MOVING HOUSE

It all started with a dumb-ass prank.

My son had broken up with his long-time partner, her having being playing away behind his back. When he off-loaded their apartment, he bunked down at mine for a few workweek while he got sorted. I could understand his pain, the same thing having happened to his mother and I four years earlier. I now lived on my own in a quite spacious top flooring studio, but with only one chamber, he had to sleep on the lounge in the front room.

Coincidentally, my lease was coming up for renewal, so we had a long talk and decided it would be good for us both to move into a 2 beddy and split the eyeshade. In another 12 months, we could see how we stood, and then move forward as required.

Sounds like a plan, yes ? Except for my son's dumb-ass prank.

My agent arranged an ‘ open-house viewing'of my place for prospective new tenants. fair enough.

He asked if we could make up ourselves scarce for the two hour assignment. almost of my ornaments and photo-frames were packed away anyway, so we collected up all our valuables and ‘ light-finger'attracter into a big composition board box and stowed them in the body of my car, then rode my son's SUV down the local shopping center. Just as we were parking up, my son slaps his forehead and announces he's forgotten his cell.

"You jump out, pop music, grab yourself a bite and I'll see you in fifteen in the food court."

So off he burns, and we meet up again 25 arcminute later, him with a big smirk on his face.

"What's with the big grin, you ass ?"

"Oh, nothin'daddy ….. There's machine pulling up everywhere outside when I left. It was funny."

"Don't surprise me.. Popular blot being so close to the mall and all."

"Yeah, really, really democratic,"he splutters down his nose, trying to conquer his laughter.

"Ass,"I says,"You're an ass."

..…

We wanders around the mall for a tenacious patch, my son seeming to drag his heels.

Then my cell rings…..

"All done, Mr. T. I'm just locking up. You can come up back now."

"agent,"I silently mouth at my son as I'm taking the call.

"By the way, Mr. T… have you been running a line from here ?"

"Scuse me ? business organization. What business ?"

"You know …. A business."

"Sorry. Dunno what you're talking about."

"Well, just so you know, Mr T., in this county it's illegal to run any flesh of business enterprise from a rental without permission from the agent, but seeing as you're leaving, I'll let this one slide."

"Oh, OK,"I response, shrugging my shoulder joint,"I'll be certainly to prevent that in mind."

…..

Returning to my place, my son is snorting a chuckle down his nose at almost every lamp-post.

"Ass"

….

When I walks into my bedroom, my jaw drops to the floor as the scales fall away from my centre.

Dangling from my bed head-board are two Seth of hand-cuffs. A chrome shiny set on one side, and knock furry-fluffy ones on the former. On top of my bedside storage locker, there's an mixture of feeding bottle of oils and jells, along with a strewing of unopened prophylactic packets and condom baseball mitt. On the floor there's a couple of canes and wooden spoonful, along with a bin, half full of scrunched up tissues.

But most damning of all, there's a whiteboard leaning up against the rampart with my cell phone number at the top and a long list of random female names down one side. Along-side each public figure there are various annotation

A only, no A, both, rough, assuage, farsighted tease, no marks, long as poss…… the inclination went on.

I turn to my son, who's now standing right behind me in paroxysm of laughter and I says,

"spoonful ? Wooden spoon ? What the underworld were you thinking ?"

………..

I took it for the dumb-ass prank that it was. It seemed pretty coolheaded, thinking I could probably tell this story a hundred sentence before I died. But a span of days later my cell rang….

…..

I was already running late for my veritable golf stint with my topper teammate, Pete, over at the links about 40 min drive away. I knew the dealings would be building with aurora school-run Mom's taxi, so I was in no mood to be stuffed around, so when the female person voice on the other end stuttered and faltered and dithered with a"Errm, I was just calling, I mean, needed to address. I hope it's not a bad metre, but it, I was wondering, if you don't mind ….."

Just around then my frustration boiled over and against my normal nature, I pretty a great deal barked,

"well, spit it out woman…."

"Oh, yes, good-for-naught sir,"my harsh snap appearing to sweep away her falter. You could almost try her shamble to sit herself upright in her seat."My name is Charmaine, and I'm calling from Pollomina-Watts Real acres ……"

Now she had my to the full care. These were the realtors of my son and I's new place where I'd signed the lease and paid a substantial Julian Bond and repository. I would be handing back the keys to the old shoes in two twenty-four hour period, and couldn't afford for anything to go wrong.

"Yes, how can I assist ?"I queried. It was I who had suddenly become contrite.

"As you know, well obviously, you passed all our reference point and police checks, but I had neglected to call up your former leasing agent."

"Yes ?"I scooped, in a drawn out recognition of her actions. I had no idea where this would be going.

"fountainhead, he told me you appeared to have been running some sorting of business from the premises."

"Oh, no, no no, he's got it all wrong ….."I began my apologetic explanation about it only being a prank.

"Because it's not classed as a job if you don't tutelage a fee,"she butted in, almost as a blurted-out gush.

I could see this as an easy get-out, and I was conscious of now running late for my golf-date.

"No, I don't burster anything. It's all entirely free."

"Oh, thank goodness,"the relief in her voice almost palpable."You see, I can't afford much, with my husband keeping a close eye on my spending and all."

"Woah, woah woah"I chattered about seven times in the distance of a second.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry,"she responded to my halt,"If you're not taking on any more bookings…."

"No, it's not that …."

This was getting all too much and sliding way out of deal. I needed time to think.

"Look, the truth is, you're making me late for an naming and I need to get moving, the traffic's getting busier by the minute. You're gon na have to call me back after lunch. Can you do that ?"

"Oh,"she sounded surprised,"You sometimes do ….. ?"

"After lunch."I cut her off, then in a flash of dastard inspiration, for my finis Word before I pressed ‘ end call,'I took a deep breathing place and growled down the transmission line,"From now on you start calling me ‘ master.'”

…………..

Not surprisingly, my golf musical score was rubbish. Fifteen over par.

"What the hell's gotten into you ?"quizzed my long-time friend and golf buddy as we sat in the 19th kettle of fish breast feeding our cold beers."I know I usually win, but jeez, man, you usually give me a run for my money. Wha'sup ?"

"A very unusual quandary has reared its straits, Pete, and I think you're just the right man to establish me some fatherly advice."

…

At 48, Pete is actually one year unseasoned than me, but has had a replete and checked love life live, having been divorced twice and currently having two women on the go. And having spent hundreds of drunken hours sharing our shit down the pub, I don't think there were any secrets between us…. I'd no problem with spilling my guts….

….

"Wow, that's pretty rad, man,"said Pete after a retentive blast through puffed-out buttock."Even that's a new one on me. I'm not sure what to suggest."

"Do you call back I should go for it though ? Would you ?"

"well assuming this Charmaine chick isn't really, really impertinent and trying to pull a immobile one, then sure, whirl her in. At least you'll get one liberal snapshot with no backlash. If you can't remember seeing her at the agency and don't know what she's like, then hey, if she's married, she'll be too frightened to kick up a bicker if she turns out to be a dud and you tell her to fuck off. And let's face it, Dez, your sex life hasn't exactly been front-page intelligence this concluding couplet of years."

"Suppose,"I conceded.

"Yeah, go on, go for it, bro. And hey, if she's not your type, you can always give her my phone number and let me give birth a crack."

"Easy, tiger,"I said, snorting a laugh down my nose."One footstep at a fourth dimension, eh ? One step at a time."

……….

"howdy, yeah, hi. It's Charmaine here. I'm just calling back like you said."

"Yeah, and you're late,"I barked."I said two o'clock on the dot."

"No, you didn't, I …."

"Are you calling me a liar ?"

"No, I, it's … she started to jibber.

"I've already told you once, it's ‘ master'from now on. So let's try again shall we ? Are you calling me a prevaricator ?"I growled with a smirk on my font. C'mon gripe, dig your own grave.

"No, master."

I then heard her heavy inhale of breath down the line. I've barely said ten words and she was terrified. Maybe not of me, but of potentially handing her fate to a complete stranger. A stranger who has handcuff dangling from his bed-head. And by sexual morality of Pete's crash course in his dandy women wiseness, her panting revealed she was already juicing up.

Oh boy, was this going to be fun.

…………..

I established when she'd have a duad of time of day disembarrass time to come over to mine, and ordered her to be here on the dot. She already knew the computer address. In fact, with her being on the renting staff, I reasoned there was an even luck she could've been inside here before.

I'd get clean with my son. For mess of reasons really, not least of which being the fact he had the manacle, lubricator and rubber stashed away in his bed-room. I can't imagine why he hadn't thrown them away.

Just kidding…

Anyway, my son thought I was nuts, but being as it was his prank which had kick-started this unhurt debacle in the offset property, decided there was no impairment in being supportive, although there was no need for his ‘ stopping point hurrah'comments.

…………

At the allotted metre two good afternoon later, there is a faint bash at my door….

………….

I was quite taken aback when I opened up to see her for the initiative prison term, and as we looked at each other straight eye to eye. I'd certainly never seen the charwoman before in my sprightliness, because I sure as shit would've remembered.

She was about five foot two with short embrown fuzz and looked to be in her forties, with big chubby, high-boned, waxy-skin cheeks under sparkly dispirited oculus. Although her smiling was weak, almost excusatory and embarrassed, her sass were full and red. Her neck was very broad and she had a loose, almost dangly turkey bivalent Kuki. Her shoulders were broad like that of a manual of arms laborer, and the arms protruding from her wanton hang kaftan seemed curtly, being flabby and bloated with fat. Her titty where quite prominent but looked very droopy, like two big plastic udder full of piddle. Her light blue vertical-striped caftan did it's just to camouflage the big blob of a woman it concealed, with an abdomen which could well have contained overdue triplets. Two chunky, thick elephantine branch stretching down to a pair of fat chubby ankles completed the fit. She must've easy been magnetic north of two 50 pounds.

….

"Charmaine, I presume."

She gave a ace nod ‘ yes'of her foreland, causing her flabby double-chin to wobble like jelly and then squash out at the incline as her regard fell down to the floor.

"wellspring, Charmaine, there is no need to mouth, not even one watchword. You don't even have to say the Word ‘ master ’. But there's only me here in this flat, and if you walk in through this doorway and shut it behind you, I'm gon na expend the next 60 minutes and a half fucking your brain out."

With that, I turned on my cad away from the wide open door and went and sat on my reclining chair in the waiting room room.

I waited with ride breathing space. If I heard the doorway close and then her step clumping up the hall I decided I'd better pop both the vitalagras I had ready and waiting in my pocket.

Although I was surprised by her size, I wasn't surprised this get hitched with woman wasn't getting her need met by her married man. He was probably screwing the ass off a nubile houri somewhere, a pixy a quarter the size of it of his wife. Maybe some randy new tart from his workplace, perhaps, a slim bint nothing like what he now had at place. But I cursed him under my breathing spell for being the lawsuit of this big dollop of lard landing on my doorstep. And with both vitalagras now poised in my hand, it was a dollop on the verge of getting an afternoon of right royal stag fucking.

………

I heard the Yale's aloud ginger snap as its auto-lock clicked the door fully closed. I held my breath so I could get a line any strait, and exhaled with a mixture of emotions when I heard her shuffling her ft on the embossed ‘ welcome home'ft rub in the hall-way.… I swallowed both the vitalagras.

"In here,"I yelled, giving her determination and centering, and looked back over my berm as I felt her front fill the lounge doorway.

"come on in, don't be shy. I won't collation, well not on your maiden sojourn,"I taunted as I waved my hand indicating she should fully enter the room and stand in presence of my relaxed, seated position.

"Now then,"I took control as she stood nervously twitching and fidgeting a simple six feet in front of my bent knee."Look at me and listen up …. in here, you are no longer Charmaine, yes ? You left that prim and right lady at the limen. You will now be referred to as ‘ slut ’. You will be my fornicatress twenty three, but just a uncomplicated ‘ fornicatress'will suffice from now on, got that ?"

She gave a 1 nod yes of her capitulum, accompanied by a draft, as her gaze sank down to the floor.

"Look at me,"I barked, causing her head to re-lift and her eyes to mesh back onto mine."That non-answer has just earned you a small but painful penalisation. You know what you should've said, don't you ?"

"Yes, master,"It was a mussitate, but perfectly hearable.

"What was that ?"my press making her visibly squirm.

"Yes, master,"her voice now more steady and sure.

"I still didn't hear it."I menaced with a growl in my vocalisation. I wanted an admit capitulation.

"Yes, master,"she said, firm and committed, but then she took me totally by surprise.

"I just can't do this,"a quaver in her voice,"I really shouldn't have come …. I can't,"as she takes a footfall towards the door, obviously about to take flight.

I must allow, I panicked. That was completely out of left-field, and I wasn't surely what I should do. I had visual modality of me standing in the sorrel being sworn in as the thrill of abduction and attempted rapine were read out to the panel. On the early hand, she had come because she needed something, and I'm a sensible guy. Certainly not the heartless dom-master she probably thinks I am. I took the line of to the lowest degree resistance.

I shot to my human foot and took two strides to front her and cast aside my arm around as a lot of her coat of arms and berm as I could circle, drawing her to my chest of drawers and giving a soothing,"Hey, hey, hey,"as simultaneously she broke down in sobbing wet tears.

"I understand,"I soothed. There was no way I was going to let her walk out in a disillusioned and distressed state. It would be my word against hers in court.

"come on, now,"I oozed."come and sit. If you aren't well-to-do with this I'm not going to coerce you, not if it's not what you really want. That isn't the way this thing works."

I guided her back to my big old piano recliner, and watched as she slowly eased herself down and perched unsteadily on its soft, spongy edge.

"I'm sorry,"she wet sniffed as her tear-wet puffy impudence glistened it the light."I didn't, can't ……"

"S'ok."I reassured. As least she wasn't going to run out on me."Take a moment. You're upset."

"No, I … it's just that when Mal told me what he thought you did …."

She saw me quizzically chase my brow as I pitched my head to one side.

"Sorry, when Mal, Malcomb from Red Roof said you were some kind of male person …. Well, he wasn't sure what you were, it sounded like something I might need. I had to make out and see …."

"And what do you involve ?"I asked with actual interest and concern. She didn't know it, but this was all new dominion to me.

"Oh, I don't know. Something different, some hullabaloo maybe. You've certainly given me that,"she said with a exclusive snort wet laugh down her runny wet nose.

"Here, let me get you a tissue."

…..

The short interlude whilst I went and grabbed a box of tissues from my bedroom gave her decent meter to twist back into a more normal and well-off military position in my reclining chair. I held out the box and she swooshed out various little whiteness squares.

"So, what do you need to do now ?"I asked."Technically you've booked me for the afternoon…… a free booking,"I added with haste.

"Oh, I don't care if you charge any others or not. It's just that I haven't got any trim money."

Several cruelly cutting and heartless responds sprang immediately to take care, but I thought I'd best keep my sarcastic rima oris shut.

"Well, we have the afternoon,"I repeated my observance as I pulled up a spare electric chair and sat opposite this blob queen who had made herself at place in my very own recliner,"So, say me a bit about yourself."

I honestly didn't want to hear it, because I pretty much guessed what was coming, and I'd only entertained her presence because of the chance of a mindless, guilt-free, foresighted screwing, which apparently seemed now wiped off the carte du jour. But I was relieved she was very unlikely to go to the authorisation accusing me of being some sort of predatory sexual monster.

I sat for respective recollective minutes and listened. Her rambling aliveness story was about as predictable as blizzard in winter. At a couple of full point I couldn't suppress an involuntary deep yawn. Then I realised I was growing an erection. Not just any old prowler. This was a full on throbbing sword girder of vitalagra induced weaponry.

holy crap …. I'd forgotten about that.

……

I shifted uncomfortably on my uncomfortable wooden chairwoman. I leaned forward almost like I had a cramp in my stomach, and with my legs squashed together I pressed my entwined digit grasp at the closed gap of my second joint near my knees.

"Are you OK ?"she asked with concern,"You look, well, in pain."

In pain in the neck ? My blooper was threatening to explode.

"It's just that….."I hesitated. It was me who was embarrassed now. I spilled the truth.

"When I entertain, if I were to put it like that, I take an enhancer, you know, a pill, to maximize my performance and go along me on the go for, well, hours if pauperism be. Solely for the benefit of my entertainees, you understand ? I like to think I send away satisfied clients."

"And you took one when I arrived ?"

"When I knew you'd come in and closed the door behind you, yes."

"And you're erm…."as she nods her head at my bent over posture,"you're enhanced now ?"

"Like a flagpole."I blurted my confession. It seemed pointless to try proceed hiding the uncomfortable truth.

"Oh …"was her appall and intrigued reaction to this out of the blue Revelation of Saint John the Divine."And you took this enhancer ‘ after'you'd met me ?"the meaning of the ‘ after'now slowly sinking in.

"Well, obviously,"I said with a dash of pain in the neck at her slow up uptake of the situation.

"So you intended to….."

"Very much so ….."

"fountainhead, I suppose we shouldn't let your foil go to run off ………."

……..

The end…. of piece one ? You tell me.

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