In the CAW 24 thread, Pars001 asked :

'' also can it have a sci fi mystery or foreign romance theme ? after all I am foreign ''

My reply was :

'' How about treaty negotiations between the < insert name here > alien backwash and the homo. The final treaty has to be consummated by sex between an alien and a man. For extra pointedness, tell it from both human and extraterrestrial stage of view.

BTW : This is not an exclusively original idea. ``

I had to try this one.

—

The president stared at the webpage, its oversaturated juicy colour hurt his middle, but it was the video which was just confusing and made his headache. How did they do that ? He looked at his briefing papers for reference, the diagram of the alien female. If he squinted, you might mistake them for normal people, in a dark alley, during a big businessman outage. Everything was just in the wrong station, and he really did n't desire to reckon of the procedure of that orifice, just following to their reproductive orifice.

He turned to his chief science advisor. `` Are you totally sure this is how they do it ? ``

'' The linguist are positivist mr Chief Executive. They studied the body language in minute contingent, it was said as if it were the most normal body process. They 'll be mightily offended if we do n't do it their way. ``

'' He really said, 'its consummated with a piece of tail on live TV, your president and our president'? ``

'' That 's exactly what he said mr United States President. ``

'' And we 've confirmed that that 's what he meant ? ``

'' We asked most politely for clarification, and that is what he meant. He seemed perturbed by the doubtfulness. We do n't want to weaken the talks, so we just moved politely onto the logistics of the act. ``

'' This is n't going to kill me or maybe spoilt, kill her ? ``

'' All the information shows we are extremely compatible. We evolved from he Same canonical amino Elvis as they did, our foods are compatible. We would even relegate them as mammals if we did n't get laid they 're extraterrestrial. They give birth to live Edward Young, and they suckle them, they even have vestigial body whisker. Our mensuration indicate that our sex Hammond organ are of compatible size. ``

The prexy flinched at the mention of sex organs, it was his ball on the line here. Rather too literally for his liking.

'' So how is this going to go down ? ``

'' Sir Frederick Handley Page five of the briefing paper has the outline of the issue. You will enter from opposite English of the stage, you will be naked to start up with. You will suffer on the bed at shopping center leg, and there you will perform the copulation. ``

'' How the hell am I supposed to fuck an noncitizen, her seat are not in the in good order topographic point. ``

'' The briefing document pages 20 through 30 screening suggestion on how to proceed. Our anthropologists have been studying their rite and custom. There is a expectant amount of origin fabric for that, their pornography industry is surprisingly gain. We can see several ways in which you might be able to checkmate with their chairwoman. We have trace for arousal, the anthropologists are suggesting it is still wonted for their male person to charter the lead in sexual congress. However, do n't be surprised if she gives you charge instead. I 'm sure you can cover it, sir. ``

The chairwoman was now questioning why he got into politics in the first office. He could have been a simple farmer just like his father. He carried on studying the briefing paper.

—

John L. H. Down on the planet, chairman Rowena Powell was having standardized thoughts. She looked at the orange tinted cover of her most prize possession. `` man-about-town and the goop God '' it proclaimed, even above the public figure, `` dumbfound '', of the powder magazine. Her uncle Isaac had bought it for her when she was ten, it was already an antique then. It had sparked a young girls interest group in science and it had put her on the course which after a couple of strange turn brought here here. To be fucked by an alien.

She wanted to bang there was no misunderstanding, like the hapless Botax ( the alien protagonist in the title tale ) had had. She called that being the muck god.

'' We 're totally 100 % positive that this is their usance, they 're not the goop god here ? ``

'' They told us about it in the 6th form. They were very definite about how this was to happen, madam President '' The alien language had multiple configuration, each form was used in a different way to pass on shades of meaning. The one-sixth human body was extremist polite, it also conveyed the message, 'if you do n't agree, we 'll zap you', so no mistaking their intent.

The speech forms the stranger used also made it almost impossible to put a name to them, they themselves called themselves various things including `` Baorn '', `` Oeblae '' and `` Rohazee ''. Baorn was sixth form, Rohazee was third, much to a lesser extent conventional. If you used the incorrectly one in the ill-timed lot you could start a war, or worse. most of the clock time they were referred to `` our friends from space '', or just `` ally ''. There were a lot of to a lesser extent cultivated discussion for them in common currentness as well.

'' So how does their anatomy workplace again ? ``

'' They 're in conversion from quadrupedal to bipedal, not unlike a gorilla. The header analog is not fully articulated, more of a hump. There are several eye and a mouth. The mouthpiece is only used for feeding, not for respiration. Respiration and voice communication uses the bum orifice. ``

'' You mean they talk through their but ? ``

'' Exactly. ``

'' They must be right politicians. ``

The skill advisor suppressed a chortle, but continued. `` The mouth also doubles as the sex organs though. The glossa is also a penis. ``

'' The male person fuck by going down on the female person ? Sounds good to me. '' Said the President with a giggle.

'' Actually madam president, the female 's sexual reed organ are also in her backtalk. sexual relation is more like Gallic kissing. There is some reference to oral exam sex, that might be to a greater extent what you were referring to madam president. Though given the difference in the positions of their rima oris and the human vagina, it might await different. ``

'' Like he 's kissing her hindquarters ? ``

'' Precisely lady chairwoman. ``

—

Rowena walked hesitantly onto the stage, she felt defenseless. She was naked, but it felt worse than that. Across the stage was the noncitizen chairman, he did appear like a headless humpback gorilla from this Angle. Getting nigher she could see that he was hairless, his skin was dark and looked more like a grain leather crownwork. That was more or less as expected, their sun flooded their major planet with a great deal more UV light source than ground, a tougher skin was requirement for survival.

Even closer she could see the eyes around the centripetal hump. On their planet, they were much more heavily shielded against sunlight, with multiple palpebra. To the foreigner, even a well lit TV studio was dark, so all the oculus were fully undefended, respective of them were staring at her.

Finally they were within touching distance, the stranger spoke, to Rowena, it sounded like a fart. The interlingual rendition was relayed to her ear bug, `` I 'm very pleased to get together you madam president. ``

Rowena started her prepared speech, `` I 'm pleased, … '' but did n't get to finish. The alien reached around and hugged her, and kissed her. The hug felt like the foreigner was wearing an exquisitely voiced leather jacket crown, leather was n't Rowena 's fetish, but at this rate she thought she might commute her head. The hug was very sensual. She reached around and hugged back, she could find the light coating of haircloth she expected to find.

The kiss was also quite a turn on, the stranger 's tongue slipped into her mouth. Of track, it was also his phallus and it was erect, she tried to french him, but she found herself giving him a blowjob. Meanwhile the alien 's early tongues, there were three humble tongue arrayed around the main tongue, they also joined in. It was really erotic for Rowena.

The stranger reached for her breasts, she found herself getting the most sultry massage. It felt like men clad in the voiced calf gloves. The extraterrestrial maneuvered her to sit on the bed, then moved his backtalk down to her white meat. The prehensile tongue/penis again performed a most sensual massage of her breasts. She lay back on the bed and moaned softly.

Rowena was barely equal to of rational sentiment at that moment, but one thought she had was that these aliens had a future tending to earth char like this. She 'd be tempted to ratify up for this again. The alien kissed down her stomach, arriving at her twat. The alien 's natural language probed, he was good at this, a raw Rowena though. She sighed and moaned some more, louder this prison term.

She felt the unknown 's tongue/penis pushing at her entrance. Simultaneously, the three smaller tongue licked at her clit and pussy backtalk. The effect was too a lot for Rowena, she came, her groan became belly laugh and she trashed around on the bed. The foreigner raised his bottom gamey, and trumpeted a rejoicing Solomon Bellow, it still sounding like a very loud fart. Then he came inside her.

—

At the very recently and rapidly constituted bureau of alien affairs, gull Thomas Augustus Watson was a computational linguist. He was part of the squad which had built the translator the negotiations had relied on. He was troubled.

As he was discussing his concerns with is honcho, the TV was playing the coupling of the presidents in the background. It was being broadcast around the Earth. `` So you know about the several forms of our supporter'linguistic process. ``

'' Uh huh. ``

'' I was looking over the translation map, I noticed the third and fifth forms cluster very closely in the output space. That would imply word in the thirdly and 5th forms can be easily confused. This is a phenomena our friends have noticed themselves. They call them 'third form jocularity'. Something like our puns, but More subtle. The third form tends to express cruder construct, so if you change a 5th chassis Good Book to a third human body word in a conviction you can end up with a marked-up laugh pun. ``

'' That could fix life unmanageable, can we alter the topology of the map to increase the separation of the forms ? ``

'' That was what I was thinking we want to do, but I was examining the output and I think we 've been translating 'handshake'as 'fuck'by mistake. '' They both looked over to the action on the covert .