antediluvian Rome, about 0 BC

"Oi Nozzer, what you at mate ?"Mark Anthony shouted above the clamour of a busy Rome morning.

"Off down the Colloseum whole step,"Nostradamous replied,"They got some new Gaulish George Herbert Mead and a new batch of slant slaves."

"sound thoroughly, I'll tell Julie,"Gospel According to Mark Anthony replied.

"cry me Julie again and your headland will join those of the Hun on the ear above the city Bill Gates,"Julius Ceasar chipped in.

"All right go on your crownwork on,"stain Anthony replied,"Do you estimate they got any virgins Nozzer ?"

"Six calendar week in a boat with a bunch of steamy oarsman, I don't think so,"Nozzer replied,"More the like Oars, anyway the came from what the Angles call"Es Sex"what ever that is."

"Right,"scar Anthony agreed.

"Anyway I thought you had a regular bunk up with Cleo ?"Nozzer continued.

"Oh yeah, great, great compexion, great in the sack but she bathes in domestic ass Milk and malodour like a crashing donkey,"mark Antonius replied.

"Can't have it all,"Nozzer laughed,"See you later right ?"

Nozzer called in on his fellow Michael Angelo on his way to the Colloseum,"Mikey how you doing match ?"he called.

High above the base of the Sistine chapel service Mikey was lying on a scaffold board having a kip and sleping off a heavy dark on the mead and ale.

"Diminu - bloody - endo,"Mikey replied,"bread and butter the racket down. Me heads splitting mate."

"It's the paint partner, you want to use top not cow dung,"Nozzer suggested,"Anyway it was only supposed to take a week, two coats of briliant white they said."

"Mate, they are paying by the day and they like my graffito,"Mikey explained,"Money for old rope like."

"All right for some,"Nozzer replied,"You hear about Pisa Lighthouse ?"

"Every fucking organic structure heard about Pisa beacon, started keeling over so they put a crook in it,"Mikey sighed,"Just fuck off and do some Philosopherising or what ever it is you do."

"Charming,"Nozzer agreed,"screwing you too."

The Colloseum was busy, every cunt and his mate was there eyeing up the new slaves.

Some was naked, the Angle and frog was so pale they needed browning up to be fanciable, but the Arabians had to be kept under covert or they blacked up, most was shackled together but some was in individual wooden cages.

"What's the period of that ?"Nozzer asked some random bloke.

"From Greece, fucking Lesbos,"he said.

"From Mytilene or are they Lesbo's ?"Nozzer asked.

"Twat,"the bloke answered,"Anyway what can I do you for ?"

"Oh a nice bird, say XX one, blonde, big melons,"Nozzer replied.

"How much you got ?"the bloke queried.

"fifty, L five at a push,"Nozzer offered.

"Well you can possess her,"he pointed to a beautiful Angle Angel,"From Wessex, beautiful girl, fucks like an backer,"he taunted,"For one hour for fifty."

"I want's a house slave,"Nozzer explained.

"For fucking 50, you wan na get real married person,"the lad replied,"You can stimulate her mum,"he said pointing to a wrinkled old hag.

"Nah, rather fuck a camel,"Nozzer admitted.

"shuffle up yer mind, tart or scrubber, cleaner."the bloke sighed exasperated.

"Bit of both,"Nozzer replied.

"That's a get laid wife, don't go there mate they're trouble,"the gent advised before he saw some other mug and fucked off to con him instead.

Nozzer wandered off,"Houseboy sir ?"some adult female hollered, pointing at half a dozen defenseless cuss tied up in a pen.

Nozzer looked up,"Hung like Donkeys,"she said.

"flavour like you been taking vantage,"Nozzer quipped.

"Every one-half hour, come and see the show,"she offered.

"For ass sake !"Nozzer sighed,"I ent fucking Hellenic !"

"No ?"says the char as she grabs the nearest slave's cock and starts wanking it,"You sure ?"

"Absolutely,"Nozzzer says.

"Then why you getting a hard on ?"she asked,"You want me to wank your piffling cock instead ?"she asked.

Nozzer looked down at his Toga, it was like a collapsible shelter magnetic pole was pushing it out,"Fuck !"he said out loud.

The woman suddenly left her slave and stuck her paw up Nozzer's Toga. He wished he had put on white pants but they was in the washables so he had come out without any.

"Ooooh you are a big boy,"she cooed,"5 Sirstes to make you cum or I'll rip it out by the radical for free."

Nozzer liked it rough,"Rip it out by the roots,"he requested,"Please."

She dropped him like a shot,"Fuck off pervert !"she said abruptly.

"Me a piece of tail perv ?"he snapped,"Its you what fucks hard worker in public ten fourth dimension a day !"

"Twenty on a good day,"she smiled.

Nozzer shook his head and went unit of ammunition to see the animals. Andreas the Lion Tamer was looking worried.

"Wazzup Andy,"Nozzer queried.

"nookie Gaul bit Leo,"he said pointing to one of his lions foot,"Gone infected, look."

Nozzer was stupid but not stuid enough to get in a Leo John Cage to count at an septic substructure at Lion's tiffin prison term, which was basically any time a Leo the Lion wasn't actually a kip.

"tone bad,"Nozzer agreed.

"Poor bugger's off his provender look."Andy qipped pointing at an old Phoenician twosome liberally coated with Lycopersicon esculentum sauce cowering naked at the backbone of the cage.

"You'll have to get a new one I reckon,"Nozzer said unhelpfully.

"Oh outstanding assistant,"Andy replied.

"What odds on him winning Fri ?"Nozzer asked.

Andy had a think and then said"If its Christians again it's a dead cert but Gallia, I reckon old Leo will run a flaming leage."

Nozzer nodded and went to break out the Chariots for Sabbatum race. His match Benner was working on his two horse chariot carefully adjusting the tracking by walloping the wooden axle as hard as he could with a vast mallet.

"Fucks sake Benner you'll bust it fellow,"Nozzer cautioned

"I don't fucking care if I do,"Benner cursed,"Fucking understeers on the entranceway to Lesmo 1 then oversteers on way out."

"Too very much ass information,"Nozzer suggested,"See yah."

Nozzer was bored, he worked nights working out the future from the lead, it wasn't a bad job, lie on the roof for a few minutes a dyad of meter a month and dream up some load of bolloks to narrate the twats down the senate. Writing it up was the worst, three coil all the Sami for different departments. Anyroad it beat Lion Taming and being a Gladiator.

He wandered up the synagogue of Vesta to have a bit of banter with the"Vestal Virgins."

There was a bit of a kerfuffle. Some bird was getting chucked out of a a side doorway. Nozzer recognised her, she used to live near his gaff, her dad was summat in the Senate.

Nozzer wandered up to stand by his beak in,"Analise ?"he queried.

"fuck off pervert,"she replied sharply, before she recognised him."Oh sorry, you're Nostradamus ain't you ?"

"Yes, call me Nozzer,"he replied helpfully.

"Bloody bitches have chucked me out, me dad will sustain a fit,"she stormed.

"But why ?"Nozzer asked.

"Do I have to draw a exposure ?"she snapped,"They want Virgins."

"Oh,"Nozzer said awkwardly.

"I was having a crafty wank and got carried away,"she said.

"You are Analise ?"he enquired.

"Yes, sorry, they call me Swan Vesta in the Temple, I thought you were after anal,"she replied.

"I shouldn't mind as it happens,"Nozzer replied.

"wellspring forget it,"she snapped,"Oh fuck now what do I do, Dad'll go mad."

"Lie low for a bit ?"Nozzer suggested,"You can kip round my gaff if you like."

"In your bed ?"she asked.

"If you like,"he smiled.

"And if I don't ?"she asked

"You can catch some Z's on the floor after I fucked you ?"he ventured.

"Oh well beggars can't be choosers,"she said happily as she gathered up her meagre belonging,"Lead on."

Nozzer was gob smacked, usually he paid a few Sirstes for a guff up with a slave and got tod to bang off by free charwoman but suddenly here was a bird what was up for it. He should have sensed a gob but his brain was definitely switched off and his bollocks firmly in control.

"Failed monthly inspection, said me Hymen was bust,"Analise explained,"Anyway what were you doing here ?"

"Bored, I was looking for house hard worker to hold open the theater clean and jerk and that."he explained.

"And that ?"she asked.

"That,"he agreed.

"phone like you need a wife,"she suggested.

"Right, so where do I come up a married woman ?"he asked.

"Are you blind or just unintelligent ?"Analise asked.

"Oh, flavor I didn't mean value,"Nozzer said.

"Yes of course I will !"Analise gasped and kissed Nozzer on the cheek.

Nozzer was shocked,"Look"he said.

"Oh, lets get round your place and consumate it !"Analise taunted.

Nozzer warmed to the estimation. Analise offered up a silent appeal, Nozzer wasn't the well catch but his bed beat sleeping on the sett of the Autostrada.

In just a few bit they were in Nozzer's gaff. Analise gritted her dentition and slipped off her toga.

"Do you like what you see ?"she simpered.

"Uh ?"Hozzer replied but his prick spoke for him.

"Oh you are a big boy,"Analise exclaimed as she saw the front of his toga rise propelled by his knob end, she had serious doubts that something that big would actually fit inside her.

She sat on the edge of the board, spread her legs, closed her eyes and dreamed some beautiful prizefighter was about to spear her.

"Oh Annie you're so beautiful,"he husked and kissed her forehead.

Her pussycat began to sense moist. She kept her eyes tightly closed so she didn't have to look at Nozzer's ugly mug,"Do it !"she husked.

A searing nuisance wracked her mind as Nozzer brutally shoved his core into her soft yielding kitty-cat,"Awww, that fucking hurt !"she railed.

"Tis done now my love,"Nozzer explained,"No more pain just pleasure."

"In your screwing dreams Ilex paraguariensis you're tearing me in one-half !"she replied but the pain was subsiding.

Actually it was starting to feel quite courteous, Annie warmed to the idea, she opened her eyes, to be reliable Nozzer didn't tone quite as ugly, she could get used to this she decided.

"Oh that feels so nice,"she cooed.

"Not bad is it ?"Nozzer agreed and he promptly shot his load.

Annalise wasn't expecting it, what with never having it before and that. All that love juice shot up inside her,"What the roll in the hay's going on."she asked.

"Just take me loading darling,"Nozzer explained,"Oh fuck I'm kn ackered."

"Is that it ?"Analise enquired.

"cashbox I'e had a kip and a feed,"Nozzer agreed,"Then game on round two."

"In your aspiration,"she replied,"Anyway we have to recount Daddy we're engaged."

Too late Nozzer sensed the trap,"Engaged ? I'm just letting you kip here ?"

"Oh you heartless fucking fauna,"she wailed putting on a decent show of Nile Crocodile rip,"Professing that you love me only to cast me aside as soon as you've slimed me."

"Nice one,"I suppose next off you'll be telling papa I fucking forced you ?"

"Err,"Analise stalled realising she'd been rumbled.

"wellspring rustle up a one-half decent portion and I'll nooky marry you,"Nozzer offered.

"hawkshaw headspring, that's why I was a VV, Dad's too broke to pay a decent dowry,"Annie replied.

"Oh well let's see what he's oblation,"Nozzer offered,"On the early hand LET not, I got another stiffy. On your back wench, it's your golden day ! ”