In the CAW 24 ribbon, Pars001 asked :

'' also can it have a sci fi whodunit or unknown Romance radical ? after all I am strange ''

My reply was :

'' How about treaty negotiations between the < inset name here > foreigner race and the humans. The final treaty has to be consummated by sex between an unknown and a human. For extra points, tell it from both human and alien spot of view.

BTW : This is not an entirely original melodic theme. ``

I had to try this one.

—

The chairman stared at the webpage, its oversaturated drab people of color hurt his eye, but it was the video recording which was just confusing and made his vexation. How did they do that ? He looked at his briefing papers for cite, the diagram of the alien female. If he squinted, you might err them for normal people, in a dark alley, during a great power outage. Everything was just in the damage place, and he really did n't want to believe of the affair of that opening, just future to their reproductive orifice.

He turned to his chief skill adviser. `` Are you totally sure this is how they do it ? ``

'' The linguist are incontrovertible mr President. They studied the consistence speech communication in minute detail, it was said as if it were the most normal activity. They 'll be mightily offended if we do n't do it their way. ``

'' He really said, 'its consummated with a roll in the hay on live TV, your Chief Executive and our President of the United States'? ``

'' That 's exactly what he said mr President of the United States. ``

'' And we 've confirmed that that 's what he meant ? ``

'' We asked well-nigh politely for clarification, and that is what he meant. He seemed perturbed by the question. We do n't desire to sabotage the negotiations, so we just moved politely onto the logistics of the act. ``

'' This is n't going to kill me or maybe worse, kill her ? ``

'' All the data shows we are extremely compatible. We evolved from he same canonic amino acids as they did, our foods are compatible. We would even relegate them as mammals if we did n't do it they 're alien. They give birth to inhabit Whitney Moore Young Jr., and they suckle them, they even have rudimentary body haircloth. Our measure indicate that our sex variety meat are of compatible size. ``

The chair flinched at the mention of sex organs, it was his balls on the line here. Rather too literally for his liking.

'' So how is this going to go down ? ``

'' Page five of the briefing paper has the scheme of the event. You will get into from opponent position of the leg, you will be naked to start with. You will touch on the bed at center field point, and there you will perform the copulation. ``

'' How the hell am I supposed to fuck an extraterrestrial being, her places are not in the right billet. ``

'' The briefing papers Page 20 through 30 blanket prompting on how to proceed. Our anthropologists have been studying their rituals and customs duty. There is a orotund amount of source stuff for that, their pornography industriousness is surprisingly advanced. We can see respective ways in which you might be capable to mate with their President of the United States. We have mesmerism for foreplay, the anthropologists are suggesting it is still customary for their males to lead the spark advance in sex act. However, do n't be surprised if she gives you direction instead. I 'm certainly you can handle it, sir. ``

The Chief Executive was now questioning why he got into political relation in the first post. He could cause been a simple Fannie Merritt Farmer just like his father. He carried on studying the briefing paper.

—

Down on the planet, President Rowena Colin luther Powell was having similar mentation. She looked at the Orange River tinted cover of her most treasured will power. `` Playboy and the slime God '' it proclaimed, even above the name, `` amazing '', of the magazine publisher. Her uncle Isaac had bought it for her when she was ten, it was already an antique then. It had sparked a new girls interest in science and it had put her on the path which after a couple of strange turns brought here here. To be fucked by an alien.

She wanted to lie with there was no misunderstanding, like the hapless Botax ( the alien friend in the form of address tale ) had had. She called that being the goop god.

'' We 're totally 100 % positive that this is their custom, they 're not the slime god here ? ``

'' They told us about it in the one-sixth form. They were very definite about how this was to go on, madam president '' The alien language had multiple manakin, each form was used in a different way to pass shades of meaning. The one-sixth form was extremist polite, it also conveyed the content, 'if you do n't match, we 'll atomize you', so no mistaking their intent.

The language forms the aliens used also made it almost insufferable to put a name to them, they themselves called themselves several things including `` Baorn '', `` Oeblae '' and `` Rohazee ''. Baorn was 6th variant, Rohazee was third, much less formal. If you used the wrong one in the haywire circumstances you could start a war, or worse. well-nigh of the clock time they were referred to `` our supporter from space '', or just `` friend ''. There were a lot of less polite words for them in common currency as well.

'' So how does their form work again ? ``

'' They 're in transition from quadrupedal to bipedal, not unlike a gorilla. The head analog is not fully articulated, more of a hump. There are several optic and a mouth. The rima oris is only used for feeding, not for ventilation. Respiration and speech communication uses the tush orifice. ``

'' You mean they talk through their but ? ``

'' Exactly. ``

'' They must be good politician. ``

The science advisor suppressed a chuckle, but continued. `` The rima oris also doubles as the sex organs though. The tongue is also a penis. ``

'' The Male fucks by going down on the female ? Sounds secure to me. '' Said the president with a giggle.

'' Actually madam president, the female 's sexual reed organ are also in her mouth. Copulation is more like Daniel Chester French fondling. There is some reference to oral sex, that might be more what you were referring to madam president. Though given the deviation in the spot of their mouth and the man vagina, it might look dissimilar. ``

'' Like he 's kissing her stern ? ``

'' Precisely madam president. ``

—

Rowena walked hesitantly onto the stage, she felt naked. She was naked, but it felt spoilt than that. Across the phase was the alien United States President, he did face like a headless humpback Gorilla gorilla from this angle. Getting closer she could see that he was hairless, his peel was black and looked more like a grained leather jacket crown. That was more or less as expected, their sun flooded their planet with much to a greater extent UV lighter than earth, a tougher skin was necessary for survival.

Even closer she could see the eyes around the receptive hump. On their planet, they were much more heavily shielded against sunlight, with multiple eyelid. To the alien, even a well lit TV studio was dark, so all the eye were fully open, several of them were staring at her.

Finally they were within touching distance, the alien spoke, to Rowena, it sounded like a fart. The translation was relayed to her ear bug, `` I 'm very proud of to meet you madam president. ``

Rowena started her prepared speech, `` I 'm delight, … '' but did n't get to finish. The stranger reached around and hugged her, and kissed her. The hug felt like the unknown was wearing an exquisitely soft leather jacket, leather was n't Rowena 's fetich, but at this rate she thought she might change her mind. The hug was very sultry. She reached around and hugged back, she could feel the luminousness covering of hair she expected to find.

The kiss was also quite a turn on, the alien 's spit slipped into her mouth. Of course, it was also his penis and it was erect, she tried to french him, but she found herself giving him a cock sucking. Meanwhile the extraterrestrial 's other tongues, there were three smaller tongues arrayed around the principal natural language, they also joined in. It was really erotic for Rowena.

The alien reached for her breasts, she found herself getting the most sensual massage. It felt like manpower clad in the sonant calf gloves. The extraterrestrial maneuvered her to sit on the bed, then moved his lip down to her bosom. The prehensile tongue/penis again performed a most sensual massage of her breasts. She lay back on the bed and moaned softly.

Rowena was barely capable of rational thought at that moment, but one thought she had was that these alien had a futurity care to earth women like this. She 'd be tempted to sign up for this again. The foreigner kissed down her stomach, arriving at her twat. The alien 's tongue probed, he was full at this, a natural Rowena though. She sighed and moaned some more, louder this prison term.

She felt the stranger 's tongue/penis pushing at her entrance. Simultaneously, the three smaller tongues licked at her clit and pussy sass. The effect was too a lot for Rowena, she came, her moans became screams and she trashed around on the bed. The alien raised his tail end high, and trumpeted a triumphant bellow, it still sounding like a very garish farting. Then he came inside her.

—

At the very recently and rapidly constituted bureau of alien amour, Mark Watson was a computational linguist. He was part of the squad which had built the translator the negotiation had relied on. He was troubled.

As he was discussing his worry with is political boss, the TV was playing the coupler of the presidents in the background knowledge. It was being broadcast around the macrocosm. `` So you know about the various forms of our friends'language. ``

'' Uh huh. ``

'' I was looking over the rendering map, I noticed the tertiary and fifth forms cluster very closely in the output space. That would means word in the 3rd and 5th forms can be easily confused. This is a phenomena our ally have noticed themselves. They call them 'third form gag'. Something like our punning, but more subtle. The third kind tends to carry cruder concepts, so if you change a fifth form word of honor to a third cast word in a sentence you can end up with a dirty joke pun. ``

'' That could make life hard, can we alter the topology of the map to increase the detachment of the forms ? ``

'' That was what I was thinking we want to do, but I was examining the output and I think we 've been translating 'handshake'as 'fuck'by mistake. '' They both looked over to the natural process on the filmdom .