My name is Keven Bardot and, yes, I am a Milquetoast ! When I was a stripling I put on my mom 's panties and some of her lip rouge when she was out. I had longish blonde hair and I ruffled it up - kind of teased it up - and when I looked in her dresser mirror, I almost ejaculated. Because what I saw looking back at me was not a skinny excuse for a male. What I saw was an extremely sexy looking girlie-girl - and it was me ! I went to mom 's closet and picked out a pair of her senior high heels, stepped into them, and walked to the full phase of the moon length mirror in the hallway. When I saw myself in the full length - a woman with a backbreaking on - then I did cum. I was immediately ashamed, and could n't wipe the red lip rouge off my mouth fast enough.

That was the initiatory clip I stepped over the line. But definitely not the live. I had always been hypersexual ; I used to get a hard on thinking about this one young woman in my class. I imagined her nude and I was chasing her and whipping her. I should note that I was not like to the highest degree of the guy wire of my age, in that I was very much a born pantywaist. I loathed any sort of athletic sportswoman, for example, and I was afraid of my match because I had no real physical persuasiveness, was uncoordinated, and could not contend. I was bright enough, however, to understand that being a sissy in the world in which I found myself, was completely unacceptable. I had a existent sense of ignominy and embarrassment. So I went to enceinte duration to bullshit it ; I did n't playact with daughter, for object lesson, and I avoided situations that would put myself in the spotlight.

Being a weakling, I learned to be a good operator. I managed to produce it through my young by keeping a low profile. So when I began masturbating several times a day, I figured I was normal enough. After all, I was extremely attracted by the sight of the naked women in the sex powder magazine that I used as a optic aid, so I assumed that I must be convention.

I had heard about queers. Everybody I knew hated nance. The shoemaker's last matter anyone in my circle wanted was to be thought of as a queer ! There were queers in San Francisco, some of whom dressed and behaved like cleaning woman. I was told that the queers had ginmill and clubs where they hung out. These were revolting people to the masses I knew.. So when I found myself in front of that full length mirror, wearing my mother 's gamey heels, pantie and lipstick, I was revolted with myself.

It was around that metre that my full cousin and I were taking a shortcut through the Grant Wood. As we rounded a bending in the course we came upon a guy of around our own age, sitting on a boastfully Boulder, completely raw. We walked on in stunned silence until we heard him call out : `` Do you want a blowjob ? ''

I was enraged. This was an insult to my maleness. I told my cousin-german that we should go back and return this houri a whacking. We ran back to the Boulder but the nymph had disappeared. My first cousin and I resumed our journeying, speaking in tones of outrage as to what we would do if we ever saw that `` faggot '' again.

A few Clarence Day later I went back to the Boulder by myself, hoping to find oneself the nymph - not to beat him - but to join him. To do what, I did n't eff. Perhaps just to rollick naked with him, feeling the warm fountain piece of cake on our beautiful vernal bodies, or maybe to sit au naturel and provocative following to him, both of us soliciting veridical men as they passed by. I went back various times, hoping to see him, but I never saw him again.

My kinship with the opposite sex had always been strained. Now that I was broad of intimate desire, I imagined various girl of my acquaintanceship, naked with me. In reality these same girls left me tongue tied and red from embarrassment. Many guys of my age had matured to where they had begun to see and act like existent men. I was belittled and tight-fitting and had no eubstance fuzz to speak of early than a few sparse, very blonde hairs on my pubis. When I entered the navy at the age of 18, I still could have got easily passed as a good deal younger.

I had sex with another person for the first time when I was 18. I was in the dark blue and stationed in Calif.. I still had absolutely no confidence around female child, but I was always horny. I do n't live why I did it, but a few years after arriving at the understructure, I went walking through the swelter hot urban center late at night. I did n't know then that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', a homosexual terminal figure for looking for sex.

It was a very hot night and I was wearing a tank top and some really suddenly skimpie cutoffs, and my Joseph Black naval forces issue attire shoes with black air-sleeve that really accentuated my hairless, skinny, feminine looking Patrick Victor Martindale White pegleg ! After about an minute I spotted a car that I had seen earlier. God - I was so fucking HORNY ! I kept putting my bridge player in my pocket and pressing down on my erection.

I knew that the number one wood was hawking me. I knew that what I was doing was called `` cruising '', and I knew, oh so well, that was what what queers do - and I did n't care. I was so horny I just did n't give care ! The car came by again and this time pulled over. The number one wood had his window down. My heart was pounding and I was really nervous. Now I knew that this time I was the nymph, out for seduction. The driver leaned over. `` You need a elevator ? '' he asked. He was Latino, about 40, with a shaved head and a goatee.

I walked over to the passenger window. `` I do n't know '', I said. `` I 'm just hangin'out. ``

'' semen on, get in '', he said, reaching over and opening the door. I was really nervous - scare away - but something inside me told me I had to. I got in the car and closed the doorway. He drove off immediately, giving me these acute facial expression. He pressed the lock clitoris and I heard my threshold lock. Now I could n't get out even if I wanted to ! I stared true ahead. Then he put his hand on my bare leg. I stiffened, but said zilch. His hand began feeling my bare legs and I could find myself getting hard. `` Ju got ta silky legs, puto '', he said. `` Like a woman ! '' I blushed, embarrassed. I did n't bed what `` puto '' meant.

'' Thank you '', I said, still staring straight person ahead. He pulled over near a school.

'' Let 's go for a walking '', he said. We walked to the building and he led me to some exterior concrete footstep that descended to a basement room access. We went halfway down the stair, until we were out of mickle. It was a hot nighttime, dark and very secret. He stripped off his wifebeater and pulled off his jeans and undershorts, until he was naked in just his air-sleeve and oeuvre iron heel. He was really muscley, big blazonry with tons of big, hard muscles, shave head, goatee, and had a lot of tattoos on his arms and torso. He was so - fuckin - CUTE !

I quickly stripped to just my clothes brake shoe. As soon as I was naked he took me and pulled me close to his body, leaning down and kissing me deeply, his big hands were cupping my buttocks. He was really hot. He began kissing my lips, face, capitulum and cervix, calling me, `` juera, puto, '' and `` linda. '' He put his bridge player on my shoulder joint and pushed me down on my genu. `` Chupar mi pollo, marica ! '' He choked, gripping his operose cock. `` suction me. '' I had my commencement kiss, and now I was about to give my for the first time blowjob.

I had seen TV before of women sucking men off. I bent my caput and took the forefront of his dick into my backtalk and began sucking him off. He was moaning and ran his slurred fingerbreadth through my mop of thick blonde hair, entwining my hair in his fingerbreadth to control the movements of my bobbing skull. I ran my hands all over his big hairy legs. Suddenly he tensed and I felt my throat being flooded with warmly semen. I swallowed it and he relaxed back on the steps, his thorax panting. I remained crouched between his legs, resting my look against his second joint. I looked up at him. `` Didja like it ? '' I asked him, savoring the unfamiliar penchant of semen in my mouth.

'' Oh that was so good, `` juera '', he said. `` Where you learn to lactate stopcock like that ? '' I blushed and put my head down. I felt so ... rightfield, my cheek on his second joint, inhaling the smell of his bare flesh.

We had a cigarette and then put our apparel back on. The Latino - he told me his gens was Abel - drove me to the bus post. It was 1 a.m. The finish bus going to the base left a 1:15. Abel sat with me as I waited. He told me that he wanted to see me again. `` I want to bang you next time, Blondie '', he whispered. I looked at him. I was so naïve.

'' Fuck me ? But where ? I do n't have a pussy ? ''

'' I fuck you from behind - that is your chocha - your snatch. ''

I rode back to the bag, my head reeling from what had just happened. Now I was having second thoughts. I began to finger really angry - with myself - and with Abel. I began to transfer my anger to him, blaming him for what had happened at the school, as if he had reped me. After a few days I made friends with some of my fellow crewman and tried to put what happened with Niels Abel behind me.

I was fierce with myself on the bus bait back to base - and for several twenty-four hours afterward. Furious that I had let myself slip and acted like - like - I dont know ! Like some faggot ? I swore that it would never happen again, and I hated Abel for what he had done to me. I felt like killing him.

But guess what ? Two calendar week later, I was laying in my bunk with a hard on. it was a really hot, sweltering afternoon, and I began feeling demented horny ! I teased up my hair and put on my short-shorts and black clothes brake shoe with sinister wind sock rolled down around my ankles, and a skimpy black sinew shirt - which I had no business sector wearing as I had nothing resembling a brawniness on my body ! I looked in the mirror. God, I looked like a total faggot ! A consummate Milquetoast ! But my mind was sex crazed by that point and I just did n't chip in a ass ! It was 3 pm on Friday, and I did n't suffer to be back on tariff until Monday. I ran to the bus occlusion and caught the first bus to town.

On the ride to downtown all I could opine about was getting some hard cock ! It was still early when I got to town. I went straight from the bus station to a really begrime section of the metropolis. I spotted an old hotel and went to the desk and got a way. The clerk was an sometime bald headed mexican guy. He kept looking at me and licking his lips. I pulled out a precious coral pinko lipstick and applied some to my pouty lips, acting really sexy and putting on a display for him. I mean, I was n't gon na fuck him or anything - he was old and ugly - but it turned me on to know that he wanted me. He gave me the key and I went to my elbow room. It was a pretty nice room for a garbage dump. There were no windows, but I did n't care about that anyway. And there was air conditioning ! I decided to go out and cruise, hoping to find Niels Henrik Abel - or some other rough man - it made no difference to me. I went out, wearing nada but the rump baring jeans cutoffs - no shirt, no horseshoe - just the short short pants ! I felt so SEXY - and LIBERATED !

I had been thinking about Abel a lot lately. By the time I hit the street it was 7 pm. It was still light out, but the shadower were growing longer. I walked on a main drag, every so often cutting down the incline streets and coming back out on the main drag again. I knew I looked sexy and white trashy, barefoot with alone my flyspeck short-shorts and the pink lipstick ! I wore the pink lipstick because it was noticable but not too obvious. Because looking the way I was looking, the attention I was gon na get was either from some horny guys, OR - from gay bashers !

Then I spotted his pickup ! It was Abel ! My inwardness was pounding. I pretended not to see him, but I began walking a little more sexier, wiggling my hips a little more, behaving a lot Sir Thomas More feminine ! He pulled up next to me and I turned. I gave him a niggling smile, but continued walking. This time it was different. This clip I was feeling much more confident, and I knew how much he wanted me. I wanted him just as badly but I did n't want to act over eager. I wanted him to chase me a little.

'' Keven, I wan na talk to you ! '' he said.I kept walking, but looked over my shoulder, giving him a sexy look.

'' What ? '' I said.

. `` Keven, come in on, child, '' he said. Just get in the motortruck so we can talk - ok ? '' I smiled but kept walking, making for certain to put some wiggle in my ass. Suddenly he accelerated and pulled up in front of me, blocking my path. He jumped out of the car and ran up on me, taking my arm firmly in his big hired man. I tried to displume away but his grip was like iron. He bitch walked me back to the truck and put me inside. I knew dependable than to try and run - it would just really make water him off and - well - who knows what he would do ?

He drove off and I folded my weaponry and sulked. He reached over and pinched my jaws in his hand, so tight that it hurt. `` Do n't pout, Juera, he said harshly. `` What the fucking is the matter with you, Keven ? ''

I shook my forefront. `` Nothin''' I answered.

`` It 's just that ... well I 've been lookin for you all nighttime ! `` Jose pulled over and pulled me finish and kissed me deeply. Oh GOD ! Now I just KNEW I was in sexual love ! `` Honey, I got a motel room, '' I blurted out. `` We can go there, if you want. I do n't have to be back until Monday. ''

When we got to the motel, I could n't serve but see the desk shop clerk staring. I started talking loud and laughing, because I wanted him to see what a bountiful MAN I had. As soon as we got in the room I let my shortstop fall to the reason and stood there naked.. Niels Abel had stripped off too, and was standing in the dimly lit room, his papal bull like body, muscley and sweaty. I came up to him and ran my fruity small hands all over his gorgeous trunk, and then I licked and kissed his caramel brown chest. His strong script cupped my bare hind end and we kissed. Then he picked me up and carried me completely naked to the bed.

We were lying incline by side of meat, kissing and making out. Abel 's shaft was rock hard. So was my little dick. As we made love, I kept squeezing my man 's intemperate member, choking it down near the nucleotide. I got down between his big meaty legs and began sucking his cock and nut. He raised his legs, exposing his very hairy anus. `` Kiss it, puto, '' he said. My fount was aright next to his ass fix. I sniffed it and began to eat him out ! He groaned in pleasure as I hungrily nibbled and tongued out his rectum. Suddenly he lowered his legs and pulled me to him.

'' What is it, honey ? '' I asked him. `` Do n't you like it ? ''

'' I love it, marica, but I want to make love you now. '' He took a small tub of vaseline from the bedside tabular array. `` Here - grease up my putz, bitch. '' I did like he said. Then we began making out some more, and the more we did the more horny we both got. Abel got on top of me and was passionately kissing on my ears and cervix and tits. I began sobbing. `` What 's wrong ? '' he whispered.

'' Oh, honey, '' I sobbed. `` Am I like a char ? ''

'' You 're ALL cleaning woman, babe, '' he told me.

'' No - but am I YOU 'RE woman ? '' I asked.

'' You are about to be, '' he said, raising my legs up over his broad shoulders. I could feel the hardness of his raw meat poking near my rectum. I got scared.

'' Honey, is it gon na hurt ? Please do n't anguish me, honey, '' I begged.

'' Gon na hurt GOOD, baby, '' he growled, his jolting sandpaper jaw nuzzling my soft neck.

'' Sweetie, I do n't think I 'm prepare yet - I do n't opine we shou -- '' My word were choked of by a searing pain in my anus as the big mushroom question of his rigid cock ripped into me. I screamed in annoyance and tried to get out from under him, but I was totally helpless - that 's how potent he was. I thought I was gon na slip away out the pain was so bad, and then it began to subside as the head slid in deeper and deeper, until I felt his os pubis bump up against mine. He was in, globe deep. My cherry had been popped ! 'This is what it feels like to be a woman !'I thought.

Niels Abel began fucking me with long, slow separatrix. I began moving my hips in time with his rhythm. He was kissin all over me and I was babbling all sorts of obscenity - every vulgar, foul intimate cerebration spewed from my mouth, like diarreah. I could find his strong arms around me so tight I thought he would crack my ribs - and I did n't reach a piece of ass ! THIS is what I had been born to be - woman - a cocotte !

Now we were two naked human being, together as one, the headboard of our mating bed was pounding against the wall and I was whining and yelling in pure intimate JOY, my skinny lily-white wooden leg wrapped around my Mister 's bull like neck opening. Finally, Abel 's entire body tensed and he shouted out in pleasure as he emptied his load deep into my guts. Slowly he relaxed and soon lay over me.

We spent the rest of the weekend in bed. It was like a honeymoon. I was SO in love ! When Abel dropped me off at the bus post on Monday morning, we kissed and he promised to see me again next weekend. But I never saw him again. I know he was married, and that he 'd been in and out of prison, but that was it for us. I cried for weeks, but eventually I got over him. I hated myself for being faint - for being a faggot - and I swore that, from now on I was going completely flat !