# 9
A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front end desk, he accidentally bumps into a fair sex beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her chest. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, `` ma'am, if your marrow is as soft as your white meat, I know you 'll forgive me. '' She replies, `` if your member is as strong as your human elbow, I 'm in room 1221. ``

# 8
A Cy Young man walks up and sits down at the bar. `` What can I get you ? '' the bartender inquires. `` I want 6 scene of Jagermeister, '' responded the young man. `` 6 shots ? ! ? Are you celebrating something ? '' `` Yeah, my starting time cock sucking. '' `` wellspring, in that character, let me reach you a 7th on the house. '' `` No offence, sir. But if 6 snapshot wo n't get rid of the gustatory modality, naught will. ``

# 7
A man of affairs boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated succeeding to an absolutely gorgeous fair sex. They exchange brief howdy and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistic. He asks her about it and she replies, `` This is a very interesting al-Qur'an about intimate statistics. It identifies that American Amerind have the prospicient average phallus and fine-tune men have the grown medium diameter. By the way, my figure is Jill. What 's yours ? '' He coolly replies, `` Tonto Kawalski, overnice to meet you. ``

# 6
One night, as a duad lay down for bed, the hubby gently taps his married woman on the shoulder joint and starts rubbing her arm. The married woman turns over and says : `` I 'm sorry honey, I 've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh. '' The husband, rejected, turns over and attempt to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This sentence he whispers in her ear : `` Do you bear a tooth doctor fitting tomorrow too ? ``

# 5
Bill worked in a pickle manufacturing plant. He had been employed there for a number of age when he came home one day to squeal to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an itch to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to mouth about it, but posting indicated that he 'd be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own. One day a few calendar week later, Bill came home absolutely livid. His wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. `` What 's damage, eyeshade ? '' she asked. `` Do you retrieve that I told you how I had this rattling itch to put my phallus into the pickle slicer ? '' `` Oh, Bill, you did n't. '' `` Yes, I did. '' `` My God, Bill, what happened ? '' `` I got fired.. '' `` No, vizor. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer ? '' `` Oh ... she got fired too. ``

# 4
A man was visiting his wife in hospital where she has been in a coma for respective years. On this visit he decides to rub her left titty instead of just talking to her. On doing this she lets out a sigh. The man runs out and tells the doctor who says this is a good preindication and suggests he should try rubbing her right breast to see if there is any response. The man goes in and scratch her mighty breast and this brings a moan. From this, the doctor suggests that the man should go in and try oral sex, saying he will wait outside as it is a personal act and he does n't want the man to be embarrassed. The man goes in then comes out about five minutes later, tweed as a sheet and tells the doctor his wife is dead. The MD asks what happened to which the man replies : `` She choked. ``

# 3
A guy manner of walking into a bar with a pet gator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons. `` I 'll make you a deal. I 'll open this alligator 's mouth and post my genitals inside. Then the gator will come together his mouth for one minute. He 'll then open his oral fissure and I 'll off my unit whole. In getting even for w itnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink. ``

The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his pant, and placed his privates in the alligator 's open sassing. The gator closed his mouth as the crew gasped. After a hour, the man grabbed a beer bottleful and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The alligator opened his backtalk and the man removed his private parts unscathed as promised. The gang cheered and the inaugural of his free swallow were delivered.

The man stood up again and made another whirl. `` I 'll pay anyone $ 100 who 's bequeath to contribute it a try ''. A stillness fell over the bunch. After a piece, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A fair sex timidly spoke up. `` I 'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle ''.

# 2
A minor white guy goes into an elevator, when he gets in he notices a huge black dude standing succeeding to him. The big black fellow looks down upon the small whitened guy and says : `` 7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch gumshoe, 3 Pound left ball, 3 lb right ball, Turner Brown '' The small whiteness guy faints ! !

The big black buster picks up the modest white guy and brings him to, slapping his face and shaking him and asks the pocket-size Stanford White guy. `` What 's damage ? ''. The small white guy says ; `` Excuse me but what did you say ? ''. The big Black person dude looks down and says `` 7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, my name is turner Brown. '' The small ovalbumin guy says, `` Thank god, I thought you said 'Turn around .'''

# 1
There was this brace who had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, `` Just retrieve, dearest, we 've been married for 50 years. '' `` Yeah, '' she replied, `` Just think, fifty geezerhood ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together. '' `` I know, '' the old man said, `` We were probably sitting here naked as jaybird fifty years ago. '' `` wellspring, '' grannie snickered, `` What do you say ... should we get naked ? '' Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. `` You know, dearest, '' the little old madam breathlessly replied, `` My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago. '' `` I would n't be surprised, '' replied Gramps. `` One 's in your chocolate and the other is in your oatmeal ! ! ! !