Chapter One

The day started as it usually did. Groggily, Jess leaned over to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock. He was so wear out because he had been doing xxx hours a week at work lately and he was n't sleeping well because of his home life. Add in school and the prep that came along with it and it was midnight or later by the time he got to bed."Who invented these things anyway ? ”, he thought as he climbed out of bed.

Showered and dressed, he went downstairs to get some breakfast."Hi Jess ”, his brother and baby said to him, almost in unison."Hi ”, he replied back. After eating breakfast, he went back upstairs to brush his teeth. Then he came downstairs again and went to see his mother. Jess always went to his mother 's way and said"good break of day"to her before leaving for school. Why he still did, he was n't sure. He had become so distant, there was no real connection left."Probably just out of habit ”, he told himself. He kissed his mother goodbye and then left with his brother for school.

In the car, he and his brother did n't talk much. It was n't that they did n't like each other, but Jess and Saint Luke had very little in common these twenty-four hour period. They had unlike friends, Luke being Thomas More of a social butterfly ; different tastes in euphony, Jess listened to more heavy metal and rock music, while St. Luke was more into the pop music tantrum ; etc ... Once they got to schooltime, that was it. The car ride there was the most clock time they spent with each other in a day and whichever one was n't driving that day just stared at their telephone the intact ride.

Everyday he dreaded going to school day. high up School had never been"as promote"to Jess. He was a loner, an castaway. He had not even a fistful of friends, everyone knew everyone, but that was about it. Recently he had been feeling Thomas More and more cast down, his persuasion sometimes turning to suicide. Home life was ... well it was n't a base anymore ...

"good morning Mr. Knight ”, said his homeroom teacher, Mr. Toer."first light ”, Jess replied back. He took his seat and started on the homework he did n't terminate live on night. math was a particularly hard subject for Jess. He was just one bad mark away from failing the discipline for the semester, but at this point that was the live on affair on his mind. Staring at the lacuna sheet of paper in straw man of him, his mind started to wander."What am I even doing here ? I have no purpose, no desire, no happiness. If I decided to just run away today, will anyone care ? will my parents notice if I 'm not there ?"The bell for the end of home room rang, jolting him back into consciousness."Damn it ”, he thought, realizing he had n't done a unity problem.

When the Alexander Graham Bell rang at 3:05, he was already driving away from school ( his brother was in ROTC and stayed for after-school bodily function ), his foot to the floor and the radio clamor. Music had become Jess'only reprieve from his biography and he was retreating into it more and more, barely paying attention to anything else. Music made him feel potent, made him find like he had a reason to live. It seemed that the lyric of the song on the radio spoke directly to him, lifting him up, making him sense happy that individual, somewhere understood what he felt.

When he got home, Jess went straight to his elbow room. As he was changing into his piece of work uniform, he took a aspect at himself in the mirror. He was 16, had long, dark chocolate-brown haircloth, galvanizing blue eyes, was about six infantry grandiloquent, and had slim body. The someone staring back at him looked so far away, it looked like him, but it was n't him. The center of the person in the mirror looked so scourge and empty it was shocking. Sighing to himself, he turned off the light and headed to work.

At work that Night, he just floated aimlessly through the evening, barely engaging the customers, just wanting the dark to end so that he could go home and sopor. Sleep, the one matter and one time of the day when he did n't sense hollow, lifeless. When did n't feel anything but serenity. The future day was Sabbatum and he did n't have to go to make or school so he could sleep all through the night and well into the morning.

Opening the door to his house after oeuvre, Jess got a halfhearted"Hi"from his parents. The form of"hi"that you say out of politeness, not because you actually meant it. He replied back, asked if anyone had made dinner that night, and then went to his room. Turning on his information processing system, he checked his e-mail. As usual, it was just a crew of spam, but then Jess saw the e-mail. Wesley had responded to him ! Jess read the e-mail, then shut off his reckoner and got into bed. Falling asleep, he smiled to himself, feeling some humble sense of hope.


Criticism welcome. Like I said, let me get it on if I should continue .