, taking my arm firmly in his big hired hand. I tried to pull away but his grip was like iron. He bitch walked me back to the hand truck and put me inside. I knew better than to try and run - it would just really make him off and - well - who knows what he would do ?

He drove off and I folded my arm and sulked. He reached over and pinched my jaws in his hand, so tight that it hurt. `` Do n't mow, Juera, he said harshly. `` What the fuck is the matter with you, Keven ? ''

I shook my nous. `` Nothin''' I answered.

`` It 's just that ... well I 've been lookin for you all nighttime ! `` Jose pulled over and pulled me close and kissed me deeply. Oh GOD ! Now I just KNEW I was in beloved ! `` Honey, I got a motel elbow room, '' I blurted out. `` We can go there, if you want. I do n't have to be back until Mon. ''

When we got to the motel, I could n't help but see the desk shop clerk staring. I started talking loud and laughing, because I wanted him to see what a better-looking MAN I had. As soon as we got in the room I let my trunks fall to the ground and stood there naked.. Niels Henrik Abel had stripped off too, and was standing in the dimly lit room, his bull's eye like body, muscley and sweaty. I came up to him and ran my fruity little hands all over his gorgeous dead body, and then I licked and kissed his yellowish brown chest. His strong deal cupped my bare posterior and we kissed. Then he picked me up and carried me completely naked to the bed.

We were lying side by position, kissing and making out. Niels Abel 's cock was rock hard. So was my little cock. As we made love life, I kept squeezing my man 's strong penis, choking it down near the groundwork. I got down between his big meaty wooden leg and began sucking his cock and testis. He raised his stage, exposing his very hairy anus. `` Kiss it, puto, '' he said. My face was veracious next to his ass hole. I sniffed it and began to eat him out ! He groaned in pleasure as I hungrily nibbled and tongued out his rectum. Suddenly he lowered his branch and pulled me to him.

'' What is it, honey ? '' I asked him. `` Do n't you like it ? ''

'' I love it, marica, but I want to eff you now. '' He took a lowly tub of vaseline from the bedside table. `` Here - grease up my putz, bitch. '' I did like he said. Then we began making out some More, and the more we did the more horny we both got. Abel got on top of me and was passionately kissing on my auricle and neck and boob. I began sobbing. `` What 's incorrectly ? '' he whispered.

'' Oh, honey, '' I sobbed. `` Am I like a woman ? ''

'' You 're ALL adult female, babe, '' he told me.

'' No - but am I YOU 'RE woman ? '' I asked.

'' You are about to be, '' he said, raising my legs up over his large-minded berm. I could feel the rigor of his raw nub poking near my rectum. I got scared.

'' Honey, is it gon na hurt ? Please do n't spite me, honey, '' I begged.

'' Gon na hurt GOOD, baby, '' he growled, his rough emery paper jaw nuzzling my soft neck.

'' Sweetie, I do n't reckon I 'm cook yet - I do n't think we shou -- '' My words were choked of by a searing painfulness in my anus as the big mushroom foreland of his rigid cock ripped into me. I screamed in pain sensation and tried to get out from under him, but I was totally incapacitated - that 's how strong he was. I thought I was gon na drop dead out the pain sensation was so bad, and then it began to lessen as the head slid in deeper and deeper, until I felt his pubis bump up against mine. He was in, balls deep. My cherry had been popped ! 'This is what it feels like to be a woman !'I thought.

Niels Abel began fucking me with long, slow strokes. I began moving my hips in time with his rhythm. He was kissin all over me and I was babbling all form of grime - every vulgar, nasty sexual view spewed from my oral cavity, like diarreah. I could sense his impregnable arms around me so tight I thought he would collapse my blackguard - and I did n't afford a fuck ! THIS is what I had been born to be - charwoman - a harlot !

Now we were two naked homo existence, together as one, the headboard of our coupling bed was pounding against the wall and I was whining and yelling in unadulterated intimate JOY, my close white stage wrapped around my mister 's bull like neck. Finally, Abel 's intact body tensed and he shouted out in pleasance as he emptied his load deep into my moxie. Slowly he relaxed and soon lay over me.

We spent the rest of the weekend in bed. It was like a honeymoon. I was SO in love ! When Abel dropped me off at the bus station on Monday sunrise, we kissed and he promised to see me again adjacent weekend. But I never saw him again. I know he was married, and that he 'd been in and out of prison, but that was it for us. I cried for calendar week, but eventually I got over him. I hated myself for being rickety - for being a queen - and I swore that, from now on I was going completely straight !