Chapter One

The day started as it usually did. Groggily, Jess leaned over to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock. He was so play out because he had been doing xxx 60 minutes a workweek at work lately and he was n't sleeping well because of his home aliveness. Add in school and the prep that came along with it and it was midnight or later by the clip he got to bed."Who invented these things anyway ? ”, he thought as he climbed out of bed.

Showered and dressed, he went downstairs to get some breakfast."Hi Jess ”, his comrade and sister said to him, almost in unison."Hi ”, he replied back. After eating breakfast, he went back upstairs to brush his tooth. Then he came downstairs again and went to see his mother. Jess always went to his mother 's way and said"honorable morning time"to her before leaving for schooling. Why he still did, he was n't sure. He had become so upstage, there was no actual connecter left."Probably just out of use ”, he told himself. He kissed his mother good-by and then left with his comrade for school.

In the car, he and his crony did n't verbalize much. It was n't that they did n't like each former, but Jess and Luke had very petty in common these days. They had different friends, Luke being more of a sociable butterfly ; dissimilar tastes in euphony, Jess listened to more enceinte metal and rock 'n' roll, while Luke was more into the pop music fit ; etc ... Once they got to schooltime, that was it. The car ride there was the most sentence they spent with each other in a day and whichever one was n't driving that day just stared at their headphone the intact ride.

Everyday he dreaded going to school. high school shoal had never been"as advertised"to Jess. He was a loner, an pariah. He had not even a handful of friends, everyone knew everyone, but that was about it. Recently he had been feeling more and more press down, his thoughts sometimes turning to suicide. habitation life was ... well it was n't a menage anymore ...

"commodity cockcrow Mr. Knight ”, said his homeroom teacher, Mr. Toer."Morning ”, Jess replied back. He took his seat and started on the homework he did n't finish finale night. Math was a particularly hard bailiwick for Jess. He was just one bad grade away from failing the subject for the semester, but at this point that was the last thing on his mind. Staring at the space sheet of theme in front line of him, his mind started to wander."What am I even doing here ? I have no purpose, no desire, no happiness. If I decided to just run away today, will anyone care ? Will my parents notice if I 'm not there ?"The bell for the end of homeroom rang, jolting him back into cognisance."hoot it ”, he thought, realizing he had n't done a individual problem.

When the chime rang at 3:05, he was already driving away from shoal ( his brother was in ROTC and stayed for after-school bodily process ), his animal foot to the floor and the radio clamor. euphony had become Jess'only reprieve from his life history and he was retreating into it more and more, barely paying care to anything else. Music made him feel powerful, made him find like he had a rationality to live. It seemed that the language of the Song on the radio spoke directly to him, lifting him up, making him feel happy that someone, somewhere understood what he felt.

When he got home, Jess went straight to his room. As he was changing into his work uniform, he took a facial expression at himself in the mirror. He was 16, had long, sullen dark-brown hair, galvanizing blue optic, was about six groundwork tall, and had slim consistency. The person staring back at him looked so far away, it looked like him, but it was n't him. The center of the person in the mirror looked so desolate and empty it was shocking. Sighing to himself, he turned off the light and headed to work.

At body of work that nighttime, he just floated aimlessly through the evening, barely engaging the customers, just wanting the night to end so that he could go home and sleep. Sleep, the one matter and one time of the day when he did n't sense hollow, lifeless. When did n't feel anything but peace. The side by side day was Sabbatum and he did n't have to go to bring or schooling so he could slumber all through the dark and well into the morning.

Opening the door to his house after workplace, Jess got a halfhearted"Hi"from his parents. The kind of"hi"that you say out of politeness, not because you actually meant it. He replied back, asked if anyone had made dinner that night, and then went to his room. Turning on his data processor, he checked his e-mail. As usual, it was just a clump of spam, but then Jess saw the e-mail. Wesley had responded to him ! Jess read the e-mail, then shut off his computer and got into bed. Falling asleep, he smiled to himself, feeling some small signified of hope.


criticism welcome. Like I said, let me have it away if I should retain .