Mr D'arcy has but recently taken up irregular living accommodations near the Bennet residence for the shooting season and speculation forth to meet his new neighbours.

history Humour.

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"Mr D'arcy how delightful !"Mrs Bennet simpered as her new neighbour arrived on hogback quite unannounced one spring morning.

"Indeed brothel keeper the pleasure is all mine !"Mr D'arcy replied airily,"Tis a pleasant plenty footling place you have here, quite like my lodging at Manderly but somewhat smaller I fear."

"Oh Mr D'arcy you are too kind,"Mrs white avens smiled through gritted teeth,"Come you must meet my young woman,"she added, seeing an opportunity to marry one off, and called upon them to come through.

"This is Jayne my eldest,"Mrs white avens declared.

"Ah plain Jayne, how reserve,"Mr D'arcy greeted her.

"And Eliza,"Mrs white avens indicated her minute eldest.

"I don't think I've had the pleasure,"Mr Darcy smarmed.

"Oh Mr D'arcy"miss Eliza replied,"I can ensure you that you would surely have remembered if you had had the pleasure of spearing my warm wet uterus with your rampant member and feeling my well muscled thighs gripping and squeezing you, my rampant breasts and pert nipples spearing into your manly chest."

"Ah, I meant of meeting you,"Mr D'arcy explained,"I should of course have remembered every particular had we conjoined for I do declare you are the most outspoken and forward Brigham Young adult female I have ever encountered."

"Not to interest Mr D'arcy,"Miss Bennet explained,"I changed the bed linen not three daytime ago should you wish to tread upstairs."

"I merely wish to make your acquaintance,"Mr D'arcy explained in exasperation.

"Why ? do you not trust to compare me carnally to a panoptic variety of early Loretta Young noblewoman before making your choice of Saint Brigid ?"miss Eliza enquired.

"Indeed not madam,"Mr D'arcy explained somewhat painfully,"I merely wished to investigate if I might bourgeon a few of your pheasants as I fear I have slaughtered the vast majority of those at Manderley and the season has hardly begun."

"Indeed shoot away for we have peasants far in nimiety of our needs,"Mrs Geum virginianum simpered,"gardeners, ostlers, idlers, why we have a perfect embarrassment of peasants..

"Pheasants mother, not Peasants."Eliza cautioned."One can not blast Peasants."

"In the lord's name why not ?"Mrs Bennet exclaimed,"If one might not germinate them how is discipline to be maintained ?"

"Miss Eliza, I have done you a dis-service,"Mr D'arcy exclaimed,"I had thought you the most idiotic and completely deluded fair sex I had ever met but I own you are indeed quite sane compared to your mother."

"How are we to impose discipline Mr D'arcy if we can not shoot the miscreant ?"Mrs white avens demanded."One can not transmit a rack around with one and whipping is no substitute."

"Dear lord mother he wants to scoot a few Bronx cheer,"Miss Eliza sighed,"And yet you suggest he shoots our servants and takes your daughters to his bed."

"To be bazaar she only suggested I take you to bed Miss Eliza,"Mr D'arcy argued.

"And shall you ?"Eliza enquired.

"Alas no, the thought of my progeny having your countenance and wit entirely repulses me,"Mr D'arcy replied.

Mrs white avens recoiled at the sentiment,"So birth them sent to the orphanage as Mr bennet and I should have done when we failed to secure a son and heir.

"An first-class suggestion, as ever mother,"Eiza sighed,"No thought for my sentiments."

Mr Geum canadense staggered drunkenly into the breakfast elbow room after a break fast of Rum and Pullman porter in roughly compeer proportions."Oh don't be so unemotional dear, One can not stimulate sentiments where marriage is concerned, let the Gentleman sample the merchandise."

Eliza fumed,"He desires to sample me not wed me."

"Indeed I do not,"Mr D'arcy sighed,"I merely wish to shoot your Peasants, I mean Pheasants."

"Then why have you a trouser hump Mr D'arcy ?"Mr Bennet observed.

"Father !"young lady Eliza declared,"Do you really expect me to espouse with Mr D'arcy without a promise ?"

"Oh really Mr Geum canadense,"Mrs Geum canadense declaimed,"Would you let just any gentleman's gentleman sample your girl without a promise."

"Actually,"Eliza observed,"Now you mention it his trouser bulge looks most promising."

"Come on man, make a hope,"Mr Bennet ordered.

"Very well, ten guineas and ten more than if she pleases me,"Mr D'arcy offered.

"Done,"Mr Geum virginianum agreed delightedly,"Ring my bookmaker forthwith."

"Father the Telephonograph has yet to be invented,"Jayne reminded him.

"Oh yes damnit, bring my boots !"he retorted.

Mr D'arcy duly handed over the ten guineas.

"Up the steps, first on the left,"Mrs Bennet directed.

"misfire Bennet ?"Mr D'arcy graciously invited Eliza to take his arm and she led him to the stairs.

"Do you propose to seduce me Mr D'arcy ?"Eliza enquired.

"Lord no,"D'arcy replied,"No meter for that, If you get your kit off I'll shove it up you right away, let us get on with it."

Eliza opened the bed chamber door and led Mr D'arcy in.

She sat on the bed sharpness and pulled her dress up revealing her split crotch leging which with a complete deficiency of Pantaloon gave entirely unfettered entree to her angelic unstained vagina

"No need for undressing on my character Mr D'arcy,"she explained as she spread her legs.

A rapid increase in the swelling in Mr D'arcy's breeches forced him to discard the said breeches over which he promptly fell as they bunched around his mortise joint. The fall buried his face in Eliza's generous cleavage. She helped him up and guided his rampant member towards her waiting wanting moistened womb lips.

He thrust mightily,"Bleedin'hell are you a flaming virgin ?"he gasped,"Er I mean gosh are you virgo intacto ?"

"Not any more with your dick up me,"Eliza replied.

"Damnit, I hate Virgin,"he explained,"Such tough work for so little reward."

"I might well convey the same sentiments about your member,"Eliza opined as the aforesaid penis slowly eased within her moist vagina and opened up the cavern leading to her womb.

"Though,"he continued,"Perhaps when your wooden leg are wrapped around me and your naked knocker press."

"For ten French Guinea ?, in your dreams."Eliza opined.

"twenty dollar bill then, a Hundred !"D'arcy offered.

Eliza felt herself melting as his seductive words washed over her.

"Very well, rip my bodice open and feel my bosoms,"Eliza replied as D'arcy's member sank ever deeper within her.

He did as she asked opening his shirt as he did so until their naked dresser entwined as their back talk entwined and he shot his shipment, rather prematurely, deep inside her.

"Is that it ?"Eliza enquired.

"Afraid so old girl,"D'arcy apologised as he slid his shrinking member from her.

"Er about the repose of the one C ginzo ?"Eliza queried.

"In your dreams,"he retorted.

"Bastard !"she replied.

"You're beautiful when you're angry,"D'arcy reassured her. His member swelled again and before they knew it she was once again firmly screwed to the bed by his pulsing cock.

"Are you insatiable ?"Eliza asked.

"Not usually, one guessing curiosity who comes too soon generally,"he apologised,"Er don't fancy moving in with me do you ?"

"How big is your theatre in Derbyshire ?"she asked.

"Seventy three chamber,"he replied.

"I'll think about it,"she said as t she felt the kickoff stirring of an orgasm oceanic abyss in her womb,"Might as well,"she thought,"It'll get me away from my mad mother and alcoholic Padre,"

"Yes !"she agreed.

D'arcy breathed a sigh of easing, she might be a good lay but never a c guinea worth and based on past times experience she would dump him within weeks.

So they conjoined delightedly for very different reasons. Who would induce the better of the deal.

Their junction completed they returned to the sitting room.

"mom Mr D'arcy has asked me to move in with him,"Eliza simpered.

"Excellent,"Mr Bennet declared,"Your bags are over there if you wish to leave now."

Mr D'arcy recoiled at the thought of what he had done, of a life ruined, perchance forced to get married Eliza, to have to sleep and lie with her every night, to give suck her with child tits and spear her juicy cleaning lady's parts each and every nighttime. His fellow member swelled at the thought."illusion a quickie before we go ?"

"Yes why not,"Mrs Bennet agreed.

"Not you mother, me !"Eliza exclaimed.

Mrs white avens was enraged, Jayne looked disappointed.

Eliza continued,"Perhaps we could do it if I bent over the table in the billiard elbow room ?"

"An first-class suggestion,"Mr Bennet agreed,"I shall get the handmaid, they don't get practically entertainment."

"Fetch away father, it will all be over by the fourth dimension they stir themselves,"Eliza prophesied and indeed in this she was adjust. However a well-timed leverage of a tool ring and her pleasure was to be brought to new heights especially when they repaired to his mansion house in Derbyshire and she became queen of all she surveyed.

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