In the CAW 24 ribbon, Pars001 asked :

'' also can it sustain a sci fi mystery or alien romanticism theme ? after all I am strange ''

My response was :

'' How about pact negotiation between the < cut-in epithet here > outlander race and the mankind. The final treaty has to be consummated by sex between an alien and a human. For surplus points, tell it from both homo and alien points of view.

BTW : This is not an entirely master copy idea. ``

I had to try this one.

—

The president stared at the webpage, its oversaturated Amytal colour hurt his optic, but it was the television which was just confusing and made his headache. How did they do that ? He looked at his briefing written document for reference, the diagram of the alien female person. If he squinted, you might mistake them for normal the great unwashed, in a dingy alley, during a power outage. Everything was just in the faulty place, and he really did n't require to think of the function of that orifice, just next to their reproductive orifice.

He turned to his gaffer skill advisor. `` Are you totally for sure this is how they do it ? ``

'' The linguists are positive mr United States President. They studied the body language in minute detail, it was said as if it were the most normal natural process. They 'll be mightily offended if we do n't do it their way. ``

'' He really said, 'its consummated with a fuck on live TV, your president and our president'? ``

'' That 's exactly what he said mr President of the United States. ``

'' And we 've confirmed that that 's what he meant ? ``

'' We asked almost politely for clarification, and that is what he meant. He seemed perturbed by the interrogative. We do n't want to weaken the negotiation, so we just moved politely onto the logistics of the act. ``

'' This is n't going to kill me or maybe worse, pop her ? ``

'' All the information shows we are extremely compatible. We evolved from he same basic amino group Zen as they did, our foods are compatible. We would even classify them as mammalian if we did n't bonk they 're alien. They give birth to live young, and they suckle them, they even have rudimentary body hair. Our measurements indicate that our sex organs are of compatible sizing. ``

The chairperson flinched at the mention of sex harmonium, it was his bollock on the subscriber line here. Rather too literally for his liking.

'' So how is this going to go down ? ``

'' Page five of the briefing newspaper has the outline of the event. You will record from opposite sides of the microscope stage, you will be naked to set forth with. You will meet on the bed at marrow microscope stage, and there you will perform the sex act. ``

'' How the pit am I supposed to have a go at it an unknown, her blank space are not in the good billet. ``

'' The briefing document pages 20 through 30 screen suggestions on how to carry on. Our anthropologists have been studying their rituals and usage. There is a large amount of source material for that, their pornography industry is surprisingly advanced. We can see various ways in which you might be able to mate with their chair. We have hypnotism for foreplay, the anthropologists are suggesting it is still customary for their male person to take the Pb in copulation. However, do n't be surprised if she gives you way instead. I 'm sure you can handle it, sir. ``

The president was now questioning why he got into politics in the first position. He could have been a simple Fannie Merritt Farmer just like his father. He carried on studying the briefing paper.

—

John L. H. Down on the planet, President of the United States Rowena Powell was having similar thoughts. She looked at the orange tinted cover of her most treasure possession. `` man-about-town and the Slime God '' it proclaimed, even above the name, `` nonplus '', of the magazine. Her uncle Isaac had bought it for her when she was ten, it was already an antique then. It had sparked a young girls interestingness in science and it had put her on the way which after a couplet of strange crook brought here here. To be fucked by an alien.

She wanted to know there was no misunderstanding, like the hapless Botax ( the foreigner admirer in the deed story ) had had. She called that being the guck god.

'' We 're totally 100 % positive that this is their custom, they 're not the slime god here ? ``

'' They told us about it in the sixth form. They were very definite about how this was to happen, madam president '' The foreigner language had multiple forms, each manakin was used in a unlike way to communicate shades of meaning. The sixth form was ultra polite, it also conveyed the message, 'if you do n't check, we 'll nuke you', so no mistaking their intent.

The language forms the stranger used also made it almost unimaginable to put a name to them, they themselves called themselves various things including `` Baorn '', `` Oeblae '' and `` Rohazee ''. Baorn was sixth class, Rohazee was third, much less evening gown. If you used the wrong one in the damage portion you could start a war, or worse. Most of the time they were referred to `` our protagonist from outer space '', or just `` champion ''. There were a lot of less polite words for them in unwashed currentness as well.

'' So how does their shape work again ? ``

'' They 're in transition from quadrupedal to bipedal, not unlike a gorilla. The drumhead analog is not fully articulated, more of a hump. There are several eyes and a mouth. The mouth is only used for feeding, not for respiration. internal respiration and speech uses the posterior orifice. ``

'' You mean they talk through their but ? ``

'' Exactly. ``

'' They must be good politicians. ``

The science consultant suppressed a chuckle, but continued. `` The mouth also doubles as the sex organs though. The lingua is also a member. ``

'' The Male ass by going down on the female ? Sounds safe to me. '' Said the chair with a giggle.

'' Actually madam President, the female person 's intimate pipe organ are also in her mouth. Copulation is more like French petting. There is some reference work to oral sex, that might be More what you were referring to madam president. Though given the difference in the positions of their mouth and the human vagina, it might depend different. ``

'' Like he 's kissing her butt ? ``

'' Precisely dame United States President. ``

—

Rowena walked hesitantly onto the stage, she felt naked. She was naked, but it felt worse than that. Across the stage was the alien president, he did await like a headless hunchback Gorilla gorilla from this angle. Getting nigher she could see that he was hairless, his skin was dark and looked more like a grained leather jacket. That was more or less as expected, their sun flooded their satellite with practically More UV visible light than Earth, a tougher cutis was necessary for survival.

Even closer she could see the oculus around the centripetal hump. On their major planet, they were much more heavily shielded against sunshine, with multiple eyelids. To the alien, even a well lit TV studio was blue, so all the middle were fully open, respective of them were staring at her.

Finally they were within touching aloofness, the outlander spoke, to Rowena, it sounded like a fart. The translation was relayed to her ear bug, `` I 'm very pleased to meet you madam president. ``

Rowena started her get up speech, `` I 'm pleased, … '' but did n't get to wind up. The alien reached around and hugged her, and kissed her. The hug felt like the unknown was wearing an exquisitely delicate leather jacket, leather was n't Rowena 's fetish, but at this rate she thought she might commute her creative thinker. The hug was very sultry. She reached around and hugged back, she could feel the light coating of haircloth she expected to find.

The kiss was also quite a crook on, the alien 's spit slipped into her rima oris. Of course, it was also his member and it was erect, she tried to french him, but she found herself giving him a blowjob. Meanwhile the extraterrestrial being 's early tongues, there were three minor tongues arrayed around the chief tongue, they also joined in. It was really erotic for Rowena.

The alien reached for her white meat, she found herself getting the most sensual massage. It felt like hands clad in the soft calfskin baseball glove. The alien maneuvered her to sit on the bed, then moved his oral cavity down to her knocker. The prehensile tongue/penis again performed a most sensual massage of her bosom. She lay back on the bed and moaned softly.

Rowena was barely able of rational thought at that moment, but one sentiment she had was that these unknown had a next tending to earth women like this. She 'd be tempted to subscribe up for this again. The extraterrestrial being kissed down her abdomen, arriving at her pussycat. The extraterrestrial 's tongue probed, he was good at this, a lifelike Rowena though. She sighed and moaned some more, louder this time.

She felt the alien 's tongue/penis pushing at her entrance. Simultaneously, the three minuscule tongues licked at her clitoris and slit lips. The essence was too often for Rowena, she came, her groan became sidesplitter and she trashed around on the bed. The unknown raised his bottom gamy, and trumpeted a triumphant bellow, it still sounding like a very loud flatus. Then he came inside her.

—

At the very recently and rapidly constituted federal agency of disaffect affairs, Mark Thomas Augustus Watson was a computational linguist. He was function of the team which had built the interpreter the negotiations had relied on. He was troubled.

As he was discussing his concerns with is boss, the TV was playing the union of the presidents in the scope. It was being broadcast around the globe. `` So you know about the various forms of our friends'lyric. ``

'' Uh huh. ``

'' I was looking over the translation map, I noticed the third and fifth forms cluster very closely in the yield space. That would means word of honor in the one-third and fifth bod can be easily confused. This is a phenomena our admirer have noticed themselves. They call them 'third form laugh'. Something like our punning, but more subtle. The third var. tends to extract cruder construct, so if you change a one-fifth pattern word to a tierce form word in a time you can end up with a sordid caper pun. ``

'' That could lay down life hard, can we alter the regional anatomy of the map to increase the separation of the forms ? ``

'' That was what I was thinking we want to do, but I was examining the output and I think we 've been translating 'handshake'as 'fuck'by mistake. '' They both looked over to the action on the CRT screen .