Chapter One

The day started as it usually did. Groggily, Jess leaned over to hit the snooze push button on my alarm clock. He was so tired because he had been doing 30 hours a workweek at work lately and he was n't sleeping well because of his home base life. Add in shoal and the homework that came along with it and it was midnight or later by the time he got to bed."Who invented these things anyway ? ”, he thought as he climbed out of bed.

Showered and dressed, he went downstairs to get some breakfast."Hi Jess ”, his brother and sister said to him, almost in unison."Hi ”, he replied back. After eating breakfast, he went back upstairs to brush his teeth. Then he came downstairs again and went to see his mother. Jess always went to his mother 's room and said"good morning"to her before leaving for school. Why he still did, he was n't trusted. He had become so distant, there was no real association left."Probably just out of habit ”, he told himself. He kissed his female parent goodby and then left with his brother for school.

In the car, he and his sidekick did n't talk much. It was n't that they did n't like each other, but Jess and Gospel of Luke had very little in commons these days. They had different friends, Saint Luke being more of a social butterfly stroke ; different tastes in music, Jess listened to more heavy metal and rock, while Gospel According to Luke was more into the pop music scene ; etc ... Once they got to schooling, that was it. The car drive there was the most time they spent with each other in a day and whichever one was n't driving that day just stared at their sound the entire ride.

Everyday he dreaded going to school. High school day had never been"as advertised"to Jess. He was a loner, an pariah. He had not even a handful of protagonist, everyone knew everyone, but that was about it. Recently he had been feeling more and more dispirit, his thought process sometimes turning to suicide. Home life was ... well it was n't a home anymore ...

"commodity morning Mr. Knight ”, said his home room teacher, Mr. Toer."Morning ”, Jess replied back. He took his seat and started on the homework he did n't cease last dark. Math was a particularly intemperately theme for Jess. He was just one bad grade away from failing the subject for the semester, but at this point that was the last thing on his mind. Staring at the vacuous sheet of paper in front of him, his mind started to cheat."What am I even doing here ? I have no intention, no desire, no happiness. If I decided to just run away today, will anyone aid ? Will my parents notice if I 'm not there ?"The bell for the end of homeroom rang, jolting him back into cognizance."Damn it ”, he thought, realizing he had n't done a 1 problem.

When the bell rang at 3:05, he was already driving away from school ( his brother was in ROTC and stayed for after-school natural process ), his fundament to the flooring and the radio blaring. Music had become Jess'only reprieve from his life story and he was retreating into it more and more, barely paying attention to anything else. medicine made him feel powerful, made him feel like he had a reason to live. It seemed that the lyric of the song on the radio receiver spoke directly to him, lifting him up, making him feel happy that person, somewhere understood what he felt.

When he got home, Jess went straight to his room. As he was changing into his body of work uniform, he took a look at himself in the mirror. He was 16, had long, dark brown hair, electric gloomy eyes, was about six invertebrate foot marvelous, and had slim body. The soul staring back at him looked so far away, it looked like him, but it was n't him. The center of the person in the mirror looked so forsake and empty it was shocking. Sighing to himself, he turned off the light and headed to work.

At work that night, he just floated aimlessly through the evening, barely engaging the customers, just wanting the night to end so that he could go home and sleep. Sleep, the one thing and one time of the day when he did n't palpate excavate, lifeless. When did n't palpate anything but peace. The next day was Saturday and he did n't have to go to work or schoolhouse so he could slumber all through the night and well into the forenoon.

Opening the door to his planetary house after work, Jess got a halfhearted"Hi"from his parents. The kind of"hi"that you say out of politeness, not because you actually meant it. He replied back, asked if anyone had made dinner that night, and then went to his room. Turning on his computer, he checked his e-mail. As common, it was just a crowd of junk e-mail, but then Jess saw the e-mail. Wesley had responded to him ! Jess read the electronic mail, then shut off his computer and got into bed. Falling asleep, he smiled to himself, feeling some small sense of hope.


critique welcome. Like I said, let me bed if I should continue .